Last year felt so blurry. Time has wandered like a flash, making everything so messy. My thoughts were in chaos, I can't standstill. Troubled heart and mind, lurking from within. A lot of questions are going on inside: am I still on the right path? Am I making a difference? Am I growing and nurturing? Questions were too much that some were left in scribbles.

Until one afternoon I sit near the window beside the beautiful pot of monstera, with the company of my favorite latte in the corner. The aroma of the coffee settled in my heart-- magically wiped all my troubles away. Then as I walked a little, the cold breeze embraced my soul like a lost child in the crowded city; I suddenly felt secure, the view was no more blurry.

As time continued to move, I gave time for myself to ponder on things. I looked closely at the details of the torn pieces and how I managed to send them back in place. Isn't it astounding? When all you ever thought were the worst of the worst, but life showed you your best. When things seemed so hopeless and lost; but found amidst the chaos that's going on around. With that moment in mind, I looked closely in my heart and saw colorful confetti oozing with positivity.

Not to mention, I went in our fluffy sofa after that, bringing the endless list of reasons to be grateful for in life; the four-cornered room that I can curl my body comfortably with; the food that makes my tummy bloat by fullness; the gift of family and friends whom I can spend some quality time with; and so many reasons to mention that I might need a thousand papers to list them with. With that, I realized how blessed I am despite all the struggles, difficulties, and mishaps that I went through. It was all worth it.

Looking back, I have seen how I struggled walking through the bumpy road towards where I am now. I could feel the pain of my feet as I walked barefoot through the road of my dreams. As I try to bring back the fresh memories of my past, I could see myself as a flower almost withered in the corner. I have seen my lowest low, not knowing my highest high will appear. No matter how much I wanted to give up, there's still a light that I could see through the cracks that gave me hope to keep going.

Grateful to meet these people in my life.

Now I am here, to the goal I once had in mind. The goal that once motivated me to continue, but end up feeling lost. Howbeit, end up being found as the dreams that I once had, awaken inside me. Truly, when things get rough, a reminder will soon come, delivered most unexpectedly. With that, I could say l that no matter how painful it is for me to experience feeling lost, I am still proud of myself that she move forward despite the adversities of life.

"I'm proud of you my dearest self!" That's all I could have in mind.

Indeed, there will be times in our lives when we are being challenged. Challenges that will test how are we going to respond to them. Will we be moved like a thin stick that easily gets broken in a simple storm, or are we the strong tree that stands tall amid the storms of life? Needless to say, we should always choose to be the strong tree that continues to stay firm no matter what. We should never be swayed by storms that we will be bumping in life. We should never allow the adversities and the doubts to forget the dreams that we had in mind. We should continue to find the pieces that were lost no matter what.

Truly in life, we tend to get lost on the track. We tend to forget what we once wanted. We tend to be ungrateful for the blessing that we receive for we question a lot of those blessings are for us. We tend to question a lot that it will leave our mind and heart in war, not knowing how to stop.

Closing Thoughts

My dearest friends, if you feel like something's lost inside you, never get tired of finding the missing piece to complete you again. Never be swayed and end up giving up. In no time, that missing piece will be found again and you will feel such a relief. So never give up no matter what. Learn to be grateful for the little things. One day you will be grateful to say that your lost track will be a blessing in disguise. Have faith!

Date Published: February 8, 2022