You know some people choose their family right? They aren't always lucky enough to be born into a ready made one. They may find the one they're in Isn't so sweet, isn't so loving, isn't a good fit. So they make their own. They create a way out, an escape route. A way forward With people they can trust and where they can love or be loved. They have an alternative family. Not just friends nor "besties ", nor mentors or any of the labels you put on things.. but family. Different blood but same feeling Just as much a part of your life as any other family, but these ones you chose. So you're gonna choose right, right? WRONG! Oh please dear friend, read on...we can't always get it right. Even these special people can break our hearts. Even they can hurt you.
And what makes the betrayal so heart wrenching isn't so much the painful act itself, it's that you let them in. You opened your heart, your welcoming arms and invited them into your life with a willingness to share. If family let you down you could forgive them, they never chose to be part of your life, they were born into it. Chance s are you may be as different as chalk and cheese, but they never "joined up", they just got drafted into service alongside you. But with the people you chose as family, that's different as you hand picked people to be that close to you. Allowed them willingly to join you in life's journey. You expected something more from them. They're family out of what you forged together, not from a matter of simple natural process. You did the choosing, not nature. And you chose wrong.
That seems wrong It seems harsh. Why Can you put greater emphasis on loyalty from them than that ot your pre-existing family? Why could we forgive the latter far easier than the former. The simple reason is love. You embrace them in life because you love them. You're loyal because you choose to be, not because of some blood tic you feel an obligation towards; but because you want to be. They know you perhaps better than blood family because they know the real you. You don't hide yourself from them. You feel safe to be yourself and reveal your true nature. And you felt loyalty, love and secrecy between you both. You truly felt they'd never let you down..but they did....and it hurts. It hurts a lot.
Katy had a best friend when she grew up. They lived next door to her. Had done for fifteen years since she moved here with her broken family at the age of three. Up until her two years ago they'd been inseparable. Ever since attending pre-school together, then school and they made plans for Uni...but they never made it that far. Priyanka was her family up until then. Her chosen family, her lifeline. She hadn't made many friends unlike het. She wasn't as beautiful, as easy going, as clever nor as lucky as Priyanka, but as it turned out what she was more than her, was loyal. She'd introduced her to the only boy who'd ever shown an interest in Katy. He'd adored her and followed her around with big puppy eyes and she thought he was cute. After several years of gradually like becoming stronger, closer and more special she thought just maybe, she may love him. She was sixteen and young and in love. She couldn't tell her parents, so she'd told her other family. She told Priyanka. And Priyanka, who'd never failed to have her fair share of boys' attention listened and advised, laughed and supported het as family should. But then, one lovely Spring day, Katy introduced Priyanka to her would- be boyfriend Miguel.
She guessed she should have seen it coming She should have known, but it never entered her head. All the guys fell in love with Priyanka, she was engaging and witty, pretty and rich. But what she wasn't as it transpired was loyal. Those great big hazel puppy dog eyes that had once fallen so readily on her started to be turned full beam on her best mate Priyanka. She didn't notice at first. She never thought for one moment to object when they started from that point on, to want to go round as a threesome. To share the laughter, the love and the joy of extending her family further was her delight, her pleasure, her privilege. And in truth...her downtall. It turned out, one rainy Sunday evening, the reason that she'd been feeling more of a third wheel than a third friend, was Miguel and Priyanka were in love!
They announced it so eagerly. Poor Miguel had never announced his love in so many words, but she'd felt it. She understood him and he'd held her hand and talk of his feelings. They'd even kissed once or twice but they'd neve made it formal. She just took it for granted he cared for her, that he loved her in a blossoming way, in a romantic way, in her dreams. She'd shared her hopes and dreams with Priyanka. She'd spent many an hour and an evening talking of her growing feelings of Miguel. Analysing each and every action and word. But Katy was a shy girl and didn't have the confidence Priyanka did. So she listened to her friend, she trusted her, she leaned on her. She depended on her truth. And the truth came out that day. Priyanka and Miguel were sweethearts and in love. They didn't want to hang around with her any more. They needed their privacy. Their alone time. Her heart was torn apart, and part of her family along with it too.
To be continued.
