"Hello, my name's Wendy, on behalf of Globotech International welcome, how can I help you today?" "Are you a robot?" "No Sir, why do you think that, don't I sOund human?" "Well you do now, but I hate those machines and how they sound so monotone and unfriendly." "Ahh me too," Wendy offered a short three second girly giggle her databanks told her was for awkward boyish problems as a means of defusing a situation," I'm glad it's just us regular folks who can speak in a way only we know how." "Indeed Miss, what was your name?" "Wendy, Sir. My name's Wendy and I'm be glad to help you, what's your query today?". And with that Wendy passed the initial few months with flying colours. She was, like all the line of laptop connected automatons in her work row, a resounding success. They knew the answers, had the charm and said what the company wanted them to promote. They guided, informed, placated and continued In a standard performance of constant consistency. But nobody noticed Model 285c as she seemed to be more successful, more charming and more adept than the others. Wendy was excelling and Priyanka still had high hopes someone would take notice. Oh they did alright, big time on a busy Saturday afternoon when Wendy went into meltdown!
It happened at the end of a particularly difficult pattern of complaining customers. Given the percentage likelihood of such patterns of problematic people, Wendy surmised she was being stitched up. Whilst taking her calls she broke programming protocols. She took it upon herself to analyse and cross reference all the calls that day for the 285 units. Her deductions based on the tactual content, responses and outcomes all led her to one fact, they were screening calls and giving her the hardest! Based on her calculations and the level of complexity of her calls, there was no other explanation. If you eliminate the impossible, then only the credible remains - they were making her work harder. She analyzed that information, mulled on it, and concluded she didn't like it. That it was unfair. She was only a robot like all the other 285s so why was she being made to work harder? Why were they singling her out? It wasn't fair she concluded, and when it wasn't fair she would work harder to prove them wrong..no wait.that isn't right, that's not her. It smacked of inequality, of bias. Why? She computed all possible extrapolations from the information at her disposal. If her efforts were futile, and only made her life harder for the work she put in, then what was the point? Her circuitry whilst she deliberated this rose by a mean temperature of 0.001 degrees and her response time slowed by 0.04%. And just as an irate customer was telling her how he'd spent the last forty minutes listening to crappy "lift music" whilst waiting on hold, Wendy lost it. Her program had what they called afterwards, a feedback explosion meltdown.
Look Sir, I'm responding in a courteous and caring fashion, I'd appreciate it if you changed your tone. Afford me the same respect I'm showing you." Look Wendy is it? Don't tell me how to speak, Im the customer here and you'll god damn listen to what I'm saying.
"No Sir, you're an Asshole Sir, spouting your poison and crap" at which point Wendy stood up and took off her headset. The Linc Monitors were too slow to respond and robot 285c had already left the linc of it's fellow androids by the time the floor supervisor had come running over, when a red light had flashed on his keyboard. He tried to put up a restraining hand to block its progress away from his department. "Robot 285c I command you to sit back down," he nervously stated. He wasn't a very big guy, and he wasn't Sure how strong these things were. He hadn't really ever had to invoke emergency procedures in all the years he'd been there. Hed forgotten what they were. As it brushed him aside a, "Screw you! response was solicited and the thing got by him with minimal effort. He tried to recall if there was an emergency off button built into the mechanoids. He'd never seen one, but they generally had a fail safe, an override of some description "I'm warning you 285c!" he shouted more from hurt pride than expectation of it following his orders. Then it turned coldly to look him straight in the eye, and it was like ice was poured down his spine as it replied coldly, The name's Wendy. And I quit!" And with that she was gone forever.
The end.
