Lost 33 BTC

On this wonderful day that we get payed by the awesomeness publish0x , a sure reason for celebration from that point and KuCoin is still being that receiving MVP but of course that task is shared with Binance. Its a very beautiful feeling to wake up to my portfolios having grown a whole bunch especially with the KCS of KuCoin that has a special reward just for hodling it, alongside KCS I'm hodling BTC, ETH2 ( its too tempting, the offer of transfering the ETH to ETH2) plus a few others that result in POL tokens. The portfolios looks good so good that I don't ever want to touch it. With this portfolio I never sold, all I do is buy (because I'm not a sellout hahaha) ok. I just enjoy buying more than selling, something about having sold BTC a while back at 14K and I never want to be in the bears corner again. I do sell here and there just to test momentum but I am not a seller I can't do this selling things, I produce, create, buy, bring up, selling isn't my thing, selling brings be losses, not always but in this case it's better I stay on the gains(bulls).

Talking about losses that 33 BTC is actually 33 USDT trading BTCUSDT, it's intentional actually. So the stormgain mining app finally reached $10, for the second time the first didn't last a minute, I jumped into BTC not knowing the terms and conditions of stormgain app trading. Now that I've versed up on the conditions a bit, I went in and took it easy made up to 33USDT, got my gains and headed to the hospital, needed some surgery done, got some cellulitis or whatever they call this extra cell growth. Its been bothering me for sometime.

While at the hospital I got agitated by something, felt it deep in my soul and soon after I heard that there are no surgeons die to the pandemic scam thing so I got even more mad. I had a talk with the doctors there but they were just interns, couldn't help. Made a few calls to talk to people just to calm down. Then I realised the chill that I need is not the kind that I can get from calling some people, then it hit me, I need to get the 33 to 50 so I make 50 everyday in 20 days I'll have a couple of thousands. So I popped up on the stormgain chart. Willing my happiness on my high vibrational disc I'm like I got this,

Then kaboom

It took longer like maybe some 25 minutes then it went greens and reds, we all know the story. Then it hit me again that I'm not focused, I haved been focused for a really long time but this is as close to focusing as I come. I have been self diagnosing myself easing the problem away with the vortex and happiness, it's been working except that the problem is everything in my cancer (my south node,all that I loved and mastered) I had left it all behind and now that I have completely detached I find myself drifting to the same feelings I use to think was normal. When I realised this the reds were just about 2-3 USDT, I started talking to myself that sink or swim. Gains or not, chicks or bros, one thing is for sure. That no matter what happens I will always be me, the is no changing who I have been especially not my past. I might adopt new experiences because that's the whole reason my higher self decided to reincarnate back in time and space knowing that I will have to reconcile with who I am even if I choose my new experiences. The people don't make me who I am, the food do my make me who I am, the water does not make me who I am, not does this body or mind. None of this is me, all these are tools and gifts in time and space. As I flipped the phone and decided that I will not let those feelings that used to seem like normal to me, to get back in my life and get me off my high vibrational disc that I have worked so hard for, I thought I'm only muscle and bone with Jesus and God until I heard me spoke to me. From there it was all about high vibrations but nothing could keep me there not the smoke, not the chicks, not the food, nor the people. I saw that, that which I am trying to maintain with these high vibrations come before the high vibrations and for me it starts with feeling good and knowing that nothing matters more than that I feel good.

This is number one, it's my make up, this is love to me, I feel good then my whole surroundings get to be good too. When I was at the hospital I felt that feeling take me over like I didn't even notice it and a second later I realised I'm not on my high vibrational disc, I didn't freak out, I just willed myself back on but there was some conflict after that. That same feeling wanted to get me off my high vibrational disc like it knew me or where I belonged, I observed it and the agitation fell over me and I just had conjure up some of that good good feelings of happiness as I bounced over this agitation of mine like nothing ever happened. I realised then and there that it had been my choice the whole time to be on whatever level I want to be whoever I see fit to play as in this game called life given to us by time. Further talks with the interns helped me calm a bit more but that old feeling still came following on me so I had to conjure up more of that good good feeling. On my way out of the hospital I decided to check out spirit science Ayahuasca movie that talks of the two plants in the Amazon given to the locals by the plant spirits themselves as not only medicine but the way to have life and have it abundantly.

These two plants mixed and prepared by the shaman would open your senses as you allow it to, your chackras, all 200+ of them not only 7, your third eye and so much more. In the movie it got described as everything that they came to this life for, it leads you on journeys across the realms to great mysticism. People got changed and some where observed to be more loving than before as they described that it's like being in a dream. They describe sessions they had to go through of emotional detachment, where they detach from past childhood traumas and other suppressed emotions that never got expressed that inspire mood swings and what not.

After watching this movie I felt that it explained even more to what I had just gone through. That on the path of initiation or awakening, there is no definite end or destination, it an on going thing. Same as my good good feeling of happiness kept coming back on command like I couldn't do that before now I command it. Before I couldn't tell that these other beings are just using me or taking me for a fool but now as it happens before my eyes I get to pull a bhusta rhymes and act a fool. But it's not easy, it just feels so good to know what you didn't know which paint the picture of what you don't know. Which makes it so much easier not to worry because there nothing to worry about, what you know is like a grain of sand on the beach and the beach is another baron of sand on the beach of knowledge to try and put definition or comprehension to the great unknown.

During these times of the old feeling coming and going I get stressed out then I have to stand back in super silence so I allow the stress to express itself. Its so amusing at times, I get to watch what I thought is me do its thing. The whole time I thought I was making noise I was actually just observing. Its extremely interesting. So much that I needed to separate it from myself, my art, my trades, my everything cos it showed up all over the place so much that I needed to conjure up happiness and set on the high vibrational disc just to get my higher self a bit of room. Then the all time joke comes crushing on me that we are all one and all this is just in my heard.

As I flipped the phone over I saw a message come in from Jane, she had send me a telegram message Friday informing me of the Doge +1000 % increase before it went that far but I only got that notification today on Tuesday. Its very interesting and so lovely so many confirmations that it's not in my head it all over the whole experience I am creating, actively creating. Now I have the chance to make it as beautiful as I can make it. How I am going to do that? I am now in charge of these good good feelings of happiness and getting on my high vibrational disc that's all it takes. Everything else is here to serve me, to make me stronger! There are no losses not in my world! Only lessons!

To better vibes, here's a shot of the morning before the hospital shenanigans. We had it good though we didn't sleep all night. Sometime I get to feel death is a better options but then I'm reminded that death has her conditions too. So we just got to keep growing stronger. With all this props of the no fear, the vortex, the good good really good feeling and the high vibrational disc, oh aye I can just have these and I'll be fine. But the cosmos just can't stop. On this birth month of mine we get to set the momentum and rhythm of how the next +two hundred years of Aquarius are going to be for us, with the full moon on the 11th in Aquarius in the Aquarian age, all Aquarius and aquarian. And so many 1111, it's too magical. And Mercury, the one incharge of our communications and mindsets went retrograde for us, to get us from the January 28th to carry us forth into the age of Aquarius no joke all the way to the the new moon on February 28th in virgo. I'm just so inlove with all that I'm becoming, I cannot let money or people not even what I'm not feeling, to influence my high vibrational disc or happiness. There's nothing that matters more than that I feel good. I finally get it and I'll keep getting it untill I get it and get it and get it and get it.

So this is the morning shot

Its been a whole trip. I just fall in love more with it all day everyday. I love who I am becoming, and best of all I love all that I am, as I am one with the one that is all!

Love and light!

Bless up!

Gratitude 🕉️🕉️🕉️🕉️