You can disagree and still be friends

5 16
Avatar for JophMax
1 year ago

The road to an open mind

Well, Internet has proved something over the course of Its existence, and that is the fact that some people don't take disagreements lightly, even the ones that are over things that from the outside seem so pointless. If you scroll in any publication from a famous artist, a youtube video or any tweet, you'll see a lot of discussions that end up in hate towards the other person and not being related with the main point that was the cause of the argument.

You might think that this is limited to only a few with deeper issues in their day to day life, the type of people that watch every video of someone they hate to give them a dislike and comment negatively. However, this is not the case, as this kind of problem has become so prominent that It can even split families. For example, If you take a look at the Republican/Democrat division existing in the US, you'll see that these parties will be mostly focused on demonizing the other side while not trying to at least understand the opposing points of view, seeing their points as a caricaturization of the other's flaws.

That's why in this article I'll talk about healthy disagreements, where listening and comprehending what the other has to say is a crucial tool for a succesful debate where each part can leave with a firm handshake and still being friends so you can apply It to your day to day and free your mind of unnecesary conflict. Let's begin:

Image taken from Pixabay.com. Author: mohamed_hassan

Frustration, Resentment and Confirmation Bias

If you ask yourself why so many people tend to have a closed mind with regards to their opinion nowadays in comparison with 20 years ago you'll find a clear difference in the way information is spread, where previously in your day to day, due to a higher frequency in face to face and physical conversations, the probabilities of finding yourself speaking with something that disagreed with you were much higher than in the present, where people's degree of direct interactions had reduced drastically in both quantity and quality, now being much preferred to hang out in online communities of like minded people, where we just hear the echo of what we say, not taking into account other perspectives.

Accompanying this is something that is a common component to our species, a flaw that has been preeminent in most episodes of human history, that being the confirmation bias. This is simply our tendency to always look for information through sources that we know will give us the expected outcome confirming our opinions, such as checking a website with your same political affiliations to look at a particular situation or sources that are biased in Itself. This narrowness of scope curses us to an eternal existence of stubbornness and practical mistakes that even If they can be of use in the future and teach us valuable lessons, they will end up taking many opportunities from us.

Image taken from Pixabay.com. Author: mwewering

How can we fix this?

The only way to fix these kinds of problems is taking initiative and starting with yourself, where even If you can't make people more understanding, you should at least strive to become more tolerant with other people's statements, trying to comprehend the whole narrative of their reasoning and repeating It to them If It is necessary to verify before you give a solid response against that.

The other thing you should have in mind is that disagreements are not something negative, as they are one way to establish an effective communication, putting others knowledge/beliefs to the test and leave the interaction with everyone learning something new. I know It is really painful to admit that you're wrong when you find that you are, though becoming extra resilient and fighting just because of avoiding the "humiliaton" is not the answer. That being said, when you know you're right and you verified that through objective proof and nonbiased research, you should keep your composture and If you debate about that with another person, show them what you genuinely think.

Image taken from Pixabay.com. Author: naassomz1

I hope that this article could have provided you with valuable information concerning a reality that is becoming worrying in the present, our unwillingness to listen to opinions opposed to ours, impeding our progress and not challenging old/inefficients paradigms, all while explaining how this happened and what we can do about It, all so you can become more objective when disagreeing with other people and still keep good relationships with them. Thank you for your support and good luck!

4
$ 0.03
$ 0.03 from @Porwest
Sponsors of JophMax
empty
empty
empty
Avatar for JophMax
1 year ago

Comments

Sadly it's rare to happen. Especially in politics. You will just know that they didn't understand each other if one dies.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

That's true. Politics always go into demonizing the other side to get votes.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I think there is a deep benefit to being able to have a healthy debate, and even deeply disagreeing on things.

At the end of the day I don't know everything and neither does anyone else. So, sometimes I may learn something or see things differently, and likewise the other side may too. It allows us to keep our minds open, so long as we can be open minded even in disagreement—and when we do that, maybe something productive happens.

When you close your ears and eyes you miss a lot, and I don't think that does anyone any good.

Beyond that, I find that I prefer people whom I can both disagree with and still find common ground on other things and be able to interact both when we agree AND disagree. I wish more people COULD do that. Instead, too many people get hung up on their own opinions and get their panties all in a bunch.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

I agree with you. A lot of people get so easily offended when you don't agree with them so they go and rant on social media instead of telling you their points of view. I also trust much more someone who I can disagree with and still be in good terms than someone who is always saying yes to me.

$ 0.00
1 year ago

You've got that right.

$ 0.00
1 year ago