The Answer: Deepen Your "Irreplaceability".

Why do two people seem to love vigorously, but it is difficult to get to the end? 

The reason why you can’t keep a person is because the lives of both of them are like this: as soon as the phone vibrates, you immediately put down everything, chat with the person, and look at the phone every other time, for fear of missing their news; Just look through the various social media of this person. Whenever his posts have a bit of sentimental sadness, you will immediately start thinking about whether you have done something wrong;

In your free time, you are not tired of being with this person. Even if there is nothing to do together, you just stay together and talk about nonsense.

Eventually, sooner or later one of the two people will not be able to bear the high pressure environment. The environment looks like glue and paint on the surface, but in fact, both of them have unspeakable grievances and helplessness.

Think about it carefully: Why does this kind of relationship seem to be very passionate, but it is the least likely to last?

You are too replaceable for your partner

You can return to her in seconds, and you can do it for another person; if you care about her and is good to her, you can always do it for another person; you can always be with her when she needs it, but this can also be done for another person.

It's not difficult to see why many people get tired of everything. Because the lives of you two are the same, there is nothing to talk about, and the rest of the time is nothing more than dating, eating and watching movies. The two seem to be together for a long time, but every other day is the same, and you can still keep some freshness at first. Feelings of getting along will collapse within half a year.

Love yourself first

The best way to keep a person is to never stick to each other, to never be sensitive and anxious all the time.

Manage your own life well. When you become strong and secure, your partner will never leave you. When a person is convinced that "with you, there is a future, there is expectation, and your value cannot be replaced", this is the best way to tie a person's heart.

Do you know what is the one sentence I have heard the most during the ten years of emotional counseling?

I treat her so well, why did she leave me after all?

The answer is actually very simple -> You are the only one who thinks you are good and noble in the relationship, but in the eyes of the other person, you can do it for another individual, even do it better than this.

They broke up with you because you were too kind to her, and you were too stingy with yourself.

After being in a relationship, how did you review your postgraduate entrance examination?

Have you figured out the job at hand?

Where has the life you dreamed of come true?

How many plans have you made up your mind to complete?

Was it that after you talked about a relationship, these originally important things were put on hold indefinitely by you?

This is exactly the reason why you can't keep your partner.

You must understand that "love" is indeed very important, but in everyone's life, you will slowly find that "love is just a small part of life."

If you have a relationship, where you put aside your ideals, life and self, and put love in the most important position, then I dare to tell you responsibly - This relationship will not last.

All your emotions are controlled by your partner

Think about it: when you put all the bargaining chips to maintain your relationship on your partner, this is actually a very scary thing. All your emotions are controlled by one person, and all your fantasies about life need to be satisfied by the other person. Without this person, you will never find the meaning of your life. When you have higher expectations of a person, naturally you have stricter requirements on that person. At first you just want a lover, then you want a hug, and then you want a kiss... The more you give to a person, the more feedback you want to get, and finally your love will become deformed. You start to want the other person to be meticulous, you want the other person to cook and wash the dishes, you want decency, a sense of ritual, and more and more. The original selfless love gradually began to deteriorate.

In the end, both sides were exhausted physically and mentally, and they were powerless to fight. Love naturally went into a state of parting ways.

The secret to a long-term relationship?

You have your things to do, and I have my ideals to pursue. Being together is nothing more than relieving each other's stress and relieving loneliness, not a tool to squeeze the existing life. There are no fixed standards for what you do and how long you talk every day. It's not that your feelings will fade away if you spend less time with you. It's that when you encounter something interesting, you are willing to take the initiative to tell me. I have something annoying, you are the first person that I trust and talk to.

Similarly, if others can make you laugh and chat with you, I can do all of these too. The value that exists in me cannot be replaced by others, and the same is true for you. The irreplaceable value is nowhere to be found.

In short, it is a person's aesthetics, experience, personal value, social status, ideological level, empathy ability, etc., which are the key to retaining a person. Leaving you, the other party cannot find someone who can meet her needs. You are the only one who cannot be replaced.

"What is love? In Layman's terms, love is a springboard for each other to become a better individual. Because of the existence of this love, your career, studies and life begin to enter into a virtuous cycle, the other party is also constantly becoming better because of your existence. Long-term love is a win-win relationship, and many bad relationships cannot escape the curse of internal friction."

To be more blunt, How can I keep a partner? That is, you can continue to become excellent in love, eclipse the opposite sex around the other person, make your partner feel that "she can't find someone better than you", and make potential enthusiasts feel that "I don't deserve to be with you." You compete". This sentence is particularly utilitarian when you first hear it, but isn't it true?

I am the Jobless Girl, and I want to use my content to help you meet your loved one and lock in love for a lifetime.

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