Life as a man is difficult and easy. It seems easy because men have many privileges compared to women in society, such as more freedom to play outside the house or pursue a career and be more free. But all the privileges that men have must also be accompanied by great social responsibilities.

Look around you, many men are required by social criteria to be established, must be able to control the condition of their partner and, sometimes even get frustrated and use violent means when they are unable to control the conditions outside of themselves.

In fact, there are many men who cannot fulfill all the social criteria attached to them. Imagine how difficult it is for you if you are in an unsettled condition, but this is demanded by your partner or parent. Not comfortable right? Well, now is the time for you to know a few things about the concept of "New Men". What's that? More details are below.

✓ Being a man is socially shaped

The "new men" realized that he grew up and was shaped by the social and cultural environment of society. All the privileges he has as a man are gifts from society.

So actually the "new men" realized he had a choice to reject or accept the given social formation. Like the myth that men shouldn't cry, men must be strong so they don't complain.

He knows that as a new men he has the right to be gentle, sad or to be free from the myths about men in society.

✓ Male self-image is not singular

Many men crave the ideal self-image figure. That men who win in fights, smoke and drink, spend a lot of money to go to the gym to form the ideal body like the advertising image, to have a lot of girls to be considered as men.

Meanwhile, the “new men” hold the principle that the more sincere you are in giving love, respecting your partner and refusing to use violence, the more man you will become.

✓ Solving problems not with physical fights

'Let's solve our problems as men', that's a phrase you must often hear. It is as if the solution to men's problems must be solved by physical fighting.

Whereas the problems experienced by men can be solved in ways that do not need to be violent. The “new men” put forward problem solving through discussion, good talk and solutions when facing problems with their partners and their environment.

✓ Able to communicate assertively (two-way)

Assertive communication is a form of honest communication, able to involve empathy for the other person and able to control anger. This assertive communication is used by new men to maintain a harmonious relationship with anyone.

Two-way communication avoids dominance to a partner or interlocutor. This type of communication also creates an equal relationship with your partner or with the environment.

✓ The “New men” Angry Positively

Anger is human, but anger becomes unnatural when you spill it by hitting and harming other people. So it's important for you to learn the time out technique. This time out or pause technique is useful when you are angry.

When the "new men" is angry, he doesn't spill his anger right away. He will try to control his emotions by taking a deep breath or calming himself down first. The “new men” are the ones who are able to control their anger in a positive way and don't get caught up in their own emotions.

✓ The “new men” have more respect for women

New men hold the principle that women are equal partners. He treats women with respect and does not do anything that hurts or offends women. He realized that hurting women was the same as hurting his mother, who is also a woman.

✓ Build relationships that "grow"

When having a partner, the “new men” has the principle that in a relationship, he and his partner are individuals who grow. The relationship that exists between the two also grows together. So there is no limiting term in the commitment of a relationship.

✓ Not ashamed to do domestic work

Today you must often see men who are chefs. Yes, the “new men” are no longer ashamed to do domestic work, such as washing, sweeping and cooking. She is happy to do domestic work because it can be done not only by women, but also by men.

✓ Understand the reproductive health of self, spouse or children

Many men do not know about the importance of reproductive health. Knowledge of reproductive health is important if you want to be the “new men”. For example, knowing various diseases that can cause reproductive disorders such as cancer, pregnancy and fetal disorders, to the risk of HIV/AIDS that you can experience.

It is also important for new "men" to know the condition of their partner's reproductive health. They will not be shy about reminding their partner to check pap-smear when they see their partner's unusual vaginal discharge. The “new men” are also literate about children's reproductive health education.

This understanding makes new men have the ability to be able to accompany their wives in the process of pregnancy, childbirth and eventually becoming a father.

✓ Do not stay silent when you see women experiencing violence

Most men tend to be silent or indifferent when they see women being hurt or experiencing violence.

The “new men” has the view that he should not remain silent when he sees violence against the women around him. He will move, do something to stop the cycle of violence.

Well, from some of the explanations above, do you and the men around you already fall under the criteria for "new men"? If not, you can start now.

New men, new men!

Lead image from Unplash.com