Long post ahead but please spare me a fraction of your time as I introduce myself to all of you. ❤️😘
I don't know where to begin since I have alot in my mind when I talk about this part of my life. So I think it is just right to start at the beginning. I was a college student when I was first introduced to late nights at parties and drinks. And since I am new to all the expereinces, excitement is just so overwhelming. I threw myself out with people I just met. Believing how fun and spontaneous I am. Then I met the father of my daughter, it certaintly not something out of a fairytale coz boy, he ain't that prince charming that swift me off my feet. He is more of a bad boy and bully but for some reason he got my attention. Clearly, it was like these movies about bad boys and them landing a fairytale story with the heroin. But mine was backwards. We became an instant couple when he forced himself to me. Like literally forced me. After that first encounter my life started twisting terribly wrong. He spread bad rumors about me, he became abusive verbally and emotionally aswell. I became more of a toy girl. And I didnt even know how I became as such since I have a very spirited and strong personality. I would go out with him on dates but I always pay for everything from food to drinks and even the hotel room we sleept in. And he would ask for expensive gifts for our monthsaries. Or he would invite his friends out to drink and he would let me pay for everything and I would spend my allowances and even the money for my tuition fee to please him. I was that kind of girl just to have him interested and would stick around with me. I later found out that I was his fourth girlfriend that time and he even had his first girlfriend pregnant (poor girl 😔) and few days later I found out that I WAS PREGNANT (now, poor me!). He even ask me to get rid of the baby(nice guy 😒). He would make an effort to wake up in the morning rush to my boarding house with some kind of a pill and a bottle of a very cold softdrink. This is the same guy who loves to get busy on the bed unconsciously creating a life inside me and the one who also wants it gone. I became a wack job. I lost interest in school because that time I was at my first trimester and girl, it was so hard to go places. I was always sick. My tummy was always in pain. I have terrible morning sickness and my boyfriend was messing my last bit of sanity in me. I was deeply lost. My only salvation was church and that dirty ice cream I always crave for every day. Few days later I was kicked out of my boarding house because I was unable to pay the dues on time and I was forced to live with a relative. Their at my Aunt's house I tried to hide my pregnancy, the bump was still unnoticeable but the morning sickness was always the hiccup. I would experience getting dizzy. Sometimes blood would came out of my nose. My tummy would hurt so much and sometimes I would bleed. She was always out of the house and I was left with my cousin, a ten year old girl so everything from house chores to tending the kid to laundry, cooking and errands was all mine and school and I was at weakest. Some nights I would get some rest but some I would cry myself to sleep. I know it was wrong to think of evil thoughts but I was at my weakest with nobody to lean on,and the darkest thought crossed my mind-let us just end it here my dear. No more pain. I mapped the whole house. See if I can find something strong enough to hold the both of us.
(Sorry if I posted it this long please join me again on the next part 😘)