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@JRamona20 more from that month

Mom, Dad where are you? I stood at the corner. I felt nervous. I worried a lot. I wanted to ran but I realized it will worst the situation. I don't know. I wanted to hide but no! It wasn't good. I always checked my watch. The time make me jump to worries. *"Mom, Dad where are you?"* I always said it into my mind. No voice because there were people passing by. I still hope. They said "Yes". They make a promises. I didn't give up. I saw my friends and classmates there. I saw their happy faces with their parents. It makes me more sad. I wanted to cry out loud but I couldn't make it because I was in a public place. While I was waiting, I decided to walk at the classroom that no one was there. I was really sad. My tears started to drop but I fastly get my small cloth to my tears. I felt heartaches that I couldn't explain. I almost give up on waiting. I decided to call them but no one answered it. I staring at my phone with my dropping tears already.

I felt envy those students with their parents. Mom, dad forget me. They forget their promises. They forget that I have an award in school. I did my best to achieve it because it was for them. It was my gift to them. I want them to be happy and I wanted to be proud but why. No one of them appeared. They totally forget me. They broke their promises. I believe them. I expect a lot from them. I have a lot of request from them and they were always said "Yes" then still nothing happens. I don't know what could be the reason. Is it because of their work? What about me? They have also a child that keeps waiting with their attention. Where am I? I felt sad and alone. I heard some voice. I heard someone calling at me. I saw my classmate, she told me that the program will start a few minutes. I lose my hope. It was time already. My excitement turns into worries and nervous. I sit at the chair. I didn't look at my side because it will hurt me the most that my classmates were so happy with their parents. I didn't want to look at the stage. I couldn't feel it. I turned back. I was hoping that mom and dad were there but no one. It was really hard when you are in that situation. I felt shyness in my whole self. I felt my classmates were staring at me and having a curiosity why I am alone in that chair. The program start already. I witnessed how happy my classmates receiving their awards with their parents at the stage. I imagined myself that time that I was at the stage with my parents but it was only happened from my imaginations. It never happened in real life. I don't know when. When it was my turn, I didn't heard my name because my mind was full of thoughts. I was like out of myself. My classmate tapped my shoulder then I awake it was the time I realized that it was me already but how mom and dad wasn't there. I think my teacher understand me and she was the one who accompanied me at the stage. I felt shy to all the people who attended at the program. I felt it was the biggest embarrassment I have. Even I received my award, I didn't felt happiness and excitement but full of sadness. I felt shy a lot about what happened to me. After the program I ran at the comfort room and I cry out loud. *"Mom, Dad where are you?"* After I cried. I went home already. I washed my face so they wouldn't noticed me from crying. I fastly get my bag at the classroom and walk straight home. When I was already there. *"Mom, Dad where are you?"* My parents were not home yet. I walk inside at my room and lying at bed and cried again. I couldn't explain the mix emotions I had. It was like somethin' hit my heart. It was really pointed. I felt the pain. I hope it was just a dream but it didn't. It was real. It happened already. I get up and get my phone. I saw a lot of post from my classmates during receiving awards. I cried again. I immediately off my phone. I couldn't bear it. I was really lonely. I felt like a biggest burdens into myself. A flying questions in front of me but I don't know. I didn't understand. Loneliness kills me. *"Mom, Dad where are you?"*

________________________ `Thank you so much. I hope I give you some thoughts with this article of mine.` `God bless everyone. Stay safe always.` `-JRamona20 💜`

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