What's up? Imma share something,

Two workmates of mine, with whom I became slightly close, let's call them Shi and En (lovers) visited my place without messaging me beforehand that they are coming over, they just knocked on my room and I got surprised by their sudden visit, I found it rude but I just smiled and asked them, "Oh, you guys are here... what's up? what are you doing here"

They said "Nothing, we just want to come over" In my mind, I'm like "Without my permission?" I know they don't just come over without any business at all, but I just let it be and offered dinner... then after finishing our dinner as we sat down on the couch to watch a random movie on Netflix, I saw Shi nudge En, then En asked me "JM, you offered shi a cabinet and drawer?" and in my mind, I'm like "So that's why they are here" they could have just messaged me about it so I would know and not get surprised.

I already have the conclusion why they didn't message me, because of what happened 3 days before the sudden visit.

They wanted to come over but I refused and said I am busy doing something Important and maybe next time because I thought they wanted to drink alcohol.

I was doing my work and I didn't wanna ruin my momentum at that time,

their message was,

"Punta kami jan" (we are coming over)

Instead of,

"Pwede kami pumunta jan?" (Can we come over?)

Which one's more polite? the second one right? And that's how you ask a person if you need to go to their place. I find the first message too strong, It's like there's no respect at all.

like can you say it politely, asking if you are allowed, instead of just saying you're coming over without a reason?

That's why I rejected them that day. Still, Even if they thought I might refuse them again, they should state the reason.

After giving them the cabinet and shelves they said,

"Thank you JM alis na kami, mag iinom tayo next time ha, baka sabhin mo busy kana naman"

Thank you JM we're leaving, let's drink next time, i hope you won't say you are busy again"

I replied "Yes, let's just schedule a time, set a date, or something because there are times I get busy and I want to concentrate on work and ...

when I was explaining more and more In my mind I was like, "Wait, I don't have to explain myself how busy I am right? like If I'm busy, I'm really busy, It's already given and I don't need to explain the details of it. since it's my business

Like what if I'm busy because I don't want to talk to anyone or I want my isolation, etc., would I explain that to them?"

anyways,

Even my best friends would ask permission with a reason before coming over to my house and they as my close friends of mine, can't say it?..

I'm just the kind of person to ask someone's permission first before doing something to not be rude which I hope it's done the same to me,

So we set the date of our drinking session, and I said "Yeah sure come over like around 6 pm in the evening" and then Shi suddenly said "We will be here at 1 pm" in a commanding tone... like ugh, shouldn't I be the one to decide? then as someone who can't say no I just said "Yeah okay if that works for you"

Then I was waiting for them yesterday around 1 pm but they didn't come over, instead, they moved it to this day, yeah I was expecting them, but at the same time not, but normally I don't like moving off schedules since I'm setting what I'm doing for a day... but to finish the drinking session then so be it. like para, matapos na hahaha

also I've been noticing a different kind of attitude from Shi towards me, especially at work, but that'll be for the next article ~ ciao!

THANKS FOR READING!