We all have our opinions on various matters, even if we don’t necessarily air them, they are there...
We all have people we care deeply about...
We all have people we value and respect - not necessarily someone we are particularly close to, but someone who commands our respect and attention...
So what happens when those opinion differ?
Would you change your mind and follow their opinions? Or will you stand your ground? How will you explain to this person the value of your opinion or would you chose to just adapt his or her opinion and discard your own?
The big thing to consider I think is, how we value our opinion plus our knowledge with regards to the matter at hand. Sometimes we feel attacked when our opinion is questioned. We feel like the other person is attacking us personally when he or she disregards our opinion. We feel like we should defend ourselves from this attack and put our selves on the defensive or worse yet on the offense and be on the attack even when the other party hasn’t yet even pulled out his gun.
So, how do we prevent this? Or should we?
Indeed, if we want peace in our hearts then we should learn to fight our battles and learn to equip ourselves so that we can learn to defend our opinions and know that we are on the right side, if that will be the case. Some ideas tend to be something that doesn’t pick a right or a wrong, there are no wrong answers just the right perception perhaps or the right way at looking at it.
First, we should really know something about the topic or idea we are forming an opinion on. So that when we are questioned with regards to the matter, we can form the right justification.
Second, find within ourselves the reason why we formed that particular opinion. Is the opinion we formed based solely on how our lives are currently? That the opinion is because of how we are living our lives, how the idea would apply to our lives? Or would it encompass everyone.... that the opinion formed will be the same regardless of who is living it.
Third, we might also want to consider the other parties opinion. Find out the cons of your opinion and the pros of theirs. Find out why they are forming that particular opinion. You might be surprised that the opinion was based in the way you did base your opinion on as well. What??? I mean, on the 2nd part I said that our opinion might be based on how the idea will apply to us. The other party might have based their opinion on how the idea will apply to their lives and because we live different lives, we all think differently, place importance on different things, we might find ourselves understanding where the other person is coming from.
In the end, when our opinion differs, perhaps it might be a good thing to consider and take into account the other person’s point of view and see the idea in a different light. You might not need to fight each other for our opinion to be the right one. You might not need to fold and accept the other’s opinion as right. You might rather decide to respect the other’s opinion and accept that there might be another view equally right as yours. You can “Agree to disagree” and leave it at that, rather than tear each other apart jostling to be right when you can actually be equally right.
The only way to do this, is to critically analyze that other point of view, the reason why this person chose that particular point of view and at the very least, try to understand why the person thinks that particular way. You don’t need to change their mind, you don’t need to change yours but at least come to an understanding (even on our own) why that opinion matters and let it go.
