While I am waiting for the Christmas, I wrote down all the things I remember that happened this year. It's like recalling and thinking about all the good and bad things this year. Life is not about rainbows and butterflies always in short life is not perfect. It has flaws, it has its own mistakes and it is simply it is. I just cannot believe that this year would be different as you see, Covid-19 almost changed everything but I did not take that as negative one and a way to think that life is hopeless. I know that life still has bright sides, only if you look at it. For people who chose to refuse and not look at it, they woud never see the good side of life which someone hits me in my part.
So way back in writing what I can remember this year, I was hanged. I cannot remember all of them or only a little bit is fresh to my mind. Maybe because there is no so much to recall this year since we are in quarantine and we stayed indoors so much that we cannot say there are "memories." The last time it was fresher to me is the memory I had with my classmates when we were having fun and overtime parties, it was hell lit and who couldn't remember it, it was memorable so of course it has a long lasting memory in my mind. It was March the last time I can say my life is active and coloful, simply because I met my friends and classmates and constant memories are added everyday so what you gonna feel is, it's a memorable and unforgettable day.
But in this quarantine, months are like days to me honestly. I cannot even believed that next year is just like gonna be a next week of today and funny right. Well it happens to so many which I don't fear about feeling towards myself that months aren't months for me. To add the things that add me joy even in this new normal, well it's my cats. I loved to hugged them and kissed them but some dog lovers won't relate simply because they're not into cats and I respect it. I love cats ever since I was young so I can say it's in my personality and in my soul to take care of them and love them all. I have five of them but one died so it was sounds devastated knowing that cat won't make it for Christmas, so I'm really sad for the other cat I had lost. The cat that I had long time ago doesn't want to go home anymore so I am left with three only and this three and I am taking care of them not to lose them anymore. It's hard to lose pets, they are your companions and they're part of your life so you can call them your family because they are. I bought them collars as a gift for Christmas and I hope my cats would like and that they wouldn't destroy it just because they're not used of it as what happens before when I put a tie to their neck or maybe the tie doesn't sound and feel pretty good for them so yeah can't help with it.
Honestly my quarantine life is boring like same cycle everyday at home and facing the screen and phone. I even quit social media because I feel like I'm not doing good enough or that I am sick of people ranting anywhere, complaining everywhere and so on. So what I did I focus on building my hobbies. At least I had something good that I did. Seriously, I took quarantine as the opportunity to be productive and it's hard to set goals that time. Procrastiantion and anxiety, they ate my enemies and make me hard to do what I wanted to do.
So this Christmas, I wanted to be honest that my emotions and mental health weren't good these quarantine and I felt proud opening it up and cheers to myself for believing that it's just a phase and it won't last. Well, I have so many things to look forward when the pandemic is over and when our lives and everything will go back to normal. It means we need to face and fight for the real life and pandemic has made everything sounds like virtual. Like the education, it was virtual and it's hard to learn on screen. I was convinced that physical interaction are a lot better and a whole different one that conducting online classes. Seriously it made a great difference and change. Well, when life will go back to normal, I wanted to be a better and adaptable person this time. It's not bad to change yourself a little bit and see it in a better way, I mean aren't you impressed to see yourself doing good and improving when no was watching because for me it's a great achievement already.
