Why I can promise myslef anything?

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Avatar for Iamjohn
2 years ago

No specific future goals, no self-development plan, no materialistic thoughts.

I sometimes think about where I'm going?

I'm a family man, I have to arrange bread and butter, pay the bills of my family, take care of thousand things. My time is occupied by so many things. But when I get time, I start to think, why there's no promise, like no future plan. Just living my life the way it is. It sometimes makes me feel guilty, empty. Coz I didn't have done much for self-development, spiritual development, I don't invest much in myself. Rather just do the regular everyday stuff.

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Do some family guys are like this? Do some men are like this in general? Or I'm the one who is lagging behind everything.

I mean, in my head I have a plan to build/buy a house in the next few years, a nice car maybe. But the next day I feel like, whatever is going on that's okay. I can't push myself anymore.

Maybe I'm too lazy to get something. Maybe I'm spoiled from my childhood so can't work much.

Like, yesterday I thought I would write a whole series on NFTs. Today I'm not feeling like writing that anymore - the second part. There are thoughts in my mind about that but I don't feel the motivation anymore.

There was no promise from myself actually.

I'm this way from the very beginning. Coz my friends, family, my wife; everyone complains about this. I can't make any promises. I do put effort, I do make others happy. But in terms of 'achievement', I'm like lagging.

I came to a conclusion that I'm not an achiever but a regular family guy, nothing special. I even thought that this mindset is the real culprit that doesn't help me to progress. But then, again I feel lazy and spoil another day.

It's not like I don't do anything. It is also not like that I do party, have spoiled friends, or anything. I have a regular day job, I earn something from crypto too. I do some trading here and there. But that's all. When I see others, I feel frustrated that I'm not an achiever.

I'm like the lazy guy sitting behind, spending my life, not adding much value.

Why I'm like this? Do you have the answer? Is there anyone who is also in the same boat?

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