Your lover is not your competitor

Life survival is about competence, people are so busy getting skills and being ahead of anyone. It makes us feel left behind despite accepting pieces of training and lessons like we never enough. We always want more despite having a full plate. Aren't you tired of it?

See in midst of a chaotic world your partner is your solace. That person is your home and that's the person you can show your child-like side. No child wants to go home in a chaotic home, remember that. Never look at your partner as someone you need to surpass, aren't you had enough with the world? Your partner should be your peace, protect it. Clap at your partner's achievements and be with him in his dark moments. The relationship is not a contest to who gives more, or who shows less interest and affection.

I disagree with what they say that it challenges them when their partner is greater than them but you see, we have been in so many competitions. Aren't you tired of competing? Then, aren't we fulfilling gaps in relationships not count what are the shortages? See, love is not a competition, and if you love -be ready to clap for others, and if it's your time clap to others still.

When should we realize that love is not competition, should we lose first the person for us to realize that it's not always about counting gifts but rather being sufficient. See, our generation longs for love that is unconditional so don't put conditions when you love. Stop making your partners feel they have a weekly quota to achieve, and they should always give something in return.

When you love, just love the person and don't put dog collars on them. When you love a person let them have the freedom to grow individually and you should be open about how they accept and receive love.

Everyone gives and receives love in different ways so be ready for whatever comes ahead. The real battle is being flexible to what type of love language your significant others have. Be reminded that love without peace is never love. Numbers of gifts and photos uploaded in social media is not an evident of true love, there will always be lapses and shortcomings, there will always bad days and misunderstanding , and there will always room for improvement.

I hope you don't leave your significant others just because you think you gave more than him or her. You may have hundreds and they gave you only tens, but what if that's the only thing they have and they gave it all to you.

-Writer Jo

PS: Sorry for weeks I was not able to write, I got busy these days.