Children Are Not Insurances

The toxic culture I can see is making children insurance for parents. I am sure many will be opposed to this, and call this ungrateful and rebellious. But with the high percentage of teenage pregnancy not just in my country but in most parts of the globe, it is very selfish to make a decision out of impulsive emotion. I also believe this topic is not only limited to teenagers but goes beyond.

Children are not insurance or the continuation of your dream. Raising a child is expensive, and a child is never a solution for a dying marriage. A child takes place in the world, as soon as the child is born he/she has his/her own space, rights, and will. Who are you dictate what or who he will be? Should a parent nurture a child and not enslave them by their ideology and self-interest?

You might call this ungrateful and hate me while you read this. But have you read about articles on poverty? Have you watched children suffer on the street? Have you observed the eldest sibling giving up his/her dream for his/her family? Have you met a college student who has three jobs to attend every day? Why does the eldest always suffer? Why do the children suffer in the first place?

The start of life is never the birth, the start of life is when you finally get free of being choked by responsibilities and consequences of actions you have never done. I am talking about the importance of having an "OWN" which parents should give to their children. It's true that being born poor is never a sin, but someone should take accountability for children who stand as parents to their siblings.

It's selfish to get a child just because you got pressured by your toxic family members that keep on telling you to have one because of your age. It is selfish to get a child because you don't want your lover to leave you. It is selfish to get a child because you feel you are not family. It is selfish to get a child when you are not financially stable. It is selfish to pressure your children about the dream you failed to attain.

If you want to get a child because of those things, better to be a blessed single, you will only wreck that child's life.

To be clear, I am not in favor of abortion in any context. If you are not ready to be a parent mentally, financially, spiritually, and maturely never have a child. Bare this in mind that a child will grow and become an adult who will take a role in society and you play a great role in their development. Always bear in mind what you can contribute to that child's life rather than seeking your own interest.

To parents, I am not in the right place to teach you a lesson but as a daughter, I have the right to speak about these things. The pressure you put on your children's heads is unbearable and not because they can survive you will let them suffer, it's never a form of love when you passed on your responsibility as a parent to your child.

To daughters and sons, I am not in a place to say I know how much you have gone through because we are in a different context but all I can say is, it's never selfish to choose our dream and it's never selfish to tell how much tired we are. No one can tell when we got tired and when we are not because no had worn the shoes we always wear.

-WriterJo