Me: -MOOOOM SOMEONE LOOKING FOR YOU. My mom: -Who is? Me: I don't know, an old lady. The lady:
@Hibernum in May 2021
When you are stressed and your cat knows it. Cuando estas estresado y tu gato lo sabe. -Miau. -Si, ya se...
How they lose the dog /// The photo they upload to find it
"The sea." "The sky." "Mashed potatoes."
*Someone 1 year younger than me that tell me his problems.* Me: -Ay this kids of now days.
-How is that the call centers are always hiring? -Every time a bee dies left a vacancy.
When you forgot you have homework for tomorrow. Cuando te olvidas que tenes tarea para mañana. -Hey mom, don't you want to play to do a model of the solar system with names for tomorrow?
"There is not bad work... the bad is to have to work."
-You should be studying! -Why don't you find a job or something? -Hmm, it's ok, dad. -That's enough, i can't do it anymore! -Soon, dad. -Yes, done. -That's my son. -Victory! -I knew he would success.
-Dude we meet at 5, right? -Yes, at 5. *My friend at 6.*
"When your girl ask you if you are the only dummy of your age that still play games." -Musketeers
When you are short but no one cares about it. Cuando eres bajito pero a nadie le importa. "Quiet assholes that i am aquaman."
-I don't want go out of my bed. -It is warm and comfortable. -And outside of my bed the world is a horrible place.
"No matter the age you have, if you meet your primary school teacher you say HI TEACHER."
Government: -You have to work from home. The ones of the zoo:
"Ohh but your majesty wanted to be nosy while i was cutting onion."
*Thinking in the death of the humans have human form, it is easy to imagine each living thing has their own death with their form.* *Even the plants.* -Noooo! -No, it is too soon! -I didn't even have time to flower for first time. -I'm sorry, someone did forget to water you for too long time. X.X
*Food detected.* O_O! *Comida detectada.* O_O!
"In this profile we love the animals and we hate the goverment."
When it wants care /// When you want to give it care
-This job is the death! -Yes, but in 1000 years the people will recognize your work and abilities. -Without doubts it was built by aliens.
Just in case you want to sing in the bathroom. Solo por si acaso quieres cantar en el baño.
"Tip of life: Never say you are bored in front of your mom."
My family without keys screaming that i open the door //// Me: *Sleeping* Zzz
When i write something wrong rapidly i put "or how ever it writes" to let know people, i know about my ignorance.
"Be careful with my wife, the dog does nothing."
-This girls? -Aren't they our cousins? -Distant, distant.
"When there is a deep angry inside, but you have to be kind because you are at the work."
Cheems /// Cheems Oreo
-I want to share something with you. -The three phrases that will help you in life. -Number one: Cover me. -Number two: Oh, good idea, boss! -Number three: It was like that when i did come. -Hey that i liked.
The destiny You --- Me
Mushrooms! Mushrooms everywhere O_O! Hongos! Hongos por todas partes O_O!
-Are you jelous? -No. *Me inside.*
"My big toe when i use a broken sock."
"Es una laptop hasta que se convierte en calentador para gatos."
-Hey. -How are you? *Skip Intro* -Hahahaha. -Can you pass me the homework?
-I recycle glass. -I recycle paper. -I recycle plastics. -I recycle the same negative thoughts again and again.
*Did you know people judge you by your publications?* Me: -I don't care!
"We offer job for someone young and with 20 years old of experience." The employee getting ready for the job:
When you tried the beer for first time! Cuando probaste la cerveza por primera vez!
"I been doing the homework for 4 hours and i only put the title hahaha."
"Trabajos importantes de los gatos." "Verificador de gravedad."
-Look, a vacancy for someone without experience. -Where?
Cuando un perro se porto mal //// Cuando un gato se porto mal
"When your teacher ask you how did you reach that answer without follow the process." -Look dude, the mind is too powerful.
When you have to complete the sentences but... Cuando tienes que completar las oraciones pero... -Disculpe, cuando cuesta esta mierda? -Sale $35.
"My boss looking for me at the job." Me:
"No hagas preguntas. Soy una planta."
"Bueno, esta hecho. Qué sigue?"
-Go, you are free! -I'm an earth turtle you dummy!
"When you get blocked while you were still writing."
"When dawns fresh and you remember the lovers of the summer."
The treasure is not always the same for everyone! El tesoro no es siempre el mismo para todos!
-Last night i did dream i was getting really drunk. -Today i'm making it true. -Don't surrender, fight for your dreams.
That's indeed how you do marketing! Así es sin dudas como haces marketing! Price: $100 Shipping: $20 /// Price: $120 Shipping: Free
Do we take care of your motorcycle? Cuidamos tu moto?
When a stranger ask me my last name // But i give him the last name of my brother
Psychologist: The catmist of steel don't exist. The catmist of steel: (Reference: Fullmetal Alchemist)
"When you leave the things for tomorrow but it is already tomorrow."
When you have a bad day and someone ask you something: Cuando tienes un mal día y alguien te pregunta algo: -What you doing, friend? -First: I'm not your friend. -Second: Who are you? -And Third: You don't care!
I believe it is close enough right? :P Yo creo que esta bastante cerca no? :P
"I did turn into my own Tamagotchi, the only thing i do is try to not die."
-The mondays are the worst. I hate mondays. -You don't hate mondays. You hate your work. -.... -Great, now i hate all the days of the week.
-My dreams were gonne years ago. -How many years ago? -How old are you?
My mom: -It was an ugly thunder. Me, taking the clothes from the roof...
People: -The rockers are satanic and violent. The rockers:
-Odio esta maldita computadora! Hay demasiado lag! Te odio muchísimo! Voy a comprar una nueva PC! -Es-estaba tratando de hacer lo mejor. Q.Q *Se va* -Solo bromeaba, aquí esta una mejora.
-I'm about to have flu. -Booo. -Take something. -Yipes, i'm on it. -But not that!
-Hey, i did ask you for a canvas square of 70x50cm and you give me a rectangular one. -Give me my money back!!! O_O!
"Me, looking how my mom is washing the plates she told me to wash."
"Me, while i talk by phone."
I didn't get it clear, who bited to who? "Neighbors, good morning, the owner of this animal just bited to an old lady of the third age."
-Hey, it is already the mother day, what we give to her? -Shame and sorrow.
-I was about to tell a joke about the minimum salary. -And what happened? -Nothing left.
-There is a giant scorpion on the wall. -It is not more there. -It is not more there!
-Get back Jake, my manual say it is very dangerous. -Mom, your manual is a pile of crap, look what i can do... -Take it!
"V of Vrother." The Warrior: -I will revenge the death of my brother! Who is with me? The Archer: -Count with my bow. The dwarf: -...And with my axe. The Necromancer: -...And with your brother.
"When you will expose about the responsibility and you forget the cardboard."
Hmmm O_O! I swear it was a statue! Mmm O_O! Te juro que era una estatua!
"The young ones are the future." Me, without know if my pants are humid or cold:
-Take it, for a wine. -I can't accept it. -But you deserve it.
"Encontrando a mi crush, en mi imaginación." "Encontrando a mi crush, en la vida real." -Hola :) -Chau :)
The weather will not win me. El clima no me va a ganar.
"When you adopt your first cat."
18 years old: You get annoyed by places without people. 25 years old: You get annoyed by places with too much people. 30 years old: The people annoy you.
-Heeeeey. -Daaaad. *-* -I don't lend the car, i don't have money and i don't give permission. -What do you need?
-Why did you get interest on our company? -Because you looking for employees. -And what can you contribute to our company? -A new employee.
Things that i would love with this cold weather... -Netflix. -Coffee. -My bed. -Get retired.
"When you have no where hold in the bus." "The guy who check the tickets."
-Oh, Finn. -Jum! Jum! :) -What? -Jeealous? -Shut up.
-Esta bien mama, es hora de leer tus hojas de té. -Ahí va, cariño. *Consigue un trabajo.* -Bueno, qué significa eso?
-I will go to take a shower! -Finally. -Thanks God. -You did have to say "Let me see".
"Me, thinking i did fix my life only because i did order and clean my room."
"It is strange how they check the temperature in this neighborhood."
She: -For sure he is thinking in someone else. He: -If i pregnant my girlfriend in the car, does the insurance covers it?
-Look i'm beautiful. -Yees. -You look like Pou. ///// Reference: Pou Game Referencia: Juego Pou https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=me.pou.app
-Oh no! -Calm, it's ok. -The souls doesn't get hurt in here. -For that it's the life in the earth.
Nobody: "The guy who carry all the books in his bag because he doesn't know the schedule."
"The idea in my head." ///// "When i try to explain it."
*The timids in person.* *The timids when they are alone.* *The timids in internet.* *The timids in their imagination.*
Just in case you are hungry at 3 AM. Solo por si tienes hambre a las 3 AM.
-Dear, are you angry? -No. -Then marry me. *Ring* -Put the finger.
11:23 -Sorry i fell asleep. 11:24 -Don't worry, what are you doing? 11:25 *Sleeping* Zzz
-Do your questions students. -Why the boil water softens a potato but hardens an egg?
-How do you see yourself in few years? Me:
"Not even the best laboratory will find the chemistry that is between you and me."
-The cats absorb the bad energies of the house. The cat of my house:
"The next time better i invite her to eat something."
-You can feel like home. -Ok.
I think this cat has a mission for me. Creo que este gato tiene una misión para mi.
When the cats has more social life than you. Cuando los gatos tienen mas vida social que vos.
Woman: *Throw an indirect* Men 3 years later:
"Architects looking for lands to build a primary school." -No. -No. -No. -Perfect.
-You will not go out. -*Let her go.* -Do what Chayanne say mom. -Ok but only a little.
-I don't want you to bring more cats to the house. -Ok, but, can i bring a turtle? -Well, a turtle it's fine.
"Prohibited ask many questions, thanks!"
"Pyramids before." "Pyramids now." -Wanna be your own boss and win lots of money?
"Me, working and sharing memes at the same time."
"Magic dusts to give you financial and emotional stability."
When use a mask is too much for you. Cuando usar una mascara es demasiado para vos.
*I buy a lamp of Dory to not have fear at the night.* The lamp of Dory turned on:
-Hi mom. -Hi son. -What happened? -Today i have an exam. -And did you study? -Yes. -Look Yamil if you fail forget i'm your mother. -Ok. -Son how was your exam? -Who are you?
-Look dear, what beautiful nails. -Look this shirt so perfect.
Sleep 2 hours ----- Sleep 13 hours ----------*Wake up tired*----------
"Confirm me if we all are strange, we want do nothing and we tired all the time."
"And do you use glasses for fashion or they have graduation?" Me:
-This is the cutest thing i have created. -...but it is shame that no one will be able... -...to touch its belly.
"My TV watching how i turn it on and i start watching the cellphone."
-Let's do a challenge of who sleep more. -Clearly i will win. -But there is no way to show it. -Then come and we slept together. *Wonderful move.*
You saw me and you didn't even tell me "Hi." Me:
"When someone talks bad about you but you know worst things about him/her."
Someone: So what's up? Me thinking what to say:
"Jum it is already late and the homework didn't get done by itself, whatever, time to sleep."
It is all about work and dedication. Esto se trata sobre trabajo y dedicación.
Yo cada noche. Me every night. "The alarm will sound in 3 hours and 22 minutes."
"We all have remembers in bicycle." Others: Me:
"The power of reading." The ones that read on PDF:
"When your grandma domains the 3D...!!!"
-Oohh a Shooting Star. -I wish i can reach the end of the month. -Haha.
"I'm everything you looking for but in ugly."
No one: History Channel at midnight:
"Me, trying mint gum with cold water." -It's powerful O_O
Celebrate my birthday ///// Celebrate the birthday of others
Y cuando digan "bájate" ignóralos. Somos gatos.
"Teacher don't get confused, that i give you the homework doesn't meant that i understand you, i could be stupid but never irresponsible."
I will go to check how my plants are growing... Voy a ir a mirar como mis plantas están creciendo...
Ray the cat Favorite beds of your cats Bag paper ----- A T-shirt A box ----- You
-That skirt is too short. -Do you want we to talk about short things? -But it looks great on you.
Know the eels. Electric. Acoustic.
Child care centre "Little Seeds" I think one of the little seeds did fall :P Yo creo que se les cayo una semillita :P
-How cute. -I'm metalhead.
Dame el maíz y nadie saldrá herido. Give me the corn and no one will get hurt.
"There is no time to explain it, get in the pea!"
"The cats can have some mental problems just like their owners." My cat --- Me
-You believe to know everything about me, right Alfred? -I did change your diapers, it's logic that it is like that... Sir!
"Me, after trying to disarm the thief that wanted to take my phone." -Where i am?
Things that didn't explain in class. Teacher. Exam.
-Don't worry, i will take care of you very well because i know one day you will do the same for me. -I'm sorry, but your friend doesn't have insurance. -I don't care what it cost, just do that man get healthy! -Thanks, fish.
The frog without do anything to me --- Me
-Hey, can you keep moving the screen? I need to go up, thanks.
"Signals, that you are a bee." -People judge without know you. -You never leave a friend in hard moments. -You like the nature. -You don't have waist.
-Take it, it's for you. -What is it? -It is a personal ghost, it is specifically made to torment you. -Boo. -Aaaaaaaaaw! So cute! -Boooooo Booooo.
"The ways that my friends follow." -Get marry. -Have kids. -Buy a house. -Study a post-grade. "Me, choosing my ways." -Adopt a cat.
"The cat that is always fighting in the roofs." -It is my obligation to defend the neighborhood.
"The chair was invented in 1880." The people in 1879:
When people ask me if i'm doing diet: Cuando la gente me pregunta si estoy haciendo dieta: "Full diet, i'm slowly leaving the bread."
Me: Hey, do i have to take out my mask? The Dentist:
When people ask me if where i live is cold: Cuando la gente me pregunta si donde vivo hace frió:
-Don't worry, i'm essential. -For who?
"Organizing my finances."
-Es hora de irse. -Vamos. *Internet Explorer no responde.*
Me, taking a bath without preoccupations knowing that i will be late anyways:
2 A.M. -Brain let me sleep. -No, i want you to keep awake. 7 A.M. -Brain let me wake up. -No, now i want you to sleep.
-He was a good man and my best friend. -God, i will miss you so much... -For you, Greg.
-Hola, me gustaría hablar con el dueño de la casa...
"When you die but your cats don't stop asking for food at 3 AM."
"A concretesaurious eating barres of steel."
-And aren't you bored to live alone? -Who say i live alone?
Mi crush, quiero un helado. Yo: My crush, i want an ice cream. Me:
The cockroach without do nothing // Me: Ahhhhhhh
-Ay, it's so cute! -Yes, it's so cute, right? -Do you want to hold it? -For sure! -? -Miau!
"Como dibujar un gato con la palabra cat." Cat = gato
The teacher: -You don't worry, if at the being your painting is not so good, not everyone is Picasso. Picasso:
Everytime that you see a ❤️ of me in your publications, i want you to imagine me like this:
The teacher: -Before go, anyone has a question or everything is clear? Me, who was sleeping the whole class: -Everything is clear teacher, have a good day, bye.
"Those Rottweilers that they sold me are very strange."
"I love you Karen."
"Me, trying to be the lady of the plants."
I suffer an accident. My friend...: -Are you ok? -Yes, look how i bleed of happiness.
"Sometimes i get surprised how i turn my homework of 10 minutes into one of 5 hours."
The plant in the vivarium /// The plant in your house
Bus mom, teaching his son the way, so he can do it later by himself. The nature is so wonderful. -It's beautiful....
"It is like that when you go to the bathroom without your cell phone."
-Why the humans submerge in oxide of hydrogen? -Because it is fun. -Fun? -FUUUN!
She: *Probably he is thinking in another woman.* He: *My dog understand some human words, i don't understand any of its barkings, maybe it is smarter than me.*
Tip of the day: Well, nothing because it is already the night haha.
My friends telling that i'm the best to keep secrets. /// Me, forgetting everything they tell me.
Data: Even if she did have a childhood with few parental love, Tigresa did show to have mother instinct. -She is fattening it to eat it.
-Mom, there's a monster under of my bed. -I told you a thousand times that you stop calling like that to your brother.
*Dishwashing* *Wash pots*