Session IV: Areas of Adjustment

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Responsibilities within and outside the home

Their concepts of the role of husband and of wife should indicate what each considers his responsibility and that of his mate to be. Further discussion of the subject, however, enables agreement to be reached on any divergent point. If the husband expects his wife to be housekeeper and cook primarily, then he should expect to provide for the economic needs of the home. If the wife is expected to work and contribute to economic support, then the husband should assume responsibilities within the home.

Work and vocation

By this, the couple should have agreed on whether or not the wife plans to work after marriage. Also, the husband should have made plans concerning his career and the wife should be in agreement with his plans. If a son plans a business career with his father, the future wife should have a clear understanding of the agreement between her husband and his father.

Finances and money management

The budgets will reflect the concepts of each in handling funds. If significant divergences appear, they need to recognize them and reach a common agreement. They should be encouraged to plan carefully the spending if their money, the setting of financial goals, their savings, and provision for unexpected expenses. Gifts to the church, rent, automotive expense, food and clothing, and recreation should be included in the budget. They should be encouraged not to become heavily indebted since undue financial burdens can place strains upon their relationship.

In-laws

The possible problems which might arise in relationships with in-laws have already been discussed briefly with each individual. The man needs to recognize that in marriage his first responsibility is to his wife rather than to his mother or father. The man should continue to respect his parents, but he is to leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife. The woman should see that her parents do not interfere with the marriage. Although both the man and the woman can possibly see weaknesses of the future in-laws, they should be careful not to criticize one another's parents. On the other hand, if in-laws tend to to create problems, the couple should agree together to move far enough away in order to reduce the conflicts; otherwise, serious problems can arise which will hinder the relationship of the couple.

The Birth of Children

By this time, perhaps the man and woman have already discussed the number of children they desire and the time when they plan for them. Children's coming too close together is detrimental to the woman's health. At least two years should elapse between the birth of each child. The number of children should be determined by the desires of the parents and their ability to support them. Not only should parents plan to feed and clothe adequately their children, but they should plan to give them as much education as possible. Innocent children of irresponsible parents suffer the consequences if so many are born into the family that all cannot be properly cared for and educate.

Medical examinations and Marital laws

Some countries require a blood test before a marriage license is issued. The wise couple seeks a complete medical examination before marriage. The bride should see a gynecologist and be thoroughly examined for her forthcoming experiences as a wife and as a mother. The doctor can explain birth control to her and inform her of any disorders that may prevent or make difficult her having children. The husband should be examined by a specialist in internal medicine to determine if any disorders may interfere with his capacity to work or function as a husband and father.

Each government has laws relating to marriage. The officiating Minister should informed the couple concerning the legal the legal requirements for marriage. Also they need to learn about laws regarding joint bank accounts, joint ownership property, the need for a will, and other legal matters.

Any thought?

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Hari

Enjoy...reading..Blessings

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