Missed experience.

Since elementary, I always have the achiever role of our family, which is really good. I always strive of becoming the best among us. I study for hours just to be their favorite child, the achiever child. I get to be praised a LOT, I also getting rewarded by being taken to jollibee(a famous filipino fastfood in the Philippines) or greenwich. Meanwhile, my brother doesn't get to have that privilege (I always tease him that he doesn't what I have) though he can do whatever he wants like playing computer, basketball,tennis whatever he wants. As long as he is safe, my parents will allow him. Then I ask them one day, Why does my brother doesn't have curfew, can play all day, everyday and can do sleepovers. Meanwhile me, I am here staring my notebook reviewing everything over nd over again. My mom answered me "because you're a girl, boys do playing and sports and girls do studying."

But then, junior high came. I was enrolled to a famous school in our city. It's a school for rich people. Though they gave out a lot of scholarships, but unfortunately I wasn't lucky enough to own some scholarship. But, since my dad believed in my intelligence, He actually enrolled me to that school and pays 10,000 every month . Which is a lot of money, that money could've been alloted to our groceries but he sacrificed all that money for me.

I strived hard to be in the list of of students with honor. But, I can't do it. I strived hard, studied for hours but it seems like even if I worked so hard my General average doesn't cooperate, it's always .5 short. Teachers won't give me extra credit because they told me school doesn't allow it. By then, I became really sad and I really questioned my existence. I questioned my intelligence, I became so shy, thinking that my knowledge is not enough. I was always facing my noted and books, not some friends. But, I think I still lack a lot of information. Then, my graduation came instead of receiving congratulations, I've received "you could've done better, you should've been one of the honor students."

Then, right now. I just realized that I've missed so much. I've missed so much of experience, I've missed so much of my younger years. While I was busy reading my books, mocking my brother of not having that privilege of having jollibee for lunch. He was having fun, he was gaining experience. He was gaining friends, meanwhile I am gaining something that can be gained in the long run. I've missed all the fun, I've missed all my childhood because of me being a girl, a girl who've been trapped with my parent's scheme. I've been trapped by the stereotype of girls should study, boys can play all they want. I've missed so much, so much of that fun. I think my brother have experienced almost all things, meanwhile me, I haven't tried night swimming nor road trips with friends. My friends always invites me but I always decline because I was too scared to ask my parents. But, I am doing my best to cope up with those missed experience, I will try everything I want to try. There will be no one stopping me <3

So, people out there. Don't let anyone hinder you from doing anything you want. If you want something then do it, Do everything you want while you still can because time is running fast. Also, if you are a parent please let yourself grow, Don't be too strict of not allowing them. Let them do things they want, don't be a boomer and stop them from growing into a better version of themselves, whether they are a girl or a boy <3 ciao everyone

Photo not mine xoxo.