My First Love

Many years ago, I fell hard in love with a damsel. she was my noonday. She insistently shone, even in the heavy down pour I experienced in my life at that time.

I held on to the future because of her. she was everything in my everything.

Those days, we stole time to see each other. We had a meeting point where familiar eyes were far off.

I still remember the times we spent together; the jokes, the sincerity, the dreams, the encouragement, the smiles.

We always wanted to see or at least speak with each other. You can guess the number of times we spoke each day. Not that we had something important to discuss, she could ask "how I am?" a thousand times, and I won't be bored. Night calls was our norm then. Oh my!

We made sacrifices; painful sacrifices for each other. Our love was thicker than the tropics, red as crimson.

Growing up I started feeling the need to be responsible. You know the man thing! I wanted to cater for my poor family and for her. I wanted to buy her a better future, buttered and stress free.

So I laid down a lot of things, just to reach a state of focus.

We as frequently couldn't go to the park anymore. Our calls reduced. I often then would come home very tired, so night calls was out of the option.

Our love waned down, but somehow I made myself believe, I would always love her and she would never leave. What a lie it was!

The more I sought after self sufficiency, I was subtly consumed and drawn away. I lost touch about many things, including the family and lover I claimed was my drive.

When I finally lost her, I never realize I did. We still spoke but the flames were quenched and our alter wet.

.....

This story is a simple narrative of most of our love life with the Lord Jesus.

I know you still speak with Him, once in a while, but the questions is, "whether you still feel the burning flames anymore?"

Those days, we pleaded for more time. The days of fasting, times of worship, prayers without prayer point. I know you can remember!

The romance at day break, the long talks at night, the promptings and ceaseless worship.

The journey to self sufficiency, has taken away from you the best treasure!

No matter how much you search for self sufficiency in things, wealth and acquisition, sufficiency is only in God.

I know you still speak with Him once in a while, but remember those days! This is the deceit.