I am currently unemployed, having quit my S/W & Web Dev job due to COVID-related health issues. I'm hoping to go full Crypto to earn a living, not go back to an 08:00-18:00 grind (although I'm going to have to for at least a year or two in order to bring in enough fiat to exchange for ATOM, CRO, DAI and USDC).
I'm an unsigned music producer, snarky, white, balding and somewhat woke Anarcho-syndicalist smasher of Patriarchy and general right-wing nonsense.
Seeing as the bio blurb that one is given when setting up a profile doesn't give one much space to do a shameless plug and (in)effectively market oneself, please indulge me in taking at least five minutes of your time to do just that.
If swearing offends you, you might as well stop reading and bugger off right now, you narrow-minded prick.
TL;DR, for Right-Wingers, Spineless Liberals and Centrists
Piss off with your politics and SJW "cancel culture" snowflake white knight shenans and virtue signalling, you pussy-whipped beta cuck soy boy woketard Communist. Just show me the kinky!
Oh really? Well then, off you fuck, you hollowed-out, beshitted and bespittled little Alt-Wrong fucksquib who's incapable of absorbing one single simple fact (the entirety of your life's ambitions) and probably sniffs his own farts! I have high standards and I try to live by my principles (including honesty and integrity), even if this makes life difficult for me. If that offends you, or you find that ridiculous, you can fuck off right now.
As sweet and docile as it may appear, you do not take on the African honey badger (or mistake it for food) and live, because the African honey badger eats cobras for breakfast (being immune to their venom), picks fights with adult lions for sport and will most likely end you. The honey badger does not give a fuck!
Right, now that that unpleasantness is out of the way, we return you to your regularly scheduled fuckery afoot (of which there is much, to be sure). Onward, Buttercup!
Technical Specs
Up until November, I worked as a software/Web developer, using Java (blargh!) and Python (woot!). I am currently waiting for my savings to arrive in my bank account so I can invest them in crypto and try to earn a living off the interest, job hunting part time (including freelancing). The rest of the time, I'm playing silly buggers or exercising pooches. My hobbies include music trivia and creation/production, dabbling in electronics and strategy/puzzle games. I have two dogs, both dachshunds (one smooth-haired and miniature, the other a short-haired Jack Russel cross).
Sadly, my cerebellum and medulla oblongata are not Einsteinian in proportion. However, I posess a Brobdingnagian vocabulary and I get by with being a somewhat barbigerous logophile. I can probably pen you into bed, if you possess a penchant for pornographic poetry posted via PM. 173cm, 60 Kg after a good Christmas. Primal and esurient in the manner of the Lycanthrope. Anarcho-syndicalist supporter of compassionate capitalism/social democracy, not democratic socialism. Inspector of elephants. Demander of shrubberies. 😋 Partially woke intersectional anarcho-feminist. Geeky as all get out. Wild at heart and weird on top. Unmistakably male, but not very masculine (whatever that is).
I will go ham on you for abusive, misogynistic and/or racist behaviour when I find it; I don't care who you are. I am also not afraid to name anyone who is abusive towards me, because I've had enough of other people's BS.
"I can tell already you think I’m the dragon, that would be so like me, but I’m not. I’m not the dragon. I’m not the princess either. Who am I? I'm just a writer. I write things down. I walk through your dreams and invent the future. Sure, I sink the boat of love, but that comes later. And yes, I swallow glass, but that comes later." ⸺ Richard Siken; "Litany in which Certain Things Are Crossed out"; Crush
I'm here to write and be read (and, hopefully, paid for it). The man of your dreams is out there. The odds that I'm him are infinitesimally small. The odds that I'm the man of your nightmares, well, that's a different matter. I have looked my shadow self in the face and stepped through it. I don't like my inner demons and the monsterous side of myself, but I am not afraid of it. I am finally comfortable with it (having been running for nearly two decades). When you walk through the valley of the shadow of Death and call to him, but he comes not to you, very little scares you as you walk elsewhere. Not that I'm advocating anybody try it, but it did give me a wonderful perspective on what's important to me, exactly what I'm scared of and just how full of shit I am. It turns out that I am very, not that I care.
Strunk and White
Do not abuse my kind and polite nature, because I will bite hard. I can be an arsehole of the grandest kind, but I prefer not to act like that.
I value my privacy to the point of paranoia, so I don't usually kiss and tell (but I'm working on that). I won't give you my number or email address unless we meet in person (or intend to). Respect mah authoritah! 😉
I've Got My Spine; I've Got My Orange Crush
I get notified when people start following me. When I do, I go read the profiles of those people to decide if they're welcome. If you don't have a profile picture, haven't written something in your bio, believe in Astrology or that Myers-Briggs BS and feel compelled to let others know, are a spineless liberal/statist (please see above), Union member or otherwise move the needle on my creep-o-meter for any reason, I reserve the right to boot you off my followers list without warning or explanation. Please do not add yourself back; I will block you, with pleasure.
My kink is political. I disrespect all religions equally. America might have been great once, but that was a long time ago. It might even have been a democracy once, but it as sure as hell isn't one now.
Q: Why do I identify as "primal"?
A: Well, it's not a label I'd usually use for myself. I'm more switch tending to Top under usual circumstances. However, the last year has not been "usual circumstances" by any means. This is actually a good thing. I've been single for most of that time. So I'm frustrated, which makes me quite animalistic and ravenous. I'm off my leash, as far as that part of me goes. "Primal" is the best shorthand I have to express a warning to any woman not open to being hunted and eaten by a shark/wolf that she might need to grab a big stick, the hose pipe or a bucket of cold water and shout, "down, boy"! ...
Caveat lector: I probably have no idea what I'm on about. I don't expect you to either.
Small points of contention
I don't like using the word "straight" as a label for myself; I feel it's a loaded and restrictive term, given the associations with "straight and narrow" and "straight-laced" (both of which have religious/puritanical origins), as if I'm completely vanilla or there's something wrong with identifying differently. Unfortunately, "heteroinflexible" is not (yet) a choice on the kink site from which I'm in the process of migrating.
I'm located somewhere in KwaZulu-Natal, South Africa. (If we hit it off, I'll tell you exactly where when the time is right. You might even get my Discord ID or Signal number.)