I miss you.

How does it feel when that very person who brings so many colors to your life disappears suddenly?

It was meant to be a stroll in search of success just as you promised but you somehow ended up going miles away from me, I rested assured that you weren't going anywhere because of the million promises you made to me.

Were your promises never from the heart? I was so stupid to listen with my heart and not my ears. It hurts walking alone not having your hands to hold, I feel terrible when it gets cold at night since the only warmth that takes my cold away is somewhere I don't even know. Sometimes all I want is a hug or cuddling to relieve my stress but I automatically became a drug addict due to your absence.

Where in the world could you have gone?

This is the one question I have asked myself for the past 8 months since you disappeared, you said it wouldn't take long but your memories are what I hold on to now and they are gradually fading away. I can't even predict what's going on with you at your end, my world is torn apart with your absence.

Did you know I shut the doors in my heart and gave you the keys, it has become impossible for me to carry on without you and what do I tell our baby about you? He doesn't have to hear only stories about you, he deserves to feel the love you have always shared with me.

Brittney closed her diary, it looks so old and tattered, it gets soaked with tears whenever she writes out what's running in her mind. It looks like she has been writing the same thing for the past 6 months, her condition worsened psychologically but she was holding up for her baby.

15th of November 2014.

Brittney was abused by her uncle again, she decided to leave the home since no one believed her story. She left with hate in her mind, all men are the same was the only thought in her head and she vowed never to trust any man in her life.

She spent weeks on the street before getting a hawking business but she ran into debt and her sponsor threaten to squeeze the life out of her so she went into hiding but hunger didn't allow hide for long and she was caught.

She was dragged, beaten, and disgraced because of $12. She was rescued by this guy who was an undergraduate in the University close to where the incident happened. He paid even extra for everything and took Britney away from the scene. He took her home, offered her food, she bathed for the first time in three days, got a new pair of clothes and she was very happy.

She was grateful and begged for some cash as she planned to leave, Tony confused her to stay but she refused. He gave her money and she went out without having a destination in mind.

It was very dark outside so she sat down at the entrance of the house, Tony discovered she hasn't left when he went to shut the gate about 2 hours later. He noticed someone was there, it became Brittney immediately he switched his torch on.

He went and sat beside her, he knew a lot was going on in her mind so he started a conversation that went on and on till 3 pm. Tony got emotional hearing her story, why would a girl with many dreams lose her parent when she needed them most - those were his last words before checking the time.

He stood up holding her hands, they both went back inside. He allowed her to use the bed while he sat reading since he had papers in the morning, Brittney was scared to sleep at first but she eventually did and Tony was gone when she woke up at noon.

He left a note for her to cook or get some food for herself but she choose to cook even though she wasn't sure about what he wanted with her but she felt safe and was with him for about 3 weeks. Tony and his dad had a good relationship and he didn't hesitate to tell him about her after a few weeks of staying together.

He was angry at first but agreed to help her at the end, she was introduced to the family and they asked what she wanted. Brittney choose to go back to school so that she could build a good future for herself. Her wish was fulfilled but in a different school because they didn't want any distraction for their son but a day wouldn't go by without them communicating.

They started growing feelings and ended up falling in love, it happened to be Tony's first relationship but did well in making her happy, they were both happy. They graduated with two years intervals since Tony studied medicine and he was almost done before Brittney got admission, the family saw everything and weren't against their coming together as a couple.

They got married and a few months later, Tony got an offer to work abroad. It was a good one but Britney was yet to conceive which gave them concern and the documents only covered Tony traveling meaning she had to stay behind. It was a tough one but he had to go because such an opportunity comes once in a lifetime.

Tony hasn't been heard from, and what happened to him remains unknown to everyone. Brittney would be having a baby soon, she got pregnant but they weren't aware before Tony left and she hasn't been able to share the good news which hurts her a lot.

She hasn't been herself since then, it looks like his absence affected her psychologically but can Tony be blamed when no one knows what exactly happened to him?

She has tried ending her life but can't so she got a diary to write how she felt every day until he returns or when she was capable to end her life.

Tony's family never left her, they knew her story and wouldn't let her live alone with the pain of not seeing Tony but they believe he is somewhere they don't know.

Three months after the children naming ceremony, Brittney took her diary again.

Dear diary,

I got a set of twins despite the scan saying it was just one, I kept reading meaning to this but everything is pointless. I wish Tony was here to see his boys, they are the perfect replica of him but I believe he is not dead and would be here to help me raise our children.

This might be my last note because I have to focus more on my kids now, I wouldn't want Tony to regret he chose me when he returns. I will miss you but I miss Tony most.

She closed the diary once again with tears, she was lost in thought when one of the twins woke and cried so loud. The noise woke the other and it became a competition of who had the loudest voice, she wept silently as she removed her breast to feed them.

She looked in the babies eyes and said, I miss you sweetheart. I need you, can't do this alone.

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