Have you ever experienced of letting go something important to you? Have you ever let go something part of you? Does the word goodbye slips out of your tongue so easy? Which is more difficult to do? Let go? Or saying goodbye?
For me both words are painful and too much to bear. I am an emotional person. Everyone that I came to cross path with are my treasures. I am an introvert, well sort of. I don't mingle with the crowd. I'd rather set on the side while reading books or doing weird stuff or talking to plants. Talking to plants is one way of relieving my stress. That is why every person I met were like a gem that should be treasured.
So this thought crossed my mind. One of my former colleague at a writing group that was used to be active posted on his timeline tagging me and other friends. Checking if how were we. Then I realized I did not posted any long message for the group ever since we shut it down.
I did not because...
Shutting down the group that was been my home since two thousand eighteen was too painful for me. I cried knowing that we were not able to save our kingdom, our writer's den. We never did bring it back to its glory.
Saying goodbye to the group itself was hard. It feels like the word itself is too hard to throw up. I have a deep attachment to the group. It was a part of my writing journey. No more weekly activities that has a big contribution to my improvement. No more mind blowing war games that helps us to be more creative in writing.
Letting go of the the den that helped me a lot in my writing path was too difficult to accept. It is where I learnt how to write on the spot one hundred word flash fictions. It the group where I take writing more seriously and formally. It is the place that helped me wonder around writing world. It is where I explore new things I did not dared to try. So closing it down is more painful than knowing that my ex-boyfriend cheated when were still together.
The group was called El Escritor's Esfera, it means The Writer's Den, or Kanlungan ng mga Manunulat in Filipino. The group aims to help every writers to improve their writing.
EEE is different from any writing group I joined. Some said that the group was too strict. Hmm, for me no. They might said these because using emojis, stickers, emoticons, and smileys were prohibited inside the group. Wether in group chats or in posting. For this rules, they were okay for. I don't see anything wrong with it. Because the group was promoting proper writing without using jeje words. Moreover I believe that every group has its own rule.
After the first year anniversary of the group the old admins begun to quit. They trusted the EEE on us. We were able to keep the group stable but not too long. The system does not work like how it used to be. When the system won't work everything collapse.
Moreover the foundation that was trusted to us was already unstable. We failed to build a new strong foundation. Problems after problems occured inside. Until we decided to call it quits.
It was a tough decision. It was never an easy action to made but we have to. We knew that letting go was the best option. Because eve us were already falling. We, the system failed to do our responsibility. On the long run we, ourselves were also falling apart inside. We decided to let go and bid goodbye to our den and started pick up ourselves again.
Who knows maybe someday, our kingdom of El Ecritor's Esfera will open again. Maybe? When that time comes, I sure will come back not as a Knight (moderator), not as a Royal (admin) but as an Esfellian/Villien (member).
I am Gem Villa a proud ex-member of El Escritor's Esfera.
I hope you enjoyed this piece.
Thank you for reading my first article.
