Shared parenting: the real challenge behind the legal framework
Joint custody or shared parenting is a child custody arrangement after divorce or separation, in which both parents share their responsibility of raising their children, with equal or close to equal parenting time. It allocates all parental rights and responsibilities involving a minor child in a divorce, separation, or in any action between parents who were never married. This institution is in accordance with article 9.3 of the Convention on the Rights of the Children, which stipulates that “States Parties shall respect the right of the child who is separated from one or both parents to maintain personal relations and direct contact with both parents on a regular basis, except if it is contrary to the child’s best interests.”
Italy, eleven states of the USA, Australia, Belgium, Germany, Spain, Netherlands, Norway, Sweden, and some more countries have already passed the law of Shared Custody, setting a good example for even more countries to adopt it. The rules on custody and visiting rights are unique to each EU country. National laws determine who will have custody, whether custody will be single or shared, who will decide on the child’s education, who will administer the child’s property, etc. However, all EU countries recognize that children have the right to a personal relationship and direct contact with both parents, even if the parents live in different countries.
In all EU countries, a mother automatically has parental responsibility for her child, as does a married father. The rules on whether an unmarried father has these rights and duties differ depending on the country. The reader can find all the information and the differences between national laws in europa.eu. For example, in France, 73% of children with divorced parents live with their mother and visit their father every other weekend. The percentage in Greece reaches 90%.
It is true that shared custody arrangements are unique to each case and their fairness or unfairness cannot be impartial. The reader could understand that it is just and simple – children should see and live with both their parents. Indeed, parents would both enjoy spending time with their children, while having time for their careers. The children would have the whole parental attention, without nannies. While research has found support and evidence for all the advantages of the shared parenting arrangement, there is some criticism based on the attitude of each parent, the logistical coordination, and other environmental factors.
Despite this, the biggest problem is children growing up without both their parents. In France, 200,000 children are affected by divorces each year. As it appears children under shared parenting appear to have lower levels of depression and mental discomfort, fewer attitude problems, reduced use of alcohol and drugs in their future, better cognitive development and physical and dental health, and of course, better relationships with all the members of the family. Furthermore, studies have shown significant benefits to children’s social and psychological health, when they have both their parents equally in their life. According to studies published in the Journal of Family Psychology and Science Daily, daughters close to their fathers are less stressed and less sensitive to emotional changes. Also, children feel lower food insecurity when the father is a resident at their home. Α study by Kinard and Reinherz found that children from two-parent homes have higher scores on verbal reasoning, meaning that they are more likely to graduate high-school and college.
In a 2009 study published by Cornell University, children with divorced but equally involved parents are less likely to engage in sexual relationships at a younger age and more likely to engage in long-lasting relationships. Besides law and couples’ issues, the best strategy is to listen to the children, to care for them, and be always present in their lives. Children deserve to bond with their father and their mother, to make healthy memories with them, and to love them.
