Hello everybody. I often come across such a phenomenon that people do not wish each other's success. Perhaps this is only a vice of the society in which I live. But it seems to me that this is inherent in human nature. Today I decided to reflect on this topic.
In order for you to understand what I mean, I will give a simple example from life. Two Mark and Victor studied together for half of their lives. They graduated from school, technical school and university. They continued to be friends after they graduated. However, when Mark began to build a career and achieve success, Victor began to block his path. He tried in every possible way to prevent Mark from developing.
Victor began inviting Mark to parties, distracting from work. During the gatherings, Vitya tried to force Mark to drink a lot of alcohol. He said that Mark should not spend his life building a career. In simple words - Victor envied his best friend and did not wish him success. As a result, their friendship came to an end, but this can be called a happy ending. Otherwise, Mark could succumb to the influence of his friend and miss the chance to become a successful person.
There are many examples in life when people envy someone else's success will interfere: saying that you will not succeed or will be called a fool, and your idea is a failure. It turns out that in social science this phenomenon is well studied and has a name.
Crab Bucket Theory
The phenomenon of people not wanting each other to be successful is considered the crab mentality or crab bucket theory. Why is it called that? It turns out that crabs are by nature cunning or stupid creatures. Or maybe both at the same time. If you put a crab in a bucket, then alone he can get out of it. But if you put a lot of crabs in a bucket, then they will prevent each other from getting free.
It can be said that the term Crab Mentality is used to describe short-sighted behavior and actions. This behavior is tuned to one life position - "If I am lazy or I can't do it, then you shouldn't be able to do it." Simply put, if one of the society begins to be successful, then he must be prevented. This is done on purpose, but most often unconsciously.
Let me give you one figurative example. When a person quits drinking alcohol, his friends say "you can't do it" or "don't do it because your life will get boring." The same was the case with Victor and Mark, which I wrote about above. That is, crabs are trying to prevent their friend from changing their life. It's the same when you are trying to get a second education, and friends are surprised and say, "Why do you need this?"
In my opinion, some people have a subtle intolerance towards more successful members of society. Notice how many YouTube videos people experience failures are gaining views. For example, they fall or accidentally commit absurdities. People like the fact that others are worse than them and do not like it when there are people who are more successful. I'm not saying that all people are like that, but I know that some of these people are in my environment and there is nothing to be done about it.
Break the mold and don't be a crab
The only way to discourage the crab mentality is to be different. You need to have a goal and strive for it no matter what. You must never give up and be confident in yourself, even if everyone around you tells you not to do it or the famous expression "you will not succeed." People-crabs are around us and will surround us, we can do nothing with this.
There is no point in fighting human nature, but you need to have self-control. We have only one thing to do - to be stronger than a bucket of crabs and climb forward, even if you are pulled back by a lot of people.
I understand that completely isolating yourself from the crab people will not work, but you can do it in a different way. Build your environment of people who sincerely wish you success and support any of your initiatives. There are not many such people, but they are.
