Not every opinion actually matter

Written by Favour Ifeoluwa Olanrewaju ✍️✍️

"I don't have white teeth, so I find it difficult to smile while taking pictures, and even if I do... I won't post it"

"I don't post my pics cause I aren't beautiful/handsome like others, cause I'm not all that photogenic"

"A lot of people are far more beautiful or handsome than I am, how then do you expect me to win a beauty contest?.... Or contest for Mrs or Mr faculty or department?"

"Someone ones said I'm not beautiful enough 🤧"

"How do you expect me to contest for this when this particular person is there?"

"He/she is better than me"

These are comments from people I've hard, about themselves.

Wait.

I'll start with this first, "how many people even have white teeth?"

***************

When I was much younger, I had this very bad insecurity about myself.

No exaggeration, I actually believed I was the ugliest in my class then.

Then I was the youngest in my class.

each time I had a situation to go out together with, any one or two of them... I did really judged myself on the fact that guys approached them far more than they did to me.

I concluded I wasn't pretty afterwards.

The funny thing was that I was so small and young then, far more than them.

I grew up with that, believing I wasn't as pretty as the way normal girl's should. I was cutting my hair too then.

There was this particular day a female classmate legit told me, making hair might not even fit me.

One other occasion, there was harmattan... and I had to put rob on my lips.

I came to the class and she was way too dramatic. Telling me I had to wipe it off that it doesn't suit or look good on me. she said I should never try anything that is related making up or whatever,

She was like.

"Favour wipe this thing off, it doesn't look good on you... lipstick cannot even fit you"

I wiped it, but I never forgot the fact that lipstick, or lipgloss or anything related can never look good on me.

One day, she asked me if a guy ever even asked me out.

I left secondary school with all these mentality.

I entered University with it.

I'm being real here, I really didn't bother much on my dressing, my hair. I like pictures so much but if I want to post, I'll be so concerned, I might even have to ask someone to pick for me.

It was this bad, I really valued the opinion of others to be sure of something.

For the next two thirds of my first semester in hundred level, I did not really mingle with my female coursemates. I felt intimidated.

Even though I talked with few, I admired alot of them... they really are so beautiful, I believed I wasn't anything compared to them.

Then, I was scared to meet people from maybe WhatsApp or Facebook, cause I believed I aren't anywhere near the snapchat pictures I posted. I never posted my normal camera pic then.

To make things worst, I had really much pimples and black spots all over my face. I tried really hard to fight them but gave up afterwards.

And then, I'm this very skinny girl 😂😂🙈

At a point, I got to know I had admirers even with how isolated I was.

The day I got my breakthrough, I read a post about dealing insecurities.

They where just so much and stupid.

Actually everyone is built differently 👌, different style of beauty, different statures, different face shape, different eyes.

Nobody is actually ugly.

You're beautiful when you first admit you are.

Everyone can't look the same, behave the same.

We even have different talents.

I changed.

Now...

I don't need any fucking person to tell me I look good before I know that. I can always look in the mirror and say Favour you are so beautiful.. and that's all.

I decided to always smile, to talk to few more people, greet people, changed my dress style, make good hair.

I don't know where this glow came from, but it came.

I don't know where this radiance came from but it did come.

At point, my coursemates said they never knew I know how to smile.

When you believe no one is better than you... I'm not saying being overly proud, you understand what I'm saying.

Infact, be proud.... be proud of yourself. The proud of your look, be proud of your beauty.

I bet you, no one has that look... it's so unique.

What a fellow female like me can do, why the hell wouldn't I be able to do it better?

Not that you can do everything every other person can do cause we all have our specialities, but... we can do alot of things actually.

My friend worn a contest, my friend that never wanted to smile in his pictures because he doesn't have a white teeth... that doesn't post his picture.

He posted his picture.

He dealt with his insecurities,

I'm happy for him.

Well I'm happier for myself 😋😋

Well I'm skinny, I don't need to feel bad about it... it doesn't make me ugly helooo

and I don't need to hear that from you cause I have a mirror and I know I am.

I still never used a lipstick, till our dinner... I decided to get one.

I used it, I even used a powder.

I wished you saw me that day, I was the most gorgeous creature on that ground😁😁 🤪🤪

You are handsome.

You are beautiful.

Now believe this and deal with those insecurities.

Thanks for reading 🙏🙏