Diopara is an Igbo word which means The First Son. It is the term used to describe the first male child in an Igbo family. He is by birth the second father of the homestead, and takes the place of the father when he is away or has passed on.
It is traditional for him to inherit and manage his father's estate, so he is granted a lot of privileges in readiness for it. .
Typical Igbo hut
The virtue and sensitivity of the position he occupies makes it impossible for him to be unruly or live a basic life like every other normal person . Conscious of the fact that he is not just carrying his own problems but that of every members of his family, he develops this competitive spirit that is absent in every day people, and strive to win even in places where it is ordinarily impossible to do so.
In most homes , they are treated differently. In the olden days, The Diopara was groomed extensively on farming, leadership, sportsmanship, conflict resolution and relevant trainings to make him an all-rounder in managing the homestead.
He was moulded into a machine. These trainings were usually way above his age and transform him to an adult while still trapped in a boy's body.
But a lot of things have changed with modernity. Most of those trainings have been replaced with lot of perks and privileges that make other kids green with envy.
I , for example, grew up living a very tasking life at the expense of my parents and siblings : my demands were endless - and mostly met.
What they will do and get scolded for, I'd do and get away with it, but it never occurred to me that these little waivers were in consideration of what is to come.
Growing up, I have learnt to live the Diopara way. And believe me, this way is not anything similar to the cozy childhood that drew loud whispers and vieled ire. This way can only draw empathy and pity.
I know a lot of people that opted not to go to college so that their younger ones can go to universities.
I know a lot of good men sweating it out so each and every one in the clan can stand on their feet.
I know a lot of men giving it all up so their loved ones can have it and live.
I know these men giving the comfort they don't have so that their loved ones can have it.
These men are the first sons of my world... and the cohesive force behind our thriving cultures.
These men are Igbo men.
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