He Was a Walking Red Flag; She Was Color-Blind (A Whirlwind Romance in Paradise)

Truth be told, I never intended to be in a relationship. Yes, I acted as if I was searching and ready for love, but I knew deep down in my core that I wasn’t prepared to let someone enter my world and share a piece of my life yet.

I’m still in my selfish era – the chapter of my life where I only want to focus on building my goals and achieving my dreams in life. So, I promised myself that I would only be entertaining the thought of being in a committed and long-term relationship when I’m already 25 – the age when the human brain is almost fully developed and matured and the time when I am confident that I’m already ready to let someone come into my life and be as selfless as I can be.

But one solitary night, the restless wanderer within me decided to try out a random dating app with the intention of engaging in serendipitous conversations with some strangers who crossed my virtual path. I did talk to a few of them, and when my enthusiasm for casual chit-chat dwindled, I decided to uninstall the app.

However, there was a voice inside me that made me reinstall it. And on that second try, I met you. Out of all the matches I have made in that application, it was you and your message that immediately caught my attention. I was flattered by that simple praise you sent – maybe you’re already aware of the fact that one easy way to be noticed is by showering a girl with catchy compliments.

We talked for a few hours on the app before you asked for my WhatsApp number. Overlooking the point that you might have malicious intentions, I gave you my number without a second thought. And so we continued talking on that messaging platform.

Because you told me you’re on the app to look for a long-term partner, I was blinded by the idea that maybe you and I could have a chance. I broke my rule of never entertaining foreigners already living in the Philippines because they are mostly the ones who are not entirely genuine with their agendas.

I held on to the hope that our small conversations would lead us to somewhere better than I could imagine, even though I felt I was only fooling myself because I couldn’t feel your sincere motives.

After almost two weeks of consistent chatting at night and driven by my stubbornness and wanting us to work, I informed you that I’m going on a two-week getaway to another safe haven. I’m unsure if sharing that with you was a regrettable choice, but I thought that letting you know would lead us closer to one another.

And so it happened. You took the bait and suggested that you can fly and go there to be closer to my heart. Maybe I was a fool to be easily swayed by that meaningless message, but my longing heart was delighted after reading those six words.

After a few weeks of planning, I flew to my chosen retreat paradise. Right after I landed, I kept you updated on my whereabouts. A couple of days into that trip, I was already setting my mind that I wouldn’t meet you there and that you would turn your back on your words because you said you couldn’t fly yet due to sickness.

But a day later, you sent me your confirmed plane ticket and were already asking me for my opinion about your accommodation. At that moment, I was the happiest, as if I won the grand prize in the lottery, but I was nervous at the same time.

That night, I couldn’t sleep. I was anxious about what could happen and how things would go when we were already in front of each other. But I thought, “What will be, will be,” so I tried to soak them all in.

On September 16, 2023, you came. I found you standing in front of the garden area, and you greeted me with your warm embrace. Not knowing how to react to your sweet gesture, I simply tapped your broad shoulders and proceeded with our day. While walking by your side, I learned to calm myself down and ignored all the doubts running across my mind before this day’s arrival.