Proverbs 16:4
The LORD has made everything for its own purpose, even the wicked for the day of trouble.
Our days has been full of immorality, there are legions of crime that occur as if they were tolerated by everyone. Massive killings were the focus throughout the media and Philippines is one of the countries that suffer in that kind of dilemma, aside from the extra judicial killings our country is also attacked by the terrorists who reluctantly show mercy with the civilians, greediness invades them, a selfish desire to have more than what they have and with that not only the people they had killed, died but also their families, died in a way that they will no longer feel the warmth of their loved ones. The casualties listed in the place of Marawi is too unbearable, the alteration of a beautiful and peaceful place turned into a devastated city. Many people asked, why are these things happening to us? What did we do for us to experience this kind of pain? What happened in our land, the Philippines? Everything was like in a chaos, tangled events that worsens in the same tangled one, simply, a mess. None of us really do know the fathom of why all of these transpire in our country. What we do know is the agony of the now, the reasons we believed is based on what we feel, based on the emotions given by those troubles, but the bible says in Proverbs 16:4 The Lord has made everything for its own purpose, even the wicked for the day of trouble. Lord comprehends every teensy-weensy of your thoughts, your sorrows, your mourning, He also know that you are starting to lose faith in Him along the way. But God has better plans than what we have, He has purpose in everything and in everyone. In Isaiah 55:8, “for my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways”, declares the Lord. He was the one who created everything out from a void, His thoughts are higher than us, an all knowing God. He let us experienced these things for a reason that is also in favor for us, He let Philippines to endure these troubles for a reason that after surpassing all of these, we could get a lesson from it. Proverbs 3:5-6 says, ‘Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths’. We do not know what lies beyond but by trusting and acknowledging Him, sure enough the paths we take will be straightened by Him.
Tag Your Prof.
Teacher’s created the makers of future they are the root of the knowledge that mostly contain by students. Every teacher have different personality that give the students different approach in their studies.
1. The Ruler, they are the teacher that makes the class in martial law they make a lot of precaution that is strictly obey by the student.
2. The Storyteller, he/she makes almost half of the time telling the story of his/her experience about everything under the sun. Sometimes they use it to encourage students to pursue on what they want Sir So.
3. The Killer of dreams, he ruined every ambition of the students he/she tends to realize the student how hard his/her subject.
4. The Unorthodox, they try different ways of teaching their student, they mix different techniques to give new taste on the way they teach
5. The famous, they are the most active teacher in every social medias. They are the most approachable and always make time to their student.
6. The Reporter’s Notebook, they are the teachers that always give the students a chapter to report at the class. They always give the student hard time to research and explain the topic that they give
7. The Pretty Face, they are the teacher that you don’t want to miss or escape. They are the one that you want to listen and give your time.
8. The Perfect, they are the smartest, the coolest and the best teacher that you will experience. They will give you almost all of the consideration because they want you to pass to their subject.
9. The Emotional, they are the student commonly called the “hugotera” they always relate many things about love. They are like broken hearted even there status is happy with someone.
10. The Kage, they are the pillars of the schools they are the experienced one. They always give advises and promising lines to motivate you but sometimes they are the most terror.
Wishing Well
How I wish...
That I can feel you with my arms
How I wish...
That I can see your personal charms
But I can't...
Because I'm just an unknown to your admirable desires
The feeling...
That I know you from a far
The feeling...
That I love you from that far
Is the feeling like reopening a fully wounded scar?
Every day I wish that you care for me
Every day I wish that you love me
But how can it happened if you don't even know me
I cried...
In moments that I realize that dreaming is the only way to be at your side
I cried...
Because I know that every day that I wake up I can't see your beautiful smile
But even though that I know and realize I’m still crying
I'm still crying the fact that I'm still in love with a princess in the story
I'm still crying for the girl that didn't know that I'm existing
But even though I'm crying
I'm still believing that possibilities that we will meet is still be there
I still believe that we will be given a chance to make our own story in our way
The story that is written by our own destiny
The story that will be created by our own journey
That someday I'm with you happily
I'm writing this for the pieces of my heart that I beginning to pick it up
I'm writing this to express my sincerity and apologize
Because I love you and I'm not willing to give it up
I’m willing to be your “Bes”
I’m willing to give you all my best
Because I’m willing to be you’re “bes"
I’m willing to do it no more no less
Just to be with you and remain at rest
I need you more than you need me
I love you but you never love me
Even chemical equations ask me
If I can balance the way you treat me
I hate the timing when we met
When destiny give us enormous threat,
And it never allow us to get,
To know how to start a game of bet
I feel almost everything about you
And I feel nothing without you
But how I wish you feel it to
And say to me the words “I love you”
But I know it will never happened
For that I just want you to know
That "I'm still willing to be your bes"
C.O.C.
Lately I been thinking how far this country can stand to our own people
Lately I been wandering if it is benign or it is malignant for our nation
I been thinking but it always end up to no comments and decision
I wake up this morning and receive a notification
It said that a war has been ended
But I don’t think it was, because all I see is the grudge of those people
The grudge that their heart carry
Through all of the days of their life
And leaves them a fresh wound that only time can heal
Their eyes keeps telling me how they suffer
Their breath keep taunting the cold night breeze
And the fear of death is circulating everywhere
I feel all of their emotions
It hurts me and put me in the coffin
And gives me this chill that scares my body
Then after I've done my things
I received another notification
And it said that terrorist101 is attacking your village
I want to fight but all I can do is watch
And think how I will revenge
And take what he got from me
I want to give back the fear that he had given me
I want to double the murder and make him suffer twice as me
I want to kill him and put his body in his own blood
But someone texted me
He said that "to obtain peace you need to forgive”
And I just stop, and at my back I saw the image of God
I cried and saw the image of our country
I stand and shout not for justice but for humanity
And pray that we obtain the right of our democracy
Kindling Phrases
Every time I make an article, I can’t help but to think about how writing relates to the process of learning. In our life, each of us was once a clean sheet of paper, waiting for a moment to be filled by words. Time will come that we will be able to grow ourselves as a precious book, that one day everyone will uncover.
This feeds my eagerness to do my best, not only in writing, but also in school. I treat every day as an opportunity to enhance the kind of book that I am, because even though I know I have a story to tell, I also knew that it’s still not enough. The world is so vast and as long as I want to fill myself with knowledge, there will not be anything wrong in taking chances.
I have learned that somebody is probably having the biggest chance of his life.
It’s a usual routine for me to browse the news feed of my Facebook account. It’s a real fun seeing a lot of people sharing their thoughts and quotable “hugots” online. But a certain post seemed to catch me in the eye. It was about a son of a farmer who got a scholarship in Harvard. His name was Romnick Blanco, a young book from Bulacan.
Curiosity led me to a page made by him with a title of “I hear my country calling”. This is where he posts updates and dedications for the people who had helped him achieve his education now. One of his posts is an open letter about his journey as a kid, and on how dreaming became his strength and hope.
Reading through his words was like taking a scenic view of his experiences in life. On how he walked for two hours and crossed bridgeless rivers, just to get to school and on how he saw his family and his community, living in hopelessness and despair. On how he had seen education as the way in reaching his dreams and his aim of touching other people’s lives, was like a real-life magic and was indeed, inspiring.
“It takes a village to raise a child,” was one of his quotes in the post. There he thanked all the people and organizations, namely the Green Earth Foundation and the International School Manila, who were behind his current state in education. Now, he was being supported by even more people, who believed in what he also did before, that he can do anything as long as he had faith and goal.
His story will forever be a reminder to me that in our books, the author is also us, and Romnick had filled himself with the right words and letters. I think it is also the time, not just me but for also the people who will be touched by these words, to believe that nothing is impossible with perseverance and indomitable spirit.
To do list
A deafening alarm from my alarm clock awakens me from a deep yet a short sleep. I remembered finishing the last set of huge laundry at 1 AM, making me feel exhausted until now and while finding some reason not to get up, the clock bangs another alarm that made me able to turn it off and besides it would make the kids awake too. I gathered all my will to bail out from the bed and drowsily pave the way to the kitchen. The popping of toasted bread is simultaneous to the continuous crow of the rooster which Aling Nena owns. Bacon, fried rice and toasted breads filled the table with its recently usual arrangement, aligned in the center together with the 2 pairs of spoon and fork, 2 plates and 2 glasses. Though everything seems complete the house still giving an empty ambiance.
“I GTG” Amara, my oldest daughter said after storming out from her room, the reason behind the two sets of plates and utensils is that she told me that she will not eat with us every morning, but wait, what does GTG mean by the way ? “Mom!” little Amie caught my attention, she’s continuously rubbing her eyes as if it would wake up her spirit, not until she saw the bacon on her plate. Her favourite food, I could sense that bacon is what she want for breakfast today, Mother instinct you know. “How’s your sleep Amie?” I asked while putting some rice on her plate because as expected she immediately seated on her chair after knowing the existence of the bacon for breakfast. "It was good; Dad was on my dream I got to see his face again” innocently flashes a big smile. I know, accepting their father’s lost would be difficult and a long term process, were all facing the same dilemma though. A dilemma that make no bones in begetting our most vulnerable days. It’s been a year and a half since he was taken away from us.
Memories is the only thing that make us still moving, fighting and it can surely prove that we’re once a happy and complete family. There are lot of weird things we share together and one of those is cleaning the whole house every Saturday as if it was the most delightful thing to do, trimming grass, washing cars, sweeping the floor, folding the clothes, putting things in order and more, after that day you wouldn’t notice that our house was once a jungle. Eating waffles with honey on top of it every Sunday morning when the breeze is so gentle that putting us asleep is in labelled to our quiet bonds. Another thing we do is watching old movies which were owned by Paul, my husband, when he was a little, Paul is fond of collecting great comedy movies back then, and watching those movies are always making us laughing our lungs out! Every midnight when everyone wasn’t in the mood to sleep, we satisfy ourselves by eating cookies and ice cream while playing board games that usually ends when Amara and Paul just finally won towards me and Amie, they never won in any of our games it’s just that we are too sleepy and let them win. When rainy season came, sipping hot chocolate topped with marshmallows is the best thing to do, aside from sleeping the whole day. Our bond together made me feel assured that whatever happens this family will never be take the count. But there are things that is inevitable. Drastic change of our lives came without notice, without telling us that ‘hey you should’ve to be ready, a catastrophe is approaching’. We found out that Paul have a Stage C Heart failure, his first heart attack is the last. We didn’t know anything about what is going on with him, he didn’t even say a word, and we didn’t even asked. We did not asked because we never saw any symptoms of whatever disease he might have, he’s a healthy living guy, but we learned that it was from a family history, his grandfather died also in a heart failure. His sudden lost was so depressing, but sure he will not be happy if we keep on living in the past, so I chose to move forward.
After making sure the house is locked, I escorted Amie to the nursery school near the Village that is out of way to the office. As I entered the office, Alice welcomed me with a big hug and started bragging her sister’s gift to her from Paris. “OMG! As soon as I saw her holding the paper bag of channel I knew my heart was pumping so fast! It’s like I’m going to see my other half! And when I finally saw wth inside I was still in shook! It’s an original Channel Bag!” Alice with her high-pitched voice and unfamiliar use of words, I don’t even know what’s OMG, wth or that shook she’s saying. Why these people using eccentric words nowadays? I want to be enlighten. In front of our desk, I found the new list of the things we need to be passed today, I wonder when did they start putting a to-do list in that wall. After lunch, Alice got a chance to nag me about how awful I do not know those words, I told her about that, and now I regret it. “You gotta make a to-do list of the things you should know about what’s new! And maybe by that you and Amara will be close again? Ohh! I’m so witty!” and then left me dumbfounded. Could it be true? That night, I convinced myself to do what Alice has said, maybe it’ll work, I have nothing to lose here anyway.
TO-DO LIST, 1. Look for a breakfast that would caught Amara’s attention. So, the next morning I searched on the internet what are the millennial teen agers want for breakfast. I found a site named The Breakfast Club, and saw a photo of a ‘monster’ sandwich with an omelette and some veggies inside formed in a mouth-watering way. Copying its form ate a lot of effort and time, but I think it turned out well when Amara went to the table and took few shots of it. “It’s nice Mom, I gotta post it to IG” she said before heading her way out of the house. Amie, on the other hand is just looking at the sandwich and asked. “Where’s the bacon Mom?” Amara is always like that, it seems like nothing really bad happened to her, I know she really missed her dad but she’s trying to divert her attention to other things to forget him. I wish I could help my daughter.
I didn’t tell Alice that I am doing her suggestion, I didn’t like feeding her ego but I am also thankful for her so I gave her the sandwich, Amara did not eat. “When did you know this kind of food?” I just shrugged, after lunch I’m simply asking her what are the new trends and she asked me to come with her at the mall.
TO-DO LIST, 2. Buy the latest OOTD. “These are what we call Outfit of the Day” and starts to spin around in the different boutiques in the mall. We ended up buying denim shirt and pleated skirt to be tucked in to highlight the waist and roll up the sleeves in a nonchalant way. I placed it in a paper bag together with the flawless low top sneakers, and put it in her table. I also bought Amie a really nice dress and she love it I hope Amara too. Tomorrow morning, I was in shocked when I’ve heard a loud ‘kyaah!’ from Amara’s room, and found out that she really like that ‘OOTD’ when she hugged me so tight. “Mom! Is this for me? I really love it! Where did you bought these?” And I told her where, we also talked about what happened to her day yesterday, I enjoyed it so much that I forgot the open faucet. I shouldn’t let other things interrupt our moment. “I have the list of the words we used nowadays”
TO DO LIST, 3. Ask for the terms they’re using and apply it when you speak. I was completely oblivious while talking to Amara earlier because of the strange words she’s saying like AF, TBH, so I figured out that I need to know their ‘language’ as well to communicate with her easily. “Btw, how much did you spent yesterday at the mall?” Alice suddenly asked. Well, it’s quite big, Amara should not always buy those kind of clothes. It would make her wallet empty a lot. “What does AF means?” trying to change the topic.“Oh! AF basically used as a way to emphasize a concept, here take a look at this, I’ll just submit something to Ms. Alonzo” I took the piece of paper and starts to understand its meanings. When I got home, I saw Amara at the living room while using her phone and keeps on scrolling. “Sup? Does your day spent well?” I asked, feeling nervous for this is my first time uttering those words that’s why ‘sup’ is the first thing that came into my mind. “Tbh Mom, you’re getting weirder everyday but I like it. The struggle is real at school but the street food buffet was so lit!” Street food? She may get some sick by eating those foods besides she has low immunity. “We should try that Mom!” I reluctantly smiled and agree to her request, Amara and Amie stayed at the living room doing their things while I started to think of Amara’s life style, I know she’s skipping meals at her school, or in morning. How would I tell her to stay every morning and eat breakfast with us, without affecting our relationship right now? Bothered, but I still managed to prepare Bicol Express for them as dinner.
The next morning, Amara joined us in breakfast which is quite unusual but I can say a big improvement, she asked if she could sleep at her friend’s house for a group study near at their school, with her pleading eyes, I granted her request. Maybe she need a breather, hanging up with her friends might help.
TO DO LIST, 4. Let her enjoy with her friends, that night only the two of us, Amie and me sleep at the house, Amara did not went home that morning and came at home very late. Amara’s face shows limpness as she directly went at her room. I wonder what happened in their group study. Weeks had passed, the list continues and we get closer than before, we ate at the streets, watched the newest movie, buy new clothes, and always doing the ‘mother and daughter goals’, I am so happy for what relationship we have now, even Amie is felicitous on our situation. Alice suggestion is indeed a big help.
One fine Saturday, while Amie is cheerfully toying her kitchen set at the backyard I received a call from her friends to go at a certain St. Mary Hospital because Amara was run in the Hospital due to unexpected faint while they were at the mall. Different emotions rapidly perceive by my mind and heart, wth happened to her? I unconsciously grab Amie’s hand and my bag and stormed out from the house and tried to get there as fast I ever could. Nothing in my mind is straight it was filled with fear and too much what ifs. As we finally came at the Hospital, I almost lost my breathing when I found her lying at the bed with apparatus attached in her body. It was not just a simple faint; it was freaking heart attack for freaking sake! The doctor said it was from a family history too, inherited by Paul’s side, he also said that Amara is in Stage B Heart failure, her situation was by her lifestyle, her lack of sleeps and eating too much sweets and other foods that are prohibited to the people who have heart failure. When the doctor leaves, I immediately grab her hand, and started crying. I look for my to-do list in my bag, but it is nowhere to be found, I asked Amie if she sees it but she said not, I smiled at her and tried to stop crying because she’s also crying too. A nurse entered the room with Amara’s things and left us right away. I found a paper bag with my name on it, but before I open the bag I found my to-do at Amara’s bag. I flip the pages up into its last and found her hand writing, TO DO LIST, 31 Tell Amara the things she shouldn’t do. Tell her stop being a brat to her Mom. With that, cluster of tears comes out from my eyes. She read it, she wanted to be corrected, and I should’ve done it before. I should’ve tell her to sleep on time, I should’ve tell her not to skip meals, I should’ve tell her to eat healthy foods, eat sweets less. I should’ve take a good care of her. ”M-mom” a wimpish voice escape from her mouth. “I bought you a blouse you really want, I hope you like it” At this point I want to hug her really tight and not let her go. “I’m so sorry Amara, It was my entire fault” “No, Mom it was me who abused my body, I’m so sorry for such a brat to you and Amie, I’m sorry and I hope Dad could forgive me too.” She said between her sobs. After that Amie and Amara fell asleep, I went to the doctor again and discussed the treatments for Amara.
There are things in life that happened which are not in line with what you have planned, things happen unexpectedly, that goes out of your hand, the things we thought we need to do are the things that we shouldn’t.
Screaming Silently
Everyone was at peace
Everyone is blessed
Everyone feels happy
Because they pray everyday
Others stay at house
But most of them go to home
Enjoying families company
Enjoying laughter in every story
They are laughing at one point
Crashing joke full of art
Then one day, fantasy became nightmare
But dreams fall apart
It is because terrorists came
And people need to evacuate
Others went to their far relatives
Others went to some safe places
Schools nearby the city
Became a home for the bakwit
There, they eat and sleep, still terrified
Featuring how the event makes them terrorized
They imagined how helpless they are
When the Maute started to fire
They fire guns without mercy
They fire the city, showing their identity
Before, Marawi City has liberty
Before, people just live simply
Selling of pork is forbidden
Any form of gambling is banned
Will
If there’s a will, there's a way
And that's what people always say
As for the times challenges conquer
The curious minds who wander
Ever since when he is born
A face of inquisitive child he always worn
He wanted to learn for being a successor
Of his grandfather known for as curator
Having this job needs more patience
A thousand of hard work he need to experience
But there's something different in this child
His grandfather said, gentle and mild
His eyes and composure was eager to learn
Different traits from his parents he earned
The passion even it's hard to do
A noble kid he liked to
And the time has come, his ability grown
Yet he didn't change from what he is known
From a kiddo to a man with class
Even his father he surpassed
Handling the museum is the hardest task
Yet even he's tired he suited the mask
Since he dreamed this from the very first place
His willingness to succeed he proved and showcased
May I Go Out
I am walking inside this empty room
Looking for everything except the window to doom
Waiting for someone that going to boom
This misery, inside this room
Hi darkness, can I ask you a question?
Can you live me? And take away my depression
Cause all I want is to succeed in my mission
To live the life, the way to my ambition
Let me go! Let me out!
Please go away, I have no doubt
Live me alone! And take that crowd
Cause I want to shout but there’s no sound
Save me, Oh God!
Believe me I’m not that bad
Help me to unleash this mad
Cause I’m imprisoned on the cell of fraud
Born Leader
It was on the 24th night of August when Ryan's heart was filled with glee and overwhelming gratitude. After two years of his term as president, at last again, his service was receiving recognition. It was when he was called as the Most Outstanding Student Leader in the 2nd SASCO Awards of Cavite State University- Rosario. The night that his heart would reminisce and his mind would always remember.
"Last but definitely not the least, from the Future Hotelier and Restaurateur Student Society, Ryan Christian Mercado Alonzo," he heard as Mr. Bautista called him by name. Standing up from his seat, he began to see the glistening smiles of his fellow officers and listen to the loud clapping of the crowd. And as he walked through the red carpet, he couldn't help but to think about all the things that he had gone through his life to be someone he knew he was born into, to be a leader, with a heart, desire, and compassion.
In the 19 years of his life, Ryan learned to honor the value of family. Born on 17th of June 1998 as the fifth and youngest child of Rolando and Melinda Alonzo, he had always motivated himself to do his best at almost everything that he does. It was his way of repaying the sacrifice and support of his origins.
He was also taught to value the gift of education. He graduated his primary and secondary education at Rosario Elementary School and Rosario National High School. Now, he was currently taking Bachelor of Science in Hotel and Restaurant Management and also a part of the graduating class of the CvSU-Rosario.
Slowly, he took every day as steps in achieving his success. He believed that education would be his weapon in paving the way to his dreams. This was proved by his consistency as a Vice President Lister of the University.
But he knew that education alone would not be enough. He also believed that to be successful in life requires A.S.K. - Attitude, Skills, and Knowledge.
Honing his A.S.K., he became a member of the Task Force on Youth Development Kanluran in their community. He was also a National Certificate II FBS Holder. But one of his greatest accomplishment would surely was to be an officer of F.H.A.R.S.S., from Assistant Treasurer and now President. The organization served as his haven in showcasing and developing his skills, not only as a leader, but also as a person, a son, and a student.
Smile began to form as Ryan stood in the center stage. He looked at the crowd, all might yet humbled, and honored as he received the fruit of his hard work. He looked at the cameraman ready to take a shot, a shot to a man who was born to lead. It was a moment of his life that would never be forgotten.
Preparing the BIG JUAN
Being grateful on what we are has always been a challenge to every Filipino, especially on how history molded the current image of our country. From Spanish to American colonization and even the Japanese occupation, they all constituted on how we are today as a diverse flexible society. As time passes by, we learned that to realize who we really are needs more than just looking back, but also by having a sense of appreciation towards what we have today as Filipinos.
From what we know, Filipinos have values that are intricately made out of heart, love and compassion. We are hospitable, caring and respectful to the elderly. We are family-oriented and smile-loving people. Apart from this we are also cooperative through our bayanihan and true-blooded patriots through our sense of nationalism.
Yet living on the modern era of social awareness, there is also a hurdle that we had to breakthrough ourselves. We all know how bleak our country when it terms to government and politics. As citizens, we have the mission to voice ourselves in our own possible way, be it on social media or journalism, but we shall also keep in mind to be truthful on what we write, post and say.
Indeed, we believe that awakening the intelligence and honing the values of today’s young generation shall be a top priority. As cliché as it may be but truthfully, our youth has always been the hope of the nation, and investing on nurturing their expertise is a wise thing that we can all do as Filipinos. The youth holds the key to the nation’s gateway to better possibilities, and assuring their future is almost like creating brighter Filipinos who are more grateful and compact, in the sense of being whole-heartedly proud to be Pinoy.
Sacrifice for Juan Nation
The true meaning of community service is sacrifice.
I can still remember the days when I promised myself never to exploit environment. My teachers inculcated to my young mind that protecting nature is but everyone’s responsibility. I am aware of what I need to do, but maybe I am influenced by the people in the community who were too rampant in causing harm to our nature.
On 2013, Philippines was visited by one of the most deadliest typhoon in the history. Yolanda damaged millions of Filipino families. In fact, Tacloban is truly a nightmare for every Filipino. It clearly shows how the nature can equally lash out all the mistreatment it has received on the past.
This made me remember my pledge in full detail. Undeniably, it is a serious call for us citizens to make actions and give loyal commitment in caring our community.
Yet after seeing the results of the destruction, I have witnessed the efforts and heroism of different Filipinos to help one another. One of this is the Philippine Navy. This is the first time I saw them in action. They are responsible for conducting rescue and relief operations. I observed their courage and readiness to serve. They are willing to sacrifice their lives just to secure the safety of the community. This move inspires me to do more for the country.
Community service is more of sacrificing our wrong habitual actions and start imprinting good impact.
Undoubtedly if all Filipinos will unite to apply the true meaning of community service, this would build the biggest stage for every Filipino. Hopefully two years from now, this stage would light up and every nation in the world would witness how the Philippines has recovered from the pains of the past to become the best of the future.
Making Life a Masterpiece
For five years, Jacy showered me, the publication and the university with numerous awards. I hope that as he sets foot to another journey, may I be able to help in at least giving him a shot to what he has worked for, all his life.
I can never talk of Jacy’s academic background. He was never in my class. I never handled any of his subjects, but his grades are enough to talk of his diligence as a student.
In lieu to that, allow me to speak of how a young boy relentlessly reached for his dreams. I knew Jacy since his junior year in high school. For one, I have witnessed how great he is a leader, from being his high school’s president, to becoming his Civic Welfare Training Services batch’s president and eventually leading the entire school’s studentry. As a leader, he always makes sure that he has well planned everything. None were delayed, everything accomplished. His ideas were unconventional. He started the gawad parangal in our campus, recognizing outstanding leaders, allowing them to become examples to their subordinates. He has fostered camaraderie towards the university by initiating an annual SASCOlympics event which brings together every organization in the university for a week of learning, fun and growth. He is a prolific leader, earning him praises throughout the university.
But as much as I hope to say that he is a perfect student, I bear witnessed to his emotional battles and how he triumphed over it. Jacy’s dream does not involve most of what he has attained. It has always been about setting the example for his younger siblings and making his parents proud. It was in his first term as my editor-in-chief when I first saw how heavy his burden is and how despite being so firm and reputable, he is highly susceptible to failure. He was sick then, been out of school for about two weeks. His dad is having a hard time at work, her sister is a cause of dismay in school and her mother is beyond worried. Further, the projects are piling up, the deadlines are near and the pressure is soaring. For someone, who have been on top since the beginning, being at the brick of becoming a disappointment is such an unfamiliar field. Those were trying days, Jacy was so vulnerable, we had arguments about how the publication was faring, and I was so ready to give up on him. I already felt that he has reached his downfall, and unfortunately, he is to bring down the publication with him. I was perturbed and I made sure he felt it.
I thought back then, he would surely succumb to the pressure of for the first time not being in control. That for once in his student life, things were in chaos. I guess, I misjudged him. To my surprise, Jacy stood his ground. He took things one at a time. Once cleared by his doctor to attend school again, he went to each of his sister’s professors apologizing and seeking for understanding. He then helped her to comply with her requirements constantly reminding her how their parents worked hard to provide for them. At barely 5 ft, he has definitely aced his job as a BIG brother.
After barley quartering his family’s dilemma, he went head on with his school’s projects. Being a consistent dean’s lister would mean that his professors would expect him to deliver his best. I could only image how many sleepless nights it took him to finally submit all of it in flying colors.
To top his epic comeback, that year, with Jacy on the helm, we were able to amass regional awards. Also, that very same Tabloid created on gave us one of the biggest national awards we would only have dreamt of. Jacy, with his every inch of resiliency, his dedication brought forth the rock of my dreams, the Best Student Organ recognition from the Catholic Mass Media Awards.
Further, on his last year, he has given up a chance to become our university’s student regent to come back one more time as my editor-in-chief. I knew he has always prepared himself to represent the entire studentry in the academic council. He was trained to do so, all he needed to do was to relinquish his post in the publication to run again in the Central Student Government. Had he run, he would surely secure, the Model Student Award given by the university. But he chose to let go of a dream, to make sure, that for one last time, we come into the regional writing tilt as one team. We won big time in the regionals, eventually landing top eight in the entire region. It was not as feat, as it required a humungous amount of time and effort. It took a toll on him, as he settled for being a finalist in the Model Student Awards. I was in the day of the recognition. I saw how heartbroken, he was. But the moment, he saw us, he saw his professors, not even a little amount of disappointment was seen his face. Instead, he thanked all of us for considering him. He also apologized for not being able to bring home the award.
I have been part of most of Jacy’s recognitions. I have attended to most of his awarding ceremonies. But that was the day, I am most proud of him, for his undisputed pliancy. In this world, where winning has always been the goal of everyone to remain modest in defeat is not something everyone is gifted of.
All in all, I could talk all day long on how great Jacy is, on how proud I am of what he has reached and on how much I am pained of eventually seeing him off the school’s grounds. He was a gift to us, a very surprising gift, a jewel.
With all being said, from the bottom of my heart, I hope that your organization would help me, us, in one way or another, to acknowledge a man, who has always been a vessel of inspiration to others, who has always went out of his way to be a good son, a loving brother and a loyal friend.
Sincerely,
YVANA JARDINE R. NOCON
Crosshair Cruzada
It was raining hard that day when Ahmed realized how cold the muddy ground he was lying on. His sight was all blurry and his breathing was getting as difficult as ever. The painful wound on his right arm seemed to be doing its intentions. He knew it, deep in his heart, it was about to happen. He could already feel the end coming.
But a part of him knew that such things were long been inevitable.
Gathering all his strength and his long-barreled war companion on the side, Ahmed slowly crawled over the thick mire, taking the pain out of his mind. It was only then he saw a trunk of a fallen tree, shrouded by bushes and shrubs. He knew it in himself that he had to hide. Somehow, he still wanted to think about everything he had done, even before.
Leaning on the rotten wood, he closed his eyes and let the darkness cover his sight.
It was a long time ago but he could still remember the feeling of being complete, together with his mom and dad. They had a simple life in the fields, treating everyday like there was no end. His mother, who took care of him back then, had never missed on making him feel loved. He had always liked seeing his mom paint her precious smile especially the way her eyes sparkled with bliss every time he touches her cheek. Those moments when he couldn’t ask for anything more, he would never forget it.
He had never forgotten it, not even once.
"By the heart, the tongue, the hand, or the sword."
He began to remember the first time he met those words. It was ten years ago, back when he was still a young lad. Those were the words of what they were taught as Jihad, a duty that they were believed to fulfill, and the words that had kept reminding him on how he struggled everything just to survive the blight of this cruel world.
The heart.
He remembered the day when his mother left him and his father. He was crying hard that time, trying to stop his mom from going away. He almost dragged himself on the floor while weeping but it seemed that he couldn't do anything more.
And what really got him was the way he didn't saw any emotions coming from his mother’s eyes. No bliss. No joy. It was as if she was not the woman he had come to loved. It somehow made a question in his mind, if he really had a place in her heart.
The tongue.
If he could just spill the words running in his mind every time he saw his dad intoxicating himself every night, maybe it could’ve gone better. If he could just tell him that he would always just be there to look after him, even when his mother left, maybe something would’ve change. If only he just told him those words even once, maybe he wouldn’t saw him give up, lying on the floor with foam coming from his mouth.
The hand.
It was raining hard that day when Ahmed realized how alone already he was. He had nowhere to go and no one to hold on. His mind was filled with anger, longing, and grief. He left home not knowing where his feet would take him.
“Isn’t it cold walking in the middle of the rain?” he heard someone said.
He looked behind him and saw a man in black mask wearing a gray shirt and faded denim pants. It was when the rain suddenly stopped. The bright sunshine, in the way he saw it, made the man seemed to glimmer. He could still remember the feeling that he had back then.
He was relieved.
“Come with me.”
Riding a motorcycle, Ahmed came along with him. They had gone across roads and went inside a deep forest, making him feel slightly dreadful. But somehow he knew deep in his heart that he wouldn’t be hurt. The sun was about to set when they reached a somewhat like a camp. There he saw other men wearing black masks too. They had rifles in their backs and were all looking at them.
“Welcome to your new home.” The stranger said.
The sword.
Years came fast and Ahmed grew into a young man. He got to meet other youth like him who were also brought in the camp. Together they were trained in using guns and rifles and were also taught about the group’s Islamic beliefs. They were indoctrinated about waging war against enemies of Islam.
“If you die in the combat, you will be a martyr and have a place in paradise.” Their leader once said.
He also became one of the best warriors in their legion. He gained the admiration of their leaders for his expertise in using arms. It was the fruit of his years of hard work and courage.
At last, the war has begun and here Ahmed was, hiding behind a rotten tree trunk.
His head was starting to get heavier and he could barely come up with his breath. He could also feel the wild beating of his heart deep inside his chest. It has been years but he got to realized something in his mind.
After all the things he had been through, he never asked anybody not even once, why everything had to happen. He was not sure but maybe somehow, somewhere in his heart, he still believed that there was a higher being looking on him.
“Was it that painful to be in paradise?” he thought.
He held his rifle within his arms making him remember the times he used it in on other people. He felt ashamed of himself. This was not the thing that he wanted to do. He never dreamt of anything greater. He only just wants one thing.
"I just want to live." he told himself.
The rain stopped as tears began touching the rifle's metal body. The wound that he got from the airstrike felt nothing from the pain that he had before it happened.. Later on, the sun began to spread its light capturing his sight.
“We met again…” Ahmed said as he closed his eyes.
Before giving his last breath, he remembered the two people he aimed his weapon in this war. He didn’t pull the trigger, not even once. Not on the back of a clueless soldier and not on the familiar look coming from an old woman.
Corra P. Shion
*Let lies swallow you down*
Tears fall down as I slowly walk in front of the crowd and receive the diploma.
"How I wish they could see me reaching the paper of success." After the ceremony, I visit the tomb of my parents without any companion. I give respect and celebrate for a while. I bought noodles and bread, and bring it to the cemetery. I took selfie and put hashtag #Familypicture #success.
All of these are the products of my past. My determination to change the society keeps me motivated to be a lawyer. Although I have now my license and already took the induction I am still confused where and when to start. Given the fact that I have no parents which may guide my decisions and may give a sort of advices. How I wish they are stll alive to witness my achivements.
I remember the day when I celebrate my eight birthday. All of the guests are enjoying the party while my mamang is busy preparing the foods. I’m very happy that day even my papang Jon-Jon is not around. He was with the city Mayor Rey P. Plaridel. Although we are not complete, still my friends and my mother are here to make me smile. While playing, I saw my mamang arguing with her colleagues. She is a business minded and an advocate of violence against women. Afterwards, I heard that there is a problem with one of our neighbor who was abuse by her husband. After minutes of talking, she approaches me and asks permission to leave me with my auntie. She has important thing to do and promise to go back as early as possible. So I let her to finish her duties then I continue playing with my friends. Many hours passed and the party was ended. It is only my auntie who is with me throughout the party and my both parents are missing. At first, I don’t know how to approach them after what they did. I got embarrassed and mad of what happened. It turns to be habitual that they ignore me. They don’t have time to be with me. I want them to realize that I’m still a child who needs their time and comfort all the day.
Early evening, I went to Judy’s house while waiting to my parents. Judy Martinez is my childhood best friend. We talk for a couple of hours. I tell to her all hatred and bad things happening to me. After a while, she gave me a lot of advices and cheers me up. I decided to go home and hoping that they are preparing a surprise for my birthday. Meanwhile, I saw the motorcycle of my papang. My emotions turn to be excited since I already saw a sign that may be my parents are at home. I run faster and open the door. I try to look for them but they are not present. Auntie told me that my father went back in the office and left his vehicle while my mother is still not around. What a day full of disappointments.
My parents are really busy doing their duties. In fact, they have no time staying with me. That is the time I learned how to stand firm with my decision and I learned to rebel. I turn to be an activist which aims to build a new system and seeking the equality amongst the society. I found myself leading a social group that changes the faults of the society.
Many years passed when I discovered an issue that changed my life. That time, I foresee myself to be a lawyer in the future. I studied in a university and took political science. As a social group leader, we did many activities that would help the people to deliver concerns in the government.
One day I received a message from my friend saying that the city mayor is trying to sell the barrio lot we are living. He really plans this to give back the pain we did against his administration. Accordingly, he is planning to sell the lot into a business company. They want to build amusement park and two commercial buildings to increase the economic finance growth of the municipality. On the other hand, I consult a confirmation to my father about the issue of selling and the act of demolition. I personally ask him and got shocked of what I heard. My father told me that the issues are true. In fact, the papers are already drafted and only waiting for approval. In line with ths, he said that their alliance is makng a move which will hinder the said activity. But the mayor is really powerful such he is handling the lives of people through money. Since they are working for him, he knows that the mayor controls the majority of the government decision including the boards and committees.
Suddenly, I told my mother about the plans of the mayor. She revealed to me that they already knew the issue and already plans a solution to rebut the administration. My mother is too aggressive in helping the community. They build a group that may protect the boundary in case the mayor implemented demolition process. She encourages the whole barangay to make a move in protecting the land and seeking justice for their rights as a citizen.
My group joins the barangay in planning and doing a protest against the municipality. We try to deliver our concerns with regards to the issues. We make papers and legal business affairs with other public lawyers. As what we did to stop the negotiations between the mayor and the business man, the mayor gets annoyed to my family. His eyes get hotter to all moves we are doing. He knew that my family controls the people who is fighting against him and seeking improvements for the betterment of the barrio.
One night, we received a message that my father died. We got stunned of what we heard. The only person that comes in my mind to make this crime is the mayor. I know that papang is making propaganda against him, and in return he killed my father. Full of emotions, we cried vociferously and blame the mayor. I know and pretty sure that he did this. He killed my father to lessen the problems he is facing now. Full of disparity, and suffering lies in grief and sorrow, my mamang and I don’t know what and where to start with. We are so fragile to handle another set of problems that will test our capacity in handling life’s fortune.
Unfortunately, while we are assisting the preparations of my papang’s entombment, many trucks came to demolish the vicinity. It was very timely and seems to be planned that the demolition team arrives to destroy our home. My mother quickly faces the demolition team together with the barangay citizen. She get really mad that time and so weak for another activity. The battle between the two sides arouses. Many people died. I personally witness how the people are trying to defend their homes. Meanwhile, I saw my mother hit by a stone in her forehead. I was too nervous and seeking for help, but it seems everybody ignores me.
I really don’t know what to do. My life was really devastated. My parents are both died because of corrupt intentions and demonic plan of the city mayor. My future was ruined by a prevailing man who tries to destroy many poor. Now we are badly seeking for justice. We really want fair decision. We really need to have our rights. We really want him to finished and put in jail while suffocating with his lies. We want him to experience the grief and sorrow of being alone.
I don’t have my parents now. Indeed, what keeps me motivated to be a lawyer is the intention to give justice to my parents and to other victims. Now that I have my licensed and I have the knowledge to give back the pain I handle through the years to a man who destroy my dreams, my future, and my life, I am immensely eager to go back him and filed a case. Though we failed to get justice before, now, I believe that the power is in my hand to refute his innocence, lies, and demonic plan against the society we living.
As a beginner in this field, I met Coring Choi as my first client. Her case was closely similar to what happened in me in the past. She is looking for her parents to give justice against a politician. It seems that all things happened to me went back as she stated the crime happened to her parents. Moving forward, luckily we won the case. This time my eagerness was boost up and extremely believing that the decision of the court will lean in my hand.
Now, the case is presently running and I’m hoping together with other victims, the city mayor will face all the consequences he did.
**END**
Am I Not A Good Friend?
I’m your Classmate
You ask me to do your homework immediately
Yet I ignore for you to exercise skills and ability
Then get mad for not making your responsibility
And finally destroy my self-esteem to everybody
I’m your Playmate
You invite me to play during Chemistry Subject
Yet I chose to study the topic and decide to object
Now you pay me to create your research project
But I refuse to keep and guide you not to reject
I’m your Seatmate
I warn you not to cheat and please to review thrice
Yet you disregard and continue to keep in disguise
Then the teacher caught you copying answers twice
Now saw yourself defending with words full of lies.
Foul Ethics in Politics
Everyone is expecting better from you
But what you can give is only an avenue
You aim satisfaction in everyone’s view
But you can’t provide a world in perfect hue.
Every time you spent money is bliss
But the needs of the children was miss
You pretend to consider crowd’s pleas
But you are extremely against with the deeds
You want citizens to commend thy personality
But your presence wasn’t felt by everybody
Your priority is not for the progress but popularity
That tells voters not to give you another opportunity
Build your inner self, burst it to the City of Pines
**BAGUIO ESCAPE**
Morning comes when you find the day out of nowhere.
It is the feeling of losing confidence because of disappointments in maintaining grade requirements, loosing parents’ expectation, hectic schedules in the university, and further obligations outside the school, unlabeled commitment, broken hearted relationship, family conflicts and many more experiences that bring all your emotions out of control.
Perhaps, all of these problems remind of your stupidity and the only thing you want to do is to just burst out.
To face this, it needs a peaceful place to unwind and burst all emotions to lessen the so called depression. It calls for a perfect place like Baguio which gives you relaxation and soothing climate for recreation.
**ROAD TO BAGUIO**
After eight long hours of butt-hurting travel from the bus terminal of Cavite City, you can now witness the unimaginable beauty and comforting climate of City of Pines. The perfect temperament for respite and the ideal ambiance of place will give you a pacifying feeling to analyze your problems and create solutiosn on how to overcome all these things.
With its record breaking lowest temperature of 5.1 degree Celsius last January 20, 2014, you would see yourself full of thick clothes while sleeping in your bed. But the best thing to do here is to enjoy watching the people doing their daily routines and visit the beautiful historical landmarks of the city.
It proves to be a perfect place for recollection, recreation, and relaxation. It is known for the most visited tourist spot in the Philippines an currently made it to the list of UNESCO Creative Cities Network. Truly, this is a perfect place to escape the real world and where you would love to stay for long time
**No More Singko in** BURNHAM PARK
Yes it is very easy going to school but it is hard to study deep the lesson and passed the examinations. How I wish I can solve math problems as easy like how citizens of Burnham Park do their morning routines.
It is located within the heart of the city. You can observe people smiling while doing their morning exercises. It seems that they are free of stresses. It is a perfect place for jogging, biking, and bird watching while enjoying the magnanimous view of Baguio.
Tasting strawberry flavored taho and rowing boats in Burnham Lake makes the tourist satisfied. But on the other hand, how did this place attains its beauty and maintains for a long time?
The beauty of Burnham park meets the expectation of the world. The city governance maintains the cleanliness of the environment, and the citizens are disciplined in managing their wastes. It made you realize that it takes all efforts in order to achieve the best. It takes consistency and hard work to own the stage of most visited tourist spot.
Like in school, it needs extra efforts in order for you to maintain the best results. It takes courage to end the semester successfully.
**Meet the Expectations of** BAGUIO CATHEDRAL
Most of the time our parents wish the best for us even it exceeds our limitation. And we can’t do anything but to meet their will. It is similar to how Baguio Cathedral teaches us in life.
Baguio Cathedral was built in 1920. It is described as the most holy place in Baguio City with pink exterior, massive twin spires, and elegant structural architecture. This church near to Session Road is dedicated to Blessed Virgin Mary and named as Our Lady of Atonement Cathedral.
You can observe the holiness of the place. The church said the people to walk in Christ. They emphasized to dress according to the image of God and follow His words.
But in reality, not all people are following the instruction of the church despite of its sanctity. Yet even its parochial citizens failed to follow word of Christ, the church still wholeheartedly accepts the people.
Indeed same as our parents, the time will come that we will fail to meet their expectations and they have nothing to do but to accept us as their child. It is the greatest love of parents and children relationship.
**To Burry Absences in** MINDS VIEW PARK
Minds View Park is the best place for purchasing memorabilia and souvenir items. Boasting its panoramic sceneries of the old gold and copper mines of the Ibalois tribe, you will enjoy staying together with your friends and families. You can see houses with burial tomb located near in their places.
The mesmerizing areas of the park can actually made you realize of the real scenario of life. In school you will commit absences in order to attend the different activities of the organization. Sometimes it feels you weak and pushes you not to attend the classes. But despite of absences, your determination in life to accomplish all the endeavors will end up in peace.
**More Tasks for** BOTANICAL GARDEN
The garden features wide array of plants. In here, you will have an opportunity to interact with our native people who are hospitable and friendly.
The number of plants corresponds to our number of responsibility. It only tells that the reward of excellent work is another number of different works. Same as if we managed to handle the growing of plants, it will yield more.
**Where is the love** TEACHERS CAMP?
Baguio’s Teacher Camp was declared in April 2005 as National Heritage site. It serves as most popular home for teachers during summer. It includes classrooms, dormitories, dining conference halls, athletic ovals, and wide field range.
How I wish it is easy to teach our hearts to point who to love in the future, like teachers who teaches us how to count numbers.
**Mend my Broken Heart** BAGUIO MUSEUM
Baguio museum displays the artifacts, art works, native tribe of the cordillera region namely Ifugao, Ibalois, Kankanaeys, and many other tribes. It features the early life style of each tribe before American colonization
I wish this museum can also display my love story. I want to see the world how foolish I am just to take care the heart of my special someone.
I want to show them that I can do everything just to make her smile and give her the best life she never had. But despite all efforts done, my love story ended of just saying goodbye thank you. Why is it so hard Baguio Museum?
**Leave Family Conflicts to** TAM-AWAN VILLAGE
Having good family imprints successful life. It is where all members of the family are working together for the benefit of one another. Likewise with what I experienced in TAM-AWAN Village, where it taught the true meaning of having family
This village was built to restore Ifugao and Kalinga villages in Baguio City. It demonstrates different cultures and arts of the whole tribe like dancing, drawing, language and their houses.
The village posted some evidence of their cultures like the quality and the measurements of their houses, their foods, and the way of their living as supported with their history embarked in stones.
People living in the village are working together to restore their culture.
**Many more steps to** LOURDES GROTTO
In commemoration to Blessed Virgin Mary, a place of meditation was built in western part of Baguio. It has a total of 252 steps in order to reach the top of Lourdes Grotto.
At the top awaits small chapel for recollection. You can offer flowers and light candles. It made you realize that there is no elevator toward success but you need to take the upstairs.
Challenges are constant. This is an evidence of life that as long we encounter challenges we are still living. Let us face all problems through the guidance of our almighty God. There is no other way to fix the conflicts but to face it and accept the truth
A Night of History
Before to start, I need to admit that I made this article because of personal reasons. It is out of curiosity. Maybe I'm fascinated on how other writers can sleep for a century years, or a millennium, and travel towards the future to witness the enchantment of tomorrow.
In the first place, I'm one of those people who criticize the problem of the society in particular with the issues concerning influx of machineries, poverty, shortage, war, and the corruption. I believe that time will come when all things will back to basic and will results to a peaceful living.
On the other hand, what I plan to do is to sleep for a century years and wake up to witness the mystery features of the future. So I prepare the following in order to achieve my plans.
I bought all books, magazines, and comics that I saw even those intended for kids. Then bring it all to my room together with five boxes of pizza and a dozen of donuts. I am eating the foods while reading until such time that I felt sleepy. Although you can call this as suicidal thing, yet I’m proud to tell that I did it.
After a while, I felt slowly weakening of my body and begin to sleep. I close my eyes and relax my body. I need to have a deeply sleep for a long time in order to travel the future. Now I’m sleeping without knowing what is happening in the real world.
As I am expecting, I woke up in a different world. I really don’t know where I am. I found myself seating in the sofa inside a dark room. It is like a museum that contains many related pictures. Meanwhile, I saw a man standing in front of me. He has no hair and wearing a grey shirt. He is staring at me while standing. I ask him the name of the place and the time. But he deeply breathes and show little dismay. "Is this the year 4015?" he suddenly close his eyes and tell that he doesn’t know what I’m saying. He doesn’t know how to explain everything and admit that he used to hear the things I asked way back years before.
"Don’t you know how to use the calendar? Aren’t you counting the years?" I start to get mad while asking him. "May be a long time ago" he answered. "I still remember that it was a millennium passed when I used to saw people using calendars but all of them died."
"My God!?" I shout with full of disappointments. "What did you say?" he asked "my God?" as I repeat "Ah" he reveals that it is his first time to hear the word “God”. After long years of staying in the museum he already saw the succession of every generation passed time to time. He witness how people sacrifice life and the changing of time over the years.
"Wait!!! I can’t digest all the things you are saying. Can you please explain one by one?" I requested. "Hmmm! as a matter of fact, I already saw you sleeping in this sofa for more than a decade. I thought you are dead, but I noticed that you are only sleeping and after 14 years you woke up without any knowledge about the present time. If you really want to understand where you are now, let me answer your question one by one."
The first thing that comes out in my mind is the shirt.
"What kind of shirt are you wearing?"
"It is made of enhanced alloy named Pugna" he answered. "It can last for a hundred of years or longer. All of the citizens here are wearing grey shirt. In fact you are also wearing it"
I didn't notice that I am also wearing a grey shirt. "Answer me, where are we now?" “We are inside the museum, all you can see here are specimens like you," he said. "Common, if you want to know further about this place lets go outside and talks for a while."
We leave outside the hall. While walking towards the door, I was too mesmerized with the pictures and statues displayed inside. After a while as we approach the street, I got shocked of what I saw.
"Rosario!? Is it possible? Is this the municipality of Rosario? I can't imagine how it looks like. I don’t want to believe that this is our town. I don’t know what are the changes happened here after a century years. The place was surrounded with old tall buildings. It was bombarded with damaged infrastructure. The roads are blocked with dead fishes which produces unpleasant smell. There are no cars producing sounds and free of noise. There are no electric wirings. You can’t see moving object other than those people without hair and wearing grey shirt. Oh God!!! Is this the promise land you want to live us? I don’t know why people need to suffer this world. It was already destroyed by different civilizations. I think this is the result of the influx of technology and the so much abuse of the people generation to generation."
We suddenly sit beside a small chapel. "Excellent. Isn’t it?" he said. "This is much better than the past". He is confidently saying the things as he compares the new face of the municipality in the past; he believes that it turns to be better than a decade before which has been damage by different military wars.
"Where are the cars?"
"We have no cars at all, we don’t need it. It’s only a source of noise!"
"How can you go from place to place?"
"We also don’t need to travel" he answered. “Why is it for? For us staying is an act of travelling," he said then close his eyes.
Thousands of questions were formed in my mind. "Do you have work?" I asked "work!? All of these are gone. We used to have work way back century before."
I was curious of what happened before, so I ask him to explain clearly the reason of not having work. "All of those are vanished. It was killed by itself. It was over power by machines. Don’t you have machines before? People start to fight against machines when the influx of technology controls the habitual living of many individuals. It looks like machineries invasion that gives better output than the one produce by other workers. Not only have the people suffered but it also the nature. It is the outcome of the pollutions made by the machine and technological equipment. But people fight against the machine domination. They won the battle. They learn how to manually fix things which gives an avenue for the development of their learning. They learn how to make foods out of chemicals. Before many individuals suffer from starvation and needs to find a job in order to provide their daily needs and expenses. Yet now, you don’t need to exert so much energy. You only need to drink a capsule once a year and no need to take foods."
I was too amazed with what I heard "We fight against time, we surpass generation to generation and kill the sources of everything. This is the basic world"
"What is the big problem that may occur in this time?" I asked. "The problem is the eternity. We are all immortals. We will live forever"
"You are saying that you will live forever?"
"Yes! It is a punishment for taking mortal sin way back before"
On the other hand, I ask the state of education they have, and what kind of institution exist. "We don’t have institutions at all. We learn things by simply looking the object. If we want to seek the information, we simply look for it and the data will come out"
"How about the people living here, what kind of individuals you are? Where you came from?"
"We have no age nor gender. What we knew is we are living. We don’t have peers, parents nor god. We are free to do everything. No limitations and no restrictions."
Afterwards I run fast. I don’t know if I’m going to believe all he said. I got afraid of what will happen in the future. I really run faster and shout out loud. I want to escape this.
"My god!!!" is this you call the future civilization? A millennium? A waste world? You already destroyed the world full of smiles and hopes. I really want to go back. Please help me god." My tears are falling because of detestation I experienced in witnessing the other world. Full of emotions I start to hysterical
"I already saw its feature and now I knew my purpose"
Meanwhile I heard a very loud voice shouting that waking up my soul. Suddenly I woke up hearing the voice of my brother saying. "Wake up wake up you are late prepare yourself and go to school"
One Ruler at a Time
One Ruler at a time!
In the current era, the role of youth has been very vibrant and significant especially that the millennials are given more opportunities to exhibit responsibilities entrusted to them, and the choices they firmly chose for themselves contributing enormously to the communities and organizations where they belong.
To attain oneness within the group, one must lower his pride.
Given the fact that all members of the group are exerting efforts to achieve their task, still one leader must arouse to lead the group. Spearheaded by the assigned leader, the members will raise suggestions and recommendations about the things they need to do for the betterment of their work. Thus, most students conduct a brainstorming activity to look for good ideas that might generate better outcomes.
However, when the time of decision making comes, most of the groups couldn’t decide which idea should be followed. One reason of this problem is the ego of the members. Students commonly insist their own ideas to create an output base on how they foresee the image result.
Somehow they disregard the authority of the leader to manage and to consult the pulse of the team members as they assert own beliefs and stand firm for it. Although the head of the group has the final say when decision making comes, still he could never conclude decisions without the consensus of the whole members. Therefore it results to unified and unorganized group.
On the other hand, this problem is also present in different groups most commonly in social groups like student council or professional board members. For the reason of having smart officers/members, the group has difficulty in creating final decisions need for a particular activity. Everyone wants their idea to be recognized and to lead the project. Undeniably, everyone is afraid to lower their pride because of the authority they have in the position.
Indeed, lowering ones pride keeps the group united. We need to respect everyone’s decision to produce better result. We need our ideas, concepts, insights, and objectives to meet halfway. Consequently, the project will reach its highest performance through the combined efforts and concepts of all members of the group.
Let our minds meet halfway to meet expectations better.
Student Leader
**ABOUT JACY C. ABUG**
My greatest achievement in life was bringing impact to the lives of the youth and empower the potentials of the student leaders in our university. Putting emphasis to their holistic development is truly my mantra. Thru this, I’m not only changing the mindset of the student leaders, yet allowing them to explore their worth in redefining their interest to initiate and carried out a lot of changes and improvements for the benefit of the youth.
In the current era, the role of youth has been very vibrant and significant especially that the millennials are given more opportunities to exhibit responsibilities entrusted to them, and the choices they firmly chose for themselves contributing enormously to the communities and organizations where they belong.
I served numerous organizations both in school and in communities, making remarkable contributions and achievements. To mention some few, I served as President of Central Student Government and chair of SASCO Consultative Assembly for two terms. During my term, I initiated the conduct of pioneering activities mainstreaming the potentials and best practices of the entire student organizations such as: 1st CvSU-Wide SASCOLYMPICS. 1st Provincial Eco-Summit, 1st CvSU-R SASCO Awards Night, 1st Student Organization’s Year-End Report, Performance Review; and SASCO Accreditation and Recognition. I have been a member of various national and professional organizations such as Philippine Association of Campus Student Leader, Institute of Integrated Electrical Engineers of the Philippines- Council of Student Chapters.
More so, I have established the SASCO 8-Point Agenda that gives direction to our university. The 8-PAs include: Academic and Skills Excellence, Environmental Programs, Research, Extension, Gender and Development, Community involvement, professional linkages and culture and arts. Indeed, this sets the standard and serves as best practices for our university at large.
Aside of being student leader, I am also a consistent academic achiever. Along with my commitments in various organizations, I never compromised academic standing.
Student leadership is not just my masterpiece, for academic year 2017-2018, I was selected by the university and public and private media practitioners to be the Editor-in-Chief of the CvSU NEXUS. I’m a responsible and dedicated journalist serving the publication for almost nine years, a milestone that became part of the university’s history.
More so, I have given the opportunity to encompass the genres of literary, arts and culture with flying colors. I have won different competitions in engineering quiz shows, dagliang talumpati, essay writing contests, panting and poster making contests, chorale competitions, and more.
Undeniably, joining student organizations for me is one of the greatest blessings I received from God. It has been my passion to help my co-students and serve the communities where I belong. One best manifestation of this is when I initiated to propose a program that would open more opportunities for financially challenged but academically deserving students to be scholars of the University. Without any hesitations, I seek for the approval of the campus administrator to consider the application of all aspiring scholars and during my term as President of the Central Student Government, the number of scholars increased to 324.53 percent! Truly, this initiative really helped the students to continue their tertiary studies.
I always grab the opportunity to help the whole studentry and leave legacy to the organization. During my term I also gave emphasis on the development and welfare of other students who are extending services to the University such as officers of CSG, Student Publication Editorial Board, Socio-cultural organizations and ROTC cadets and cadettes. I pioneered the comprehensive scholarship benefits for the service scholars. Formerly, service scholars need to serve for one semester before they were granted with the scholarship. Also, the benefits range from the lowest to the highest positions in varying degree. But through my initiatives, service scholars are now granted with equal benefits even before they serve the institution.
Above anything else, I have portrayed my commitment and faith to my religion belief by serving the church in so many ways. I never neglected my prime responsibilities to act as son of God serving the church as a member of Vocales Angelorum Chorale and supporting its activities in community involvement.
Life Without Sunrise: Binata na si Juan Dela Cruz
Maghahating gabi habang nakaupo sa harap ng bintana malapit sa papag na aking tinutulugan, ay nakatulala kong tinitigan ang mga bituin. Nag iisip kong ano ba talaga ang gusto kong mangyari. Mahirap ang mabuhay sa panahong ito, panahon kung saan pera ang bumubuhay sa tao. Marami na akong naranasan, lalong lalo na sa bawat pakikipagsapalaran ko. Una namatay ang aking tatay, tapos iniwan kami ni kuya . Iniwan niya ako kay nanay na laging mainit ang ulo pagdating sa usapang pera. Lagi nya nalang isinusumbat sa akin ang mga bagay bagay na may kaugnayan sa gastos ng pamilya. Masama bang kumain? Masama bang manuod ng telebisyon? Masama bang maligo? Hay! Naku! Lahat na yata nang ginagawa ko masama. Nagigingmasaya na lamang ako sa tuwing nariyan ang barkada. Mahirap talagang makahanap ng trabaho. Ako na siguro ang pinakamalas sa mundong ito. Ayoko sanang imulat ang magiging anak ko sa panahong ito, mahihirapan lang siya at baka maranasan niya pa ang kamalasang nararanasan ko.
Habang nag-iisip ng tahimik, ay may nabuo akong isang malaking pasya. Gusto kong lumigaya si nanay. Tama lang ang gagawin ko. Humanap ako ng malinis na papel at sinulatan ko si nanay. Alam kong hindi tama ang nararamdaman ko. Bigla-biglang may tumulong luha sa aking mga mata. Kahit na ganito si nanay, ay mahal na mahal ko siya. Sana maging masaya siya sa gagawin ko. Nay, wag ka nang mag-alala, wala ka ng dagdag palamunin. Wala ka ng sesermonan sa tuwing may nagbubukas ng telebisyon natin sa bahay. Sorry nga po pala sa mga kuryenteng nasayang. Nay pasensya ka na, hindi ko nabayaran yung mga inutang kung baon simula noong ako ay nasa kolehiyo. Pasensya na po kayo, kase walang trabahong natanggap sa akin. Pasensya na rin sa pag-gamit ko ng tubig. Siguro po ngayun, kakaunti nalang ang babayaran niyo sa tubig. Nay pwede niyo pa pong pagkakitaan yung cellphone ko,ibenta niyo nalang po kay aling Diday ng mga 3500. Nay may nabuntis nga po pala ako. Isa siyang mayaman na babae, maaari niyo po siyang huthutan kung wala na kayong maipapang binggo. Nay, hanggang dito nalang po siguro ang paghinge ko ng tawad sa inyo. Sana hindi na po kayo mamroblema. Nay, malapit na po palang mag eleksyon. Siguro pwede po kayong makahinge ng tulong kay mayor para sa aking kabaong. Walang kandidato ang hihindi sa inyo kase malapit na ang botohan. Nay, tiyak akong pupunta ang mga taong nakotongan ni tatay, yung ibibgay nilang abuloy ay tulong ko na po sa inyo. Para kahit sa papaanong paraan, ay may naiambag manlang akong pera sa inyo, at kumita ang kagaguhan ko. Salamat nanay at pasensya na po..
Habang hawak-hawak ko ang kutsilyo ni itay sa loob ng aking kwarto,ay nagdadalawang isip parin ako. Gagawin ko ba talaga ang lahat ng ito?. Unti unti kong sinasaktan ang aking katawan. Paulit-ulit kong hinihiwa ang bawat parte ng aking katawan. Napakasakit at makirot ang mga sugat. Maya maya pa ay napatulala ako sa larawan ng aming pamilya. Halos lahat ay nakangiti at masaya habang nagkakainan. Biglang pumasok ang lahat-lahat ng alaala sa aking buhay. Parang, ang mga oras ay nag-si-hinto at animoy isang CD player na nagrewind ng isang saglit.
Palipat-lipat man kami ng bahay ay masaya kaming nabubuhay nang magkakasama. Si tatay Karding ay isang pulis. Kinatatakutan siya ng mga tambay sa aming baryo. Sa tindig niyang napaka angas at sa mukha niyang nananapok, ay walang dudang siya ang hari nang mga engkwentro. Kahit napaka istrikto ni tatay sa labas ng bahay,ay ibang-iba siya sa loob kasama namin nila kuya at nanay. Palatawa siya at laging nakikipag biruan sa amin ni kuya. Lagi kong kinaiinggitan si kuya Fidel. Siya kase yung laging nabibigyan ng atensyon sa aming pamilya. Lagi nalang ako ang sumasalo sa mga pinaglumaan nyang gamit. Siya yung tipong hinahabol ng mga kababaihan at kilabot ng mga kabaklaan. Astig pumorma, maputi, maganda ang mga mata, at tinaguriang Mr. Pogi ng Rosario, Kawite. Iba talaga kapag may kapatid kang sikat. Lagi kayong pinagkukumpara sa lahat ng bagay. Si nanay Tina naman, siya na siguro ang pinakamabait na nanay sa buong mundo. Elementarya lang ang kaniyang natapos dahil sa kahirapan. Nakilala siya ni tatay sa isang karinderya sa Pasig. Napakasarap nyang mag luto. Dahil sa walang tinapos, ay nanatiling sa bahay na lamang ang tungkulin ni nanay. Siempre hindi makukumpleto ang pamilya kapag wala ako. Ako si Beno, maputi matangkad at gwapo rin daw sabi ng aming mga kapitbahay. Sabi nila nagmana raw ako kay kuya. Kaso hindi daw ganun kalakas ang porma ko. Pero para sa akin, ayus na kung ano ang meron ako. Ako yung binatang sawa sa pag-aaral, tanging kasayahan lamang ang ginugusto. Maraming oras ang ginugugol ko sa computer games at panunuod ng telebisyon. Hilig ko rin ang kumain ng kumain.
Si tatay ay laging nadedestino sa ibang lugar para sa kanilang Police Operation. Sa bawat gabing dumaraan ay laging kinakabahan si nanay. Natatakot siya sa pwedeng mangyari kay tatay. Lagi siyang nag rorosaryo sa tuwing may engkwentro sila tatay. Pero kahit anong pag iingat ang gawin natin ay hindi maaalis ang disgrasya sa ating buhay. Isang gabi ay may kumatok si pintuan. “Mrs. Reyes..! Tok! Tok! Ikinalulungkot ho namin ang pagkamatay ni Mr. Reyes, lubha siyang napuruhan sa labanan ng mga Pulis at kidnappers kagabi. Tuluyan napong nagpaalam ang inyong asawa. Kasalukuyang naroon siya sa hospital malapit sa polisya.” Gulat na gulat si nanay sa mga nangyari, hindi siya makapaniwala na wala na ang aming ama. Halos magunaw ang aming mundo sa balitang aming natanggap. Iyak nang iyak si nanay habang nakaupo malapit sa pintuan. Hindi namin alam kung ano ang dapat gawin sa mga oras na iyon. Sa sobrang sama ng luob ni kuya,ay sinuntok niya ng malakas ang pader ng aming kusina. Ang gulo-gulo at hindi ko maintindihan ang mga pangyayari. Napakalakas ng iyak ng aking ina. Bakas sa aming mukha ang kalungkutan, ngunit tinatagan ko ang aking sarili. Nilapitan ko si nanay at kinalamay ang kanyang kalooban. Sumama kami sa pulis para pumunta sa ospital kung saan naroroon si tatay. Nang marating namin ang ospital ay lalong lumakas ang pag iyak ni nanay. Hindi niya mapigilan ang mga nangyayari. Pagpasok at pagpasok palang namin sa kwarto ng aming tatay, ay hindi na nakayanan ni nanay ang mga pangyayari. Napaluhod siya at halatang nanghihina. Habang humihikbi, ay binuhat ni kuya si nanay papunta kay tatay. “karding!! Bakit mo kami iniwan... diba ang usapan natin ay magsasama tayo hanggang kamatayan? Sabi mo sabay tayong mamatay.Karding paano na kami ng mga anak mo. Ano na ang mangyayari sa amin ngayung wala kana?”. Sobrang kalungkutan ang mailalarawan sa aming pamilya nuong mga oras na iyon. Lumipas ang mga araw at inilibing rin ng maaga si tatay karding. Sobrang sakit para sa amin ang ihatid si tatay sa kanyang huling himlayan.
Pinilit naming bumangon sa mga nangyari. Inayos namin ang mga kailangan para mabuhay. Nagtitinda si nanay ng mga gulay para may makain. Si kuya naman, ay tapos na sa pag aaral at meron ng trabaho. Ako ay kasalukuyang nag-aaral sa kolehiyo. 4th year student na ako at dalawang semester nalang ay magtatapos na ako sa pag aaral bilang BSBM. Nagbago si nanay magmula nang iwan kami ni tatay. Naging mainitin ang kanyang ulo at laging pasigaw kung makipag usap. Hindi na kami nakakapagkwentuhan ng maayos, hindi niya na rin nakakamusta kung maayos lang ba kami.
Hindi naman maalis sa atin ang makahanap ng tunay na kaligayahan. Si kuya Fidel ay nagkaroon ng girlfriend; na masipag, maganda at lahat ng katangian na gusto niya ay narito na, kaya nga balak na niyang pakasalan ang babaeng ito. Upang lalong makatulong ay inamin sa akin ni kuya ang kanyang sikreto sa pag kakaroon ng pera. Bukod sa kanyang pinakamamahal na girlfriend, ay pumapatol din daw siya sa bakla. Sa katunayan nito, ay may limang bakla siyang pinatulan. Hinihingian niya ito ng pera sa oras ng kagipitan. Paminsan minsan naman daw ay nakikipagtalik siya sa mga ito para makakuha ng mas malaking pera. Sabi niya sa akin, ngayung nakapag desisyon na siyang magpakasal, ay titigilan niya na raw ang pakikipagkita sa kanyang mga bakla. Mag iipon siya para sa mga gagastusin at panimula ng kanyang sariling pamilya.
Kinalaunan ay nakasal na ang aking kuya sa kanyang asawa, matapos ang kanilang honeymoon ay hindi na siya nagpakita pang muli sa amin. Galit na galit si nanay sa ginawa ni kuya. Lalong nag iba ang ugali ni nanay. Wala na siyang paki alam sa akin. Matapos ang kanyang pagtitinda ng gulay, ay dumudiretso siya sa bingguhan malapit sa aming bahay. Ibang iba ang nanay na nakakasalamuha ko ngayun kaysa nung nabubuhay pa si tatay at kumpleto ang aming pamilya. Alas otso ng gabi ng umuwi si nanay. Inis na inis at nakakunot ang nuo. “hoy! Beno. Ang lakas lakas mo naman lumamon! aba eh baka wala na tayong makain bukas niyan!. Nakikita mo ba ang sarili mo?! Wala kapang trabaho hanggang ngayun!!. Tapos umaasa ka sa akin para sa iyong matrikula. Naku po!!! anak ng puta naman. Sige!.. iluwa mo yang mga kinain mo, para may pang almusal ka pa bukas ng umaga.” Ang galit na galit na sermon ni nanay. Sobrang nagulat ako sa sinabi niyang iyon. Hindi ko na kilala ang nanay na kasama ko sa bahay. “Ano!! Sumagot ka! Nasaan yung mga tuyo dito? Pati ba naman ang ulam na tuyo na riserba para bukas ay nilantakan mo pa? Hndi paba sapat saiyo ang itlog na maalat? Puta naman. Hay!!! Erhhh! Bwiset. Mula ngayon ay magbabayad ka na nang upa dito sa bahay. Nakakapang init ka ng ulo.” Sobrang nalungkot ako sa mga narinig kung iyon.
Mag sisecond semester na at malapit na akong magtapos. kahit iba na ang trato sa akin ni nanay, ay iniintindi ko pa rin siya hanggang sa nagipit ako at kinailangan ko ang pera. Kailangan ko nang pera para may maipambayad sa matrikula. Sa paaralan kung saan ako namamasukan, “okay class you may go, except for Beno Reyes.” Nagtaka ako kung bakit niya ako gustong maiwan sa klase, gayong wala naman akong ginawang masama. “goodbye sir,” “goodbye class see you tomorrow”. Ako nalang mag isa sa aming klase at may pinapasagutan siyang mga math problems. Habang ako ay nagsasagot, ay meron akong naramdamang humihipo sa aking mga braso. Pababa ito ng pababa hanggang sa mailagay ang kamay nito sa aking hita. Tiningnan ko ang aking professor at nagulat ako sa kanyang itsura. Nakasarado ang pintuan at mga bintana nung mga oras na iyon. Wala nang pantalon at brief si sir habang nakita kung naninigas ang kanyang pag aari. Nuong una ay natawa ako sa aking nakita. Pero, mukhang desperado ang loko. Pinilit niya akong hawakan ang kangyang ano, at hinalikan niya ang aking leeg. Hindi ako makapaniwala na ang gurong akala ko ay brusko, yun pala ay may gusto sa akin. Matapos ang aming pagtatalik ay binigyan niya ako ng 5000. Evening class nga pala ako kaya walang sagabal sa aking guro na gawin iyon. Napag isip-isip ko ang sinabi nang aking kuya. Ganun pala ang kumita ng malaking pera sa madaling paraan. Dahl dito ay nakakuha ako ng opurtunidad para maipagpatuloy ang aking pag-aaral. Matapos ang pagpapakasarap ko, ay umuwi na ako sa bahay. Binuksan ko ang telebisyon para manuod ng balita. Maya maya pa ay; “anak nang putang ina naman oh,,, ang laki laki na nga nang binabayaran natin sa kuryente tapos nuod kapa ng nuod ng telebisyon?! Ano bang utak ang meron ka!!! Tatanga tanga! Patayin mo nga yan at wala tayung pambayad sa kuryente! Saka, humanap ka nang trabaho para may silbi ka dito sa bahay!” Ayan nanaman ang akin nanay. Napakainit talaga ng ulo. Buti nalang at nakakuha ako ng pera kanina, salamat at may maibabayad na ako sa renta ng bahay. “ Nay,,, ito na nga po pala ang renta ko sa bahay. 2000 . yung susunod ko na renta ay ibibigay ko nalang sa susunod na buwan. Yung mga nautang kung baon nga po pala ay saka nalang kung makahahanap pa ako nang pera. Kung gusto niyo rin po, ay magbabayad din ako ng kuryente para hindi na kayo magalit”, “ aba!!! Beno. Kinokonsensya mo ba ako?! Pero mas maganda na ito para may pakinabang ka! Teka may trabaho kana ba?!”. Hindi ako naka imik sa tanung na iyo ni nanay. Pumunta nalang ako sa kwarto at nagsimulang gumawa ng mga projects. Pagod na pagod pero ayus lang. Si nanay nalang kase ang natitira kung pamilya, wala na kaming mga kamag anak dito sa Pilipinas. Hay!!! Sa sobrang pagod ko, ay dinalaw na ako ng antok. Nagsimula na akong matulog at pinatay ko na ang ilaw.
Nagising ako ng masaya at walang inaalala para sa aking matrikula. “nay.. good morning po”. “anong maganda sa umaga? Hoy ikaw! Aga agahan mo nga ang pag gising dito sa bahay. Hindi to motel. O siya sige, merong tuyo at sinangag diyan sa lamesa, kumain kana!. Yung kanin nanduon sa upuan, kahapon pa nang umaga iyon. Wag mong uubusin para may pananghalian pa tayo”. Si nanay talaga. Sabagay, bakit hindi pa ako nasanay sa kanya. Lagi naman siyang masungit. Sana magbago na siya. Pumunta ako sa lamesa at upuan para tingnan kung makakain pa ba yung kanin. Inamoy ko ito at tinikman. “Panis!” panis na yung kanin, kaya dali dali akong pumunta sa tindahan para bumili ng isang kilong bigas. “aleng Diday, pabili nga po ng isang kilong bigas.” “ito na yung bigas, ay beno may mga utang nga pala dito ang iyon nanay. Padami na nang padami eh, hindi ko naman mahindian kase kumare ko siya, pwede bang ikaw nalang ang magbayad? Karamihan kase ay puro alak ang inuutang niya.” “ah sige po. Baka sa susunod na buwan ko pa iyan mabayaran.” Matapos ang pagbili sa tindahan ay nag saing ako ng mabilisan. “Nay.. tara kain po tayo. Ito po may sardinas, kumain naba kayo?” hindi siya sumagot at lumabas bigla dala dala ang kanyang mga paninda. Paano ko kaya mapapaligaya ang aking nanay.
Mag aalas sais na at nag mamadali na akong pumasok. Pinuntahan ko si Sir. Babe, para itanung kung gusto niya ba talaga ako. Kinausap ko siya sa kanyang faculty room. Sakto at wala siyang kasaman co teacher. Pinag usapan namin ang tungkol sa amin.”sir yung nangyari sa atin.” “ahh yun ba? Kelangan mo ba nang pera?” ang tanung niya sa akin.” Sir pwede bang babes na ang itawag ko sayo.? Saka sir wala akong cellphone, gusto sana kitang makatext.” “Ahh sige mamaya, pwede kabang sumama sa aking bahay. Pagkatapos nang klase?” “opo sir”. At matapos ang pagkukumpirma ko sa aking teacher ay dumiretso na ako nang klasrum. Maraming kung ano ano ang pinag aralan namin. Tuluyan akong napagod. “o Beno tara! Uwi na tayo.” “ahh sir babes nagugutom na ako. Kain muna tayo.”
Pagkadating namin sa kanyang bahay ay nakahanda na ang mga pag kain. Dali dali ko itong nilantakan at nagpakabusog. Iniabot din sa akin ni sir babes ang cellphone na nirerequest ko. “Naku sir, salamat, loadan niyo ako ha? Wala kase akong pang load.” “sayang ka naman, sayang ang kagwapuhan mo. Haha para sa akin ka talaga.” Dinala niya ako sa kanyang kwarto at pinahiga sa kanyang malambot at mukhang mamahalin na kama. Binuksan niya ang kanyang flat screen na telebisyon, at isinalpak ang isang CD. Ibang klase rin ito si sir. Andami niyang koleksiyon ng mga sex videos. Bumalik siya sa kama at nagpahubad sa akin. Tinanung ko siya. “Sir may asawa ba kayo?” Meron pala siyang asawa, ang problema ay hindi nito alam ang kagaguhan na ginagawa ni sir babes. Kinaumagahan ay may daladala na akong 5000php habang papauwi sa bahay. Pagdating ko sa bahay ay naligo muna ako at nag bihis ng damit. “hoy! Beno! Mag dahan dahan ka naman sa pag gamit ng tubig. Hindi yan kasali sa binabayaran mo dito sa bahay. Anak ng... errhh... nakakabwiset... ang aga-aga.!” Lagi nalang ganito ang sistema sa bahay.
Sa wakas at mamayang alasais ay graduation na namin. Salamat din kay sir babes, kung hindi sa kanya, ay hindi ako makakapag tapos. Lahat kase nang bayarin ko dito sa iskul at mga baon ko ay siya na ang nagbayad, sa walong buwan naming pag sasama ay malaki ang naitulong niya sa akin. Nga pala, naalala ko ulit yung sinabi ni kuya. Kapag gusto ko na nang maayos na buhay, ay babae na ang aking hanapin. Unti unti ko nang iniiwasan si sir babes. kahit papaano, ay nag bunga rin ang mga pam bablackmail ko sa kanya. Sa totoo lang,ay natakot siya dati na malaman nang kanyang asawa ang mga kababuyan na ginagawa namin. Sabi ko sa kanya, pagtapusin niya lang ako ng pag aaral at titigilan ko na siya. Kakalimutan ko ang lahat at maghahanap ng maayos na trabahao.
Nagsimula na ang pag mamartsa. Hindi ko alam kung saan ko hahanapin si nanay. “Bakit ganun? Alam niya naman na graduation ko ngayun, eh bakit wala pa siya? Ano kayang nangyayari sa kanya? Pupunta pa kaya siya?” natapos ang gabi ng pagtatapos at walang dumating na nanay para samahan ako sa pag abot ng diploma. Mangiyak ngiyak akong kumuha nang diploma sa taas ng stage. Ginawa ko ang lahat para sa aking nanay. Pinilit kong makapagtapos para sa kanya. Pero, sa lahat ba nang pagtitiis na ginawa ko ay hindi parin bumabalik ang dating nanay na nakilala ko? Pinilit kong intindihn siya kahit hindi ko na kaya. Paanong, simpleng hiling ay hindi niya napagbigyan. Ang gusto ko lang naman ay kasama ko siyang umakyat sa stage at kumuha ng diploma. Hay naku. Walang silbi ang mga luha na ito. “wag kang iiyak Beno. Wag kang iiyak” ang sabi ko sa sarili ko. “patawarin mo nalang ang iyong ina at bigyan mo pa siya nang mga pagkakataon.
Bilang regalo, ay binigyan ako ni sir babes nang 10 000php. Siya nga pala, ay mayaman kaya barya lamang sa kanya ang sampung libo. Pag uwi ko, ay bumili ako ng litson manok para sa aming pag sasaya. Pag dating sa bahay ay nadatnan kung lasing na lasing at nakikipag inuman si nanay sa mga kalalakihan. Sobrang inis ang aking naramdaman. Galit na galit kong inilapag sa mesa ang litsong manok at nag bihis nang damit pambahay. Pinigil ko nalamang ang aking sarili habang nagtitimpi. Maya maya pa ay dumating si nanay. Pakunwari akong masaya at tinanung siya.” Nay? Kumain kana? Tara kain na po tayo”. “oh anak. Maligayang bati sa iyo. Nakapagtapos ka na nang pag aaral. Makakahanap ka na nang magandang trabaho. Ito tingnan mo. Ipinagdiwang ko na ang iyong, graduation night ba ang tawag dun? Anak... gusto mong inom? Tara inuman tayo!!!!” Ang dapat na masayang gabi ay nauwi sa kalungkutan. Sa totoo lang ay hindi ko magawang magalit kay nanay. Tanging pag titimpi na lamang ang aking ginagawa sa tuwing nasasaktan niya ako. Mahal ko siya, pero ang tanung, mahal niya pa ba ako? Nag mumukha siyang bata na walang pinag aralan. Sana magbago na siya.
Maghahating gabi na at hindi parin ako makatulog. Naiisip ko ang galit sa aking nanay. Lumabas ako ng bahay para makapag isip-isip. Mukha nang pera ang aking nanay. Habang nag iisip ay may nakilala akong isang babae. Simple lang siya at hindi kagandahan. Parehas kaming may problema. Namomroblema siya sa kanyang tatay dahil sa sobra nitong pagka lasinggero. Nag usap kami hanggang sa maramdaman naming, mag mamadaling araw na pala. Siya nga pala si Rhea. Elementarya lang din ang kanyang natapos at kasalukuyang bugaw. Napaka sarap niyang kausap at mukhang mabait, ngunit nagulat ako sa propesyon na kanyang ikanabubuhay. Matapos ang mahaba haba naming pag uusap ay natulog na ako sa aming bahay.
Matapos ang graduation ay niyaya ako nang aking mga kaklase na pumunta sa isang bar. Nagpakasaya kami nang gabing iyon. Umorder ng limang case nang beer ang aking mga kaklase. Hati-hati kami sa mga ginastos. Iba na talaga kapag may barkada ka. Kahit malungkot ay magiging masaya ka, at basta kasama mo sila gumagaan ang problema. Gabing gabi na iyon at parami ng parami ang mga taong nagsisipuntahan. Nag paalam ako ng saglit sa aking tropa para mag banyo. Sobrang sikip na nang pantalon ko. “excuse me po, padaan, grabe naiihi na talaga ako”. Dahil sa sobrang pagmamadali ko ay may nabunggo akong napakagandang babae. Kutis mayaman at amoy mayaman. Huminge ako ng sorry sa kanya pero nag patuloy pa rin ako sa paglalakad para pumunta sa banyo. Matapos kung mag banyo ay agad agad ko siyang binalikan. Pumunta ako sa lugar kung saan ko siya nabunggo. Hindi ko siya naabutan. Sa lugar na iyon ay may nakita akong isang kwintas namay lamang larawan. “Ano kaya ang bagay na ito?” Tiningnan ko ang larawan at nakita ko ang mukha nang babaeng nabangga ko. Napakaganda niya talaga. Hinanap ko siya sa bar. Nag paikot ikot ako at sa wakas ay nakita ko na siya. “Miss, sayo ba ito?” natagpuan ko siyang umiiyak at nagiisa sa lamesa. “Miss mabigat ba ang problema mo? Baka makatulong ako.” Lubhang napakabigat nang dinadala niya, at ayaw niya nang kausap. Gusto niyang mapag-isa pero nag matigas ako at sinamahan ko siya. Kwenintuhan ko siya nang ilang mga bagay, dahilan nang pag-gaan ng loob niya sa akin. “miss, ako nga pala si Beno Reyes, at ikaw?” “Judy Anne Reyes.” “Anong problema mo?” ang tanung ko sa kanya. Nagalit siya dahil sa pakikialam ko. Pero para sa akin kahit ngayun ko lang siyang nakita ay parang inlove na ako sa kanya. Parang ang gaan-gaan ng pakiramdam ko sa kanya at parang may kakaiba.” Yung asawa ko kase. Nahuli kong nambabae.” “paanong ipinagpalit ka nang asawa mo? Eh ang ganda ganda mo kaya. Loko loko ba yung asawa mo? Pero Mrs. Sa akin ka nalang at paliligayahin kita. May anak ka naba? “ “bastos ka! (sinampal niya ako at nahalata ko ang sobrang sama nang luob sa kanyang mukha) Oo may anak na ako. Isa.” Hindi ko napigilan ang aking sarili. Pumayag siya na makipag talik sa akin. Kahit hindi niya pa akong lubos na kilala. Sabi niya, pampalipas daw nang sama ng luob. Kaya naman pinagbigyan ko siya. Nag paalam ako sa aking mga katropa at isinama ko siya sa isang motel. Nag check in kami at nag paka saya. Alam kung hindi tama ang ginagawa ko pero ito ang nararamdaman ng puso ko. Parang gusto ko siya. Maaaring dahil sa kanyang malakas na sex appeal at maaaring iba pa. Napaka pusok ko nang gabing iyon. Lasing na lasing ako at walang control sa sarili. Habang ginagawa ko ang mga bagay na masaya ako ay patuloy siyang umiiyak. Ibinuhos niya ang lahat nang sama nang luob sa akin. “ ano ba ang pangalan nang asawa mo?” “Fidel Reyes” nagulat ako sa aking nalaman. Parang ginago ko ang aking kuya nung gabing iyon. Bakit hindi ko agad na pansin ang kanyang apelyido. Natanggal ang aking kalasingan sa aking nalaman, parang natakot ako bigla sa aming ginawa. Pero wala na akong magagawa tapos na ang lahat. Kasalanan ito ni kuya Fidel. Kung ipinakilala man lang niya sana si judy sa amin, ehdi sana nakilala ko kaagad ang babaeng ito. Mayaman pala ang kanyang pamilya at wala nang pinoproblema si kuya. Hay! Pero huli na ang lahat sana hindi ko mabuntis si Judy. Natapos ang gabing iyon at hindi na kami nagkita. Umuwi ako sa bahay nang lasing na lasing at antok na antok.
Natulog ako at nagising nang mag aalasdose nang tanghali. “ anak nang kaputa-putahan naman oh. Hoy! Beno saan ka nanaman nanggaling ka gabi? At hindi na yata kita nakitang pumasok sa bahay?” kahit namura ako ni nanay ay masaya ako dahil nag karoon siya nang paki alam sa akin. Napansin niya ako sa kahit papaanong paraan. Inilabas ko na lamang sa kabilang tenga ang mga sinabing iyon ni nanay. Dahil sa aking hang over ay naligo ako. “hoy! Beno. Dahan dahan sa paggamit ng tubig. Hindi ikaw ang nag babayad niyan. Bakit may trabaho ka naba? Wala ka na ngang binabayaran dito sa bahay, tanging upa lang nang kwarto mo. Naku! Ang lakas lakas mong lumamon. Ang lakas mong gumamit nang kuryente at lalong lalo na ang paggamit mo nang tubig! Hoy hindi yan swimming pool. Yung ipinaliligo mo sahurin mo para may maipanglaba pa tayo!!” sa narinig kong sermon na iyon ni nanay ay parang nag iba ang pananaw ko sa kanya. Paglabas ko nang banyo ay nag pahinga muna ako.
Maya maya pa ay sinermunan nanaman ako ni nanay. “ Nay! Ano pa bang kulang ko?! Bakit kaba nagkakaganyan?! Pasensya na kung tumataas ang boses ko ngayun. Pero nay, gusto ko sabihin sa inyo na mali ang ginagawa niyo! Sa totoo lang, tayong dalawa nalang ang magkapamilya dito sa Pilipinas! May iba pa po ba kayong kamag anak? Nay,kung hindi niyo ako matatanggap. Mabuti pang patayin niyo na rin ako. O dikaya palayasin niyo nalang din ako dito sa bahay. Parang, mas mahal niyo pa yung mga alak. Lagi niyo nalang akong minumura! Nay mahal niyo pa ba ako?! Nay alam niyo po, gusto ko kayong maging masaya?! Nagsipag ako para makatapos nang pag aaral kahit hindi ko na kaya. Nanggamit ako nang mga tao para makapagtapos. Nay kung lahat ng bagay ay isisisi niyo sa akin. Isisi niyo na rin pati yung pagkamatay ni tatay!!! Nay naging demonyo na kayo!!!” Sinampal niya ako at napaiyak ang aking nanay. Dahil sa sobrang galit, ay umakyat na lamang ako sa aking kwarto at nagpalipas nang oras. Sobrang sama nang loob ko nung mga oras na iyon. Sana hindi nalang nangyari ang lahat nang ito. Parang hindi niya ako anak kung tratuhin. Ayus lang naman sa akin kung paulit-ulit niya akong muramurahin, pero sana mahalin niya rin naman ako. Sobrang sakit dahil, nanay ko pa ang tumatrato sa akin nang ganito.
Gabi na at lumabas pa ako nang bahay. Sobrang sama nang luob ko sa mga nangyari. Niyaya ako nang isang tambay na makipag inuman. Nilunod ko ang aking sarili sa alak. Tumagay ako nang tumagay, hanggang sa ako ay malasing nang todo. “Pare, bakit mo tinitiis na ginaganun ka nang nanay mo?” tanung nang aking kainuman.” Naku bakla yata yan si Beno. Sayang ang kagwapuhan, BAKLA naman.” Nagpanting ang aking tenga dahil sa aking mga narinig. Nagwala ako at itinumba ko ang lamesa. “Gago ka. Sino ang bakla sa atin?” Hinamun ko siya nang suntukan. Nakipagsuntukan ako pero hindi umubra ang tapang ko. Dahil sa sobrang kalasingan ay kinuha ko ang kutsilyo na nakalagay sa lamesang aking itinumba. Pinigil ako nang aking mga kasama sa tangkang pagsaksak sa aking kainuman. Basag na basag ang mga bote at puro bubug ang nasa paligid. Umuwi ako sa bahay nang patumba-tumba at dumiretso ako sa aking kwarto. Pinilit kong mahimas-masan ang aking sarili at dumungaw na lamang sa bintana.
(Tunog ng orasan: DING DING DING DING DING DING)
Nagising ako sa katotohanan nang mga oras na iyon. “Naku ano ba itong nangyayari sa akin? Buong buo na ang desisyon ko. Gusto kong lumigaya si nanay para narin sa aking tatay. Nanay, mahal na mahal ko po kayo. Sasabihin ko nalang po kay tatay na mahal niyo rin siya. Sana mabasa niyo ang sulat ko. Nay, paalam na po. Manginig-nginig kong itnaas ang kutsilyo ni itay. Maya maya pa ay, biglang pumasuk si inay sa aking kwarto. Nag mamadali at naluluha. Waring humihinge ng saklolo. “anak nakita ko ang tatay mo! Papatayin niya ako!” ang malakas na ungol ni inay. Dahil dito ay ibinaba ko ang kutsilyo at niyakap ko si nanay. “nay, nandito lang ako, hindi kita iiwan, patawad, i love you”
Hindi ko pala kayang iwan ang aking nanay na ganun na lamang ang kalagayan, isang baliw.
WAKAS
@ENGINEERjacy24
