Amy MorinNo one ever promised that life would be fair. In fact, life is unfair often. Your ability to accept that life isn’t meant to be fair can go a long way when it comes to getting you through tough situations in life.
1.Acknowledge the Situation
Sometimes people try to stay in denial when they face a tough situation. However, the longer you try to avoid the problem, the longer it will take to address it.
Acknowledge the situation exists, regardless of how you feel about it. Be prepared to face the situation head on so you can get through it. Even if you can’t change the situation, acknowledging it can help you accept it and move on.
2. Develop a Plan
Brainstorm potential ways to deal with the situation. You’re likely to have more options than you might think. Spend time thinking about how you can respond to a tough situation.
Even if you can’t fix it, you can develop a plan to cope with it. For example, determine who you can call on for support and how you can keep going even when you don’t feel like it.
3. Seek Help When Necessary
Asking for help can be a sign of strength and courage. Don’t be afraid to look for help in a variety of ways to help you cope with a tough situation in life.
Whether you need some practical help, like a friend to proofread your resume, or you need emotional support from your grandmother, don’t expect others to know what you need. Tell people what they can do to be helpful and you’ll get your needs met much faster.
4. Change What You Can
Identify what is within your control and resolve to make change. For example, if you got fired because your boss was unfair, don’t waste your time dwelling on your anger. Instead, take action and begin applying for new jobs as soon as possible.
If you can’t change the situation, you may be able to change your attitude. For example, if you’re dealing with a death of your grandfather, you can’t do anything to bring him back. However, you can change how you choose to view the situation.
Although it’s unlikely you can suddenly change your attitude over night, you can change it over time. It is a process that takes hard work. However, simply recognizing that you can use an attitude adjustment can go a long way to creating change.
5. Identify What You Can’t Change
Don’t waste time and energy trying to change things you can’t change. You can’t change anyone else and you can’t change your past. Spending too much time thinking about and wishing things were different won’t do any good.
Instead, accept that the situation is unfair and tough. Don’t pretend it’s not. But don’t waste a second trying to will it to be different.
6. Develop Coping Skills to Deal with Your Feelings
Just because you acknowledge a situation is unfair, doesn’t mean it won’t hurt. Dealing with sadness, anger, frustration, and disappointment is tough business.
Develop a plan to cope with all those difficult feelings. Resign to take care of yourself by eating healthy, getting exercise, and getting adequate amounts of rest. Find strategies to deal with complex feelings, such as spending time with loved ones, journaling, or participating in fun activities.
7. Focus on What You Can Gain
Usually something good can come out of even the worst situations. Focus on what you might gain for having survived a tough situation.
Perhaps, you’ll come out of it a stronger person or maybe you’ll have learned a valuable life lesson.Whatever it is, try to view the situation as a learning experience that will help you in some way later in life.
