Learning your value starts from knowing and appreciating that things happen FOR you and not TO you. It means knowing that the challenges and blessings you receive in life aren't opposite things but the same. Challenges brings experiences, from experiences come leanings and these learnings are blessings. It is from this fact that we realize we need to stop blaming ourselves, others, time, life, or circumstance, and start asking questions like: what can I do about my situation and what did I learn from it ?
staying still and stagnant in an unsatisfying and unproductive situation will just cause you greater pain. So why not choose to learn how turn your miseries into glory and your challenges into new pages in your life where you can write a different story and learn from the old story you've been from.
Stop being in the victim are start being in victor.