Susan's story #3
Lead Image by me.
This is the third part of this story, you can read the first part here and the second part here. https://read.cash/@Deeepensiverse/susans-story-1-what-ally-saw-c1756b90 https://read.cash/@Deeepensiverse/susans-story-2-what-she-read-7e7e8408
**Susan's POV**
"Susan, it's not what you think"
That was the last thing I heard him say before I ran, I heard him shout my name and run after me. I just wanted to get away from him, I ran to the first cab I saw and told him my destination. Dave caught up with me.
"Babe, let's talk about this, you know I love you," he said holding my hand.
"Let me go"
"Come on, it's not what you think" he defended.
"You're an a**hole, why don't you go and meet *her*?"
"She means nothing to me, you should know that, she's just a girl I met"
I couldn't believe my ears, I violently dragged my hand from his grip and turned to enter the cab.
"At least, let me drive you home"
"NO, I'm done" I sunk enough anger to the No, enough for him to get it, and threw the ring at him. He looked really hurt, it took everything for me to walk away.
"But I'm not done," he said tearfully. I looked at him from inside the cab. I wondered if he was just pretending, I had never actually seen him cry all the time we were together.
My heart softened for a moment then I remembered Dara, I remembered the texts, I never thought he would do this to me, I thought he truly loved me.
A week without him felt like hell, I was accustomed to talking to him every day. He would call and ask about my day, I'll rant and tell him every single detail then he would tell me about his too. My life felt empty and gloomy. He still called and sent texts every day but I didn't reply to his texts or pick up his calls. The fact that he had the nerve to try to lie to me got me more annoyed.
He came to see me twice at work during the week. When I was told that he was around the first time, I said to tell him I wasn't on the seat. The second time, he came as a customer that wanted to open an account. I walked him out of my office immediately.
My neighbor told me he came to my apartment every evening. I had not gone home since then because a part of me knew he was going to come to see me. I stayed at kiki's parent's house. She lived with her parents.
The girls called me and said Dave has been calling them to tell them to talk to me. He told them he was sorry and that he had ended things with Dara. He told them that he loved me and he missed me. He wanted me to pick up when he calls and reply to his texts.
It was frustrating to see him make so much effort.
9 days after the Dara saga, My mom called me to come home, she said she had something to discuss. I went to my parent's house to see my mom.
The first person I saw was Dave sitting beside my mom.
"Mom, NO" I turned to go out, I couldn't believe his cheating ass involved my mom in his schemes.
"Susan, sit, just hear him out," she said and added, "Please, for me". I sat down and she left us.
" I haven't seen you in a while, you look nice"
"Cool"
" I miss you a lot" Dave added.
"What do you want Dave? Do you not realize that this is your opportunity to go after Dara or whatever her name is?"
"It's you I want, she meant nothing, it was a momentary lapse in judgment. I honestly don't know what I was thinking. I'm really sorry"
I glowered at him making my annoyance clear.
"Babe, you have every right to be annoyed, I understand but I can't lose you. I don't think I can survive the next few months without you. You're the reason I wake up every morning, you're the only person I see my forever with, I'm s..sor..I'm sorry babe" Dave pleaded tearfully.
"Do you know how I felt when I saw you the both of you?"
"I understand, I would be pissed too, I don't even know what I was thinking, I know that we might not go back to how we were right now but I hope you'll eventually trust me again"
"What do you want me to do?" Tears fell freely from my eyes. He moved closer and held my hand.
"Let's start slow, pick my calls, reply to my texts, let's meet up. The last 3 years with you have been nothing but bliss. My life will be shattered without you in it, what do you say?"
I said nothing.
"Jane" Dave pressed.
"I'll think about it" I finally said and he lit up, I could see that he was really happy, he hugged me and looked at me. He had this look in his eyes.
"Don't you dare kiss me" I exclaimed, recognizing the look. I missed him looking at me like *that.*
"I didn't kiss you *na*" he said defensively
"Lie that you didn't want to" I dared, rolling my eyes.
"I wanted to..." he admitted and blushed. He hugged me, we talked for a while and he left.
I was preparing to leave when my mom came to sit near me.
"I see you and Dave have made up" She started to say.
"We're not back together yet, I have to think about it"
"Okay but you must know that he really loves you, he tells me that he proposed marriage to you and you agreed" my mother was hurt that I didn't tell her.
"It's not like I didn't want to tell you, mom. I suspected that he was cheating and I didn't want to raise your hopes in case I have to call it quits"
"I understand but don't hide it from me, I want you to tell me yourself next time. I hope you guys sort out your issues. He's a good one"
"Mom, don't put pressure on me"
" I'm not, I'm just saying"
Dave called every day, he started and ended the call with apologies. I missed him, I missed what we had. I wanted it back and before I knew it I agreed to get back together.
My friends said they were happy as far as I was happy. My mom was ecstatic, she asked me when she could start the wedding plans.
My dad told me that he was happy for me but I should be sure of what I wanted.
Dave's call interrupted my thoughts, I picked up.
"Hey baby" he started to say.
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There's just one more part left.
Any words for Susan?
Any words for Dave?
Do you think it was stupid of her to go back to him?
What would you have done in her place?
Do you think people change?
Thank you for reading🤗.
©Deeepensiverse
October 31st, 2021.
I'm happy to be back on read cash after the two days hiatus, I had an extremely busy Thursday and Friday. I hope to read as many articles as I can and catch up on the ones I've missed. The third part of Susan's story that was supposed to be out on Thursday will be out today or tomorrow. I can't wait for you to read it☺☺.
Susan's story #2: what she read
Lead image by me.
This is the second part of the series titled Susan's story. You can check the first part here. https://read.cash/@Deeepensiverse/susans-story-1-what-ally-saw-b12b7e07
**Susan's pov**
3 weeks passed on swiftly, everything appeared normal. He was still the same Dave I knew, the Dave that begs me to stay over for weekends, the Dave that could never take something from a place and return it, the Dave that loves to watch me cook and craves my food.
Everything seemed fine except that due to what Ally said, I was becoming suspicious. I noticed that he was always with his phone, he would always take the phone with him. I didn't think much of it before because I always thought it was work but now I think he didn't want me to find out about Dara.
I noticed that he never volunteered his whereabouts, he never asked me where I was maybe to avoid telling me where he was.
There were days he would act so distant and be on his phone throughout and when I asked him about it he said "it's just work, babe". I assumed he fought with *her*.
There were days he would act so sweet to me, shower me with words. It was so weird and out of place. I wondered why he did that, 'did he realize he wanted to be with only me?'
My thoughts spiralled for weeks.
One fateful day when I stayed over at Dave's apartment for the weekend, he rushed to the toilet because of stomach upset and his phone chimed near me. I realized that he forgot his phone in the bedroom.
The phone chimed again, I resisted checking the phone. The phone chimed thrice again and curiosity got the better part of me. The phone was locked so I decided to try 'Susan's boobs'. I forced him to change his password to that during a dare because he said my boobs were his favorite thing in the whole world.
The password worked, his chat with Dara was open, she asked him if 'the bitch was still around' and sent her picture with the caption 'yours tonight'. I read their previous chats which confirmed that they were on for the night and he told her to wear something sexy. My anger reached its peak. I decided to figure out where they were supposed to meet up. I read that they were supposed to meet up at the lounge at Presken Hotel.
I read so many provocative texts Dave sent to her till I couldn't take it anymore. Tears built up in my eyes, I had suspected this but I had hoped it wasn't true. It pained me to read all that. I always put off confronting him because of lack of evidence but I could catch him if I went there.
Around 5 pm, Dave told me he had to go and meet a client by 7 pm.
"On a Saturday, can't you postpone it?" I asked.
"I wish I could babe but I can't, you know I like spending time with you," he said and pulled me close to his body.
He was really a good liar, he lied to me looking straight into my eye.
"Who's the client?" I pressed.
"Let's not talk about work babe, just kiss me"
Before he left at 6 pm, he kissed me. He acted sweet and promises to buy me chicken and chips when he was coming back. I wondered how someone could be so deceitful. He looked uninterested as if he was actually sad to go. He told me he would miss me and can't wait to be back in my arms.
Thirty minutes after he left, I ordered Uber to take me to Presken hotel, I was afraid, I considered going back to his apartment but I couldn't, I had to see it.
What I saw five minutes within my arrival shocked me, I saw Dave kissing her, right there. Tears filled my eye as I confirmed my worst fear. I left where I sat and stood by the reception, I saw them coming toward the reception his arms wrapped around her.
Dave didn't see me, he went to the receptionist and asked for his reservation.
"Dave" I called.
He looked at me and recognition hit him, he dropped his arms from her body, moved towards me, and smiled.
"Babe, what are you doing here? I was about to tell you I got here safely" he said still smiling, he wanted to know what I saw.
"Are you being serious right now?" I shouted with tears in my eyes. I studied the girl with him for the first time, she was short, 5'2 tops, she was what someone could describe as petite. She was dark and she didn't like me, she was actively rolling her eyes at me.
"Susan, it's not what you think"
That was a lot, I pitied Susan as I was writing this. This is too much for her to bear.
Some would say it's bad to check your partner's phone but if she hadn't, she wouldn't have gotten evidence. Do you think what she did was right?
What would you have done in her situation?
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October 27, 2021.
©Deeepensiverse.
Susan's story #1: what Ally saw.
Lead image by me.
Susan is a 27-year-old banker, she's 5'6 and light-skinned. She's attractive and she knows it. She has a boyfriend named Dave who was a tech guy, her Job pays her well. She likes to think she's living the life she hoped for.
**Susan's pov**
My phone chimed, I took my phone out of my bag to check my message, it was a message from the i and my besties group chat named 'the girls'
***Kiki: Yo, babes, where are you?***
***Me: I'm just outside, babes.***
I entered the lounge where we met every Friday evening and moved towards our usual table.
"*Ahnahn*, why didn't you sleep there?" Pelumi said as I approached them.
"We had a meeting, it ended late, the Head of the department showed up 2 hours late" I announced.
"Sorry dear, it must have been stressful, closing two hours late" Allison added.
"Yes oo" we delved into our usual routine which was gisting, we talked about various things, kiki talked about one of Lagos playboys that approached her, Pelumi talked about the lack of a man in her life.
"Guess what guys!" I exclaimed
"What is it? Just talk and stop being dramatic" kiki rolled her eyes.
"Dave proposed to me!" I screeched and stretched out my hand to them to flaunt my ring and covered my face with my other hand.
"He suggested we go on a date yesterday and asked me to wear a gown. He picked me up from my apartment around 7 pm wearing a suit, it was weird because he isn't even a suit guy, he really opened the door for me and did all those chivalrous stuff. We went to his house and while we were on the bed after yunno, he fed me chocolate and I felt something hard in my mouth and brought it out. It turned out to be a ring, I looked up to see him climbing out of the bed and he went down on one knee on the floor. I sat up and then he said 'I can't imagine my existence without you, you know we're forever but I believe it's time to make it official, please marry me' I cried, it was touching, I said yes then we made love again"
My friends were all over me, I noticed the way Allison's face changed a bit, she went quiet, I wondered 'wasn't she happy for me?'
"Allison, why did you go quiet? Is something the problem?" I enquired.
"No, it's just... Nothing, I just have a headache" she defended and turned her face away from me.
"Ally, I'm serious, I know there's something" I pressed her, it was obvious she didn't want to tell me something.
"Well, I think i saw Dave today, there's this girl that works in a law firm in the building next to us, her name is Dara, I saw her kiss him and enter his car, that's why I'm surprised that he proposed yesterday" she started to say
"Are you sure it was Dave you saw?" I countered.
"I think so, it looked like him from behind"
"I think you're mistaken" Pelumi added
"This is why I didn't want to say anything" Ally replied annoyed. "Forget I said anything, maybe it's not him"
"What was the color of the car that you saw?" I pressed.
"I think it was white, it looked like a Corolla, you know I'm not good with cars"
"Dave's car is black" I retorted
"That's true, I guess it's not him, for a second I was scared, he would have lost him balls first thing tomorrow morning," kiki said then sighed dramatically.
"Ally, you too *sef*, don't be saying what you're not sure of" Pelumi chided.
"I'm sorry, Sussy. I was just looking out for you. You know this" Allison said regrettably, holding my hand.
"It's okay *joor*, I understand"
"To make up for me ruining the mood, order more drinks, it's on me "
The night went on, I and the girls had drinks to celebrate my engagement but my mind wasn't settled.
I remembered that I saw a message from someone named Dara on Dave's phone. Dave had claimed she was an annoying client that he had to work with. He volunteered the information and she thought he was being open. Was he just being defensive? I hadn't thought much of it then because I trusted him.
Dave's brother had a white Corolla, was it actually Dave?
What is going on?
What should I do?
Should I confront Dave?
This is the first part of Susan's story, it's a series. I hope you enjoyed it.
What should Susan do?
What did you do when you suspected that your partner was cheating on you?
What will you do if you suspect that your partner is cheating on you?
Do you think Allison shouldn't have mentioned it?
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October 26, 2021.
©Deeepensiverse.
New sponsor alert! @Kristofferquincy, thank you for the sponsorship, I appreciate it a lot 😁
His will
Lead image by me.
Jane imagined how her birthday party would be, she was going to be eighteen years old. She would be finally legal. She's always had a plan for her party, "let's make a statement with your party, set the standard" Cindy, her friend had told her, and her other friend high-fived in agreement. She wanted to "make a statement".
She knew her father could afford the kind of celebration she wanted, she was the only child and her father was one of the wealthiest men in the state. Her father called her to his study at their home, she was excited to go, she had already finalized the plans for her birthday.
"Jane, about your birthday..." her father started but she cut her father off saying "Yes, daddy, you don't have to worry, I...." She trailed off, telling her dad her plans excitedly.
"So, what do you think daddy? exquisite yeah?" She enquired.
"I had a different thing planned, I just think..."
"Daddy" Jane cut him off " please, I want to set the standard"
"Fine, have it your way"
"Thank you, daddy, I love you" she stood up and hugged her dad.
The day came, it had been a busy few weeks for Jane, she couldn't wait to impress her friends. She urged her parents to vacate the house for the day so that her friends would feel comfortable. She and her friends had a lot of games planned, at least the ones they could do without alcohol. Her dad gave her 2 conditions for the party: no alcohol and the party shouldn't exceed 7 pm. The party was scheduled for noon.
10 hours later, Jane felt like a total mess, it was as if everyone was against her. The party had been a disaster. Her friends that she thought were going help her with so many major things left her, her mates had snuck alcohol into the party defying her instructions. Before she could say jack, the party turned to a congregation of drunks. All her plans went down the drain, they littered her house, broke her mom's favorite flower pot. They refused to leave despite her pleas, her parents arrived around 9 pm and saw how terrible the party was going.
Jane got grounded for a month. It was supposed to be the best party of her life but ended up in total ruins. Her parents expressed their disappointment greatly.
After a month, her father called her to his office and asked "how did you like being grounded?"
"I hated it, it was the worst, I haven't been grounded since I was 12" she replied sadly.
" I was really disappointed at how everything played out, I had a plan to celebrate your birthday," her father said.
" But... I had no idea, you should have told me" Jane was sad, she had no idea.
" I tried to but you seemed focused on your idea and anything I said would seem like I didn't want you to have your way"
" What did you have planned?"
" I was going to give you my debit card to shop or do whatever you want to for that day, then go to Paris during the holidays, you've always told me of how you wanted to go to Paris"
Paris, Jane started to cry, she missed the vacation of her dreams to make a statement, she wished she could turn back the hours, she would have done everything differently.
Yesterday, I kept thinking till I fell asleep, My secondary school classmates just finished at Covenant University three days, I saw the post on Instagram yesterday night. So many of them have graduated because they went to a private University rather than a Federal one that I go to which delayed me because of the tough admission process and strike. I was happy for them but it made me sad a bit.
I kept worrying, subconsciously comparing myself to so many of my friends that have graduated.
I woke up this morning and I started thinking of it again, a bible verse then disrupted those thoughts "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the LORD, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end"
I immediately said "let your will be done"
I can't keep comparing myself to them because God's plan for me is different than theirs. God has the blueprint for my life and I trust him to lead me through it.
I went to a church 4 weeks ago and the preacher asked everyone to pray that God should cancel our prayer requests. People looked as murmured what's this preacher saying till she explained that it means that God should have his way.
Sometimes we just need to sit back, let God have his way and everything will fall into place.
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Thank you for reading🤗.
October 25, 2021.
©Deeepensiverse
Reverse fable: the real-life.
Lead image by me, the other image from Unsplash.
I'm sure we have all heard the Aesop fable titled the tortoise and the hare. I heard the story when I was very little.
The fable
The hare always made fun of the tortoise for being slow so they decided to have a race and the fox was their judge. During the race, the hare was already ahead but decided to rest a bit to wait for the tortoise to catch up and fell into a deep sleep that lasted for hours. Unbeknownst to him, the steady-going tortoise already passed him. By the time he woke He rushed to finish the race but the tortoise won hence the saying 'slow and steady wins the race'.
Moral lessons from the fable
**1) Slow and steady wins the race:** if you're persistent, consistent, and take one step at a time, you'll be better off than someone carefree and fast.
**2) Overconfidence:** The hare could have won, it was obvious but he lost because he was carefree and decided to sleep. He underestimated his opponent. Even if you're talented than your opponent, humility is still required.
Growing up, I always saw examples of this story in real life. There is always this extremely smart person who doesn't read as much as she should, her classmate who isn't as smart as she is would get better results than her. She was overconfident but someone else with determination had overcome her.
It's saddening that the exact opposite is happening these days.
Real-life illustration
The **tortoise**
Bola finished at a Federal University, she struggled to make a first-class, shuffling 2 jobs to pay her bills. She often volunteered and did everything within her means to build up her curriculum vitae. Her parents had no 'connection', this means someone in a higher position to help. She was desperate for a job and she was qualified enough to use her degree to get one.
The hare
Maria finished at the University of Toronto, Canada. She was sheltered all her life, her parents are influential and she even went to the best secondary school in Lagos. She was expected to come back to Nigeria to work as per her agreement with her parents.
The fox
In this fable, the fox represented the judge, here it represents the CEO of the company that both Bola and Maria had applied.
The job had required some of the few skills Bola had, her interview had been flawless, they were impressed by her intelligence and what she had to offer. It was clear that Bola had a passion for the Job.
Maria told her parents that she didn't have time to come to the interview in Nigeria as she was busy at that moment. Her parents pulled plugs for the interview to be held online for her. She didn't have what they wanted, it was clear.
Unluckily for Bola, Maria's interview had only been a formality. The CEO of the company was Maria's father's friend. It had been decided right from time.
This is one example where being resilient and smart like the tortoise doesn't matter. Bola had been slow because she didn't know anyone to help her in the company.
The real world prefers someone who can get the job done fast. A company prefers someone who can get them to make profits on time, not someone who will spend ten years making a single profit.
The real world prefers someone who has a figurative long leg like the hare, long leg means 'connection', someone like Maria who has someone in high places.
Foxes these days don't judge fairly, they practice nepotism these days, in real life especially these days, the hare would have won because the fox would be biased because the hare was more skilled or that the hare's mom is friends with the fox.
The real world isn't fair.
Beginning of this year, I had to secure an internship placement, I and my friends went to several companies to apply, some asked us before we dropped our letters if we knew anyone in the company, we said no and they told us not to bother applying. Most told us that they'll get back to us, they didn't, when we contacted some, they said they were not accepting interns yet only for us to see some of our other coursemates get accepted, they knew someone there who pulled the string.
Maybe there are still fair foxes out there but the unfair ones are more popular these days. I'm yet to see one. I paid a sum of twenty thousand nairas for three months to intern instead of getting a placement that'll pay me almost that amount every month or even interning for free.
It makes me sad when I think about this, I'm used to this system as I've started looking for an individual that'll pull strings for me for my next internship next year. It's annoying that everyone sees this as normal and there's nothing I can do about it. I just hope it favors me one day.
Have you had experiences like mine before?
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Thank you for reading
October 23, 2021
©Deeepensiverse.
The system isn't just fair.
Lead image by me.
In a country where so many things are wrong, we can't help but complain. I was emotional yesterday due to the memorial of those who died a year ago during the endSARS protest, the terrible outcome of yesterday's protest, and some other personal reasons. I'm glad my friends wrote articles about it here on Read.cash.
I just kept thinking that 'why are things so messed up in this country?' I heard heartbreaking news the day before yesterday.
So last year March, In my University, we had to go home for something we call ASUU strike, ASUU is called the Academic Staff Union of Universities, the government didn't fulfill the agreement to ASUU concerning funds to disburse and refusal to use a payment method called IPPIS by the Union. This led to the warning strike for 2 weeks then the outbreak of COVID-19 in the country which led to the lockdown.
The strike lasted most of the year till it was called off in November. We resumed Online classes in January 2021, the examination was conducted online for about 40% of us.
I didn't write the examination at my house because it was noisy, one of the rules we were asked to follow was that we were supposed to write the exams in total silence. Nobody else was expected to be in the room while we wrote it which was impossible because I lived with my little cousins. I had to pay to write it in a noise-free environment.
Different proctors invigilated the exams. There was a particular exam that I wrote, I sat with other people that wrote exams there, I didn't realize that from where I sat that the webcam saw someone near me. The proctor questioned me about it, she asked who was near me, I explained that I was writing at a centre and that it was a fellow examinee.
While she was talking, I heard a man's voice near her, another proctor perhaps, he told her to flag my account. He said he didn't understand why she was asking me so many questions. I started pleading, almost crying, raising my voice to the detriment of the other examinees in the room. The woman took pity asked me to log out and move in a way that she won't see the other girl. I quickly did as she said and the issue was resolved. I remember how relieved I was to hear that. I tiptoed throughout the exam.
Some weren't so lucky to meet a proctor like mine. I have a coursemate who was among the unlucky ones. His Laptop was faulty during the period of examinations so he had to borrow his cousin's laptop. The borrowed laptop wasn't working at first so they tried all they could for it to work. When he started the examination, his cousin wasn't aware and peeped from the window to see if all was well. He tried to tell his cousin off and the proctor asked him who was in the room with him. The proctor demanded to see the room where he was and he raised his laptop to show that no one else was in the room.
He later found out that he couldn't access the student's portal after examinations, he wasn't aware that the proctor had flagged his account for malpractice. We were worried, everyone in the class could vouch that he didn't do it. This was someone that didn't think it was necessary to use google during online tests that no proctor was monitoring. He was all about reading books, he's someone that would have finished the course outline halfway into the semester.
When we resumed the second semester, he had to face the School's Panel. For weeks, nothing was said, he wasn't able to register for his courses, he couldn't write tests because they were held online on a portal that he couldn't access because of the ban on his account. We were all worried for him. The registration of courses on the portal closed, they had still not given him the verdict.
A few days to our first examination, the ban was lifted from the portals of people who were accused of malpractice so he was able to register for his courses. He wrote exams and we thought everything was settled, there was even a letter that was sent to him that stated that he was cleared of all charges. We rejoiced with him, I was genuinely happy for him, he had been through a lot. Our joy was however short-lived as a few days ago, a letter dated September 21st was sent to him. It stated that he was found guilty and was rusticated for one semester, it also stated that the exams that he wrote for the whole first semester were canceled.
Our course adviser suggested that he repeat the year instead of advancing to the next year because he won't be able to cope with the workload. He won't be joining us in year 3.
I was vexed for him, so many people wrote the examination under intense malpractice but weren't even exposed, an innocent individual was scapegoated.
It just wasn't fair.
I'm sad for him, he lost his mom in 2o20 and now this is happening.
The system isn't just fair, I kept wondering about how it could have been me if the female proctor had listened to the male proctor.
He can't complain, there's no student body to complain to. The dean of student affairs can't do anything either. We can't protest too, he just has to accept it.
Why would you tell him he was cleared of all charges if you wanted to rusticate him? It just doesn't make sense to me.
I hope that he will be fine despite all these problems.
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October 21st, 2021
©Deepensiverse.
I was so sad today but seeing the renewal of your sponsorship lightened my mood, thank you @greatwolfman, I really appreciate it.
My first crush
Lead image by me, other images from Unsplash
Siri, play me Euphoria by BTS
I'm confident about writing this because I know well that he won't get to see it but for Anonymity, I'm still going to name him Ace.
I don't quite agree with Romance novels at times but in terms of describing feelings of someone who liked another, I think they are fairly correct, I felt that way. I didn't know that was it then but I grew up to realize what I felt at the time.
This happened in the last year of Primary School, Primary six. My closest friend at the time was a Boy, I'll name him Brock. Brock was Ace's neighbor/ friend which made me and Ace sort of close.
Ace wasn't in our school but we were the same age. I think I was ten years old when this happened. I knew I liked talking to Ace, I looked forward to going to Brock's house for assignments. I thought Ace was cool at the time.
Anytime I saw him, I felt nervous, we had conversations but it always felt like a cat got my tongue. I did most things and said some things I said just to impress him. My heart did this double flip when he was near, I looked forward to the closing time of each day because I knew I would see him. I was extremely shy. I fidgeted at the thought of him, thinking about him then, made me smile.
Sometimes, I was speechless, sometimes I would hyperventilate when he was near.
Thinking about it now, it was crazy.
This went on for a while till my other close friend, Benita told me that Ace had asked her to be his girlfriend, it was like my little world came crashing down. I was furious, I had thought Ace liked me, different questions kept flowing through my mind.
Why her and not me?
What did she have that I didn't?
I was furious but I didn't play dirty. I advised her that if she really liked him, she should say yes. I'm proud of that, I have been a rational person right from childhood. She agreed and started dating him. We were all 10 years old then, the way it played out, one might think we were we're teenagers or something.
His parents had just come back from America, so he spoilt her with exotic chocolates and gifts, she would always show them to me. Going home from school, Brock and I would always wait for them at one corner while they talked because we went home together from school.
I was jealous but I could do nothing about it. I had home lessons after school and Benita always joined me in my house, I would always ask her about Ace, and thinking about it now, I think she knew I liked him.
So one fateful day, while discussing Ace, as usual, Benita told me that Ace wanted me to come to his house alone. I started fidgeting, I asked her what she thought that I should wear, I asked her if my jeans looked pretty and if my shirt was decent.
She didn't respond so I looked up at her and she asked me "You like Ace right?"
I was embarrassed, I denied it but we both knew I was lying, the awkwardness was saved by the timely arrival of our lesson teacher.
I don't know how or when the feelings evaporated, I think it was because I felt disgusted that I could have liked my close friend's boyfriend that much.
The last time I saw Ace was when I was twelve, the conversation we had was purely platonic.
When I think about Ace now, I laugh, it was one of the highlights of my primary school. This happened over 10 years ago, So I decided to share this beautiful moment.
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**Fun fact: I played euphoria by BTS throughout the writing of this article.**
Why Euphoria? It's a song about being in love. I must have felt like that at the time.
The first verse goes https://www.google.com/amp/s/genius.com/amp/Genius-english-translations-bts-euphoria-english-translation-lyrics
*You are the sunlight that rose again in my life*
*A reincarnation of my childhood dreams*
*I don't know what these emotions are*
*Am I still dreaming?*
*There is a green oasis in the desert*
*A priori deep inside of me*
*I'm so happy, I can't breathe*
*Everything's getting blurry*
You can watch it here.
https://youtu.be/zC_KsEiurvE
Thank you for reading
©Deeepensiverse.
I'm not lazy, I'm not just easily motivated
Lead image from Unsplash.
This is my entry to @JonicaBradley 's prompt #19
The definition of laziness.
*Cambridge dictionary defines being lazy as the quality of not being willing to work or use any effort.*
*Merriam-Webster dictionary defines being lazy as being disinclined to activity or exertion and not energetic or vigorous.*
According to here, Laziness is a state where you don’t want to do anything, you’re are totally unwilling to spend your energy. When you think doing a task is very difficult and even impossible for you this state is known as laziness. You desire to do nothing and remain idle like a lifeless body. https://medium.com/@girlsdunia2/what-is-laziness-15-actual-causes-of-laziness-know-why-am-i-lazy-ee8cfc8e816b
My parents definition of laziness.
My parents think laziness is not offering to work. They expect me to be actively working when I don't have school work. When I'm at home with the house sparkling clean, every chore done to perfection, watching a movie, or using the phone is laziness.
Can't I rest? Even if I rest for the next twenty-four hours, haven't I tried?
When I get tired, I go to the toilet to hide under the guise of using it then they call out to me and say that they know I'm hiding and call me lazy.
When I try to write my Readcash article at home is laziness, there's this common orientation that nothing good comes out from being on a phone or laptop. They don't know how stressful it can be at times to write an article.
When I say I'm tired, they say "the only thing you do all day is staring at your screen"
When I complain about my stomach, they say "when you laze around all day with your phone, you're bound to get stomach ache" and then I think 'what's the correlation?"
Nigerian parents.
What I think I am.
To me, I am a very busy person, I have to write articles on Readcash, I have a pile of novels to read, I have to keep up with the latest movies, Korean dramas, and American series. I have to find time to cook to eat. Then there's school's stress.
I'm more of a person who likes to do what needs to be done, I have to have an end goal to start work.
When I'm hungry, I cook.
When I need to pass my exams, I read.
After doing anything I need to do, with my extra time.
Sometimes, I just want to sit down without doing anything, without even using my phone, or just think about different possibilities. I want to be in this state for days, I wish I could be in this state till I'm motivated by another end goal.
**I'm not lazy, I'm not just easily motivated**.
According to here, LAZY means https://medium.com/@girlsdunia2/what-is-laziness-15-actual-causes-of-laziness-know-why-am-i-lazy-ee8cfc8e816b
L- Lie down
A- Aimlessly without any
Z- Zeal in
Y- Yourself.
Which coincides with my idea of just sitting and looking when I don't have an aim.
The verdict
So, I guess I'm lazy, we all can be lazy. It's okay to be lazy sometimes, when I have one or two lazy days, it helps me restart and think afresh which I think is a good thing.
So anytime my parents call me lazy, I'll reply that "according to my research, being lazy can be a good thing" wish me luck guys.
Benefits of Laziness
Laziness can be beneficial. It helps to increase efficiency, it can lead to a healthier, more relaxed life.
According to my research, these are some of the benefits of laziness. https://nesslabs.com/benefits-of-laziness
1) **Smart solutions**: Laziness can be a source of innovations. Frank Gilbreth Sr. famously said: “I will always choose a lazy person to do a difficult job because a lazy person will find an easy way to do it”
2) **Laziness can help to manage stress**: Activities or lack of activities that may be perceived as lazy by adults are necessary for the mental health of young people.
3) **Mind-wandering**: Laziness can help in mind wandering which helps our brain to process thoughts and help to increase productivity.
4) **Approach**: Acknowledging laziness can be a great way to better approach the task at hand.
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If you want to participate in the prompt, all you need to do is
Write anything on **laziness**
Write **100% original** content
Tag me @JonicaBradley https://read.cash/@JonicaBradley
The longer your article is, the more likely you will get attention from Rusty. I suggest **600 words** at a minimum.
**Submit** to **PromptlyJonica** (please **join** if you haven't already) https://read.cash/c/promptlyjonica-b4a0
Have **fun**!
OCTOBER 19, 2021.
Deeepensiverse
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The modern day prodigal son story
Lead image by me.
Joe was a typical Nigerian young man, he was sheltered, he went to the best secondary school and proceeded to attend the University of Lagos. Joe's father had wanted him to go to a private University that he was an alumnus of, the same University Joe's brother attended but Joe had insisted that he wanted his freedom.
Joe had the best opportunity, his father gave him more than enough money and paid for the hostel with one of the best facilities in the area. Two weeks into resumption, Joe complained of the long cab queue at the University gate to enter the campus, his father proceeded to give him one of his cars.
Joe had the best one year in the school, people knew him as the rich kid, they hailed him and swarmed around him like bees, one year of being called the rich kid got to Joe, his 'friends' often made comments like "if he's giving you this much now, imagine the amount of inheritance you'll get, too bad your old man won't die soon"
Joe let those comments get into his head, he started rebelling, he started having carryovers from having As and Bs, he started smoking hard drugs and getting drunk. His father was worried and called him to come home severally but Joe only replied with 'you won't give me what I want' and didn't show up.
Joe's father was worried when he was called around 2 am to learn that Joe had been in an accident. Joe had been drunk driving, his father looked at him on the bed, he barely recognized his son, he hadn't seen him in months. His father was thankful that he only had minor wounds, it could have been fatal.
"What do you want?" Joe's father asked him, he wondered what his son could be so desperate about.
"My inheritance" Joe said defiantly
Joe's father looked at him and knew that Joe had made up his mind, nothing will change his mind.
Joe's father gave Joe the trust fund he had set up for him since he was a baby, it contained several million dollars. Joe took the money and went to America, he didn't mind his education. Joe made a lot of friends there too, they knew him because of his lavish lifestyle, Joe spent the money on everyone he knew, he bought hard drugs, alcohol, and everything he wanted.
2 years later, Joe's money had depleted but he had to keep up with his lifestyle. He proceeded to drug trafficking, was arrested, and then deported back to Nigeria. Joe was too ashamed to face his family, his friends he had helped while in the University refused to help him, they had an excuse. He worked menial Jobs that paid 500 nairas per day, he barely ate, the money wasn't enough. His employer refused to pay him for 3 weeks because of a mistake he had done, he had to survive on begging strangers for money.
He decided he couldn't go on like this, he begged a cabman to take him to his father's house promising the fee upon arrival. He knew his father stayed home on Sundays. During the journey, Joe didn't know how to feel, he would be happy if his father gave him a spot at the security quarters, his father's least paid employee looked well than he did.
When they arrived, Kabiru, his father's head of security was outside the gate at the time, Kabiru saw him and shouted. He motioned to the others to call their boss*,* his father ran out to meet him, he hadn't seen his son in years.
Both Father and son cried, Joe asked for forgiveness as he had been stupid, he asked for a place with the security guards.
His Father has replied "nonsense, no son of mine will stay with mere guards"
The best doctors were called to treat me immediately as he was suffering from malnutrition and undernutrition. His former room was prepared and he was fed and thoroughly taken care of.
This story is one most of us know, the prodigal son
The moral lesson of this story is that God is always ready to accept us back as far as we accept that we've sinned and ask for forgiveness. There's no big sin or small sin, the main word is repentance. Let's find our way back to God today.
Happy Sunday guys.
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Relationship talk #1: Going Dutch or??
Lead image by me.
I was thinking about what to write yesterday when I thought of the series 'the smart money woman' by Arese Ugwu. There was this scene that Tami's date, Andrew, told Tami that he expects that the person that initiated the outing should be the one to pay.
What do you think? Do you prefer Going Dutch? What do you think determines this?
Going Dutch
Casually, going Dutch means splitting the bill, it can also mean paying for your own share.
I think going Dutch is more common in the western world.
The big question
**For Ladies**
If you were asked on a date, would you expect the guy to pay? Would you want to go Dutch? Do you mind paying? Would you offer to pay? What of subsequently? Second or third dates. Do you mind splitting the bill then?
If you suggested the outing, would you expect him to pay? Would you split the bill? Would you insist on paying? Would you offer to pay? What of subsequently too?
**For Guys**
If you ask a lady out, would you want to pay? Would you want to split the bill? What if she offers to pay, would you allow her to pay? Does the same rule apply to subsequent dates?
If she asks you out or suggests it, Would you expect her to pay? Would you insist that you pay? Would you suggest going Dutch? Does it apply on subsequent dates?
The survey
I decided to conduct a little survey of my own, I asked some of my friends and these are some of their replies.
**Guy A** believes that if he asks a lady out, he's definitely paying, he insists that for the first few dates, he will definitely pay, when the relationship gets serious, they will discuss going Dutch. He also said if he was asked out by a lady, he would definitely insist on footing the bill.
**Lady B** believes that a guy should pay if he asks her out but will not rely on that and take enough money with her and If she was the one that suggested it, she would expect to pay but wouldn't argue if he insists.
**Guy C** doesn't mind if the lady pays if he asks her out and expects the lady to pay if she was the one that suggested it.
**Lady D** believes that a guy should be the one to pay but she'll discuss it with him before the date in case she can't afford it She also believes that she should pay or go Dutch if she suggests the outing.
**Guy E** thinks that he should pay if he was the one that asked her out but they could split if she insists and if she was the one that asked him, he could pay or split if she insists.
**Lady F** feels that the guy should pay on a first date and she should pay if she invites him out but won't oppose if he insists that he wants to pay. She advises a girl to always prepare to pay in case of anything.
**Guy G** strongly believes that he should pay because he thinks he's a gentleman and that if a lady should ask him out, he would offer to pay but expects her to insist on paying as she was the one that suggested it.
**Guy H** said that he should be the one to pay if he asks a lady out but if she asks him out then she should pay or they could decide to go Dutch.
**Guy I**
Thinks that it's only normal for him to pay if he asks a lady out but if she insists on paying, he won't stop her and if she asks him out, he'll try to discuss the person footing the bill.
What do you think of the opinions above? Do they align with yours?
I agree with Andrew, I feel that the person that initiates the outing should pay, it's just easier and much simpler that way. Then if we decide to split the bill, that's also cool.
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Today was really fun, I spent the little time I had asking people these questions, I had fun arguing with them.
Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed it.
Marriage worries me.
Lead image by me.
Marriage.
*The state of being united as spouses in a consensual and contractual relationship recognized by law- Merriam Webster*
A word that used to be so thrilling, suspenseful. I always anticipated getting married when I was younger.
Maybe I'm still suspenseful but it's sort of unsure, I don't know what to expect, is it going to be horror or should I expect flowers and sunshine?
Is it as bad as people say it is or as good as some claim it to be?
My worries increase every day because people around me seem to direct marriage remarks and questions at me. The other day, this woman looked at me and asked me if I've started praying for a husband. Everything I do these days is followed with "is this how you'll do this in your husband's house?" "Is this how you'll act around your in-laws?"
If you're a Nigerian girl in your 20s, you can most definitely relate to what I'm saying.
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My worries
**Firstly**, the popular one we all know, abuse. I know what you expect me to say is the usual husband abusing their wives but do you know some wives beat their husbands? This has happened right before me, no jokes.
There's this Couple living where I stay at the moment, I don't know what exactly caused the whole thing but the wife poured hot food on his face and started slapping him, he retaliated and they started hitting each other, the teenage children then held the Father when it seemed like he was winning so that their mother would get more blows in, he was also pushing the children away so he could beat her more. This went on till one of our neighbors went to separate them.
It was a mess, such a dysfunctional family.
I also know someone whose husband beat her so much that she almost had a miscarriage, the baby was saved by the timely intervention of her neighbors.
I definitely don't want to become someone's punching bag.
**Secondly**, imagine you marry someone who doesn't abuse you, does everything you expect him or her to do but cheats a lot. I've actually talked to someone about this and she said it doesn't matter, it's okay as long as he doesn't displace her.
People sort of turn a blind eye to this. Presently, according to my source, Nigeria has the second-largest HIV epidemic in the world, 1.9 known people are living with HIV in Nigeria and many other people living with HIV do not know of their status. https://www.avert.org/professionals/hiv-around-world/sub-saharan-africa/nigeria
I know of someone who contracted this virus because his wife cheated on him with someone who had HIV.
Apart from that, imagine taking a DNA test for your children and discovering they aren't yours due to your wife's infidelity, discovering that your husband has other children, or going through your partner's phone and discover that he or she is seeing someone else.
I can't imagine the extent of the pain
**Thirdly**, falling out of love.
I'm a big sucker for love, people that know me well know this, I love love, I believe in forever, it scares me that after getting married and pledging forever at the altar, we'll just decide to separate or he'll tell me he doesn't love me anymore and fall in love with someone else. It scares me that we'll fall out of love and be forced to live together out of duty and supposed forever.
Do you think my worries are valid?
I know I mostly focused on the negative stories and I know that not all marriages are like this but you have to agree that news these days isn't encouraging.
I thought of all these today and decided to write about this, as I was writing this article, I thought of this verse in the Bible
*Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for*
So, I write this hoping to come back to read it later with the realization that I had been wrong, that marriage is the best thing that has happened to humanity.
As the verse said, I have cast all my cares on him and I know he knows his will for me.
Thank you for reading
First time I went exploring: ALMOST kidnapped
Lead image by me.
I promise you that this isn't a sad story, don't start to pity me just yet. This is in fact one funny story.
The keyword is **ALMOST.**
Well, growing up, I never had the opportunity to go to places on my own, my dad or my mom always drove me there. It's not like I didn't like exploring, I lived in this estate and my house was far from my secondary school. My mom drove me to school, I always got back home from school very late hence no time for exploring. Saturdays in my house then were for work, you know how Nigerian parents do, I had to put my cloth in the washing machine, cook, sweep, basically make the whole house sparkling.
By the time we finished, I would have either been too tired to do anything or would be in the mood to watch a Korean drama.
Then Sundays are for church, we get back to cook the usual Sunday rice, then do School's assignment or watch television.
My point is that I had no time to go out on my own.
Fast forward to this fateful year, this was November 2017, I'm not sure of the exact date. I remember vividly that I just finished secondary school that year and I was trying to secure admission to the University for Pharmacy, I think I missed the cut-off by 0.6 points and a professor at the College of Medicine asked me to come to her office to see if she could help.
I went to see her and at the end of the day, the outcome was unsure as I didn't know if it was going to be possible at that time.
When I left there, I was sad and decided to lift my mood by exploring the area, I planned to walk to my house. The college of medicine wasn't so far from my grandma's apartment where I stayed.
The whole plan would have been flawless and well-executed except I didn't know the way, I've passed the area by a vehicle previously but I haven't exactly walked around there before.
**The exploration**
I told someone about this and he called me "Dora the Explorer" that was a very terrible joke but I think I deserved it.
I started my journey and as I passed, the bike men called out to me, asking where I was going, I ignored them and I walked.
As I walked, I got to a point that I didn't recognize, I wasn't sure If I should keep going straight or turn.
I stopped to ask someone and she told me to keep going. After a while, I asked another person and she looked at me like I had two heads.
The conversation went like this
"Good afternoon ma" I approached her
"Good afternoon oo, wetin you wan buy" she asked me what I wanted to buy.
I told her where I was going and the best route there.
She looked at me and said "you no know say dem dey kidnap people for this area" she asked me if I wasn't aware that people get kidnapped in the area.
I said, "no ma, are you serious?" I was saying these words with so much fear, I still remember how scared I was.
The man beside her said, "she still dey ask say we serious" he meant that I was still asking if they were serious.
Panicking, I asked them what step to take and they said "hurry hurry, take a bike"
I was scared to take a bike around that area, I kept thinking "what if I enter a kidnapper's motorbike?"
I ran back to the place I was supposed to take a motorbike at the speed of light, my speed could have rivaled Barry Allen's own.
The more scary thing was that the motorbike passed the same spot the supposed kidnappers were, you can imagine how I felt at the time.
Conclusion
Now that I think about it, I feel they could have been joking, If I could relive that day, I would have still done the same thing, I don't think I want to confirm if it was a joke or not.
If it had happened to you, do you think that if you relive that moment, you'll want to defy those people and find out if they were joking or not?
The funny thing is I've passed that same area almost every day past one month and I still think about that incident and laugh, I still passed there today.
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Forgetfulness
For those that wear glasses, have you ever looked for your glasses for a while only to discover that you were wearing them all along or enter a room to take something only to forget what you wanted to take?
I think it's common to forget things occasionally.
My friend messaged me last week and said " I need to do something about forgetting stuff" and I said "it happens to everyone" so I decided to write this article.
*Forgetfulness is a persistent failure to remember. It results from changes in the brain and can be a normal part of aging or a symptom of another condition or disease.*
*Source**.* https://www.healthgrades.com/right-care/symptoms-and-conditions/forgetfulness
Causes of forgetfulness
Forgetfulness can arise from stress, depression, lack of sleep, or thyroid problems. Other causes include side effects from certain medicines, an unhealthy diet or not having enough fluids in your body (dehydration). Taking care of these underlying causes may help resolve your memory problems. Source. https://newsinhealth.nih.gov/2010/02/things-forgotten
Forgetting things can be attributed to two things:
**1) Normal Memory Problems**
**2) Alzheimer's disease**
**1) Normal Memory problems**
According to health.harvard.edu, healthy people can experience memory loss or memory distortion at any age, It's normal to forget things from time to time, and it's normal to become somewhat more forgetful as you age. https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/forgetfulness-7-types-of-normal-memory-problems
**Types of normal memory problems**
There are 7 types of normal memory problems
**A) Transience**: This means forgetting facts or events over time. Memories that are used are less likely to be forgotten, brain scientists refer to this as beneficial because it clears the brain of unused memories, making way for newer, more useful ones. Just like the way we clear some of our phone's memory to make space for other things.
**B) Absentmindedness**: This occurs because of lack of attention due to distraction. Lack of Focus when doing something doesn't allow the brain to encode the information properly leading to forgetfulness.
**C) Blocking**: This is the temporary inability to retrieve a memory. The most common example of this is when the answer is at the tip of your tongue but you can't just remember it.
This still happened to me last Monday, I was asked a particular question, I knew the answer but at that moment, I couldn't remember it.
**D) Misattribution**: This means falsely attributing memories. As we get older, this happens. This is why causes the mixing up of names. With misattribution, you can actually remember the memory but misattribute some details like name or place.
**E) Suggestibility**: In this type, the suggestion fools the mind into thinking it's a real memory, it might have been information that was learned about an occurrence that stays as the memory of the incident even though you didn't experience those details.
**F) Bias**: Our memories are mostly filtered by experiences, beliefs, mood, and previous knowledge and this affects how our memories are encoded in the brain.
**G) Persistence**: this is the persistence of memories. Most people worry they can't forget, these people wish they can forget some of their memories. This is common among people that have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and depression.
**2) Alzheimer's disease**
Alzheimer's disease is a progressive neurologic disorder that causes the brain to shrink (atrophy) and brain cells to die. Alzheimer's disease is the most common cause of dementia — a continuous decline in thinking, behavioral and social skills that affect a person's ability to function independently.
Memory loss is the key symptom of Alzheimer's disease. Early signs include difficulty remembering recent events or conversations. As the disease progresses, memory impairments worsen and other symptoms develop.
Alzheimer's disease is more common in older people. It occurs in younger people when there's a genetic mutation. Source. https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/alzheimers-disease/symptoms-causes/syc-20350447
Ways to prevent forgetfulness
These are just common things you can do to prevent forgetfulness
Eat healthily
Physical exercise
Stay socially active
Sleep right: avoid taking caffeine close to bedtime
Avoid smoking as it speeds up memory loss
Be mentally active
Be socially active
Write down things you're likely to forget
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If I were magical
Lead image by me.
I'm sure most of us as kids fancied magic, I was always amazed at how things could be done by sheer words or by the movement of hands. Needless to say, I watched a lot of magic-embedded movies.
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*Merriam-Webster dictionary defines magic as the power that allows people (such as witches and wizards) to do impossible things by saying special words or performing special actions; the use of means (such as charms or spells) believed to have supernatural power over natural forces*
My fascination with magic started from children's fairy tales, watching Cinderella's fairy godmother magic Cinderella, reading about the frog prince where the kiss of the princess turned a frog into a man breaking the spell of a wicked witch, or when the prince's kiss woke the sleeping beauty up.
In the part of the world where I live, the eastern world, Nigeria specifically, anything magic is frowned upon seriously. They are portrayed as evil, wicked and dangerous before I was born even till now.
Growing up, despite all these reservations that we have, I still watched and read fantasy. Twilight by Stephanie Meyer, Harry Potter by J.K Rowling were some of my favorites.
I got introduced to Burn for Me by Ilona Andrews last year by my friend and that completely redefined magic for me.
Ilona Andrews is Awesome, Burn for me in under Hidden Legacy series, you can check out the Kate Daniels series too, equally amazing.
In my head magic is categorized into 3:
****1) The cool magic:**** Hidden Legacy series inspired this category.
****A) Elemental magic****: the ability to command forces of nature
**Pyrokinesis**: ability to manipulate fire
**Aquakinesis**: ability to manipulate water
**Geokinesis** – ability to manipulate earth itself
**Aerokinesis** – ability to manipulate air
**Psychrokinesis** – ability to manipulate ice
**Fulgurkinesis** – ability to manipulate lightning
****B) Mental Magic****: This type of magic relies on the will of the user.
**Telekinesis** – ability to move objects with your mind
**Projection** – ability to transmit images and feelings to the minds of other people, for example, telekinesis
**Theriogenology** – ability to command animals.
**Harmonizing** – ability to arrange one’s environment to invoke a specific feeling or mood.
**Elenchus** – ability to distinguish lie from truth, also known as truth-seeking.
****C) Arcane Magic****: this involves using magic by reaching into the arcane realm, a magical realm away from our reality
**Enerkinesis** – ability to manipulate magic energy.
**Summoning** – the ability to cause the manifestation of creatures from the arcane realm.
**Animating** – ability to impart life to inanimate objects.
**Binding** – ability to fuse or bind something found in the arcane realm to a human host to give the host new magic powers.
Source. https://urbanfantasy.fandom.com/wiki/Hidden_Legacy_series
****2) The animal magic****: being able to change forms, in Ilona Andrews Kate Daniels series, there were were-lions, were-bears, were-wolves of course, there was pretty much were-anything including rats, mongoose, hyena
Being an animagus like in Harry potter also falls under this category.
*An* ***Animagus*** *(pl. Animagi) was a witch or wizard who could transform themselves into an animal and back again at will. It was a learned skill, unlike the hereditary skill of a Metamorphmagus.*
*Source**.* https://harrypotter.fandom.com/wiki/Animagus
Being a Metamorphmagus also falls under this category.
*A* ***Metamorphmagus*** *(pl.* ***Metamorphmagi****) was a witch or wizard with the rare magical ability to change their physical appearance through sheer will alone, without the need of Polyjuice potion, or a spell-like most of the wizarding population.*
*Source**.* https://harrypotter.fandom.com/wiki/Metamorphmagus
****3) The Enchanted magic****: this includes being able to say a spell or power words in Kate Daniels series or even incantations. This can also include blood magic, magic amulets. Mostly actions that include magic that is not in other categories.
If I were magical
**If I were magical**, I would want to have the power to think about it and be it. It would be cool, It would definitely surpass any form of magic.
I would just think of shooting fireballs out of my hand and I would be pyrokinetic.
I would want to change into a were-lion and I would be it.
It would be that simple.
If I have this ability, it will come in handy when I'm writing exams, I'll just think of being a genius and I'm a genius. I'll be acing my exams without stress.
Imagine being able to think of any magical being and you're it, it's just amazing.
What type of magic do you fancy most or wish you could have?
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My thoughts on Covid-19 ignorance
Lead image by me.
My friend was telling me and my other friends about when she was on a bus shortly after the first Covid-19 lockdown was eased. She was the only person that wore a nose mask out of about 11 people on the bus. The funny thing was that the nose mask wasn't an issue till they saw a policeman ahead and the driver urged them to put on their nose mask so that police wouldn't fine him rather than wearing it to stay safe. They went on to talk about how Coronavirus wasn't real and hounded my friend in the bus on why she was putting on a nose mask.
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The people of the society
The people I mean in this context are people who refuse to follow the Covid-19 guidelines because they believe in some conspiracy or the other.
Frankly, I can't count how many times I've been harassed or close to being harassed because I chose to stay safe.
Some of the examples
**1) Firstly**, there was this day, last year, I was trying to enter a motorbike because I was late for my appointment, I was trying to negotiate the price with this bike man and he claimed he couldn't hear me, I spoke louder and he did hear me.
The man then went on to suggest that I remove my nose mask then he and his friend talked about how stupid I was for putting it on, they claimed it was only some government propaganda and went as far as trying to pull my nose mask.
**2)** **Earlier** this year, around mid-July, the institution I attend reported few cases of Coronavirus cases, we were all sent home to resume lectures online.
I was very pissed at this, I just wanted to finish my exams and move on to the next semester, we were behind by one year already due to the Coronavirus outbreak and ASUU strike( this was because the government didn't keep to their agreement, it's a very long story).
When I got home, people asked me why I was home and I explained that it was due to the few cases of Coronavirus on campus. They laughed in my face, they said the school was in cahoots with the government and that Coronavirus isn't real.
**3) I once** went out forgetting to use my mask, I had gotten halfway to my destination, I went back home to take my mask because there wasn't anywhere that I could buy when I realized that I wasn't on nose mask. People were looking at me with bewildered expressions saying "is the mask that important?"
I would have bought a new mask but there wasn't anyone selling around where I realized that I wasn't wearing a mask.
Are these theories true or false?
*We’re not just fighting an epidemic; we’re fighting an infodemic. Fake news spreads faster and more easily than this virus, and is just as dangerous -WHO(2020a)*
Some of those theories are that the 5G cellular network causes the virus or that Bill Gates uses vaccination by implanting a digital microchip that'll track and control people. There's also a theory that the virus escaped from a Chinese lab in Wuhan and that it was created by Chinese scientists as a biowarfare weapon. There's one that said the death rate was inflated or the virus was fake.
*Sources:* *this* *and* *this**.* https://allianceforscience.cornell.edu/blog/2020/04/covid-top-10-current-conspiracy-theories/ https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.646394/full
Whether those theories are true or false is not something that I'm not willing to test with my health, it's not something we should test with our lives.
As I was going out this morning, I barely saw anyone wearing a mask, as usual. All over the world, new cases are still discovered every day.
Screenshot source. https://www.worldometers.info/coronavirus/
All we need to do is wear a mask, use a sanitizer and practice social distancing, let's protect ourselves.
If you haven't taken the vaccine, please do to reduce the fatality rate.
I hope we all stay healthy.
Thank you for reading.
A trickle of hope
Lead image by me.
I remember feeling nostalgic yesterday when my 4-year-old cousin was holding a small Nigerian flag In her hand, she told me her teacher told her to bring one to school for the pre-independence day celebration, she was proudly waving the flag and showing everyone who cared to see. Check out the picture of her flag below.
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I remember when I was 12, I was always so excited for independence day, I would keep my green t-shirt and white skirt, I would wash it and keep it so I would be able to wear it and walk around my street proudly. I remember how excited I used to be.
I remember when I was in junior secondary school(JSS 3), Our civic education teacher taught us how to sing the Old National Anthem, it was written by Lillian Jean Wiliams and adopted on October 1st, 1960, it was titled 'Nigeria, we hail thee', it goes
*Nigeria we hail thee,*
*Our own dear native land*
*Though tribes and tongues may differ*
*In brotherhood, we stand*
*Nigerians all, are proud to serve*
*Our sovereign Motherland.*
You can check the remaining stanzas here. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nigeria,_We_Hail_Thee
You can check how it was sung here https://youtu.be/hyXxbSVES28
Today, the first of October is Nigeria's independence day.
*According to the Merriam Webster dictionary, a civil holiday for the celebration of the anniversary of the beginnings of national independence.*
This is the 61st year since Nigeria has gained independence.
*Merriam Webster dictionary defines independence as freedom from outside control or support****:*** *the state of being independent and the time when a country or region gains political freedom from outside control.*
I remember getting less and less excited as I grew up, maybe because I didn't understand why we kept celebrating it when it felt like we weren't even independent, it felt like a 10-year-old leaving his/her parent's house with no plan on how to survive on his/her own.
The time I felt all my hope disappear was the day of the Lekki Massacre, it started as a peaceful protest against SARS, SARS was a special anti-robbery squad that deals with crimes like Robbery, they were also very popular for harassing young men and forcefully collecting money from them. They used extreme force if the civilian refuses and even death.
On October 20th, 2o20, Nigerian Armed Forces opened fire on the peaceful protesters, this started around 6:30 pm.
I remember watching it from DJ switch's Instagram live that day, I felt my heart sink as all of my hope of a better country disappeared.
I remember grieving for people who lost their lives that day, I remember turning and turning on my bed, unable to fall asleep.
Image source: click here. https://www.indepthnews.net/index.php/opinion/3935-the-lekki-toll-gate-massacre-and-what-it-means-for-nigeria
For about a year now, I avoided anything that had to do with the news, I ensured that I was busy with other things.
I thought that it was better than hoping, hoping and hoping, and then ending up getting disappointed eventually.
I thought I had lost all hope, I thought nothing will make me believe in this country again, I thought that nothing will make me hopeful.
I've realized now that no matter how I try to quench the hope in me, there is still this trickle in me, there's this part of me that still believes that Nigeria will be better.
*Hope can be a powerful force. Maybe there’s no actual magic in it, but when you know what you hope for most and hold it like a light within you, you can make things happen, almost like magic. – Laini Taylor*
I know we have been disappointed severally, we're tired of this, we want a positive change in this country, not negative news change but I implore us not to lose hope, let's still hope and believe that it'll be better one day.
*In the Bible, Job 11:18-19 says "having hope will give you courage. You will be protected and will rest in safety. You will lie down unafraid and many will look to you for help"*
I believe that there's nothing God cannot do, I believe that if we keep praying and if we keep having faith that things will change.
Nigeria will be great again.
Happy independence day Nigeria.
Thank you so much for reading.
Double Standards
Lead image by me.
So I was watching a series called Bridgerton the other day and I noticed the way women were portrayed to be this holy being, free of any blemish especially when it comes to intimacy and the men are mostly ignored and even praised even when they do the exact opposite of that, nothing is expected of them, they just swoop in and choose their virgin bride.
Bridgerton is set in the regency era and I should think "oh, that has been a while, we're in the 21st century now, we're in civilization, we should have been able to drive that archaic mentality from our society" but then I think " this is the same thing happening now, no difference"
Then what exactly has changed? What then is civilization if the 'society' still judges women this way?
*Double standards according to the Oxford dictionary is a rule or principle which is unfairly applied in different ways to different people or groups*
In my article today, I want to discuss popular things that are happening in the society that should not be so especially in this century.
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They are as follows:
1) People they have been intimate with.
I shake my head and get annoyed when I hear about how men are praised and excused when they have a high number of body counts but women are slut-shamed for it, it doesn't make sense, it should not make sense.
I was reading @Jumper-01 's post about unwritten rules, you can check it out here. He said that women can't really come out to say the number of people they have been with. This is true because they'll mostly be judged for it, even by their fellow ladies which just puts me off. https://read.cash/@Jumper-01/unwritten-rules-32f848d2
For some of us that watched big brother Naija last year, there was this thing that happened with Erica and Kiddwaya in the house, there was a video of them being intimate on national TV that surfaced on the internet and people started calling her names. I kept wondering why the criticism was only directed to her, I mean the act wasn't performed by her alone.
I expressed my displeasure then on my Whatsapp status, I am not one up for such kind of stuff especially on national TV but then maintain the energy when it comes to both of them if you have to judge them, judge them both, don't spare the man, don't give him a free pass just because he is a man.
2) Excusing cheating
I have heard people talk about this and I'm like " what is going on here?"
I was talking to someone about rampant cheating in guys and she was like "it's normal for guys to cheat, it's inevitable"
Why is it inevitable? It should be a vice, not something you get used to. It should not be normal, it should be inexcusable.
I talked to my grandma about this and she said something along the lines of "guys will always be guys", they have always been given this free pass right from time and it's not fair.
Then I talked to a guy one time, he came up with the excuse that guys cheat because they can but women do it because they've fallen out of love or something.
I've seen so many marriages that failed because the man cheated, leaves for a younger woman then he comes back after a while with his family members supposedly a changed man to beg the woman, she is then urged to accept him back and that he has learnt his lesson.
But when a woman cheats, she's qualified as so many names because she has done an abomination and the man probably moves on to marry another woman.
This is not true for everyone though, I have seen a case where the woman was mostly the villain of the whole story, I'm just saying what I know is most rampant.
I once heard of a man who left his loving wife for a younger woman in the name of wanting 'young blood', only to discover after the young woman had a child that the child wasn't his, he then came running back.
This is not me supporting women cheating in any way but I'm just happy because of the Karma.
3) That a man has to hide his emotions.
I feel this is extremely wrong, I have heard people say to men "Man up", " Don't you know that you're a man?", " Why are you acting like a woman" just because he is letting his emotions show, just because he's letting on about how he feels.
I hate the pressure the society puts on men, they set this bar or criteria of how a man should be and criticize them when they don't meet up to standard, it shouldn't be so, everyone should be allowed to feel a certain way.
This is one of the main causes of depression among guys, the struggle to man up, it's unfair.
4) Getting a job or promotion because of intimacy
For those who watched grown-ish by freeform, you'll remember that Luca and Zoey broke up because he assumed she got a particular job because of what she offered or has to offer her employer, joey badass intimately.
This remark is extremely common, a woman doing her thing, getting the bag based on the value she has in the company is being reduced to sentences like " who knows what she and the boss are doing? After all, she's a woman"
I am not saying that there aren't people that get jobs or promotions this way but now saying every woman that accomplishes something does this is so wrong.
In Conclusion
This change has to start with us, if we decide to change the way we address these issues as individuals, it'll change eventually because we all make the society.
Thank you for reading...
Myself, and insecurity.
Lead image from unsplash
Insecurity...
My dictionary defines this as “The state of being subject to danger; vulnerability.”
For me, it’s that moment when I hear gunshots down the street and my grandma, my sisters, and I rush inside and lock the door behind us.
It’s that moment when young guys on the street come out to do what they can to defend the street from intruders.
It’s that moment when I leave home to see broken bottles, vandalized cars that were parked on the street.
It’s that moment when I have the spend so much more money than I should because I can not pass a particular route due to riot.
It’s that moment when I have to cancel my plans because of the unavailability of buses or motorcycles due to the effect of the previous day’s fight.
It’s that moment when I have to cancel my plans because of the unavailability of the route and for safety.
It’s that moment when people on the street run to safety so as not to be caught in the crossfire.
It’s that moment when we wake up to hear that they looted so many people's shops leaving them in debt.
It’s that moment we can’t even sleep due to sporadic gunshots.
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It’s that moment the Police come around and throws tear gas at innocent people running for safety because they want to stop the fight.
It’s that moment Police arrests the young guys doing what they can to protect the street and demanding fees for bail when bail is supposed to be free.
It’s that moment we hear some passed away as a result of the fight.
It’s that moment that everyone has gotten used to, when we hear they’re fighting we just go into our apartments and lock the door.
It’s that moment we cry to God for protection because only he has made me and my family safe.
No one cares, the government doesn’t care, the police just use the avenue to enrich their pockets.
So sometimes when I think about everything I’ve been through, I just thank God for his safety net, I thank him for not making me or my family members dead or caught in the crossfire.
When I say I’m used to things like that, I say it in Faith because I trust the Lord to protect me.
Thank you for reading.
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To love and to be loved
*Lead image from unsplash.*
So I was watching a series yesterday, the lady and the man just started going out for about 3 weeks and suddenly he’s saying he loves her. I mean 4 weeks before that time, they weren’t even talking.
I was instantly pissed, I normally would have stopped watching it but I really liked the storyline.
It pisses me to see people use the word ‘Love' so casually, so many people who say it don’t even know what it means.
It’s euphoric when I watch or read a book and when the guy finally says he loves the main girl after a lot, you basically watch or read them fall in love. I cried one time.
But then these days, not only in movies, you see people who don’t even know what the word means say it and misuse it.
This generation mostly consists of people in lust or infatuation, they love the idea of love, they love the perks that come with it.
What surprises me the most is the fact that you claim to love this person and you’re cheating on him or her. Does love work that way or is there something I’m missing?
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There are some facts about love that keeps me wondering.
**Is love really blind?**
Does this mean overlooking the faults or being completely blind to them? Does it overlook the fact that they press the toothpaste tube from the bottom or middle? ( I heard a couple actually divorced cos of this), does it make you completely blind to how they snore loudly?
**Does love change people?**
Okay so, I want to attack the whole ‘bad boy good girl cliché here, I do not believe people change, I definitely don’t think that love changes an individual, as a girl, you know this guy is bad for you, you know he’s for ‘the streets' as they say, then you decide to be with him thinking he'll change, do you like being the guinea pig that much?
That’s just my point of view, though, has love ever changed your partner or someone you know?
**What do you think about the saying ‘beauty is in the eyes of the beholder'?**
According to what I know, this means that you might find certain qualities attractive and I don’t, how does that work exactly?
Taking this saying literally, does it mean you overlook the general standard of beauty and just go for the person irrespective of the looks?
**Does love conquer all?**
I don’t believe it does, in fact, I think that love is just one of the factors rather than the main factor, I believe that there are other things to consider.
I wonder why ‘true’ love stories have sad endings.
The perfect example that we all know is Romeo and Juliet, there’s also Titanic, the sad story of Jack and Rose, I still feel if Rose have left first, Jack would have probably survived.
As someone who has experienced love, I feel it’s a beautiful feeling, to be loved and to love, it consists of a lot of emotions, vulnerability, euphoria, gullibility perhaps, it can be overwhelming.
I wish you’ll find that person to love and be loved in return, if you have, I wish you guys the very best.
Thank you so much for your time.
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Did you dream about your dreams?
Lead image from unsplash
Did you dream about your dreams?
Dreams I mean in this context are your goals, ambitions, a visionary scheme.
It’s funny how this word was once foreign to me, I never thought about what I wanted to be growing up, I’m sure we all wanted to be doctors, engineers, pilots at a point in our lives but I’m referring to beyond that.
I mean that point when you start weighing your interests against your future, for me and my friends, the first determining factor was when we are about to resume senior secondary one popularly known as SS1.
In Nigeria, generally, high school/secondary school is divided into two.
The first is the junior secondary school(JSS), more advanced than primary school and a foundation for the secondary school, it is divided into three, completion of these classes qualifies you for the senior secondary.
The second is the Senior secondary school(SS), in most schools, you’re placed in classes based on the department you’re interested in and based on your results in the junior secondary school certificate examination and the result of an aptitude test that we wrote. These departments are Science, Art, and Commercial, some schools extract technical department from Science department.
I had no idea what I wanted to be yet I chose Science, I qualified based on both categories.
When I got to SS3( the final class for senior secondary school), it dawned on me that I really had to choose a particular field I wanted to study in the University( second determining factor), I was troubled, I started thinking of what I liked, my favorite thing to do then was reading and writing, it made me happy.
I started praying, I told my parents to pray with me, everyone was telling me that that singular decision could change my life and whatnot.
It now occurred to me that I have this strange thing for drugs, my friends call me weird for this but I love drugs, the idea of making one fascinated me, the whole creative process.
That singular discovery affected what I’m doing today and what I hope to be in future.
I know people that didn’t have it this hard, they discovered what interested them early on and that made them work really hard on it right from when they discovered it.
I’ve not met people like this but I think there will be people that’ll just see themselves in brown overalls and helmets and just figure out that they’re supposed to be in the engineering field.
Have you met people like that? Are you like that? How did you choose what you’re going to be or how did you choose what you’re doing today? You can let me know.
Exams: a gruelling experience
Honestly, I can’t be happier it’s over, some days I was really happy after the examination, some days I was sad, some I cried.
Why can’t lecturers believe us when we say we understand the course and not examine us or at least give us simple questions?
There was this exam I wrote, it was a microbiology course, we all knew it was German questions (fill in the gap) and prepared for it, I read a lot for it, then we entered the exam hall and saw about 105 questions, about 50 of it was theory (explanation).
I went blank for the first few minutes, the questions were familiar, it was something that I had an idea of but I couldn’t put pen to words at first.
Slowly, I started remembering some of what I read, little by little, I couldn’t remember all, much to my dismay.
Imagine my anger and frustration when I started remembering some of what I forgot as I was having my bath later that night, I kept beating myself up, I had to keep telling myself it wasn’t worth it, I just prayed and handed everything over to God and hoped for the best.
Some exams weren’t so bad, some were sweet like our Chemistry and French exams, it had me and my friends all smiles as we went back to our hostels.
I remember when I used to say I couldn’t read much at night, that I mostly assimilate better during the day, naïve little me.
I had to find a way to stay awake when there are so many things to read, I drank a lot of coffee during the last two weeks.
There was something I did that I made sure to never do again.
I had two papers the next day and I hadn’t finished one nor even start the second one, I read till like 10:50 pm or so and I decided to rest for a while, I woke up at midnight and kept trying to cover up the whole syllabus, I didn’t sleep at all as I went for the first exam which was around 9:00 am, needless to say, it was a mistake.
Our exams were postponed till around 11:00 am, as I was at the exam centre, I had a throbbing headache, I had dizzy spells, I had to use a lot of energy to keep my eyes from closing which failed terribly, I kept falling asleep, I am extremely thankful I managed to stay awake during the course of both examinations.
Even after I slept after getting back to my hostels, the headache persisted, it lasted for the whole day.
Some days I was moody when I think about silly mistakes I made.
Recounting these experiences is making me a tad bit emotional but then I just thought to share this with you guys, the reason for my absence the past 2 weeks.
You can share your exam experiences with me too, was it as bad as mine? Was it worse?
What was your worst exam experience? What was the best?
I wish the best to my friends writing exams at the moment, I wish success to all of us.
Hello friends, I just finished my exams(it was gruelling experience😢), I'll be active from tomorrow😁😁😁🤗🤗🤗
@Deeepensiverse
