Unhappy Family- who is at fault?

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3 weeks ago (Last updated: 2 weeks ago)

How much pain and suffering does a child have to possibly go through for him to grow up hating his own father, regarding him as his worst enemy?

How much cruelty and despair does a father have to lay on his children to become a monster in their eyes?

Who is really to blame? Lack of good parenting or a father's irresponsible attitude or may be the ungratefulness of the children.

Some days ago my brother came home telling me about the conflict that took place in his friend's house between them, their father, and their step-siblings.

Apparently, the father bought a new house for his third wife and her children but his second wife and her children who were not happy with the gift decided to let all hell loose on the family and the father. The second wife's children were even throwing insults at the father, calling him all kinds of names and even threatening to end his life.

(The father has divorced his first wife a long time ago though, so she is not currently in the picture)

All neighbors gathered and people around the community came to help end the fight because they all respected the man. People see him as a kind, generous, and gentle man.

How can such a man suffer such humiliation by his wife and his children just because he bought a house for his other wife and children?

While people show pity on the man while he sat down crying in torment and bad-mouthing his other wife and children for being ungrateful, I tend to look at things differently.

First of all, I don't believe a child will just wake up one day and start hating his father to the extent of threatening his life. I can't say much about the wife because women are unpredictable. Women can turn a switch on and off at any time and will give you the surprise of your life.

But a child to his father? No there has to be a tangible reason. Because some fathers can be total asses in their early marriage lives and parenthood and most only learn to change at a later period. For most when it is too late and the damage has been already done.

Most parents in general have no idea how to be good couples for the sake of their children or even how to be a parent. That is why I pity every firstborn of a family. Believe me, a firstborn's life is not an easy one. He is not a second parent to his siblings for nothing. He has to endure all his parent's trials and errors on him. He is like an engineer's prototype.

Therefore, The big question here is who is really at fault when there's an unhappy family?

I will give my opinion in my next article but what is your opinion here?

#DANLAWAN

SATURDAY 6TH APRIL, 2024.

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3 weeks ago (Last updated: 2 weeks ago)

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Women can turn on a switch? How about men lying cheating? How about till death blah blah blah?

If you cannot take properly care of the first family why start a new one?

I agree with you no child is born hating a parent (mother or father) which means this father did not fulfill his expectations, promises to the children who were scolding at him.

I don't know if I should feel pity for him. He left a family behind, dumped them and started another one.

This is exactly what my father did. His first family made all sacrifices and was next dumped. He started a new family and they received everything he denied the first. The second wife left him with children for an older and richer one and my father married again. This time with a woman who just like my mother paid for him and he gave us gifts paid by her. Btw he did not treat her very well.

I hope this father will see the light and/or his children can tell him, once calmed down, what hurt them most.

P.s. I hope that father will not make the same woman unfriendly remarks as you do! It's a sign of disrespect.

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3 weeks ago

I am not taking sides here, i strongly support anyone who is innocent or the victim. Fault may be from both parties. But nobody knows their full story. The second wife may have treated him bad in the beginning or it could be him who's treated her bad. But we can't judge anyone. Both women and men are not perfect. Sometimes the women are ungrateful and sometimes is the men that are just demons.

And I understand your own situation as well because i can also relate.

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2 weeks ago