Summer, and all the flowers are blooming so beautiful. Crowd cheering all around the field that i can't even hear the beating of my heart. In the wide playground, you were there, doing your best to make a goal with the soccer ball.
Exactly one month ago, we were strangers and by chance we got to know each other by a friend asking your mobile number. One month we had the chance to chit chat and built a feeling a normal teenager would feel. We came to a bet that if you'll win the game then we'll be officially dating. And it felt like God gave us that chance and you won the game and celebrated it in your home. Remember the feeling of being introduce to your mama for the first time and she even cooked food for use together with my cousins. There, I had the feeling that you were sincere to me. Time passed by too fast, until you even visited me in our home just to show some respect to my parents. how cliche it is...... We ended falling in love all over again. The usual feelings of dating officially.
2 years had passed and you distant yourself without any reasons. You left me hanging without saying any word. You shut the door and cut all the possible connections. Felt the sadness. Almost gave up. But then suddenly, you asked to see me. I thought that would be the last time to say hello but I was wrong. You asked forgiveness for ignoring me and asked a chance to continue our relationship.
Love is really happier the second time around. The next years, we played the part of understanding and loving each other. We were more open. Even my family loved and accepted you as their own. They supported us without any doubt. We get teases from all the people who knows us when would they attend the ceremony of "long table"?
That questions always lingers in my mind. I'm not yet ready or so do you. We never talk about exchanging vows for 8 years in a relationship. Yeah, we talk about building a family in the future but never talk about weddings. Or maybe we were still enjoying each other company as girlfriend- boyfriend. We were so comfortable with each other that we didn't even protected ourselves from possible heartaches.
Until such time, I need to be parted from you due to work opportunity. January 2021, I traveled and promised to finish my contract and go home. Well, you supported me and the a month passed by we're still good doing our daily routines. From good morning till goodnight with calls, and updates. Then, one time just like 6 years ago, you ignored me like I don't have feelings. You become cold and distant but this time I have an instinct that there is another girl involved. February 14, 2021 the special day become normal for us. March 10, 2021 my birthday came and still a normal day for you. You slept early without calls and told me that you're sleepy and tired. I understand that one caused I trust you. But as days goes by, you're even more distant. In a blink of an eye, you totally changed. And you expected me to accept it easily. Until, I had an urged to open your account. You had reacted and stalked one girl all over again in just one day but you didn't even visited my wall. You had a deleted conversation with this girl and i asked you about it. You even told me she's just a friend. And after sometime, you're no active in messenger anymore. Tried to call you but you're not answering and then one day "person is in another call". That shocked me a lot and hurt me like I'm already broken into pieces. I confronted you and there you said it. You both find ways for me not find out what's you're doing behind us. You become the comfort of the girl. did you even think who will comfort me while you're busy with her? Did you ever think what would be the feeling of the guy that you were comforting his girl?
But that time, I already questioned my worth. Am I not enough to be your best friend? Did I offended you to search for someone else? Is there something wrong with me? I gave all that I have. Support for every decision you make. Unconditional love. Body and soul. Trust that I even went against my family sometimes. Friendship that your friends can't give. Loyalty that even my ex'es didn't get from me. But why did you betray me?
at this moment, I'm questioning myself is it still worth it to get back to you? Is it still worth it to fight for us?