The Crypto.com Drama Continues
I wanted to offer a follow up to last week's article, Crypto.com's New "Instant Deposit" Program - Not So Instant. After combing through the fine print that you don't get from their marketing emails or from any direct links on the website, I found out that you can access your funds in no more than seven business days. This fine print is located in some blog that covers their new products that one of their customer service reps so kindly sent me so I can't take any credit to finding it.
The seven business days does not include your deposit date either, more fine print...
After seven business days I was surprised to see my "instant deposit" was still pending. So after chatting with their customer service rep Brooklynn yesterday she informed me:
"Today is the 7th business day and they will be able to transfer tomorrow"
I logged into my Crypto.com account this morning to once again see my "instant deposit" made weeks ago still pending. Not really a surprise anymore. So on this 8th business day I reached back out to Brooklynn who responded:
"I apologize for the delay, I can assure you that the transaction will be settled soon"
Well, at least she is being nice about it and can assure me. It is really going to happen this time. Four hours later I check again and, well you know the drill already.
"Our dedicated team have come back advising that the time has not passed an we are required to wait an additional day as the payment should be reflected tomorrow"
Well that is interesting - the time has not passed. I beg to differ. My calendar begs to differ. You own written policy begs to differ. After sending a message explaining how the days of the week actually work, I received another response:
"My colleagues have likely miscalculated the remaining days, and I confirm this morning that the transaction will be completed soon"
This has gotten pretty comical now and I'd love to know crypto.com's definition of "soon". If it is anything close to their definition of "instant" you can expect another follow up article next week, or perhaps next month, well hopefully this decade...
So here is the thing, Crypto.com is like a traditional bank in the fact that they are a centralized organization. Customer service used to be very good back in the day but now it is virtually worthless. Technology has rendered customer service reps useless in todays modern world. There is no problem solving anymore, only reps following a script with the inability to go off script and actually solve a real problem. You don't even talk to them anymore and if you do it is only after mastering a labyrinth of prompts and yelling "operator" or "representative" into the phone until you lose your voice. There is nothing more thrilling than sending a chat message and having to continually check the app so see if you got a response. Let alone, what that response might be.
Sure there can be problems with decentralized finance, and blockchains, and smart contracts, but the difference is that when things go wrong it is almost always on me. And that is something I can live with, nobody else to blame.
As for Crypto.com, "fortune favors the brave" but unfortunately you have to wait a very long time to access that fortune.
