@Corpsekunno
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Writing: Helps Me Manage Depression
Growing up, no one seems to really understand me and I don't seem to care. Whenever I open up my feelings, emotional issue and how I'm dealing with this mental health problem to my friends or someone i knew, they just wouldn't listen to me and tell me I was over dramic instead. It wasn't a big deal, I just laughed and say 'yeah, maybe i was'. To be honest, It's too much for me to carry and I can't think of any ways to deal with this pain that I've been holding for so many years. I've never been into Psychiatrist to treat my mental illness. Don't ask me about my parents, I'm a product of Broken Family. They didn't know that I have this kind of problem and even if they do, would they even care? I managed to handle my emotion by listening to a lot of songs by my favorite singer and bands. Too much to mention, I've always been a fan of Music ever since I was a kid. Letting out my emotion was never easy but i manage to let it out through writing a poem of how I feel. I actually kept a bunch of poem full with emotions but I'm too shy to share them. But this poem that I'm about to share is How Anxiety Feels Like
*Leigh (Corpsekunno)* *All eyes on me Or are they?* *Feels like mistakes that aren't mine* *Keep blaming myself anyway* *I cared too much for the world* *And it make me care too much for what they say* *My hair, my flaws and how i look everyday* *All these jewelries and clothes* *Supposed to make me feel secure* *And now I'm building up my thoughts* *That makes me feel insecure* *Make up on my face* *To cover up my ugly face* *And so I'll be dissapear without a trace* *How do I walk? How do I talk?* *My mouth full of word but why can't I talk* *So afraid to be wrong so afraid to make mistake* *'Cause this Anxiety told me everything that I can't take* *You're supposed to be my friend, you're supposed to be good* *But why do you make me feel that I can do no good* *Here comes depression* *Here comes another pain* *Would you just give me a rest?* *My life is no damn game!* *Depression feels like I don't care* *Anxiety feels like I put so much care* *And when they both comes into my life feels like a living hell* *I cry, beg for help but no one ever listen* *Now I tried to pretend and keep it hidden* *I just wanna run and be gone forever* *Because no such thing is happily ever after* *I am no princess, I am just a mess* *I wear black clothes, I wear no dress* *I pray to stars every now and then* *I don't wanna be locked up in this cage ever again* *I wanna fly, and go home to heaven* *And scream! "Father! Forgive me but I'm not a figther"* *Those dark days, I can't escape* *Feels like, I'm in hell burning my own faith* *But I have to keep living* *I have to keep pretending* *I have to hold on my every fears heart pounding* *I can't go on like this* *I don't wanna pretend my own happiness* *I wanna pull myself together* *Until Anxiety leave forever.* It wasn't good enough for me to be a writer but, In that ways I always feel a relief from within. If you ever experience and felt the same way I did. Write about anything. Let your thoughts flow freely because no matter what you write, I know I feel better after I do it and I'm sure you'll do too. I also have some strangers with me that help me cope with my Anxiety and Depression. Though I don't have Psychiatrist I have my online friends who's dealing with the same issue as I do and surprisingly, we understand each other, we even cheer up for one another. Even though we don't talk to each other more often anymore, they will always the best strangers that I've known. I'm glad that I found them <3 . End.
Hello, Corpsekunno here. I hope everyone is doing well, mentally and physically. If not, you don’t have to keep pretending that things are alright, let it out. You’ve been building it up and holding it for so long already. You don’t deserve that pain in your chest. You can write an Article about it. You are free to let out all the heavy feelings that you keep holding. You can consider me as your friend and friends support each other , I would love to read your stories my friends. Thank You for Reading 😊♥️
6 comments
I feel you right there.☺️ But to overcome what I felt inside. I just prayed to Him, my very best friend..😇 🤗🤗🤗
I will always pray to Him and tell him everything that I’ve been through and that what keeps me going through my life 😇🙏🏻
the poem says it all. it hurts! I can really feel how much emotions you have poured in writing it. anyhow, i'm glad you're coping up. I know it, you got this. wishing you well. always and in all ways.
Thank you so much, I appreciate you commenting on my Article and for the upvote 🤗✨. It was hard but I promise I’m Trying ♥️✨
And it's more than enough that you're trying. You're welcome. :)
It is sad when people take everything at face value and don't understand that depression is something that has to be taken seriously, it is a delicate issue that can affect the lives of many people, regardless of their social class, or how much or how little they have. I am so glad that writing is your best friend right now, and you have found peace in this world, writing heals the most broken hearts and the saddest souls, I know that words sometimes don't have the power that we wish, but I sincerely hope that every day you are better, that even if your day is grey and sad, you keep going, that music and writing are your biggest motivation and inspiration, never stop, never let anything or anyone become your obstacle or destruction, you are a strong girl, who can eat this world. I send you a big hug, I admire and respect you, you are a warrior, a fighter.