Hello dear readers and fellow members of the read.cash world, today I bring you a topic that is probably very common in conversations, as is the topic of love.
Almost every time I have a conversation about relationships the first thing we hear is how relationships are exalted and demonized, there are people who eagerly pursue them believing that they will be the solution to all their problems, and others who on the contrary flee like a fugitive who is afraid of shackles. The truth is that in different cases there is no clarity about how it should be the functioning between two sensible beings, who only have one purpose to be loved, because unfortunately and I include myself, we grew up observing bad references and premises of what should be a loving relationship. So much so that the rule is usually drama and the "healthy" relationship became the exception. So in order to learn what a beautiful love is, it is necessary to unlearn many things, in particular I disagree completely with this.
You have to keep in mind that when dating someone, we are dating their past, that many times when the person decides to tell us and in most cases we only judge. Forgetting that it's not only their ex-partners, it's their wounds, their frustrations, their desires and even the way they were raised. This also includes their level of self-esteem and the way they react to different situations in life. In the same way, this person is also face to face with our complete package, with the good and the bad that makes us up. In short, nobody is perfect and each one of us, from what he/she has, either with a lot or a little to give, will try to build a relationship with what he/she considers normal, but that sometimes is toxic, for example, manifesting his/her love through jealousy, attachment or with all those misconceptions that lead to consider as something natural that vicious circle of fight-passion-reconciliation-fight-passion-reconciliation.
The first thing to understand is that even if two people say they love each other with all their heart, it is not a sufficient guarantee to achieve a mature relationship, because the important thing is not that they love each other to infinity and beyond, but that they love each other well. And besides the typical feelings of affection, fascination and passion for each other, there must also be those pillars that are important for stability, such as self-love, trust, patience, good communication and emotional intelligence.
A true relationship is built between free people who do not need each other, yet choose to share a certain part of the path. No one gives up the things they like because they negotiate to reach fair agreements, there are no victims or abusers, they tell each other the truth without losing respect, they forgive each other and the common goal is to give happiness to each other. Some people learn this the easy way, others, like me, had to learn the hard way, nobody explained to me how to have a mature relationship. In general, beautiful loves do not happen by magic, or because destiny has prepared something fabulous for you as a prize, beautiful loves are built.
The positive thing is that it is never too late to start over and although you can't erase the messes of the past, you can do things better the next time around.
As humans we must understand that perfection does not exist, that there will always be bad times and even some people unfortunately do not do well, they lose the desire to try again, and on the contrary, in my opinion and I say this from my experience, we must not close our doors, we must take into account that we are emotional beings and our engine is to love and be loved, closing ourselves before the different situations only prolongs the inevitable and even wasting the opportunity to meet someone great.
If someone comes to read this article, I hope you like it, I have always liked to give tools to people, my only purpose with all this is to guide people and do not feel that only bad things happen to them or vice versa, I have always said that the word "life" has a very deep meaning, only some crazy people can understand that word, for me. It is a cumulus of experiences, whether good or bad, a total of everything that happens to us, that's why we must learn to live the moment enjoy it to the fullest, because they will not always be so good, or can be repeated. Happy day with lots of love 💕 a giant hug.