Often times as humans, we get into so many situations that warrant us to make certain crucial decisions, in order to elude it in good spirit.
But, most times, some of us tend to not be able to handle our problems ourselves. Rather than sitting down to tackle them, we are comfortable asking for advice from friends, and sometimes people that should have in no way known about your plans.
Now, I'm not saying seeking assistance or help from friends or family, is bad.
No!
But there should be a limit to everything that concerns a third party in our lives.
Everyone does not have to know about situations in your life. If at all they should, there should be a limit to it.
Do not normalize taking every advice from friends., No matter how loyal you think a friend is. Always learn to handle a lot on your own. When you have a problem, it's best you sit down, think, pray when confused, and seek out ways to handle your problems. I'm sure God will come to your aid in due time(but don't be too spiritual).
When we are used to asking people for almost everything in life, down to advice, or to even make decisions for us, We become irresponsible in their eyes. Whatever amount or iota of respect they once had for you, tends to reduce drastically. And this is because you let that be. You involved them in matters concerning your life that they should never have been involved in at all. If at all they should., Definitely not the way you did.
When we always have people talk us into things and our personal dealings, we often face problems like these:...
lack of self-confidence.
Taking paramount decisions on our own helps to build our self-confidence and strength too. But when we elude doing that responsibility and wave it over to an outsider, our self-confidence is little or nothing. And this isn't healthy enough for healthy self-esteem.
We are most likely to be forced in doing what isn't right.
Because we have no grounds on our own, due to so much outside help and imported ideas we always adopt from people. We are on the verge of doing what's always wrong because not everyone will tell you to do the right things. Especially some friends. And because you have always sorted their help and got it, whenever they want to mislead you with a bad idea, you will never notice and you will fall prey to it.
It downgrades you
Yes, it does. When we let our secret or private problems, open to some random people in the name of friends., Forget the help that may come with it. That person in question will think less of you, as unable to handle your personal affairs.
Your private problems become public.
When you are quick in telling people your personal ordeals, without filtering the most private part of it., Somehow somehow, if care isn't taken., The whole world will know.
I know a problem shared, is a problem solved., But not anymore most times. A problem shared can most likely be a topic of discussion for another set of people. Discussing your weaknesses and making jest of you.
Yes! It happens.
Inasmuch as we have great burdens, and we have an urge to tell our problems to someone. Be very careful who you tell it to. It's best you Edit and tells half of the story, keeping the most sensitive part to yourself, just in case you are disappointed Because disappointments are bound to happen (trust me I have experienced this)
Learn to stand on your own, this life is 100% your responsibility.
No one owes you any good advice. That is why it takes nothing for a friend or friends to betray our trust because we shouldn't have entrusted them with matters concerning our private lives at all(know this and know peace).
Learn to handle your problems.
Learn to handle your emotions.
Don't ever let yourself be talked into doing something. Always have the Mentality that you are responsible for your actions. Whatever it is. Good or bad.
You have yourself some to pay the price. It doesn't matter if the idea was yours or not. Since it's your life, it's your responsibility to pay dearly for it. That's why you have to settle down and think well.
✓To every problem in life, there are solutions to it. We just have failed to look deeper within ourselves, our minds, and think well.
When we are faced with challenges, go somewhere quiet and think. Task your mind. God doesn't give us problems that we can't elude or tackle. If our problems send us to rest eventually, it all means we lacked the concept of handling them. And that right concept of handling a problem can never be found in our friend's suggestion, mostly.
We have to brace up and be ready to take decisions in order to effect positive changes in our lives. If we can't take responsibility for what happens in our lives, single-handedly, at least up to an 80/85%
We seem unable to manage our chances of SUCCESSES since all we tend to put into use are nothing but borrowed practices.
Always learn not to share everything concerning yourself or problems with people. It's not always a good idea.
If you must do so, there must be a limit for everything.
Don't take ACTIONS when you are angry. You are most likely to do what's wrong because you aren't in the right frame of mind.
Do not rush taking decisions that have the tendency to effect changes in our lives. Take your time and plan well. Because a little mistake can make everything in your life Fall apart.
Boss up!
Take ACTIONS for yourself, and by yourself.
Don't ever be forced to do something.
Do things because you WILL it, and it is the right thing to do.
Do things because it makes you happy.
Do things, because there is a need for them to be done.
Don't do things because someone said so. That person has no responsibility In your life, and whatever results come from it., You face it alone.
Think wisely today.
Boss up.
You are your own boss.. don't be cajoled to live on the ideas, ideology, or Mentality of others.
Be different.
Be unique...
Think outside the box.
I hope this little article of mine, blessed you and helped you see the brighter side, why your private life and problems, don't always have to be made public before you get the answers you so desire.
That's why we have God, our maker to turn to when we don't know what to do (again don't be too spiritual)
He is always there to help you. At least, he is better than a million FAKE FRIENDS.
Choose your stand today,
And choose rightly.
Hope you are Candidly Motivated
All images are from unsplash.com
22 NOV 2021.
CandyBoy Chronicles
Yeah! I am my own Boss! Sometimes, people forget that they are their own people and as such they become reliant and dependent on other people which isn't always good. This article was well written. Good work!