Depression: My personal experience. Part II
I started suffering from depression when I was 20 years old. When my mother passed away I was in another city 12 hours away, attending college. My mother never presented serious illness or clinical complications, she was always a healthy woman, from one moment to another she began to present respiratory problems and in a matter of hours she died a respiratory arrest, her departure was unexpected and I did not have time to say goodbye.
My mother's physical departure was a hard blow that plunged me for two (2) years in the hell of depression; I was tormented by the guilt for not having been able to be by her side. At the wake I learned that at the moment she went into crisis and when the doctors were trying to stabilize her, she began to cry out my name in desperation. That is, my mother passed away calling my name, we had four (4) months without seeing each other or hugging. For two (2) years I was tormented by the guilt of not being able to be with her when she called me on her deathbed, I was tormented by the idea of knowing what she wanted to tell me so urgently; this led me into an abyss of darkness from which I struggled to get out.
On several occasions I attempted against my life, I reached a state of emotional instability difficult to describe with words, the nights were eternal, my brain did not rest in its thoughts (it was in constant activity), I had five (5) days without sleep and I decompensate. For two (2) years my life was suspended, I was hospitalized in a mental clinic for 8 months under strict medical treatment with antidepressant medication. I also started having constant panic attacks.
After 8 months of being hospitalized I began to show improvement, and then the doctors considered it convenient to discharge me from the hospital but with strict compliance of the medication. Gradually I abandoned the feeling of guilt that tormented me, however I still felt emotional instability, and I could only sleep with medication. I decided with all my strength to recover my life, so I began to investigate about depression, looking for methods that I could apply to overcome the difficult process I was living, , I started to play sports, to socialize, to write and to help children in a situation of abandonment through a charitable foundation and so little by little I was recovering my life, panic attacks also began to decrease and I resumed my university studies.
After a little more than two (2) years, they suspended my medication, although I had been told that it was for life; the doctors considered that it was not necessary to continue with the medication. Today I am a happy and fulfilled man. With confidence and courage I say that I am a survivor of major depressive illness. I believe in God and I know that He gave me the strength to overcome and move forward, for this I thank Him infinitely.
This article has been written inspired by my personal experience and I hope it will be of great use in your life only as a complement. Under no circumstances should the information presented here replace medical assistance. If you are going through a depression do not hesitate to seek professional help, do not allow the disease to progress, it is better to treat you in time, as well as it is better to prevent.
As I always tell you: Being happy is a choice, so always choose to be happy in spite of the circumstances and remember that after the torrential rain the sun is reborn. . Thank you for your support. I send you a big hug. Go to my profile and read my other articles, I know you will like them. See you soon.
