Books on relationships - 5 love languages
What You’ll Learn: A simple tool for understanding how people express and receive love. (SPOILER ALERT: Not everyone expresses or receives love in the same ways!)
Why It’s Good: 5 Love Languages is like the Harry Potter of relationship books: everyone’s read it (or they lie and say they’ve read it) and Gary Chapman is living in a secluded $100 million castle somewhere wiping his ass with royalty checks. This book has sold more copies than anyone knows what to do with, and it’s easy to see why: Short book. Simple premise. Powerful idea. And that idea sticks because it’s incredibly useful.
The idea is that people express and receive love in different “love languages.” Physical touch, verbal affirmation, gift-giving, acts of service, and quality time. A lot of problems in relationships occur because one person is giving love in one language (lots of gifts, verbal compliments) and the other is looking for love in another language (quality time, physical touch). As a result, the person giving the love feels unappreciated and the person looking for love feels, well, unloved.
I just summarized like half the book in that paragraph. But it’s worth grabbing. It’s like $6 on Amazon and can be read cover-to-cover in a single afternoon. But the ideas will stick with you for a lifetime. When my wife and I moved in together seven years ago, I bought her a copy and we’ve often had conversations about our love languages ever since. It really is amazing how useful the concept is.
What Kind of Break Up It Will Prevent: The relationship might not work out, but at least you’ll never complain that your ex never did anything for you… okay, let’s be real, you’ll probably still complain.