Why do we need a family ?!

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2 years ago

Today we will talk about the role of family, about its main purpose. I really like to argue with people on this topic, because everyone has their own idea of relationships, and more often they are false, because the institution of family has been destroyed. Let's rebuild it.

Recently I found a video on the Internet where yet another female psychologist in her interview gave this advice for girls: supposedly a woman should be inconvenient. I was immediately alarmed by this word "inconvenient", because inconvenience always creates discomfort and difficulties for other people. Why give this to your chosen one if you love him?

The psychologist, of course, explained that all this is needed in order to be interesting to a man, because a man is a breadwinner and conqueror by nature, and if he gets a woman completely and relaxes, then he loses interest, and love passes.

And in order to understand whether the psychologist is right in her reasoning, let's, in principle, ask the following question: why do we need a pair union, and that is, a family for people? What do we want to get from this project called love? Do we want to spend our whole life creating inconveniences for the other, so that he is in constant fear of losing us? Do we want to manipulate the feeling of "close - distant", so that they will become attached to us because of these manipulations, and not because of pure, sincere love? Or do we want something more? If so, what?

And then let's figure it out with you whether a woman should be inconvenient and why a family is needed for each person at all. The fact is that any energy investment in any business should bring the maximum benefit. Since the family means the costs of talking, helping each other, doing things together, experiencing and much more, then logically we should get something more from these investments that we would not get alone.

If the energy costs are greater than the gain, or there is no gain at all, or there is even a minus, then such a union is not effective, and this project cannot be called "family". Indeed, the name “family” itself is a very fair and effective creation. A project with a minus sign can be called "parasitism" with further destruction of the parasite's host and the parasite itself.

After analyzing many successful families, created for love, I came to the conclusion that the goal of family is to provide each participant with maximum realization by making periodic risks possible.

What does it mean? The fact is that each person has a need for self-expression and self-realization in society and creativity. If a person is realized, his level of happiness rises to unprecedented heights, and this is the main evolutionary and spiritual component.

But the fact is that self-realization often involves some risks. You must admit that all ingenious innovations are not created at once, but through trial and error. Only those who follow the beaten old path do not take risks. And therefore, a person must have risk management. And that is, an airbag, if his risks do not play in his favor, he will always be able to stay afloat. And in this case, the airbag is the family, that is, the second partner who can always pick you up when you fall and save your life.

And how does this family airbag manifest itself? As you might have guessed from the name: security. And that is, in covering the main human instincts and needs: food, clothing, shelter, and a feeling of unconditional support, love.

For example, a man decides to try his hand at painting. But at the moment he works as a store director. Being a lonely man, he will have difficulties in realizing himself as an artist, since he will not be able to go completely into creativity, because he will have to work as a director in order to feed himself and cover all other physical needs.

And if he has a loving wife, then she can take over his needs, while he quits his job and goes into the world of art. That is, a man has the opportunity to take risks, where he has 50% probability to lose and not become a great artist, but he also has 50% of the opportunity to become a great artist. (And even if he does not become great, then at least he will be happy and illumine his family with his happiness. Everyone wins.)

That is, we can conclude that there are three provisions of family life:

1. A person lives in a real loving family. Each of the participants provides the other with safety and comfort, stability and peace. On such a solid foundation in the form of support, everyone periodically takes risks and either wins or loses. The partner provides the other with everything necessary for realization, and if he does not win, then they have at least experience, if he wins, the whole family wins by 10 times. That is, the person goes into a plus.

2. A person lives alone. Since he provides himself with security, a lot of life energy and time is spent on covering his needs, and little time for risks. Often, such people live their whole lives in a quiet mode of work, not firing further than their noses. And if they do take risks, they are prepared in advance for this, which also loses time and energy, or they risk not so far and not so often. That is, the person is at zero.

3. The person lives in a family with an “inconvenient partner”. Such a person spends all his strength on manipulations, disputes, scandals, running after a partner, solving incomprehensible conflicts. He feels danger not only in society, but also at home, and self-destructs due to this increased stress. Life is like a stupid existence in dislike. Constant demands and fear of losing a person makes you work 2-3 jobs, and it does not come to mind about the realization of thoughts. Such a person goes into minus in such a family.

Therefore, summing up this topic, we can conclude that being an "inconvenient woman" is not beneficial not only for a man, but also for the woman herself and their children. When we create inconveniences for a partner, we can tie him up for passion, lust, emotional hooks, but we cannot talk about love. Men do not love such women, men are ill with them. And illness is always a negative phenomenon.

If you are interested in an effective loving family, then you need to be convenient, comfortable, understanding, and have a sense of empathy. You must provide your partner with a solid sense of stability and confidence in the future. After all, only on such a foundation it becomes possible to take risks and reach heights.

And most importantly, know how to look into the future, have strategic thinking. Being inconvenient you will meet an equally inconvenient, stupid man with mental disabilities. After all, only an idiot agrees to live in emotional swings. Such a person will become attached to you, but the sense from this union will be negative. He will go crazy, you will remain at a broken washtub, because you will be forced to live with an unrealized vagina-addicted man.

And if you feed a man while he is doing his own thing, then you will win in any case, even if he falls into those 50% losses. After all, an experienced, grateful, loving man will be next to you. Well, if he gets into those 50% wins, he will definitely take you to a new level of life.

I wish everyone happy families and fulfillment in them.

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2 years ago

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