Going Back to My First Love
People always say first love never dies, and I guess this is somehow true in this context. Nah, uh-uh, before you assume things—I ain’t talking about a person. My first love in human form is my childhood best friend, but now we’re doing fine as acquaintances. He actually seems like a brother to me now, considering as well that I served as an assistant to his mother in a given institution. I also have my own partner now. Thus, for this part, I’m talking about my passion, which despite failing a lot of times in this department, I still get back to, and that is writing.
Hello everyone, it’s good to be back here years later. My name is Thain, and as part of my warming up, I’ll tell you why writing is my first love.
1. Writing calms my mind and my heart
You know that feeling when you’re too anxious? Sometimes people bite their nails or shake their legs; it’s actually a way to make them feel at ease. For some people, they have comfort food—they eat and eat until they feel relaxed. For me, however, my kind of therapy is writing my thoughts out. I love writing because it helps me be at ease—the sound of the keyboard being hit every time I make a word. The words I can read and the finished product I can make. People say that I really have a gift for writing. Ever since I was a kid, I have already been writing—not just prose and poetry, but anything I could write. The most early memory I have is writing a Filipino paragraph on what we did during Undas, or All Souls’ Day and All Saints’ Day. Well, in the Philippines, it is natural for school to take a break for several days in early November and late October. This timing is parallel with Halloween Day in the West. I remember being praised for being the only one who knew how to make a paragraph, which is understandable since we were really in early grade school back then. So it is really suitable to say that writing itself has become therapy for me.
2. I want to document my memory
I am part of that silent coalition of daydreamers, and yes, I have a healthy imagination. People in normal circumstances have a lot of things going on in their minds every day. And some thoughts of mine—I consider them very important, especially when they are a piece of information that I’m trying to build somewhere. I, too, tend to forget things after a while, so I make sure that I jot down every thought I have that I consider important. Thus, I would also bring a pen and paper and anything that I could use to jot down info. Aside from this, since I am not wealthy, I value my gift—books or written info, especially those published online, tend to last for quite a long amount of time. For instance, what I write here can stay for a long time, as long as this app operates; this might always be present and available for all viewers. I thought that when I write for someone and publish it online, it can serve as my legacy or one that my loved ones can remember me by, especially during those times I thought I might not live for some reasons. So for those who want to leave a good message, writing is a recommendation. Words are powerful, especially those that are brought up with good intentions and with good substance—who knows, you might help someone.
3. I want to practice
Humans should evolve and learn as they grow. For a skill to be useful and for the gift to manifest in full potential, practicing is a necessary action. As much as I give credit to my early education that pushed me forward to learn writing early, I also knew that without practice, I could only write at a limited pace with limited ways of expression. Thus, I also take into account practicing in order for me to get better at my craft. I went back to writing because I also want to practice. Taking a rest for a long time has allowed me to realize that my growth became stagnant, thus one way to at least keep it going is to write continuously on several topics that would allow me to express, but also research should the topic be sensitive.
I also hope you guys value writing as well as much as I do. I am excited to write several articles again here in a consistent manner. Stay safe, everyone.
Everyday Life
Every day is a battle of whether or not to be productive.This has been proven time and again.And if you struggle, note that the people around you struggle too. Sometimes we are just blinded by the things we see on social media, which on most occasions are rooted in insecurity and the desire to be admired or noticed by the higher forms of people in society. I admit that I myself, despite being happy or alone in my world, felt this kind of pressure and insecurity too, which is why authenticity is seldom found today. Everybody wants to be somebody. Everybody wants to copy. Excuse those who do not agree, but I am convinced that we have all felt the pressure to conform in order to be accepted at some point in our lives.
I remember one task I’ve done for a client that talks about social norms and social rules that include conformity. It asserts that people will always have an impact on or influence the behavior of those around them.And as humans who cannot live alone, we have the tendency to conform; rare is the occasion where someone goes away from the pack and is a lone wolf. Although independence is a great thing, belongingness is another story. They aren’t merely the opposites of each other; to achieve independence or individuality, one must sometimes forsake belongingness.
As a result, I've pondered such thoughts.I suppose I can count myself as a member of a family, a squad or group of friends, a classroom, and other groups if I ever belong to one.But eventually I realized that, aside from the recognition of belonging to this group, there was still one thing required for somebody to be with the group—not a name but a connection. relationship with the pack. Do I have connections with them? How often do I get to talk to them? and my question was answered: "No, I don’t think I am still with them." I was, but not now.
People say there will be instances where we will be assigned to groups so that no matter how long you guys don't talk or see each other, their bond is still the same. I might agree at some point, but I cannot deny the changes. There will always be something between your relationship, or rather, yourself, and how you grew over time and how you treat them now.I'm not saying you treat them negatively or positively just because you and Guys haven't talked in a long time, but rather that you treat them in a way that isn't the same but still familiar.The treatment may be the same, but the person administering it may not be.
Quite a Narrative for a start
Hey guys! This is your angel, Thain. I really don’t know what to tell you right now. It's been a while since I wrote on this platform, and while I consider this activity giving me some cents, the relief I’m getting after writing out my thoughts is the ultimate benefit. And today, I really had a lot in my mind and body that I wanted to let go of and just be my own representation.
I guess since the pandemic took its toll, I've been a lot more procrastinating and lazy than before to the point that I have carried it on my routine in the first half of 2022.I’ve been too invested in things that seem real but are just a façade, and the craziest thing is that I can’t even react to those actions that were clearly mistakes or failed experiments. I just see it as normal, like it’s okay for that to happen, it’s fine, and it won’t hurt you that much. Like you know that feeling that you're supposed to freak out but you didn't. And some didn’t really hurt me as badly as I was expecting them to. It just felt okay, like no drama at all.
Maybe because it was just the idea of it being hard to let go of that had trapped me all along.
Those months were also a stage of loneliness and just wasting time and focusing on too much work—it was a stage of dying and not living at all; and where those reflections happen, realizations arise too. In the end, I awoke with a lot of truth being negotiable. Things that can be bent and easily tangled, and is regarded as merely ideas, thoughts, and decisions that cannot control us but may have an impact on the course of our lives if we do not act on our own.
I began to talk and just talk before realizing that what I was preaching was nonsense unless I could show them evidence. I've been realized that all along I failed to not recognize the power of working without noise, validation, and acknowledgement. On the shadow, it's just work and learning.
Friends have become busy during this time as well; priorities have shifted and schedules are no longer aligned.And, while things like this were painful, I learned that they are part of growing up and becoming an adult, and that there are still things to expect that may or may not happen to me depending on my choices.And I hope that I’ll always choose to do the right thing.
This sounds too short or something like a cliffhanger, but I’d just like to end here. I will post some contents later (maybe tomorrow) and hopefully in regular days. just doing a detox—a late one for 2022. Targeting this week as my first day of being toxin-free for the present year...
Dating in the Contemporary World
August 27, 2022
Hey, I’m back, after almost a month of being on hiatus.
A lot of things have happened to me lately. great things that have turned my world upside down and have forced me to make great decisions too.
Recently, a lot of schools have also opened for face-to-face classes. I’m afraid, but I feel pity for a lot of learners.
Students in high school who are unable to read properly; college students who struggle with grammar and comprehension.
While on hiatus, I was also exposed to life on social media besides blogging. It seems that those teenagers are much more lady-like than me. My eyes just continued to get wider as I watched how the numbers of their exes increased. I was with my best friend when I came across a certain someone, a 13 year-old teen with 3 exes already.
I don’t want to give an impression, but for old school and previous generations, these numbers really imply something. I could only imagine their brows twitching and their forehead lines becoming more pronounced as we discussed how the younger generation views love and dating.
My other friend has also enjoyed her time breaking and answering one of Twitter’s controversial questions. Such as things about dating and courtship up to the choice of who’s going to pay for meals in a restaurant on a date.
We came to the conclusion that, indeed, the Filipino system of labelling in relationships is far more different than the rest of the world.
For example, in other cultures, there’s dating before relationships and that dating is what allows one to properly decide whether they’ll call it official or not.
But in the Filipino teens of today... well, this is only based on what we observed, although there’s the idea of courtship, which these days is ceasing to exist. This kind of courtship is kind of disadvantageous to men and is kind of demmanding at some point.
Well, like men are expected to make the first move or to ask a girl out, and he’ll continue to do that till the time the girl has said yes to her, well that’s pretty traditional and lovely.
However, the disadvantage enters the frame when a girl isn’t clear about her feelings. Especially when we consider the length of courtship already, they'll be free to ask the boy to court them for any length of time: weeks, months, sometimes years; and then, after that, the assurance of the man's being able to be the girls’ boyfriend is still unclear.
Yes, courtship gives allowance for the getting to know each other part, but the right to ask the man to be loyal to you while you allow other men to also court you is not something I could swallow. And again, this is not applicable to all girls out there.
I mean, I get those who took it weeks before the girl actually said, "I’m sorry I can’t be with you."
But the years, well I’m sorry honey, that is way too long, and yes, a bad way to prolong agony. I don’t believe that the time it took to make it that long was all about deciding if you really wanted the guy. I mean, at the back of our minds, we always know what we want, or whether we want something to happen. It’s just that we’re confused most of the time. That’s why advice exists. Sometimes we’re afraid, but we always know whether we want something or not.
On the other hand, this lengthy course is also detrimental on the girls' part when we consider the "utang na loob" belief, which is the belief that when someone does you a favour, you are expected to give them something in return. When a girl doesn’t really want the guy but is tethered to the predicament that "Because he’s been courting me for so long, I should be with him". Yes, this is not applicable to all, but whether you agree with me or not, there are people who've been trapped in this kind of situation.
I’m also bothered by the no-label relationships that exist in today's generation. It seems to me that this is the contemporary type of dating. Everything else happens on phones and gadgets. And when we take it outside the influence of gadgets, everything else seems dull and non-existing.
Anyway, these are just common instances that take place in today’s time. But if you’re going to ask me what my view will be on this, well, in situations like this, I think what they’re missing is clarity.
They invest most of their treasures—time, money, and effort—in something that they’ve not been clear about the result. And yes, this sounds like gambling, but sometimes gambling too requires calculated risks.
Addiction is another part of the story.
So this is all for today I’ll update again tomorrow or the next day. As always, stay safe. You are loved.
Updates on my hiatus will follow soon.
A Taste of Disobedience and the Importance of Obedience
July 26, 2022
Hello guys, I was really disappointed today. Never have I been this disappointed with someone.
Earlier, I had an encounter with the kids, who were disobedient despite your being concerned with them. I am really sad to see these kids following their ways and justifying it because they reasoned out that they've already asked for someone's spermission even if I was the one in charge.
The authority to say "Yes" to an errand has been given to me. And they dare to defy it by tricking some people and using their names to justify their misbehaviour.
That night, my boyfriend and I also talked about how spoiled some kids were in this generation and the fact that you can't actually discipline them because their parents would justify their actions is way more gross.
They like to insist that they have the right to correct their child, but can easily be manipulated by a single tantrum, which is something I cannot take.
I have strict parents, and we in the family have never been the shy ones. We're more like people of strong character. Like those women who are not dependent and can easily say what they need to say. But, if our mother says no, we are easy to back down from or just leave it to be. "No" is not negotiable. If it's a NO, we don't insist on making it a YES.
A NO is a NO. It doesn't cost any tantrums to change it. It's a firm decision already.
Until now, those kids never managed to come to me and say an apology for the wrongs they did. I am not also expecting them to do it, especially when their parents are just around the corner. I hate dealing with those kinds of people.
I do require my parents. I need my mom for something I can't do, but to take accountability for my actions is for me. It wasn't my Mom's job to carry all the trouble I had. Taking care of us is already tiring for them.
Plus, if we never get to be responsible and accountable for our actions, We will never grow. We will never change into the better version of ourselves. People will always see us as the perfect ones who never go wrong in everything we do. Because there will always be someone who should be blamed for their shortcomings. Your bad actions don't necessarily reflect your bad decision-making, but your response to a bad result sure summarizes your character.
In the same way, those who are obedient are always rewarded. It might not be now, but in time they will reap what they sow. If they sow an obedient heart for every request, it is safe to say that their efforts and sacrifices will be rewarded in due time.
The Lord rewards those who honor their elderly and, above all, those who honor His commands.
So, if you want to receive all of His rewards, make sure to obey everything He says.
What's in My Head
**July 22, 2022**
I sometimes forget to update here. Yes, and it would bring me to one of those moments where people practically push the anecdote.
No one is too busy; it's just a matter of priority.
And yes, that is true, but I also value consistency. Thus, from then on, I would remind myself to put dates on all my future articles.
Here's for July 22...
I am a thinker; some would say an overthinker. Well, I don't know how to classify that. These days, the term "overthinker" refers to people who stay up late thinking about their lives, their loves, and their problems.
I, on the other hand, think about things most of the time, including daydreaming. I'm inquisitive wherever I go. So, when I see a plant, I immediately think of senescence, auxins, and growth and I draw patterns in it. I can't live without patterns. I tend to organize things in my mind and keep them messy as long as I think that some elements of the pattern aren't there yet.
I hate it when people touch my things or talk to me when I'm in the middle of figuring out something in my mind. I don't want to get disturbed. If you see me writing something with a lot of books open on my table, just mind your own business.
I am also detail-oriented and tend to check sources, often multiple sources, when I am not convinced of a particular idea (this is known as cross-referencing). For example, if we're just talking about espresso, you would be surprised that moments later we would already be discussing machiato, americano, red eye, the content of espresso in it and the like.
I don't know if this is right, but I'm actually seeing that I'm building the habit of a perfectionist person. I don't know what you call me, whether there's good in it or not.
I overcomplicate things, theories, and everything, sometimes my problem, but most frequently the data in front of me. I am not a detective or anything like that, but I can't settle with simple things, simple conclusions, simple ideas.
I want drama in everything. Not really the crying era, but that breakthrough we all call. And I don't know what you call this, but I am comfortable with a lot of information.
Some say "No stop that it's TMI already" (too much information). I don't mind that, as long as I am interested, but somehow along the way I need to stop again because I need to check whether what you said is really valid or not.
And lastly, I feel so overwhelmed that there's a nagging feeling that I don't want to work, but I woke up still working anyway. And I ask myself when will I ever give up, but I realize I would not give up. I seem boring, but I don't know why.
Is that an admirable skill that "one who never gave up?" I don't think so. Everybody can rest, and I won't. And all I hoped was that I'd find good in doing this or that, at the very least, my efforts would be paid.
I get discouraged though and sad from time to time, but I don't know, I can't give up and I don't like the idea of giving up either. Let me know your thoughts. Or your questions I might want to address that in the next article.
My mind's messy right? What do you think?
In time, I will improve
Heyy, it's been a while since I wrote something here.
I'm just busy these days as I'm learning how to ride a bike. I know. Some people here would be like, "You're already grown up; why can't you ride a bike yet?"
That is because I grew up with a culture that dictates that when you ride a bike you'll eventually damage your hymen, and these people are not happy with that tissue breaking, so every time we ride a bike back then we'll end up with a few marks on the body because of disciplinary action.
My clan is quite traditional, especially my late grandparents, who were of Spanish descent.
So yeah, we were learning, me and my older sister, since we bought a bike just recently. She actually learned first since she's got no work to accomplish these past few days while I have so much, so I just started yesterday.
It was quite funny. Yes, we've gotten a few teasing remarks from our neighbors. I didn't acknowledge that though. I can only think that I'm doing this because this is far from the things I've already mastered.
We might be a laughing stock now, but in time we will improve and we will learn. What's great about it is that this thing is somewhat new, so when we're able to learn it, it will be an addition to the things we have already learned. It's great and refreshing.
Well, not really refreshing. I have a few stresses in my muscles, but at least I've started. My sister got it bad because of the slippery road. She says that algae has already appeared in the area where she slipped.
It's been rainy these days, like every morning it pours, so we can't practice. We can only do so in the afternoon. She learned fast, and I'm so happy that our Mom is supporting us with this. She even encourages us to continue, although she forbids us to practice at night, especially when we just got out of dinner.
Our friends are very welcoming and supportive too. It's great, but I really need to learn this fast. Practice makes progress. I really do believe in that principle, so I'm sure that I'll be able to learn it in the coming days. Till then, pray for me..and remember to continue to strive to improve yourself too. We can always be better than our old selves. Remember that.
When it seems that it's too dark already
Hi guys, this is Thain. This day was actually a mix of something bitter and sweet. like the taste of citrus, or lime.
It didn't go well with me in the initial hours because, first off, I had a fever last night since I was caught by the rain yesterday. These days, rain pours so hard. I'm afraid it will pour at the same hour as the high tide occurs since the water level is increasing by 2 meters or more.
We live in an area where the geography is surrounded by bodies of water. Rivers, lakes, and seas; although there are a lot of mangroves to protect us, sometimes it is not enough to contain the surge of water.
Anyway, I am very irritable during the morning, and my mood is spoiled more when I learn that some of my father's family are technically destroying him in the eyes of his only family, his sister, with the intent of getting some money from our aunt. And it felt frustrating as they're supposed to be the ones who should support him, but instead they're the very first person to put him in a not-so-good situation. I recall them spreading lies about my father, who was technically their go-to person whenever they were in trouble. Toxicity at its finest.
It is so easy to get back at them and insult them with the words and actions they used to belittle us, as if we're begging them for food. We don't. In fact, those families even insult us to the very least by giving us money and showing the community how poorly we have become. This is not to deny that we really are poor, but we have our integrity and dignity in tact. I can tell when someone is worried or making fun of someone.
I did not accept the money, but my Mom did, also to avoid getting into fights with the in-laws. That is not the case for me. I'm enjoying company with small circles of genuine friends. This is also the standard for the clan I desired.
I hate chaos. Chaos that affects peace and security on the inside of our homes. I'd rather live alone than be with the family that vomits on us. The problem is, it has been a norm in the Filipino culture to let things stay the way they are, like "hayaan mo na yan" without realizing that the longer they face the actual problem, the worse it gets and uncontainable.
For now, I cannot still say something as I'm still living under my parents' roof, but the day will come when only us 7 or 8 of the clan will live together. I do not have a space in my home for those who turn their back on my father.
I am rational and cold, but he is still my father, and we are the only members of his family who have witnessed him struggle and fight. They don't have the right to destroy someone's reputation. The freedom of expression cannot hold a bearing when it is not to express but to commit slander.
On the other hand, I am quite thankful. At least I know who's to cut in my future journey... truly fake people leave when you've got no money to spend on them, and I'm thankful for those who stay during the bad times. You guys are the best! I know some people could relate to this. I, after all, wasn't the first person to be treated as garbage by her own family.
PS: Should've published this last night, but I've fell asleep.
I do Acad Commissions too: A Segway
I gave a write-up earlier to one of the high school students who needed help. She posted that she needs extra help with one of her homework assignments, a reaction paper by the way, but can't afford to pay someone in order to do it. I'm not really being generous, but I offered her some help.
She said it was due at 11:59 p.m., so we finished it by 5 p.m. Normally I do things which some refer to as "commission." And although it kind of twists skme ethics in there, perhaps enabling academic dishonesty in some terms, we cannot deny that those things exist. And many students, including those who were getting their Masters Degree, even choose to do this for reasons that they cannot do it on their own. Or they are too busy to even include studying those things, as there are those who only study for the diploma, so the chances of getting a high score is not the goal, but the passing mark-something that would lead them to graduate.
One thing that even gets me here is that when you analyze it in a business context, it is legal. You need service, I offer it, you take it, then you pay me. Smooth transaction. It's a win-win for both parties, just like ecology would have it as a mutalism relationship.
I still do that now as I have a lot of time because I'm on a break, so if you need some help in your academic, I might be able to help you. You just need to email me using the address **therealangelshark@gmail.com** or you can comment below so we can talk. I've already done paperwork for elementary, high school, senior high school, college, and master's degree takers (but selective, especially in feadibility and case studies). Most of the time, I do small things like rough drafts, outlines, scripts, and tutorials. And recently, modules.
Anyway, enough of the promotion. I'm actually happy that this year some of the students whom I've been able to tutor in elementary have graduated with honors and have been proficient in reading and calculations. I actually target first the phonetics so they won't sound cranky in English with a poor accent; then in mathematics, I teach them how to calculate mentally. And I've received credit from their parents, which warms my heart really, as I did not expect it. I've always told the kids to have their learning in session followed up when they come home, so it will be easy for them to master. So technically, their parents made an effort too.
Ma'am, whom I've helped in her final exams and concept paper for her Master's Degree, is now moving on to the next stage after passing it. And the recent college group whose study I've reviewed is already anticipating their next defense after passing their initial with minimal errors. Thus, because of this, I'm always assumed to be paid high, but actually I don't have my rate. I accept what they can offer. I understand it's hard for them and I can do it. It's a bonus, so the least I can do is help and accept payments if they have some.
Still, I'm hoping for more clients to come. Competition is tight these days with fewer clients as scammers also exist. I feel sorry for those who were victims of their modos.
Thank you for reading this. This is actually a rough draft, but I published it anyway. My email's on my profile, feel free to message it.
It is never easy, not flawless; just your average
And it is not the easiest thing to do. It never was...
Everybody struggles with consistency. But that's the goal, to have consistency. to make it happen. Choosing to turn it into something is not easy, but you still chose to do it.
That's where discipline and real passion take place. During the moments where you lack the motivation to do it, do it anyway. Everybody thinks that passion exists when you do things that you are really fired up to do, but they forgot to complete the sentence. They forgot that being passionate does not only mean doing things at a time where you feel like doing them. It's beyond that; it's a commitment, and commitment goes beyond actions.
You never get to pick your struggle, but it comes around depending on the situation you choose to engage in. We all think that everything will be flawless every time we plan it. We forget that perfection isn't real either. There can only be better, but perfection?
Nah, it doesn't exist. Hence, as much as we want to be optimistic, that's just what we can do. I hoped for things that would turn out better, but not flawlessly. There will always be faults.
And I'm just realizing that now...I don't know what "yours" is, but I consider this a big win. For someone who always thinks that things should happen perfectly, the ounces of sweat and tears to be considered are not included in the equation. It's a world where failures cease to exist. No heroes, because the hero alone can never go wrong. There will always be compromise.
That's why I can never agree with the starter pack of a common Filipino teleserye. It's full of drama and issues. I learned long ago that it was a full portrayal of things that had been influenced by the Americans during the American occupation in the Philippines—things like mobs, affairs, high maintenance, graft and corruption.
I never believed in the version of Cinderella being always a Damsel in Distress and the Prince, who, without actually making an extraordinary effort, becomes her saviour.
What kind of savior? From the hard life? The Prince just got to dance with him in just one night, with her leaving her glass slippers, even if the author says that they perfectly fit her. And is it even possible that you explore the whole town and can only wear those shoes?
Like, how is that supposed to happen? You've got a place with a bunch of girls almost at the same age, and one girl can only wear the shoes. Are your feet that big? Poor genetics As a result, the lesson here is that sometimes you just have bad genes.
hough this is too weak to establish a connection with the other clause, the point is that the idea of being helpless can never be written on our minds that eutopia has been made to battle the predicament which will lead to melancholies. And as bad as it may seem, we always end up going back over and over the plot because a conflict should exist.
A battle should happen. And no matter what kind of battle it is, whether one cheers for it or not, it will never be non-existent. So if you're still expecting things to happen flawlessly, think again.
You have too much on your plate.
When we were kids, we frequently noticed that every time we ate, our parents would always tell us to just take something we could afford to finish eating. Thus, when we take too much and seem hesistant to finish it all, the response was always, "That's because you have too much on your plate."
And lately, I realize that yes, I do indeed have too much on my plate. I forgot to take the things I can only afford to handle.
I engage too much in planning for tasks that are also unrealistic and unachievable in one day. I forced drastic changes to occur when momentum is what I needed.
I sought motivation when what I really needed was clarity about what I wanted to achieve and why I was doing it.
I always work and most probably have no time to play, but I did see that I don't need to engage in the hustle culture and even if I want to, I just need to figure out what I am hustling for. Does this reason require this level of effort to maintain it? Or do I only need to take a few small steps to effect change?
Yes, as much as we're impulsive in shopping, we too are impulsive in doing the same thing over and over for the sake of saving time.
We forgot to take a step back to analyze whether the track you're going through is still the same or have you gotten lost in the road already?
Which I really find helpful when I only have the time and effort to do it.
I remember years ago we were tasked with doing a project proposal regarding an establishment we could do for the school. I was tasked as the leader, and we actually got the highest rating back then. However, what caught my attention there is the monitoring process.
Thus, it made me realize that for every significant action, the first step was to always brainstorm and plan, but in the long run, there will always be monitoring. a process that will check whether you're still on the same path.
So this post is intended to check in with you.
How are you today?
Are you okay?
Are you still living? Or are you just surviving now?
Whatever you feel right now, that's fine. You can always reset and get back on track. As my elder said last week,
If you feel you have gone astray already and everything you have is beyond your control, Just pray and eventually you will get back to the path you're supposed to be taking.
Momentum is also important. The world does not require you to take everything at once. Momentum is when you do things little by little until you feel you can take bigger chunks.
Take your time for things that don't have a deadline, but also remember to start as soon as possible. Time cannot be taken back.
You only have a lifetime in this world. Make it count.
We're still sailing, It's fine
I was really happy earlier as I had been able to finish one individual project and had understood one topic that I was really confused about.
I was also reviewing for the upcoming exams next week. And I just find the coverage bearable now, maybe because my mind isn't that occupied compared to those past days while we were in the middle of it.
While doing the tasks provided during this semester, I also realized that, indeed, the likeliness of learning and finishing a certain task is dependent on the mood and focus of a person.
Such that yes, discipline should be established, but if you keep doing the same thing every day without the intent of just finishing it rather than prolonging it, You will waste more time than usual.
I also believe in the "moving at your own pace" principle. When you try to level your truth with some people who actually started earlier or were able to cope quickly, you might end up not learning or improving at all.
You will feel that there's something missing or things you haven't paid that much attention to yet and you have just moved on from it. There's no proper growth.
Some would say that to be able to learn you must be uncomfortable, but that being uncomfortable would take you nowhere if it's just uncomfy for no reason at all.
Well, there are always two kinds of events that usually happen in our lives. The ones that make us feel successful and the ones that make us feel like a failure.
And back then, I would always focus on the failure or the silver lining of such an event. Disregarding the good or the "at-least" that has happened.
I used to see failure and incapability. And yes, compared to others' growth, what I fail to see is my path. My own path or the direction I am taking I despise the bad things that have happened to me in the past and only accept the good. The old me refuses to see growth and improvement.
But seeing things now, I realized that yes, some events need to happen, some people need to leave, and some opportunities need to be wasted in order for one to see a difference.
And as much as this is true in some ways, the truth is that we're the ones carving our path, which means it's also co-existing with it.
Fate can do nothing; it is us that drive our own cars on the main road and, of course, that divine intervention brought by the Lord.
We take hold of our own destiny. We make choices and we somehow make things happen. I used to complain that some things were happening to others but nothing to me.
However, I'm much more aware now that everything is traded. In order for one to gain something, they should have something to exchange it for.
The more valuable the thing is, the higher the price. And these prices range between time, energy, morals, and the like. Conversely, if you do not want something to happen, then you are not expected to be committed to such a thing.And if you can't do the thing everybody else does, then maybe you do not want it as much as they want it. And there's nothing wrong with that.
Like I've mentioned earlier, take everything at your own pace. You better try not to conform to everybody else's standards, or else you'll end up wasting your skills. Or your potential and growth undeveloped.
My type of good harvest
So earlier, I woke up late. Yeah, for someone who's used to waking up at 5-6 AM, waking up at 8 or 9 AM is already noon. I walk past my garden and have observed that some of my plants' leaves are turning yellow.
So in biology, that's what you call senescence. It is usually an indication that leaves will fall out anytime soon, and, when not taken care of, the plants might die. Well, some plants really die even if you take care of them, as they have a short lifespan.I saw that a lot of banana leaves were shading my plants.
Then, in another part of my garden, I have plants with patterned leaves, which indicate a calcium deficiency. And that others are dying due to drought and unstable weather.
Then this afternoon, my friend asked me if our area is full of trees or if the area in our house is wide and readily available enough for a tree to be planted. Then I said to her, "Actually, yaa, if you're going to plant, you still need to consider whether your area is shaded or not, because the amount of sunlight the plant is getting is important as well as the fertility of the soil."
She was shocked. I asked her again what kind of plant she was planning to do. Would she want to plant rootcrops, vegetables, flowers, etc.?
She told me she's planning to plant a tree and is also planning to buy seedlings. The one that is packed.And I told her again that it's very rare to find a seedling for a tree unless it's a mangrove.
Usually, when one plans to plant a tree, they collect seedlings from the tree that has already borne fruit. Then they germinate it in a pot before transferring it to the soil.
By the end of our conversation, I was able to give her some choices and reasons why that happens. She also asked me what kinds of plants I was planting, and I realized right there and then I was able to plant several vegetables, though I was planning to upgrade my garden and replant some of the veggies because the recent storm had greatly devastated some of them.
But my heart really did melt. Truly, God has ways of revealing that what you do, as long as it's honorable and doesn't hurt anyone, is valued. Planting is great, planting could help, and earlier while I was doing that, I was on the verge of thinking that what I'm doing is insignificant and doesn't really count. I had no idea that my limited experience with plants would be useful to my friends.
Author's Note: This is reuploaded as I was quick to take it down the last time I published it here, not even getting views from others.
Anyway, presently I have lost time for gardening, except for germinating seedlings. It might be because my plants are full grown now and I do not need to check them daily. Of course, given that it's the rainy season already, I won't have to worry about watering.
Plus, there is no available land that can be cultivated in our backyard. Those who don't have plants in their area can not also be catered to as they are shaded by our other trees. Our home is full of fruit-bearing trees: Avocado, Mango, Jackfruit, Calamansi, Coconut, Banana, Duhat, and Chico. Because I also planted some vegetables, they are also available in our home, as are root crops such as ginger and sweet potatoes.
I grew up in a farming family, so I had some experience with planting, which was only enhanced when I studied Biology.
What does it mean to be a Filipino?
These conversations have taken my beliefs to the next level when the campaign season and the election come. Society was flooded with historical distortions and revisionism.
I felt bad for Renato's Constantino's Writings, which has the word "revisited" in its title. I felt suffocated by the side-by-side arguments on who’s the most fitting candidate for the position of presidency.
Rallies started, the social media began to be an instrument for fake news, brothers turning from one another because of their political views, one man belittling the other and wishing for its demise.
It is classic. And I have not been the only one to see it. Yes, the campaign season with "bardagulans" and everything is starting to create a division among people. And the red ones, let us just be honest this time, started to blame the pink ones for initiating some change.
The argument have became more complex when they have brought the existence of NPA and activists on the line, claiming that students from prestigious universities, including a large number of activists, have been brainwashed by an institution when, in reality, the institution is just one part of the student's life, and they have their own brains to do the thinking for them.
Yes, there’s a division, and there has been a long-running comparison of the number of voters placing emphasis on the dominance of red camp in polls. There are so many of them, and while others think that it is already a sure win for their candidate, others just make sure it does not change till the date of the election by silencing the sounds of justice.
They have been ready to mock every activist or person against the historical revisionism that is happening, but they can not understand the struggle of these people to just prevent the dictator's son from going back to the Malacañang palace because they have been able to see that behind those glamorous infrastructures built during the father’s regime, a massive number of people have had to sacrifice their blood.
In order to make it appear as if it were the golden age, a lot of farmers had to be grabbed by their lands, ending up in a street with no haciendas to go back to. In order to speak freely with conviction, you have to be ready to see yourself dwelling in prison cells.
Everything has a cost during martial law. Maybe then it is called a "golden age," because in trade for its name, people pay for things as expensive and rare as gold. And now, that election has been held, with the results favouring the other party.
We are forced to return to our lives, homes, and current states, knowing that changes are about to be carved in the new face of history. And whether we like what is happening now or not, we just can not do anything about it, because we have been in a democratic country and it has always been wrong to take the voices of the people, especially if what they voiced cost them a lot— their dignity, integrity, health, wealth, morals, or even their family member’s life.
The challenge has always been centered on how to become a better Filipino, and in the present state of the country, the challenge remains the same. I am a Filipino with all these flaws, shortcomings, little victories, and a mindset. With this blood and adherence to the country's rules, To become a Filipino for me means being in service to the Filipino people in any way that I can.
No matter how small or big the act is, as long as I have been transparent and honest with what I do, that is enough for me already. My voice is just one of those wailing for justice for the oppressed and the unprivileged, and in this society where the face of activism has been tagged as the enemy of the state, the freedom of speech is nearing the possibility of being erradicated again.
The struggle has become more intense and the desire for victory over injustices is starting to become like fruit being fermented and kept in a barrel only to taste sweeter after some time. And what I can do as of now is to make the environment where I’m at exhibit a lower sum of inequality and fake news by using my voice to speak up with love and compassion.
These people who go astray are like sheep lost in the meadow because it’s either their shepered have not been with them and are not able to look out for them, or they have been carried with some herds of sheep, partly owned by other shepered.
They are lost simply because a lot is happening in their environment, and for them to go back, they need someone they know to say it to them or to guide them. Thus, this also implies that if I want some change, I should start with the ones who know me and have trust in me to guide them.
These tactics work in all sorts of situations. What is crucial in this approach, however, is your reason for doing that. If it’s for the better, then that’s good. Go for it. If it's for destruction, please have time to reflect on it. So it is a good thing that people will see how truthful your legacy is today.
Change will come to this country, and some will see it from different points of view, but kindness and generosity cannot be limited by these boundaries; they are limitless and should be practiced daily. Hence, in this kind of set up, the strength of the people lies in their numbers.
As a result, if more people doing kindness, more people coming into light and clean slate, those who abuse the motherland will be outnumbered, and we will once again live with the proper kind of love for the pearl of the Orient Seas.
The will to serve: An introduction
I’m not an early bird. Long ago I was, but that was during a time period where deadlines were far more important than the essence or the purpose of a given activity.
Although content-wise and accurate, I’d like to believe that a project, whether big or small, achieves its full significance when the words are not dead. Or rather, it was breathed from the author’s soul.
I, not being an early bird, would probably have this exam passed 2 or 3 days before the end of the semester, but this isn’t the time for that. The question was too personal and relevant at this time, so here’s my answer:
I’ve been writing for more or less a decade now and have always found solace in words. Whether corny or interesting, crafts are beautiful. tainted and flawed, but the possibility of growth is never gone. The aesthetics are still there. As a result, I was constantly reminded that when writing in a non-academic context, you always carry with you your aim, whether to inform, entertain, or persuade.
Thus, this book was written with the understanding that this craft cannot be contained within the walls of books and theoretical knowledge. This is personal and I intend to inform you of it. I'm not sure how to answer the question, "What does it mean to be a Filipino?"
I hated these genes. Growing up, I was always insecure about my body size. My age only adds up, but I didn’t seem to reach puberty. I was always small, and even if I was capable, my skills have always been tied down to what I looked like. I was prevented from doing practical tasks as I might just hurt myself.
The ability to reach certain regions after winning several contests that concern the school at a given level has only added to the evidence of my incapability to be useful outside of the school. For some, I am only good in acads; outside, I would perish.
I had no idea those were already subtle forms of smart-shaming and body-shaming. And though it unarms someone with confidence, it is treated as a norm in this society. Thus, considering it is already the norm, it is not hard to conclude that these people have been living longer than I have ever imagined and I was one of their victims.
I recently had a conversation with my students. Well, I’m not a professional teacher. I may not be even qualified to be one, but I chose to spend some time in the morning teaching neighboring kids the basics of theoretical knowledge in school.
One of our conversations has remained with me, not because it is funny, but because it was real and full of character. One of the kids, whom I fondly call Carah, has spoken about working in a station department with the cops rather than working in the field, not because she does not want to and because it is dangerous, but rather because of the belief that she cannot go out there and chase some law violators because she is a woman and she is not fit to be doing that when men are around her.
And though it might make some sense as some fields in the Philippines are dominated by men, what I did not like about the narrative was the fact that it is mainly a mysoginyst statement hiding behind a widely accepted adage of society.
In my mind, the possibility of women excelling or just basically being given the opportunity to handle a certain thing should depend on the possibility of men being absent in that field.
Women are not inferior, and that is not to raise competition for men. That is just to acknowledge the truth that there is no competition in the first place and that there should be no favours and prejudices to be raised because that is a right to be guaranteed to all people, not sex-related or gender-related.
Author's Note: This is still incomplete might post the lacking part tomorrow.
To make me scared a little
I’m into Dua Lipa songs lately; Break My Heart, Physical, and also Bebe Rhexa’s I’m a mess. Well, contrary to your intuition that it might be about the message, no—it was about the beat.
The beat and the vibe keep me from just sitting around the corner. The beat is so lively that you just want to go around the house grooving.
I don’t know, I don’t have anything special to do with my time, so what I did was that I watched the movie—one of the two movies that got me traumatized when I was little.
It was a Filipino horror film. It was really nerve-racking and the sounds were indeed traumatizing, as well as the cinematography, but I did it. I focused on the plot, and now I’m not afraid anymore.
I was also moved by Yan’s gesture—my boyfriend. We clearly discussed this one before, and then I told him I'd watch it the next day; he asked if I could do it, and I was confident I could, but then, just minutes before I told him I couldn't, he said he'd watch it with me.
We went for a video call but when we watched it there were no sounds, so we tried another method. Still it isn’t working. So he created a link in the Google meet and we watched the movie.
There were already sounds, which made me regret that I told him about the movie because he said he got kind of scared of the sounds because indeed the film was traumatizing in the first part. Well, kudos to the director.
But again, we weren’t able to get through the next scenes because Globe is annoying, like the signal is a bummer, and the next thing I knew I was watching the movie alone.
Well, I wasn’t completely alone. I had Uno, my cat stuffed toy, with me. I hid behind him from time to time. And I ended the day without being afraid anymore. The feeling was so nice, it was a victory indeed.
Author's Note: Thus, I learned from here years ago that it is really a must to stay with your kids or to not let your kids watch rated SPG movies at all.
It might look exciting to you, but there are scenes that instead of being just pictured as nasty, are already traumatizing for them. Especially if it involves blood and killing. Protect your kids!
To wait and to stay patient
I’m starting to feel better every day. I don’t know what happened.
I’m starting to feel better every day. I don’t know what happened. I’m spending most of my days watching psychology videos, motivational clips, and, of course, anything that could help me be as productive as possible.
I don’t know if this was just a phase, but I’m really feeling better. All I wanted was to change for the better, be productive, be ready for learning, even if that means risking some things. I’m ready to accept criticism and start from scratch.
I’m being hopeful too, and I’m missing my boyfriend as the time goes by. I don’t know, this might sound cheesy but who cares, you’re the only one who could read this anyway.
I really love him, not because he’s got good looks, well he’s not physically attractive, but what makes him lovable and appealing to me is that he understands me, he accepted me even if I was at my lowest, he cares for me genuinely and takes time to get to know me and discover what’s wrong with me or what my potential.
Some might say maybe because I just love him because he’s the only one who can understand me or maybe because he loves me. That’s not it. Well, maybe that is a little bit true, but what about it?
There are times when we really love those who can understand us because we feel we are important. It might sound selfish, but that is true. Sometimes we love the person because they love us, and eventually we find ourselves in love with them because we manage to see things beyond our control, and what’s amazing is that we have come to accept that and love that without us knowing.
Author's Note: Presently, we are still going strong, and we're attending college now. But we're farther from each other now since he had to stay at the City for school purposes since he'll be graduating from college next academic year.
And I'll also be leaving to stay inside the university for this academic year, which was a return campus actually and is away from the city. But we still communicate and manage to do our devotional and sharing. We've also agreed to have some core values to practice to lessen misunderstandings all throughout, as we're both drained from the academic load to begin with. Both of us should be each other's rest and peace for a little while.
I'm still having problems and difficulty managing my emotions, but I'm finding ways to deal with that. Soon, with God's grace, I know I'll be free from this.
Narrative of the Second Day
I felt so alone.
I’m not sad, I just felt alone and I can’t call my friends because they are busy and I chose not to call them even if they’re not. I just realized that this will be my norm in the next few years.
I’m close to adulting. Adults need to think of what is more important, and that is earning and working, and be more focused on their goals since the picture of responsibility has never been clearer.
I’m still working on other projects, and those were big enough to consume almost all of my energy, but in the back of my mind I know I can do it—no sweat because I already understand what nature is all about. It’s easy to work if you know what you’re working on and what you're supposed to do to achieve the maximum.
Of course, I work not because I just feel it, I’m working because I wanted to leave the city for a while. From June 24 to June 27, we are going to have a vacation to attend a wedding in one of the rural areas of Sagay City, and that is the break I’m wishing for.
Thus, to secure my attendance, I’ve worked to earn money for fare and for emergencies. I don’t know, but I fancied shopping for clothes.
I love dressing up in rugged or Korean style street wear because it suits my body type, which is ironic when compared to how I look, because as much as I love colors, I’m also very uniform and particular with what I pick. So far, my earnings have been minimal, but I'm confident that will change soon.
**Author's Note:** I still feel alone from time to time now and, just like what I said here, I'm working on facing my problems at hand in a more personal way. I still see my friends, though we rarely see each other as we’re all busy at our own universities.
None of us are both staying at just the same university, so we understand the struggle of meeting new people along the way and, of course, the timing of our schedule. Given that we attend some of the top universities in the country, the grind cannot be underestimated as well.
This year I won’t be taking any vacation in those rural areas since there are a lot of things to deal with at home and a lot of errands to run most days. I’m stuck in this suburban vicinity.
I really prefer staying in rural areas as I love seeing green landscapes and inhaling fresh air. I love the scent of grass after it rains and the sound of cattle and chirping birds on the farm—no staying up late at night and no dealing with toxic people.
Day 1 of Story Telling
I’m not really fond of using the word "diary" here; it appears corny and cringe to me, but because I want to make this sentimental, let’s indulge in it.
Well, diary, I’ve always been thankful to God for everything he has done in my life. There are times I feel hopeless, alone and lonely, but that is only temporary. Sooner or later, I’m back to my usual self again. And yes, I know this doesn’t happen to me alone but to most people also. The feeling that we’re stuck in a moment where we tend to be overwhelmed with everything that is happening in front of us, we forget to think a little bit and say, "Hey, this is a temporary conflict. This won’t kill us, nor will this concern us for the next year, so stay calm and let’s figure out how to work this out."
And it’s really common. It happens frequently to me and I struggle to manage my response most of the time, but still, all storms pass away—they're temporary like seasons. It might stay for a while, but soon it will leave.
Now, God, he has given me another opportunity. He’s given me a job, and work, though that signifies tiredness and being exhausted because I had to deal with so many things, has got me feeling motivated and overwhelmed. And I hope God will continue to sustain me in this setting just like how he sustained me when I was sick last Tuesday.
Well, normally I don’t get sick, unless I spend too much time outside. I’m immune to the idea that I’ll experience mild fever because of the heat, but thank God I’m already healed and well functioning now. But the aftermath of the sickness is that we tend to spend a sum of money, and though I don’t have any money left, I was comforted by the fact that at least my money was spent well.
So going back, earlier I was able to meet with my client and she was very nice. I’ve received a downpayment for my job and we spent hours in the coffee shop talking about life. She was very nice, though I, being observant, noticed that she’s not the humble type, but she’s nice. She knows how to show concern as well as to make a conversation. We’ve had some negotiating about additional work and I quite enjoyed it, maybe because we were on the same wavelength for a time.
Though I went home later than 6 p.m., I had a great time. I hope things will get even better the next time. Till then, you have to wait for me to tell you stories again.
Author's Note: I wrote this one when I was still in high school, and I’m just so amused by how I wrote my past reflections before. Originally this contained a lot of grammatical errors and typos which I’ve already corrected. I hope you enjoyed this one. I’ll see you in the next entry. This was a total of 7 entries, which I'll post in either consecutive days or at specific intervals of hours.
Research on My High School Perspective
Hello guys, so I was doing a clean up with all my devices and I found out that I have a lot of saved documents in my drive, with works from when I was still in high school up to the most recent ones that I've done this semester.
And I actually found this one. It's a scientific reflection regarding research, and so I'm sharing it with you now. This was written, I guess, 2 to 3 years ago.
In this module we have discussed the different kinds of variables involved in research—what about them? and their purpose for existing in the given experiments. The whole coverage was simple yet very specific when it fired its bullets.
The lesson taught me that life is like an experiment, and we aren’t always sure of what’s going to happen next. We aren’t sure of the things, the possibilities, and the choices, so we always explore once, twice, or many times to verify whether a certain situation is possible; and in every trial we do, there are always unnecessary situations that appear.
It also taught me that we, as humans, have control over our decisions. We have a say in anything we do, provided that we stay committed to our words.
Once we start our own journey, there ain’t no turning back. The next thing that happens eventually happens on its own—you have no control over it! The results don’t depend on you anymore, instead they vary.
Though you have a stand in smaller situations, this doesn’t count much, and when not taken care of, this little control may go overboard and dominate in the long run.
These things may challenge your principles and integrity as a human. Sometimes this will keep you thinking, "Where on earth did you go wrong?" You resort to blaming yourself, overlooking the possibilities that may have created the fault in the circuit.
You didn’t understand that it isn’t entirely your fault, and in this case, the problem isn’t the problem anymore but your attitude in handling the problem. That’s life as a science experiment, and that’s my realization for this week’s lesson.
How can social media affect you?
Hello guys, this is just a random thought since I kinda miss drafting articles for this platform.
I was on break again from everything. Right after class, I packed my things and went to the fields again. The place was isolated from everyone else in the Hacienda because my family had the task of planting crops and vegetables for the boss. So they harvest every week's set of veggies and deliver them to the main house.
Below is the harvest for this week. It comprises of eggplants, Malabar Spinach, Water Spinach, Silk Squash, and Jute Leaves.
The plan was for me to take a break from Soc Med and focus on things that are physical and tangible, but one of my professors has told us that she encountered problems regarding our exams and she asked us to stand by for some time as she's still drafting the final grade for us. So I had to make sure I had access to the internet.
Breaking also means not really having a lot of work to do, which comes down to being unoccupied most of the time with no things to deal with. I can even barely touch dishes to wash or a broom to sweep.
Most of the time, I watch television and lie down. And of course, there's the temptation of using social media, which unfortunately has not been avoided by me.
Initially, social media seemed like a good thing. It's proof that humans are constantly evolving into species that are able to handle technology well. However, we cannot deny that within the last few years, social media has become a tool for human diaries, for rants and expression, cyber bullying as well as fake news.
It has become a significant part of our lives, especially the teenage ones, that a single teenager can lie and watch YouTube, or Instagram live, or Tiktoks all day.
It should not revolve around the content, we know that, but we cannot deny that sometimes we get drawn to something when the content is interesting to us.
Contents, aside from being created to attract viewers, ultimately affect viewers when what is being shown sparks interest (freelance jobs or propaganda) or things that make you wish you had it.
Whether we deny it or not, human as we are, we tend to be more attracted to things that fuel our insecurity than the ones we don't have. Of course, there are percentages of the population that get drawn because one is inspiring, but the inspiring words itself showcases that something is not in you yet. You have just to get it in the future, you're not doing it yet.
And it's good when the content only inspires you to do better, to keep improving, or to have something good to look forward to. But if it doesn't and only fuels your insecurity and your cravings for things that you know you can't get, it's best that you evaluate yourself first.
Social media is not something that has a hammer and hits your head. But when you fail to guard yourself from everything that is trying to get you, it could be much worse than that.
Social media is social media. It's a place full of unique characters and when you are not able to keep your shit together when in between, you might find yourself doing things that you did not expect to do in the first place. If the intentions were bad or the root was bad, it could only lead to devolution.
Life Update; For you who supports
Hello guys, this is Thain and I just want to thank you all for posting your comments on my updates even though I lack the time to reply to them one by one.
Last week was very hectic and hard for me as it was my finals week, or what the majority of our school has tagged as "hell week."
And indeed, it was hellish, in the human definition of hell, and everything was just so uncontainable. Even up until now.
I was also in a state of confusion as the inflation rate in our country during the month of May has been recorded as the highest inflation yet.
And here as well, I don't know what content to write as I don't know what topic really appears good. The pay out isn't really favorable these days and I've been observing a lot of things that doesn't really look good.
I might also take down some of my articles here to have a little clean up, but till then, thank you so much for supporting me.
I will write again soon, but I'll surely reply to your comments today. Everyone, please stay safe. You are all loved.
You are allowed
You are allowed.
You are allowed to cry when things get tough and heavy.
It's okay to do it.
Nobody's born strong all the time. We will always be in a situation where we seem powerless and naive about everything, and that's normal. That happens to everybody. That's a sign of being human.
Being in pain and feeling every bit of dust is being human. If you cannot feel an ounce of pain, then it could be that you're not already in this world.
Even the stone-hearted ones can feel how deadly a scene was; they just refuse to acknowledge the feeling because it was never good in the first place.
When you're in pain, everything you see is ugly. Is hurtful. Especially when you are sentimental about something.
Nothing's good when you feel bad. Everything feels bad all of a sudden because your vision has been covered with dark clouds waiting to pour their load.
And just like dark clouds that rain, you are allowed to pour out your emotions too. If everything is too heavy for you to carry, you're allowed to let go of it. And you owe no one an explanation for your crying.
All people cry, they just don't do it most of the time because the world sees it as a sign of weakness.
Crying, especially for men, has never been normalized as a representation of grieving, of being brave enough to let go or being human.
For the most part, crying has been seen as a sign of weakness, as if being affected by all the negativities is a sign of weakness. It is not. It just means you're not numb enough to not feel what's been going on around you.
You are allowed
You are allowed to say No.
It's hard to say no, especially when the person you're talking to has done some good things for your sake, or they're good at using the appeal to emotion tactic in argument.
It's hard to say no when everybody is saying yes and you're the only one about to decline, but hey, it's okay if you don't want to do anything.
If you don't want to attend an activity you're not comfortable with. It's okay to say no to someone who wants you to join a hangout with a group of friends. It's okay to say "no" if it really means "no" to you.
You were not born to say yes all the time.
You are born with flaws, imperfections, weaknesses, and things that you don't find comfortable. And you don't need to push yourself to be okay with the things you are not okay with.
Consent is non-negotiable. If someone says "No," it only means "Stop." You're not allowed to go into that place anymore.
Negotiation is done over a cup of tea or breakfast when you're talking about business and expansion, but when it concerns your personal peace, learn to decline.
Between you and other people, it is you who knows yourself better. Why should they have a better understanding of your actions?
You know yourself. And you know when things are already hurting you or making you happy. The choice is always up to you, and you have to acknowledge that right.
That freewill in which only you have a say in how your life should be lived. It is for you to decide. Not other people. Even if the whole world encourages you to do such a thing, if you don't want it, it is still up to you to decide.
They can't argue with you if you've already established your position.
So guard yourself and protect it at all cost, because when everything else is placed in a not-good situation, rarely can you find a person who's going to save you first instead of themselves.
Afterall, they cannot save you if they can't even do it to themselves in the first place.
This is Thain, and always remember that you are loved. And your emotions are valid.
The "Re" that loses value over time.
The English grammatical rules have taught us that when we want a thing to occur several times, we should look for verbs with the "Re" prefix.
Of course, there are verbs which have re in their appearance but are not actually for the purpose of letting a certain action or thing occur again, like receive or better yet, their root word doesn't really showcase an action.
But most often, the purpose of "re" is what we described in the last sentence. Such that "repetition," "reuse," even rwcite and recycle are action words, which when re is removed, is still an action word or anything that describes a system.
For example, cite is to say something.
When you recite, you say something again or you add insights to a certain query, but it is already provided that before you can recite, lectures have already been completed. Or maybe the professors have already taught you some lessons.
You cannot usually recite when someone hasn't informed you of the content. Or you have no background knowledge of the whole thing. By this means, for a repetition to occur, an action of the same thing must precede.
However, as much as doing things again is sometimes significant, we cannot deny that the more we repeat it, the more alterations emerge, leading the aim of an action in the first place to be just nothing, and the act itself, through time, devalues or devolves. Like the successive acts, they have been a step farther away from the original one.
Like, for example, in recycling.
It is good to recycle. It is even considered a good act for the environment, but we can only recycle one thing at a time and when we go beyond that, the resource we have starts to deplete.
The product intended to be created from the recycled source isn't that well functioning anymore. Something is not enough to become an asset anymore and thus its values depreciate, eventually leading it to be a liability.
And in situations like this, we are much more likely to simply obtain a new object and leave the product alone.
The act of repetition, most of the time, devalues a thing.
Another example is in the case of apologies for failing someone. This one is really relevant. I have always observed this in youth and in what they call toxic relationships.
The number of times they were apologized for failing to keep a promise of change has caused them to give up on their love for each other.
Most of them even stress the real meaning of being sorry being turned into something worthless because of the cliche'ness of the act of apologizing and still sinning again.
It is so stressful that it hurts the eyes and the heads of anyone who realizes what's really going on in something.
Too much repetition is also annoying. You say something and then you need to say it again over and over.
For songs, we have this called LSS or Last Song Syndrome, wherein the song you last played and enjoyed keeps playing on your mind and won't go away. But, no matter how much you want to say you love a song, too much replaying of it will cause you to dismiss it as normal and just another song. Like the magic of the words and the harmony doesn't affect you anymore.
As a result, I realized how majestic and awesome those people who never gave up are. Those who continued to try despite all the odds and failure. Those are the people who continue to climb their mountain and never stop until they reach the peak.
It has been marvelous, as again, it's normal for humans to let go of that thing easily, especially when that thing becomes boring and useless in our eyes. When we are exposed too much to that thing, we can no longer find the joy in seeing it.
They're worthy of being recognized for their perseverance and dedication to pursue thethings that seem impossible to the world, and I hope that you become one of them too.
Research suggests that all people have potential.
When we were still kids, we had a lot of potential as well as a lot of ideas. However, what sets successful people aside is that they are those who acknowledge this potential and develop it in the long run so it becomes a productive skill.
I hope you become one of these people, so never give up if you're working on something you know would help you in the long run. Stay safe. You are loved.
It seems that love is a stranger in our lives.
People like to assume when they know a lot of people that they already know the world.
When they became familiar with things found in cities, they placed themselves under the idea that globalization is already in their hands. But the truth is, you will never get to see, or better yet, know, the entirety of this world. As much as you can never know the entirety of a person.
All of us are strangers here.
A famous poem once postulated that what if we're just actors and actresses of this world? Whereas in the role playing, you begin when you are born and end when you are already in your coffin.
This world is so diverse that to assume you know everything in it is questionable, but the gist is, isn't this a remarkable aesthetic?
When you know you're a stranger and everything else is unpredictable, your sense of direction cannot indicate whether or not your destination is the real one.
We tackle different paths and along the way, there's no assurance that the path we take can lead us to greater wealth, fulfilling happiness, and a well-examined life.
But the great thing is, we are all risk-takers.
Yes, we do plan and sometimes we calculate risks, but only for a short time. The moment we reach the peak and see to it that we have finished that phase, the question of "what now?" emerges again.
And again, we plan and embark on a new journey. We will continue to do so until we have reached the end of our time where our energy is well spent and our resources are near depletion.
Life being a collection of small journeys is also the same for all of us. What makes it different is how you plan and walk your journey.
Did you meet someone while you were on your walk and share a philosophy with him?
Did you find that time memorable?
When you are on your death bed, how do you find your life?
Research conducted on people in their death beds when asked what their greatest regret shows that almost a hundred percent regret that they didn't live the life they wanted.
That is, they lived their entire lives for the image society, their parents, and their peers desired of them. Not what they wanted.
They have accepted the image that society has crafted for them rather than living the image that they truly desire.
They missed the opportunity of being authentic because they tried to be like other people. And everybody has this kind of attitude.
I am not saying that everyone on their death bed will have this kind of regret, but rather that once in their life they cannot deny that they have tried to live the life other people want them to live.
Even villains and heroes do this. Every ordinary person has this, has insecurity and wishes to live the life others are living, especially when life is not as good as it should be.
And that makes me wonder.
Why are there some people who don't easily give up on other people but are quick to give up on themselves?
Of course, there are narcissists, but we all know that it's not healthy to be around those people. genuine self-love is hard to build and is hard to practice.
But I hope that we will get to fully recognize its importance so we can apply it to ourselves. A lot of people need love, and sometimes that love must come from themselves to themselves.
Learning from the Learners
Hello guys, this is your angel, Thain, and this is the second part of my narrative in relation to my teaching journey.
Actually, I was still seeing these kids and they occasionally asked when I would formally return to our session. I am planning to be back next week but maybe this time we'll be in a different location since our headquarters were already finished. The nipa house is already fully constructed now with walls and windows, unlike before, so it's closed every morning, but I'm still hoping that we will be able to continue.
Anyway, here's the narrative. And we are now in week 5.
Week 5
Week five is for KR. KR is short for Krispel Rosaine. KR is a very genuine kid. I don't know what’s with her, but she’s very genuine and kind. She’s honest with me about everything regarding her progress, and that’s a good start.
I would always hear of her being bullied by other kids outside of class when they’re playing because she’s too kind. KR does not love coloring her dawings, so most of her drawings only contain patterns and no colors. When it comes to reading, she reads English pieces such as "The Wise Little Girl," "The Little Mermaid," and "Beauty and the Beast," while Mariel reads Beauty and the Beast and Snow White.
KR is still slow at mental math. We track her progress and she’s either lacking 1 or 10 in her answer. Sometimes her answers are over 1 or 10. which is an indication that she doesn’t know where to start counting while subtracting and adding something.
We learned the detailed process of borrowing numbers and carrying them, the basics of fractions, and a little bit of mental math.
We would always form a circle and let one another hold a book and listen to the other while he or she read their part. Sometimes our time runs out because they tend to tell me about what happened in their present lives, how they are as kids, their progress in other things, hobbies, and the sports they play. Thus, there’s a conversation between us that took place a week after, and it was a very genuine one.
Week 6
This week was for genuine conversations—full of character, bravery, and dreams.
On that one particular day in the week, we sat down and I just read them. The story of Hansel and Gretel. After storytelling, I spent the last few minutes with them, and we started talking about our dream professions. They asked me what I would like to be in the future. Stef I immediately exclaimed,
"Oh she wanted to become a scientist," which, though not really a dream, I said yes to because what I envisioned for myself in the future was the same as that.
Mariel wanted to be a teacher, Rea wanted to be a doctor, and Carah wanted to be a cop.
Then I heard, "You're going to be a police woman, but you're so small."
Carah immediately responded, "Would you please not dictate to me what I want in life; I'm not dictating yours."
What a bold narrative, but it’s a good thing that they acknowledge that they are the only ones that could decide for themselves and not others. I also learned that KR wanted to become an engineer, only to change her mind a week after, so I told her that we would master math so it would be easier for her someday.
Adi wanted to become a teacher because she wanted to spend her money on treating kids with food. And it’s a good thing to know that they have dreams and they tried to elaborate and fight for them because, as people who were not really fortunate, dreams could be our weapon in persevering.
Week 7
The net week was for Adi. And I was really thankful I was able to listen well during my entire time in science classes because she bombarded me with the periodic table, asking whether helium and oxygen gases are the same. Why don't we have a winter? Do aliens exist? And so on and so forth?
Adi is very curious. She lives a well-off life compared to the other kids. KR is her cousin, and KR, too, has a good life, and when I say a good life is when both parents are professionals, so they’re consistent in attending schools. They could get what they wanted in life, not just what they needed. By this means, Adi already has a phone and so is very attentive to it. She rarely goes out of their house to play and would rather learn educational stuff.
Adi’s character is that of being a law abider. She always wants to follow the rules and tells her classmates that they should do the same, which is a good principle. Cheating is always cheating, no matter what face it takes. So she’s very honest when she doesn’t know what to do with her equation.
She’s also a vocal person and easily irritated, which is why Carah sometimes likes to tease her, but the kid definitely knows how to handle drama. I bet Twitter personas should go to her for advice on how to handle bashers.
By the end of our session, Adi came up to me and said, "I hope you’ll get what you wanted for Ate." And that just warmed my heart to have someone happy with me achieving my dream someday.
Week 8
Week 8 was a wrap; it was just casual. We actually stopped a little or we had a little break after the kids got busy with Flores de Mayo. We drew after having our post test, with Mariel and Stef already getting the perfect score in math.
Carah and KR can now read both in Filipino and English. They have already fixed their errors in math. They already know where to count when numbers are subtracted or added, and they've mastered the technique of mental math multiplication, which means they've lost a lot of my ballpens.
I bought a set of different colored pens for them to have unique pens and not fight over a certain ink, but after playing hide and seek, they lost some of my stuff. I didn’t require them to find it as they might get injured from getting scraped by bamboo.
Adi and KR are planning to build a salon someday, which I intend to visit; Stef still wants to become an engineer, and Adi wants to be a teacher. KR wants to become a flight attendant now. I ended that day with us playing. Then they found out that I sometimes filmed our sessions. It was a fun week with kids.
Not only were they learning from our lessons, but I did too. These kids have taught me how to be helpful in ways that can but do not really cost money, and I’m just happy teaching them. I’ll be happier when I see them succeed and get what they want in life.
Generally, it is hard to manage all this teaching stuff, especially since I am still a student. Technically, this is one of our projects in school, which is why it should be just 8 weeks and we were advised to just do it weekly. But I do it every day.
I do the session everyday because they might forget all the crucial things we learned in If we still had to wait for 7 days to learn again, chances are we can't really move forward to the next lesson because we're going to review the events of last week again.
Sure,the kids need time to rest. That's why I gave them the weekends. But their minds are easily forgotten and they would prefer to play. If we did it weekly for 5 hours, they would be bored and be unproductive all day. Plus, I consider practice as an essential tool in math. If you want to get better in math, practice, practice, and practice. I assure you that you should never stop practicing! You'll find it easier to calculate math equations in the long run.
It is also hard in the part where these kids have different needs, such that the other kids need math skills and others need reading skills at a different level. They also have their childish tantrums and boredom, which I also need to deal with. And you can't really go hard on them because they're kids and very fragile.
How much more can kids sulk and be stubborn if adults can? But all in all, I was really happy teaching them, even if that meant staying up late at night to check papers and track progress and waking up early to prepare the space and materials we needed.
Thank you so much for reading this, I hope you have enjoyed.
A Time spent with the Young Ones
Hello guys, this is your Angel Thain.
Well, if you remember I have been able to mention here one time that I was teaching kids and I do that everyday for 8 weeks, I just stopped now because the kids got busy with their Flores de Mayo. So here's a summary.
Week 1
Week 1, as what was planned, was reserved for observation, chilling, and some bonding with the students. For me, the day served as a refresher for the three children present at the time. We’ve read stories and scanned some materials. We read loud enough for the other kids to stay in our space.
The space we’ve been staying in was an unfinished two-story nipa house. We stay on the first floor of the house. The only materials we had at that time were the two books. One was full of fairytales and the other was a Filipino educational book with several figures featuring Rizal and other Filipino heroes.
That week, since I’m doing a session every day, has also become the pretest week where 28 items of all math operations have been allowed to be answered by Mariel and Stefano, the two kids who are a year older than Carah. Carah has to focus on reading English and Filipino stories properly.
Days after we welcomed our newcomers, KR, Rhea, and Addie, These kids, although it seems bigger, are actually just 7-8 years old, whose theoretical knowledge has not been built well with phonetics. I can still hear "e as in apple" and "e as in elephant" from them, which is an indication that they are still in the process of identifying letters and sounds properly. I intended to recount their progress one by one over the next few days, regardless of how long or short the session they were able to attend.
Week 2
Week 2 was for Carah. It was just her and Stefano in the video and we were marking poems or tula, short stories or maikling kwento, which included the piece, Ang alaga kong loro at Ang batang Matapat. On that day, we also classified professions and some public service and institutional functions. We have identified national symbols such as the national hero, Jose Rizal, the national fish, national flower, and national animal.
We also wrote some words in which they have found it hard to read in English, such as "bathed", "ocean", "peasant" from the story Hansel and Gretel, Princess and the Pea, and Beauty and the Beast. The long "a" sound was also given attention, such as lame, came, cake, rake, sale; the long i, such as dice, rise, lime, bike; and the long o, such as rose, hole, rope, and poke.
The emphasis of pronouncing the sound of each letter have also been discussed, such that F is pronounced with a softer sound, as in "father", and P as pronounced with a harder sound.
As always, she would complain for English being hard, especially when she’s chewing bubble gum and would rather settle into reading Filipino words. But as much as possible, I wanted them to embrace the things that have always been hard to them before, so that it’s easier for them to adapt someday to things that are more uncomfortable. The session that day ended with us playing a game.
Week 3
Week 3 is for Mariel, the girl who always has Makki, her baby brother, with her during every session, whether before or after. Mariel and Stef have the same level of grade and are on the same level of development in their educational approach, so I separate their lessons. The two scored only 10 out of 28 on the pre-tests because they became easily bored answering so many items in such a short period of time. , I figured that their attention span is just short enough that I needed the item to be broken down into separate lessons for them to master it thoroughly.
Mariel was a very artistic child, and I got a glimpse of that side of her when I started letting them borrow my art supplies. I at least have 6 of her drawings. She’s also a fast and passive learner. She won't participate in the discussion, but the day after, she already knows what I'm talking about. The kids would always love it when we do mental math and I’m letting them compete with each other to see who can always give the correct answer. I prepare ice candy from time to time to motivate them.
Mariel also lacks confidence and self-esteem, although she's jolly and it reflects on her mindset—revolving around the idea that she’s less than her classmates. In the last few days we’ve worked on improving her confidence and trust in her work. Because she is doing great, just like any other kid too.
Week 4
Stef, an appreciative only boy in my class, was the focus of the fourth week. Stef is actually the boy who's, I guess, perfect in attendance. He’s always attending classes but is fast to get bored, especially when he feels that nothing challenging is happening on the table. He’s a good English reader and a fast math solver. That is why I focused on teaching him how to read in Filipino.
He doesn’t know how to read in Filipino, so sometimes I can hear mispronunciation and slang in his words, like the simple "matapat" word, which cannot even be pronounced correctly by him. We have a series of readings in Filipino stories when it's reading time. I tend to separate him with Carah from the class since the two of them, from time to time, need to read Filipino pieces.
When it comes to math, Stef is easier to teach. He’s quick to solve, but he doesn’t want to show his process, but he knows the answer. I wanted them to know how to do it by the long method, so when anyone would require it, they would still know what to do. He’ll always end up sulking because he doesn’t want it.
In reading English, he’s very good already with words with complex pronunciations that can already be pronounced correctly, like palace, hurricane, exhibited, curiosity, and venture. I just limit his exposition in the English language because he’s very vocal in saying something when he hears a word being mispronounced.
Next time we'll see the Week 5 to Week 8 summary we'll also include some of my reflections during the session.
The real ones need a cup of seriousness.
Hello guys, this is Thain. For tonight's article, it's a bit different; not sciences and the like. Well, it's actually science but not medical or microbiological related. It's social science, which has included mental health.
So we had a forum earlier and we tend to discuss things regarding mental health and the romanticization of mental illness at this time when the discourse on this matter in the Philippines is already widespread. It is slightly controversial because the prevalence of these theories has led to a number of people, particularly youth, exaggerating their symptoms, encouraging self-harming behaviors, and promoting self-diagnosis.
We have been encouraged to give insights on this topic and yes, the ideas on my mind are battling with each other, but I was able to write some and I'm sharing it now.
Data alone can speak to how the percentage of people being vocal about an issue, whether social or political, has inflated over the years. In Chapter 4 of the book, On Life Manifesto, it is carefully laid out in detail how the internet and modernity have caused the system to shift from the traditional approaches of enlightenment and social criticism, which are exclusive to two people, to a world where a particular matter is being catered to by the majority.
Thus, it has become common for people of this generation to be frequently dubbed as stereotype and barrier breakers. However, as much as we want to give praise to the open-mindedness of most people regarding an issue, some sounds are not just appropriate to be voiced, especially those who glorify the mere existence of a stigma.
In the present century, health has become significant. The difference is that health now doesn't just revolve around the physical for one to be healthy on an optimum scale; other aspects such as mental, social, and spiritual have also been catered to. It has become a norm to care for each aspect when something is wrong, whether a campaign or counseling is made accessible.
The conflict arises when the information available through these campaigns is used as a basis to exaggerate and justify one's illness instead of seeking professional help. And although there are some people who are truly mentally unstable, a portion of the population treats this as another normal thing that can be used in any context.
I'm pretty sure none of you here would tell me "I have never seen on social media such words as I'm depressed right now, I'm having an anxiety attack as of the moment."
Yes, that is because it has already become the norm for these terms to be used interchangeably without consulting the nature of these terms. Although we can't dismiss their emotions, we are aware in the back of our minds that phrases like those have connotations that aren't really associated with seriousness, but rather with attention-seeking and clout-chasing behavior.
And this is just a short one as the words required were limited, but I'm sure to write some of these in the next article. So if you like this, stay tuned so we can discuss and share. Thank you for reading and supporting me as always.
Microbe says, "The Small Ones matter too"
Hello, guys this is your Angel, Thain. In this article, we will look at various methods for determining whether a bacteria is motile, or whether it can move, and why it is important for bacteria to be motile.
But first I have here some pictures I'd taken earlier.
So if you guys are not aware, these black pigments are not dust, they are molds. Molds are fungi, not bacteria, and they tend to grow in environments that are favourable, such as damp and moist ones.
Molds usually don't appear in a place for no reason. It cannot be magical. When you have mold in your indoor items or foods, it is because mold spores, which are airborne, are able to drop in that certain area. And when that area is favorable for a spore, it will eventually multiply.
Thus, the continuous study of microbial organisms, including molds, has no doubt led humanity to a more progressive world. The constant interaction that occurs within species of these tiniest organisms enables breakthroughs in different fields, lowering the gaps in existing literature and knowledge about the human body.
Well, do molds reveal something in the human body? Well, some fungi that are pathogenic can be subjected to laboratory studies, which include their interaction with the human body and how they can trigger physiological mechanisms.
As time progresses, the number of diseases cured has shown a largely significant increase. It was even calculated that by the mid-1960’s, following the strengthening of germ theory, several scientists had already shifted to treating chronic illnesses as infectious diseases had been uncovered.
However, these took a lot of time to become possible, and it is realistic enough to say that within those years, several diseases have also come into existence. Viruses have been given enough time to produce variants as well as become more resistant to the present drugs created to combat them.
In order to better understand this, we need to realize the parts that these organisms use to get ahead—size and speed. In studying unicellular organisms like archea and bacteria, we learned that they have these tails that enable them to transfer from one place to another, which makes them present in areas they can penetrate.
The size of these organisms has also played a role in their presence everywhere. Because they are small, they can easily enter the human body. Viruses, for instance, adapt to the process of molecular hijacking, where they take over the host cell and start building new copies of their genetic material the moment they enter a host.
In the case of bacteria, which are organisms that do not exhibit variation in their genetic material, they can grow in numbers as they are fast at creating colonies of identical cells.
Relative to this, if a bacterium is pathogenic, then this implies danger and needs to be eliminated. Conversely, if this bacterium is helpful, like Lactobacillus, then it needs to be multiplied.
Hence, the call for studying the morphological, cultural, and physiological characteristics of microorganisms has been intensified. Moreover, the chances of performing these observations while the organism is still alive are considered a top priority.
To fully address this, appropriate techniques for observing these living microorganisms should be integrated. Suspending them in a fluid such as water, saline, or broth as part of preparing a hanging drop or wet mount method is frequently done to ensure their suitability for the experiment to be performed.
Thus, it is important to note that these two, the hanging drop method and the wet mount method, are equally important in laboratory settings and thus need to be carried out properly.
In the next article, we will try to differentiate these methods for determining whether a bacteria is motile or not. Thank you for reading.
A Week Hiatus: Life Update
Hello guys, this is Thain. And yeah, I've been gone for a week or so, so I guess this one is a life update.
Last week was a draining, phenomenal and chaotic week. It actually managed to get me one week to become motivated again.
From acads to socio-political to mental and physical health issues. Originally, I thought I'd never be able to continue grinding. I was supposed to write a few days ago, but I decided not to and to focus on other things instead, but now I'm back in the game again.
You might not be oblivious to the recent election of the nation's leaders in the Philippines, and I'm pretty sure you have a divided opinion on that. Even the Filipinos are being loud in the aftermath of the election. I myself was very sad, not because of the results but because of the process.
Technically, since the Philippines is a democratic country, the majority will always be catered to, no matter how bad or how frustrating the results are in your point of view. You need to respect the vote of the majority. However, I feel violated by the way the COMELEC addressed the public.
Everyone has a right to vote. Why must some people be left uncatered for just because they're unable to make it to the cut-off time because some machines are not working? And why can't they tell the people that there are a lot of errors in vote transcription and vote returns and have it aired on national TV the quickness of the vote counts?
It's just too faulty and irresponsible of them to even blame it on the pandemic and the people the technicalities and errors of their committee and machineries.
Relative to this, I have been preoccupied with the way things turned out to be, and at some point, I was consumed with the loudness of the event. I forgot to check on myself and my overall health. I was just there, unproductive and unmovable. Well Harry Potter Series and Mangoes have quite comforted me
With all the things happening, it seemed that I had been lost for a while. Thank God I have found the strength to move forward and be able to cling to him again. Although the state of the masses is not that ideal right now and things are getting chaotic, most people are affected.
I pray to God that someday peace will reign on the islands. If this is his will, may he guide us in the next 6 years of our lifetimes. It might be unfitting in men's ways, but that's the point. The Lord thinks differently. And us, being powerless as of now, have to trust him fully. We need to trust him blindly.
I suddenly recall the story of Abraham. We were able to talk about him in one of our Sunday worship services. The Abraham story is found in the book of Genesis. And we have heard him as the man who has been given a child despite being an old man. The man whose child should be killed and offered to God on Mount Moriah. The one we know as the Father of Faith, the man who begs God not to pour out his wrath in the places of Sodom and Gomorra, and the man who's become the Grandfather of Israel, initially known as Jacob.
Most importantly, Abraham was the man to whom God promised as many descendants as the stars in the sky and sand on the beach.
I am blessed with Ambraham, formerly known as Abram's obedience and fauthfulness to Gid. Although there are instances in the Bible where he was gravely worried about what might happen to him, he decides by his own will and not by God's, his story has been summarized as those where blessings have been abundant.
God is a God of Detail. If you recall in Noah's story, he tells him to build an Ark with a long list of specifics: the ark measurements and the number and classes of animals boarding in. He was a God of detail, but when it comes to Abraham, he simply tells him to go.
"Go to the place I told you to go.."
There are no further details on when he will arrive, how long he will travel, how far the location is, or why he needs to get there.
And Abraham went, no question asked, no complaint. He simply went and trusted God blindly. And the moment he stopped at the place, the Lord immediately granted him his reward.
Thus, this reminds me that when God allows something to happen, as long as we trust his will, he'll bless us more than we imagine. For God's heart will always be to bless people and to be able to reconcile with each other. And while I have been placed in this state, I am empowered to trust God and obey his will amid all storms. God bless you.
In the next few days, I might start to write continuously again. Thank you for all the support and sponsorship 😊.
@Black_Angel
