Are you an achiever? Do you consistently get high marks in every test that everyone thinks you are made that way? That is just normal for you to get a high score because you are born intelligent. Where you reached a certain point that, the people's praises for you turns into a heavy pressure sitting on your shoulders?
Achievements and recognition are something that anyone can be proud of. People feel motivated whenever they're recognized for a job well done. But as to what extent can the one's flattering recognition far can go?
She was an achiever since kindergarten. She would always get high scores in her test. People around her, her family, relatives, friends and classmates are all aware of the things she achieved. As times goes by, this has been a label as a "normal thing" for her and people are no longer in awe whenever she has achieved something. It is because it was "her".
At first, she didn't mind it as it was just another way of praising her. They said it because they believed she was capable of anything and she perceived it as a recognition. Whenever they have a test, her classmates would say "I think "she" will be getting the highest mark again". Another classmate would then say, "Of course she's intelligent, it was just normal she would get high marks".
But little they know, she never achieved those things just because she was "intelligent or genius". She didn't get high scores just because it was normal for her. She achieved things through her efforts. She study hard whenever they have a test. She would always do her best in anything she do. It was alright, she was alright. She was happy for herself and flattered by people praises.
But she was pushed to her limits.
She no longer put effort because she wanted to, but was driven by pressure of the people around her. She was constantly chasing perfection because she was afraid she would lose her recognition. Her only identity. Her tag name. She was afraid to fail. She was afraid of people's judgement.
Her biggest nightmare became a reality.
For once she was not on top. She didn't get the highest mark but only the second highest. If you look at it, it was still a great achievement. But everyone took it as a surprise. She only get the 2nd highest mark? Why? Is she sick? Do you think she was distracted by something? I can't believe it. I think she wasn't that great after all.
Can you believe it? Are you one of those people? Do you see your "one classmate" as always the best and would never fail? That it was only normal she/he would get the highest mark. Have you ever asked yourself why? Why did she/he get the highest mark? What did sh/he do? Have you ever think of that?
We tend to over praise people that it comes to the point we are putting pressure on them. We only see the things they achieved without actually looking to all the efforts they spent just to reach the top. Nobody was born overnight as a genius. Yes, there are certain individuals who are indeed intelligent but they still spent effort. They don't just magically transform everything into success. Even the inventors of today's greatest technology has experienced countless failures. So never ever praise someone in a way that makes them feel pressured. Sure thing, it is not a bad thing to praise people's achievements but do it in a way that you recognize the efforts spent behind those achievements and not just look at what they achieved. Praise the efforts and hardwork spent instead of saying, "you're great and intelligent it is normal you would achieved anything."