Hello! Friends! I'm back with another set of personal development tips; I wish this could be linked to my previous article, but let's move on from here!
We are leaders in one way or another, and one of our responsibilities is to be able to communicate as a leader, whether it is a husband, brother, sister, father, mother, or the like, hence whenever we are in a position to guide, we should use the appropriate words.
21/5/2021
We all have times in our lives when we need to give guidance and counsel to others. One's son, husband, friend, neighbor, or parents are frequently counseled. The advice's eventual result is frequently determined by its starting.
Meaning, if the advice is offered appropriately and tenderly from the start, the end effect is frequently the same. The end outcome will be similar if it is provided angrily and callously. When we give people advice, we are dealing with their hearts, not their bodies. As a result, children frequently follow their mother's advice but not their father's, and students frequently accept one teacher's advice but not another's. The first technique to employ while giving counsel is to refrain from overdoing it and picking on every flaw, big or tiny, so that others do not get the impression that you are continuously watching their every move. Otherwise, they'll think of you as very cumbersome. A people's leader is not someone who makes mistakes. A people's leader is the one who pretends to be stupid. If you can express your counsel as a suggestion rather than a recommendation, you should.
For instance, your wife gives you supper, and you know she has worked hard to prepare it, and it is really salty. Do not exclaim, "Oh no!"
Is this some sort of meal? You must have poured the entire packet of salt into this!” Instead, remark, "It would have tasted even better if you had reduced the amount of salt." In the same way, if you find your son wearing dirty clothes, tell him as if you're giving a suggestion, because no one likes to be told what to do. “Wouldn't it be good if you dressed better?” said to him. “How lovely would it be if you weren't late again?” remark to a pupil who arrives late to school. This is a considerably better strategy. “How about if you do this?” says the speaker. That is what I recommend you do.”
This approach is preferable to you saying, "You have no manners!" How many times have I told you, but you still don't get it? How much longer do you want me to tell you this?” Allow him to keep his honor and make him feel important, even if he makes mistakes. Do you understand why? Because the goal here is to correct the error, not to exact revenge or to dishonor him. To put it bluntly, no one enjoys being bossed around. A man borrowed a book from one of the forefathers. When he returned the book after a few days, it was soiled with food stains, as if it had been used to transport bread or grapes. The book's owner remained silent. After a few days, the same man returned to borrow another book from him. He presented him with the book on a plate. “I only want the book,” the man stated.
“How come you're giving me a plate?” 'The book is for you to read, and the plate is for you to carry food in,' he replied. He took the book and walked away, having learned his lesson.
Closing thought
if you need to give an example when advising, try not to use yourself as an example and instead remember your bravery and glorious actions. Only mention others in such a way that the person receiving advice does not feel as if you are degrading him while praising yourself.
