A word that wants to say, a word of the feeling that wants to make peace. And even though it's only one word. Words that can define second by second are ticking. Like, can stop the pulse beating without stopping.
Hopefully, that word will be delivered. A daydream about words and just wind and then easily disappear without a trace. But has made complacent and fell in the word.
Maybe even if it's just a word, it's so beautiful for me when it can be said. If that sounds bad in your ears then forgive is just a word I wanted to say.
Do you know what makes me like you? And you know what makes me can't to forget you? 2 think that I wanna ask for those of someone I love but still doubt and are afraid of my presence.
But before you answer all that and before you say it what you wanna say. I want you to know everything that has been going on in my heart as long as I love and miss you even if, I will never get a word from you.
Shame to love and too much embarrassed to say I miss you. And afraid that maybe you will hate me and afraid you really don't allow me to know the situation about you. Missing you is so sick I guess. Even though I can only see and never speak directly with you, I always miss wanting to ask about your day and your condition.
Loving you turns out to make me always miss your current existence. Loving you makes me sick but I don't want to lose it if I think about you. Loving you makes me feel shackled by a feeling that I will never have. Loving you made me realize how much I try, I couldn't convince you and that makes me was actually afraid not to have you.
Trying to forget you is not easy to make sure my day will be a good day. Trying to forget you is not easy to allow me to accept the reality away from you. Trying to forget you is not easy to just say sorry I love you too much. Trying to forget you is not easy to get rid of the image of your and all my dream with you.
There is too much for me and my thoughts about the things that keep us from can being together. Differences in language, culture, and religion. It was all like a fiction story and it didn't deserve to be believed. And indeed my existence and who I am not always getting a woman as good as you even though I expect your smile for me.
One hope is not much to hope for. The dreams of self have not dreamed much anymore. Even a prayer will not be answered for the word of love that I so desperately crave until this day. It's not that I give up and don't want to try or prove it, but there are so many things that make the reality unfulfilled.
My longing is one with a thousand fears of losing you. My longing meets the emptiness of my love. To say miss you does not deserve to be heard and felt by women like you from me.
Because my longing is just a longing without a longing that deserves to be repaid for a word of longing too.
The sweetness of your smile that I always remember when I close my eyes as if you are right beside me, the warmth of all the attention I want to feel, and the intense fear of losing myself is just an unfulfilled image. This feeling is too passionate to mingle with the sight of you.
Angry with who I am, because of how to love you. Couldn't, how can this love be true. Finally realized that I was only someone who could love and dreamed of being loved completely by you.
From me who loves you and from you who will be so easy to forget me, and from me who never deserves to get the couplets of love to you. Let me say and call you "honey". Even if it's only for the first and the last, I want to say to call you. Honey, you are the most beautiful even for a moment and in the shadow. Honey, longing, and love were created for you.