Dusk passed very quickly as the rain became increasingly heavy. The lightning that suddenly struck preceded the lightning-like camera awakened my reverie that could be counted more than ten minutes. That long time contains fantasies about that perfect figure.
I am a favorite vocational high school student in my area, I am usually called Risa even though my real name is on the Risma Ersa Al Dzikra.
"Just study so you can be a smart kid"
"You want to study? Why don't you? "
"yes. This is better than I'm upset "
"Uh, you miss upset"
"Yee ... let it be, it's cool!"
While ignoring my brother's taunts, I started to open textbooks that looked worn, well maybe they weren't opened often.
The nights have changed, late at night has also welcomed. Mata is no longer friendly with those books. I decided to go to sleep, lay down unwind and intend to really sound asleep closed my eyes.
"Hey eyes, when did you start to close? It is late. Hey brain, what do you think? Immediately rest, I'm tired! " I muttered that night who could not fall asleep because I was thinking about something. Something? I guess it's not something but it's you. My life actor who is always perfect in my mind, always perfect in my sight.
"Ah never mind, he's just my imagination. I don't think I should continue like this. Whether or not I could try to close my eyes at that time, afraid of being late and late to go to school.
Again that morning will be preceded by those damn chickens. It turns out that the spirit of getting up in the morning is still inferior to the chicken.
"Just fry it chicken?" high levels of emotion
"Why are you? Grumble in the morning? " replied the brother
"Ah, damn it is a really noisy chicken!"
"Hello? It's noon little brother, wake up !! " how painful it was that the stab from my brother at that time made me impatient to reply.
Activity continues, now I go to school earlier than usual. As if there was a desire that moved me to get to school faster. Either because of the enthusiasm for learning or there is another desire. His smile, too cute to lie to this morning. His eyes, too dear to pass up when I ran into the opposite direction with him. He? "Perfect," I said softly so she couldn't realize. "Ah fantasy, it will be imaginary" until the word is forgotten.
At half-past ten, a break of fifteen minutes is used by most of the SMK residents to save money. Save in the canteen to be exact. I also did not escape from the crowd, snacking with my friends. They are best friends, call it Gia, Diah, and Ruri. Friends love my sorrow even though I feel a lot more grief. They are the place where I get excited.
"Stop!" I shouted hysterically
"Why the heck, you're like a cop"
"Good afternoon miss, can you see the letters?"
"What letter is it, sir? Al-Ikhlas? Or Yasin's letter? "
"Uh, digress you guys, what's wrong?"
"There ... ah usually the cause of confusion"
"Ow he, eh perfect delusion that"
“Husstt !! Shut up. Really lazy!"
It seems that I'm hypocritical, but they still understand what I feel. Comforting me so that I still look cheerful has become their staple food. You mean so much to me, that sometimes it seems like I can't repay your kindness anymore.
"Risa!" call someone, as I memorized by heart with that voice. A wise voice that I was waiting for.
"Yes, What is up?"
"No business, lazy to call you without a reason"
"Oh, why?"
"How many children do you house elephant?"
"My house is not a zoo boy!"
"Ow, forgot, did you go ahead?"
"yes!"
Things like that often make me fantasize about something that is not natural. How could a guy so perfect see people like me? It's still in a running position and confidently I daydream. It's dangerous, isn't it?
The heaps of admiration that if written might turn into a painful novel seemed like I couldn't bear it. Imagine how heartbroken it is, when you have to turn your face away and don't admit it, you can't avoid hypocrites anymore. Until sometimes I'm really tired of hiding all this. No different, I planted cacti in the vast field of the psir in my heart. Stabbed, that delusion is a Ruma, more precisely 'Ruma Kama Dikya'. How could I have to change schools, it's stupid just because of excessive admiration with my schoolmates. I will not finish when there is no outlet like this.
"In the morning daydreaming again, yo, upset?"
"No, this time it's worse"
"What?! How come?"
"I don't deserve to lie wide this morning"
As hard as I could hold back, those eyes that could not bear. While hugging my best friend Gia, I stared at the corner that was their favorite place. Ruma and Eri, my imaginary girlfriend and owner of Ruma's heart.
"Even though I don't experience, but I feel"
"I don't want you to feel it"
"But this must be friends to feel"
Imagine their kindness, which instantly relieved my fatigue that was flowing. I am like a miss seagrass who daydreams without knowing the time, place, and atmosphere.
The day continued as usual, but things were different lately. I no longer deserve to be called Miss Seagrass, because they are my best friends who know that I am keeping myself busy. This is only part of a strategy so that I can really use my long time to something more useful. Even though sometimes that smile, the smile of a Ruma is still able to make me fly back to the imaginary world. Just be grateful I can reduce my bad habit.
Indonesian Language lessons started. At that time we had the task of creating poetry, without provisions whether it was real or imagined.
"Risa, are you done?"
"Yes, Mom"
"Ready to go?"
"Oh yes, ma'am I'm ready!"
A golden opportunity to reveal reality, even if he wouldn't understand either. Yes, we are not in the same class. How could he hear my poetry?
In the silence of this evening
I'm still speechless for you
In complete darkness tonight
I still fantasize about you
About that silent admiration
Which day after day is never certain
In the late evening
Send those longing greetings to you
In order to be carried away with the wind
After everyone read their own poetry, the class was over. I hurried home so as not to meet Ruma.
"Why hurry? "Said the house while chasing me
"Yes, an elephant wants to give birth!"
"Oh, still elephants?"
"Yes .. Ruma's name, want to visit?"
"Damn you!"
Right? Even though I intend to avoid why do I end up together like this? I feel uncomfortable with Eri.
I see the relationship is getting closer and closer. Are they dating right? Or Eri just borrowed my soul mate to be his guy. I don't know that everything is the destiny of the Almighty. I'm starting to forget that the feeling was just admiration, how come it turned out like this.
One week passed, the SMK national exams were just getting close. I'm not that worried because I've been preparing for it long ago. My gaze fixed on the torn pieces of paper folded in my package book. I read it quickly.
Risa ... it's not that I don't understand what you mean
I'm still waiting for that fate
I'm also with him
This really hurts
But this is life, and I don't want you to waste it
I will also not escape if one day that fate
Will unite, the spirit of risa sunny day welcomes our beautiful smiles
Unexpectedly that was the answer to my poetry at that time. How did he know? Did he hear ?.
Thanks to that letter, I seemed to wake up from my dream. He cares for me and that's more than enough for me.
"Now rarely upset?" Ruri asked teasingly.
"Ow yes please, say no to upset!"
"Haha, please. Uh, get your greetings "
"from?"
"From Niko next-door friend"
"OK, just greetings back"
Niko, a classmate next door, since the delivery of greetings he always approached me. Come like an angel to me, and the only boy who can make me smile. Until one day in the school garden, he acted differently.
"I ... I'm not the type who likes lengthy"
"So what?" still confused by what Nico said
"I like you!" he replied firmly
"Eh seriously, don't joke too much!"
"This is real!" said Niko once again
I was silent, I could not say anything else, at once the conversation became silent.
I began to feel the awkwardness, Niko more often avoided me. I also can't do much because I don't have any feelings for Niko. The national exams have passed, and this time it is the graduation announcement. No matter what kind of results I got, I really can't predict. After a while, I found out the results. Happy cheers from my friends represent the happiness of all of us because of the satisfying results.
"Congratulations, yes," said Ruma to me
"Yes your grades are also good" I answered spontaneously
Ruma was here again, how could I not be nervous that time. Ruma will continue to college which is of course the same as Eri. Really sucks the things I feel.
I chose a college that is a little far from Ruma. Looking for a new world out there. Many also hope to find a better destiny and be able to get out of the past's shackles. Several months passed, I never heard again from a house. In that instant, my cellphone rang and I immediately picked it up.
"Hello too, who is it?" I seem familiar with his greeting voice
"Ruma, how are you?" he replied and continued asking
"Ow you, reportedly still elephant livestock"
"Hahhaha .. just remember you"
The conversation lasted about half an hour. He also accidentally said that he would get engaged to Eri soon, so I wanted to throw my cellphone at that time. Ruma, is he my match or not? My optimism has melted away, I'm not sure if Eri is just borrowing my soul mate. Never mind I have to be completely sincere, after all they are just about to become retired. If indeed Ruma is my match he will also come back, just like he said at that time. "I will also not avoid it if one day fate will unite" I really can't forget.
If the delusion has indeed been happy with the other, I have little hope of being with him. Didn't I just admire it at first? I don't know what will happen. I also want to be happy when the fate line of the delusion is happy with the others. He is with himself.