Unsatisfied desire

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Avatar for Abuside
3 years ago

As I walked down the aisle in the twilight, it seemed to me that there was no such thing as a cursed life at the end of the day, when a dear young face in the wretched house, with his ‘pitiful longing for black eyes’, did not look for the light of evening! My own anguish and anger at the west gate of the sky in the evening - they agreed with me, looking at me with tears in their eyes. As he walked along the silent path of the membrane-toned field, he thought to himself, 'Only that one star of the evening understands your pain!' If one goes from a village of pain to another village, one goes on a narrow field of empty field in the evening. This evening star shines like a piece of fresh cut-collage in front of him, but he will understand how much chest-cracking pain he felt at that time and began to oppress him. Nothing can be heard in the empty chest of this dirty field, just where the evening sits and sings the Baul with a ‘dust-flurry’ whistle, and its fine silk flies like a silken thread and touches my mind! One by one they are coming together in the courtyard of the sky, so in my mind so many latent words of many days, many lost memories are emerging one after another. I have this same thing, the same pain that I remember in so many ways, there are no more numbers

My mind could not escape the intense sweetness of this pain. As the snake can't leave the manik and go out of the light of that maniktukur, so have I. I could not escape the illusion of unreasonable arrogance of Manik Bednatuku in my chest! In the distance, returning to the market, a sad village-bride was singing in the sweet melody of the field, - ‘My mind is crying for the next one, alas, when will it be yours again?’ I said in my mind - it is unfortunate, it is yours; But many do not understand that. As soon as I leave the treasure in my chest, people misunderstand and say, ‘What happens next?’ And no one has left me by making such a mistake, it is not to forget the pain! The song of that soul of the pathless girl reminded me of another arrogant woman. That heart-rending memory is floating in my hair Jamuna again and again like a sailing dinghy! In that, my identity is not only from childhood - but also long before that; He doesn't remember that day of eternal identity, I don't remember either. তার His house is in our neighborhood. I especially needed him when my hands were squeezing to kill someone.

A-mara was also special again; When there was a reason to kill, I would not kill him, but to kill without a reason was my whim. I don't know if he liked my beating, but if he hadn't beaten me for two days, he would have come to me and smiled and said, 'Where are you, brother, you haven't beaten me for two days?' , I will not kill you again! 'After that, whatever good things were in front of my hands at that time, so that with him, my soul would be deeply satisfied! It seemed that he might forget my injury. Tearing pictures from books and giving them to him was my most precious gift. For this, I often had to stand in the school all day listening. But when I saw that great gift he had given me, he took it from the area with great interest and gave it to his doll's bed, or stuck it with rice on the wall of his playroom, then I forgot all the insults of my school. But I couldn't see that big cat of his with my own eyes, the one who would caress him so much day and night, it was as if it was not with me. He used to glue the best picture of me one day on the back of the kitten to make me angry. I also used to show Tribhuvan to his cuddly kitten with a slap. Seeing him, I also understand the time Whenever he was angry or his face was covered with pots and pans, I would leave him crying with a loud fog. Then who sees my joy! The more she cried, the more I broke my face and cried and stood by myself. One day, I would leave five black spots on the skin of his back, but I would leave! I was amazed to see that he had become quite disciplined after being beaten; And, how can I forget everything in a minute and bring a smile to my face with tears in my eyes, pull my fingers and let them boil, - ‘You have to break the naughty fingers of this Marhatta hand completely! Then let me see how you hit me with that chubby hand of yours! 'Seeing his smile, I would get angry and kick him on the back and say,' Then I will beat you on the back like this! ' He used to chase me with a stick, then he would laugh and fall down completely! The body would gurgle in anger. So whenever I found him again, I would beat him and beat him. One day or the other, I would break into his playroom and make it all my own. On this day, he would get really angry and put a big stick on my back and hide for fifteen days, never coming in front of me for fear of anything.

At that time I was very sad. Aa malo, what happens to my buffalo skin in the house of O-lathi? And that's it! So the monkey will be hiding like that? After that, when I used to swear and swear and call him, he would take my long hair and cut all the crooked and straight curls and say, 'Look, brother, I will never hit you again! If Marie is a bug in my hand, it will be an insect! ’Then he would suddenly say, - Don’t give it to me, brother, I will tie your hair with my ribbon. … After crossing a little road in this empty field, the eternal listener of my mind asked, - Yes brother, what happened after that? The narrator of my hair seems to have lost his words in the stillness of this silent evening for a while! Suddenly he was hurt by the silence and said, ‘No - I love you! I lied that day, Pearl, I lied! ’His mischievous remorse sounded like a bitter melody in the evening! - He calmed down again and blew the trumpet in his melody! Ever-thirsty, my ever-thirsty soul began to drink the melody of the soul!

I said, - ‘I have only deceived you with lies for so long, Moti, I have never truly loved you.’ My voice seemed to dry up. Standing with a radiant vigor like a wounded fan, he roared, - ‘Go away - I want you, go away. You are more cruel than the executioners, Bay-Dil! - Go away, go away. ি Fall at your feet and go away, and do not insult my love. 'Pressing with both hands and hands, he ran away with the insane speed like the whirlwind of Kalbaishakhi. As I staggered and turned my head, I heard someone groaning and groaning in the courtyard of the marriage-house with deep cries, 'Mother-go.' The cry has come out, it is as if it is the word of my mind, - mind-boatman, take your boat, I can't get out anymore. ' Now give me cool, or give me a call! - I have a big pain in my mind, he may not understand my pain. If he only knew how much my own chest was torn apart by the pain of my own chest when I went to hurt the one I love, Moti could understand that. A: If the one I love misunderstands me, then what do I live for? What is the success of my empty life? Alas, there is no greater pain in the world. This is the mango orchard in my village. That is my closed dark house. There is a lamp-lit noise-filled Snehniketan on all four sides, and in the midst of it my dark cottage is awake like a poisonous curse shell. The word that comes to my mind every day when I return home from work without any work after opening the lock of the closed door is still burning in the forest of eternal pain in my mind. Lamps will be lit in all the houses one by one, only in my house, the evening lamp will not be lit any more. No black-eyed wretch will wake up desperately hoping for me to come next to that dim lamp-flame! Outside, at my broken door, the wind was blowing and the Karbala-matam was screaming, 'Alas, homeless, alas, the wayfarer! Alas, the speedless one!' - Lose! '

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Avatar for Abuside
3 years ago

Comments

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3 years ago

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3 years ago

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3 years ago

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3 years ago

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3 years ago

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3 years ago