@gertu13
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Erratic Thoughts. A long time ago I used to think that a pefectly capable person should not ask for money on the streets.
Today my thoughts have changed. I see so many people on the street asking for one thing and the other. I believe that your physical state is not what limits your situation, it's the mind. The mind or rather the way of thinking of the individual, is what makes him think in relation to fatalism and not towards positive thinking. Any opinion from strangers brings you a negative response. Nothing that the other person who is giving an opinion about the situation that the person in question can recommend will make you change your mind. The person is mechanically primed for denial with some positive response. Is it this mentality that makes it difficult for a person in trouble to solve something? Or is it simply that the individual has already used all the ideas and situations and could not get away with it? ... And that leads him to make the decision to be asking in the streets? Sometimes I think that many people find it easier to go out into the streets every day, lie to ask, and thus use the way we interpret their need and give in coins what the individual who asks for money really intends. In reality, there may be several factors that intervene in the idea of going out and submitting to such a precarious situation. Really needing money for a current emergency, wanting to manipulate people's feelings and thus take advantage of taking money from them. Or tired of so much need, there is no choice but to ask and ask until you get. I think that it's better that we help in whatever way we can and do not judge what we do not know.
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I still think that a perfectly capable person should not be a beggar on the street. It is tiring for having a lot of needs that cannot be accomplished because of some barriers and other in capability but I believe that as long as my physical is well and my mind is calm, somethings can ne work out to solve the problems. I too want to help others in any way I can but I believe before I can do that, I need to help myself first. Once I am settled, it will be my turn to help those who have to help me during my worst moment.
A perfectly capable person should be a beggar? I think the main problem is while raising children we do not learn them to save money. We do not let them focus on a day after tomorrow. If you can make a budget, a plan how to pay off it's good because you can see what to do, what not to do to pay off debts or simply have a good, reasonable life. If you do not make such a plan, do not stick to it and reread it you only see a mountain of problems. I know it helped me and still does even if it takes me a year. I have a goal and focus on that not the issues, rocks on the road I need to take. I agree with you. You need to help yourself first before you can help someone else. It's pointless to give away what you need for you or your kid next day or week. 💕🍀
The first sentence is wrong. I meant shouldn't. I have a long terms plan that I hope will work well.
That is to help only when you are very well and then think about others? It should not be like that. We should always help, share what we have and expect nothing in return. But the reality is different. We only help when we want, not when we can. We share what we have, not what we have. That's fine? I don't think we're very good at it. This is a very difficult thing to do.
It means you help when you are well enough to manage yourself. You can really miss what you give away. This has nothing to do with being wealthy. Wealthy people only give because they do not need to pay taxes. Can you help me to pay my next taxes coming up it's about 1000 euro which is more than 1000 $/ I doubt you will do that even if you have food on your table and plants who provide you in food. Taxes might be not an issue where you live but it is where I live and all those taxes I pay have nothing to do with my earnings but the country I live in. Just for being around I need to pay. Not for running my own business or earning a lot.
I don't think I am in the situation to go out to ask for money. And much less am I going to knock on doors to ask for help to pay my taxes of $ 1,000 or more. I go out to order a plate of food. An old shoe that you don't need. A dress or pants that you no longer use, that is what I would go out to ask for on the street. Cover my basic needs. Can somebody help me? Noooo, I do not have an old pants to give away, no, I do not have a spare bread, I do not have a rest of food. I kept it for myself, for later. That help is what I mean.
I think there's no need to manipulate and lie if you are really in need. If you are in need you can make that clear and it's up to the one who has something to share if he/she is willing to do so. It's not wrong to ask around. We all know what is worthless to one can have a lot of value to someone else. Not each person has a big family or many friends who can help out. I think for an introvert it will be more difficult to ask than it is for an extrovert. The extrovert is the smooth talker, can be charming, and is a manipulator but to me also someone who easily wastes money because thinking about the future or a few days ahead is not what he/she does. If I help people I do it on my terms, not because they are out of alcohol or cigarettes. I am not going to support that because both are expensive and I do not have the money myself to waste on that. Same as gambling and other luxury products. Many people worldwide are suffering and the fact is you cannot help them all. The other fact is I have a hard time too, I need to pay my bills as well and my first responsibility is my children, not someone else's. If I get ill or end up on the street no one will help me. This is reality. I can knock on no one's door. I do not have family, nor friends which means I need a plan B in case of need and even a plan C. This is how I live my entire life, thinking far ahead about the future, years ahead, saving literally the food out of my mouth to realize what is needed most. To me, it's a car but therefore no fridge, microwave, coffeemaker, clothes, shoes, new pans, a housekeeper, frequently shopping, tv, satellite internet, phone calls, firewood during cold winters, etc etc.
I believe that many people have difficult life situations. The situation of each individual person is his own priority. We cannot work based on thinking about helping others in their needs. But the opportunity to help someone in conflict suddenly presents itself. The point is not to help everyone. The question is can I help this person at this particular time? Usually we can, but our mind wanders thinking about so many things. That is not criticized, nor is it judged. It's just my thought!
We have indeed and it's not because people live in a country different from ours they are per se poor or rich. Some people always beg because it's easy to live on the costs of someone else. It's easier than looking for a job and the "trouble" working 8-10 hours a day and driving 3 hours a day up and down. Others work their asses off and still have hardly a cent left for food after they paid all taxes and the high costs for living. 10$ means a lot to you but it does to me too although I can hardly buy healthy food (fruit, vegetables, meat) for it.
Now I think you understand my point. What you say answers one of my concerns in the text. There are people who go out asking just because it is easier for them to take advantage of others.
But how to change that? The only way is to help if it feels good for you, if you can miss it and don't need it back. Many made a profession out of taking advantage. I learned it the very hard way, several times I fell for it. The question you should ask yourself is "Will that person do the same for me?" Most likely the answer is no.
It is a mistake to think that when you help a person you should ask yourself if that person would help you. When you help, you give, and you release. Don't expect anything in return. At least from that person. Because life itself is in charge of doing you a greater good. If you don't get help from someone you helped then you feel bad, that's why it is said "do good without seeing who."
That is your opinion not mine. It is about the intention. Many people, those abusers do not intend or even consider to ever help you out. Being helpful is not part of a parasite's being.
If those people lie on streets begging who are equipped with physical capability to work then giving them is a mistake. We are just tolerating their laziness. Why the handicap individuals could find a means to live even in a meager income, and those on the streets could not? They have all the advantage compared to those who have physical disability. Tolerance on their ways of life lead them to be that way unto the rest of their life. Even the children were being manipulated by them.
It is true what it says. But sometimes those physically fit people have mental limitations. That prevents them from opening the way to obtain sustenance. It is also true that by giving what people ask for and if they are faking their precarious situation. What we do is increase and encourage their bad way of living in life. Sometimes in these situations you do not know what to think or what to do.