Who is fantagira?
*7th of June 2021* Recently **@Olasquare** asked me about the origin of my nickname. I gave him a brief explanation, but of course there is more to it. I get asked about my nickname often, so instead of explaining it every time somebody asks, I can send them a link to this article, which explains it abundantly. https://read.cash/@Olasquare I think I was 13 or 14 when by some miracle I was allowed to spend a night outside my parents place. My dad must have been away and I probably came up with some intricate lie to make it happen. Mind you, before mobile phones this was somewhat easier to arrange AND not get caught. I say a miracle, because my parents had to be extra careful, as we were under the care of social workers due to our past. **Let me tell you about my well hidden past, which I don’t usually discuss with anyone. It’s a small part of it, but you’ll get an idea.** When I was 11, my brother and I were taken away from my parents, because my dad was in prison and my mum had a breakdown and was also taken to a mental hospital. I was doing my best to keep myself and my 8 years old brother clean, fed and attending school and was hoping that with the help of a neighbour we can survive until mum is back from the hospital. Some of the neighbours thought otherwise and sent a social worker my way, who in turn arranged for us to be taken away. Firstly we spent 2-3 months in an emergency orphanage. There were no foster families in Poland. Just big buildings with a lot of kids like us, whose parents were not able to look after them for whatever reasons. It wasn’t all that bad - I found a friend who bullied me on a regular basis and I joined the same local dance team which she attended for a while before me. We also had free access to a swimming pool, which we visited frequently during the weekends. My mum was out of the hospital by then and came to visit us, but I wasn’t all that keen on her visits, as she wasn’t her normal self yet. Later we were taken to an even further away town to a more permanent orphanage. Weirdly enough, I was somewhat happy. My life has become peaceful. I had a room that I shared with 1 other person and every night I could fall asleep without worrying that my dad might come back home drunk in the middle of the night and throw a tantrum. My bully friend and her sister were also moved there at the same time and together we found yet another dance team to join. This time we also had free access to an ice rink as well as a swimming pool and bus/tram pass. We had a lot of privileges just because we were poor. Every summer the building was undergoing some reconstructions and all kids were assigned 2 different vacations. Usually 1 abroad and one on a scout campsite in some beautiful parts of Poland, where we slept in tents, learned survival skills, sang songs and did other scout things. All fun, although I remember escaping from one of those campsites and making our way back to the orphanage. I think partly it was a ‘cool’ thing we heard other kids did and partly we didn’t like the idea of going for another half day long pilgrimage, so we went ahead of everyone and took a train back ‘home’. Our guardians were not impressed and the renovations were not yet finished, so we were taken right back to the campsite. We were a seasonal heroes though :D Overall I quite enjoyed the 2 years we spent away from my parents house. Apart from dancing and skating I also learned how to smoke cigarettes, had my first kisses and first boyfriends. As much as I love my mum, I wasn’t all that keen on going back to my parents once my dad was out of prison and they finally ‘won us back’ in court. I had no idea what to expect and I also wasn’t keen on going to a 4th different primary school, whilst most normal kids only ever attended one. One good part was that my mum saved some money and bought me many new clothes just before I was once again sent away for a vacation. This time we were in Polish mountains together with other poor kids and I really liked one of the boys from the first sight. In the 2 weeks that we spent there I never showed the guy that I liked him and agreed to be a girlfriend of another boy, as my confidence was non-existent back then. On the last day of holiday I found out that actually my first choice also really liked me, so I broke up with the other boy and spent the last day and night with The One! Not what you think though! Us, older kids were allowed to stay up till the sunrise on the last day of holiday and watch the movies. It was the first time I drank coffee to stay awake and we sat on the wooden chairs next to each other, watching movies and holding hands under the blanket. How romantic was this? It does make me smile. I think this was the one and only romantic time we had though. Next day we came back home and although I was visiting the nearby village where all my new friends lived, somehow we never became a thing. That party at the end of summer which everyone was going to attend and stay in a huge tent overnight was my last chance for a romantic moment with The One. I seriously can't remember how I managed to perform this miracle and attend it, but my MOTIVATION was clearly spot on back then! Yes, we drank alcohol and smoked cigarettes. Guys put up a huge tent while girls were picking up wood for a bonfire. We sang songs and had lots of laughter. I can’t remember exactly what happened with The One anymore, probably nothing major. What I can remember vividly was that there were 2 Monika’s and whenever somebody called one, both answered. That night Fantagira was born. One of the older guys gave me this nickname after the Italian fantasy series ‘Fantaghiro’ aka ‘The cave of a golden rose’. In Polish language however, all female names end with an ‘a’, hence why Fantagira replaced Fantaghiro. I once read an article in a magazine about people whose surnames would define their life choices. Like for example Edward Driver would become a driving instructor or Anastasia Flower would become a famous gardener etc. One could wonder if the same applies to a nickname. Who was Fantaghiro?
On Wikipedia we can read this about her: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fantaghir%C3%B2_series *The youngest princess of three, she is outspoken, headstrong and never retreats from battle. Although beautiful and intelligent, she causes many problems for her family because she goes against everything expected for a woman in her kingdom, by being literate, adventurous and rebellious, which makes her father furious. In the first film, she is an impulsive troublemaker who likes to provoke her father and sisters, but underneath it she has a good heart. By the second film onwards, she is accepted as a fighter who will do whatever it takes to protect her loved ones, even if that means sacrificing her own life. She is deeply in love with Romualdo, who was previously her kingdom's enemy. They are married in the third film and adopt the orphaned Princess Esmeralda as their daughter.* *Fantaghirò tries to befriend all creatures and people she meets, unless they try to harm those she cares about. She is very forgiving and looks past physical appearances.* What can I say? In first movie Fantaghiro dressed up as a man to prove her worth to her dad. I dressed more like a men when I was younger and always used to prefer male friends. Most of my working life I also spent amongst men in engineering, fighting to prove my worth. For a randomly picked nickname, this is surprisingly accurate. I am not so much of a fighter these days, I pick my battles or skip them altogether, but younger me was definitely all that and some more! Now I wonder if it was in fact just a random selection as I have always thought? I will most likely never know. I can tell you a fun fact though! My Italian friend who was helping me with allotment work last week also uses the same nickname from the same movie! Fun fact 2: she is also number 7 in numerology and although the series above consisted of 5 movies, initially there were meant to be 7 of them. *Fantaghirò would have continued to travel to parallel worlds, including ours, before returning home to find it too an alternative reality where she would face an evil version of herself.* This almost sounds like me and Ernesto! Except my inner donkey is not really evil, just stubborn. Until next time 💙 **************************************************************** *Uff... This was a long read. If you managed to read all the way till the end, please leave a comment below, so I can give you a medal ;)*
67 comments
I am smiling while reading This.. it sounds that you have cool childhood memories despite of what happened to your parents.
Thanks Angela, I was also smiling a lot while writing this. Many lovely, innocent memories.
Wow! You had a tough childhood days! Kudos, my friend! You're one tough woman too!
This is a very small part of my childhood. It’s the happier part 😉 Thank you for reading, it was a long one!
It sounds a lot like my life. You're welcome, my friend!
I will be definitely up for reading more about yours if you decide to write about it 💙
awww. i'll try sometime. thank you.
I can say I enjoyed reading this post and thank you for honouring us by sharing deep and hidden things we didn't know. You went through a lot but you came out so beautifully. Your heart is kind and you are amazing. I wish I can go back to give you a much nicer background but see how you have beautifully evolved. Yes, there are similarities in your nickname and you. Flower and Driver got me laughing hahahaha. Maybe you love drinking Fanta 🤣🤣😂🤣😂
I’m happy to make you laugh my friend. Fanta is actually my least favourite drink 😅 If only this was so easy. Changing 1 thing could change everything - for better or worse. I wouldn’t be me. I enjoyed writing this too. Many lovely memories came fo mind and made me smile. I ignored my timer and carried on writing till 2am though, so I must sleep now.
Hahaha. What kind of drink do you like? I don't fancy Fanta too and I was hoping to make an exception if it was your favourite drink 🤣🤣😂🤣. I hope you managed to sleep?
Water is my favourite, but I do have occasionally diet coke or sprite/7 up. I did, but I woke up early, then another late night and today I am exhausted. Early night it is!
Hahaha, sorry about that. Try and sleep early then. You need all the strength you can muster. Yes, I love water and Sprite/7 up is my thing too. Not much of a diet coke person though. At least, we have some things in common, yaaaay!
I would be surprised if we didn’t! 💙
Hahaha me too.
Lovely introduction on your nickname. Now we know. So, your Italian friend is using Fantaghirò and not Fantagira?
I think it’s the latter, but not 100% sure. I will ask her tomorrow.
What a colorful childhood you have. Your childhood experiences makes you the strong woman you are now. Glad that you was not drag down by the system but instead came out of it strong and beautiful. The nickname suits you too. Now, where can I find that Italian series, The Cave of the Golden Rose.
Thank you for your kind words Judith. Sometimes it’s just good to get the load off your back. After reading about the series on Wiki while writing this article last night, I would also like to watch the series again. I’ll let you know if I find it anywhere 💙
So interesting story .. But am curious though. Did you finished your studies? You mentioned engineering.. Do you have a family now? For sure,, you are a strong woman molded by your past experiences.
Hi Jane. Thank you for reading and asking these questions. Yes, against everything and everyone I first finished banking and accountancy college (college is a requirement to go to the University in Poland), then did my Bachelor degree in Math with IT as a specialisation. I was living out of my parents house by then with my future husband. When I moved to England, by some weird incident a fell into engineering work and stayed. I don’t have a family as such. I was planning one with my ex husband, but he started having an alcohol problem similarly to my dad and under no circumstances I wanted my children to go through what I did. I postponed family and divorced my husband. Now I’m getting a bit too old for having my own children and there are plenty unwanted ones, so I started considering becoming a foster parent.
Oh that's sad.. How old are you if you don't mind? Some still get pregnant at 30+.. But sometimes a woman need more rest to have that. But good thing you were able to get a degree despite of your childhood experiences..
I just turned 39, but age is not the only reason why I decided against having my own children. I really don't think its sad. Society makes us think that having children and family is the only way to live a happy life, but it is not true in my opinion.
Not true to me as well. I even want to remain single forever 🤣
Hahaha 🤣 How old are you now Jane? I love being in relationships and I love being single. Both have their advantages and disadvantages 💙
Amazing reading my friend!!! Absolutely impossible to stop reading!!! You are a strong Warrior, that I already knew. But life made you walk on high roaps and you took it like a adventure, instead of playing a victim. Thank you for opening your soul with us 🥰❤️✨
Adventure it was for sure Marisa! There was lots of fun intertwined with pain, which younger me just didn’t see as painful. Hence why relationships turn out similarly in my life. That’s my idea of love 💙
I did enjoy reading your article. You have a tough experience in your childhood. How I wish to be like you. Have the courage and strong personality. ☺️ You shared your childhood days smoothly short but deep,. I know you had endure a lot..
Thank you for your kind words Zhyne. Nice seeing you in my corner for the first time and I appreciate time you took to read it. I wasn’t born strong, but I had to become strong for my mum and my brother. I’m sure you would too 💙
Yes we are. We need to be strong for our love ones. ☺️🥰
I enjoyed reading your article. And I appreciate the open way you tell about the difficult moments of your childhood. Without a doubt, you are a courageous woman who had known how to face circumstances and shine. I don't know if it was a coincidence or not. But I have the impression that your Nickname is perfect for you. And you've gained a reader here too ;)
Thank you Eliana. I was utterly clueless, but at the same time extremely lucky to have met just the right people and read the right books that helped me face the challenges. It’s lovely to have you as my reader 💙
Keep going and keep it up😊
Hello dear friend, it is an incredible story that you share with us today, because you tell strong moments of your life and that indicates that little by little you overcame every sad memory you had, I was fascinated with what you tell us. I find it curious that you felt better in a foster home than with your own parents and this leads me to think about how wrong some people are when they say that a child without parents for some time, will deviate from the path of good and end up bad, however today I am reading a great woman, who used the bad things that happened to her to grow, to move forward, to progress and be a better person, your wounds remind you that stopping is not an option. All those experiences that you lived, forged your character and nice personality, without a doubt that nickname that they gave you goes very well with you, it fits you perfectly, because you fight for what you want, because you give the value to the things that deserve it, I am very glad that despite the obstacles of life, today you are in a better place, in a better position and have faced everything in the best way, the environment where you spent your adolescence, influenced much in what you are today, every experience was worth it, thanks for sharing this my dear friend, greetings.
It took a long time for me to be able to talk about my past. I had always felt ashamed, as if any of this was my fault. Now I understand that it is nothing to be ashamed of and talking about this openly feel very healing for me. I don’t think it’s unusual for a child to feel better in foster care/orphanage. Every child naturally wants to be with their parents, but parents often shouldn’t be parents, because they’re emotionally unstable and hurt their children physically and/or mentally. My friend has recently became a foster parent and the girl she’s looking after can not stay even 10 minutes when she takes her to see her parents. She gets really stressed and wants now avoids the contact at all cost. I can understand it well. Thank you for taking time to read this article. The nickname seems to be very fitting, but after all these years I am tired of fighting. I just want some peace ☺️
Wow, I understand perfectly, of course, one wants to be in a place where they make us feel good, where we feel safe, my respects friend, you are certainly a woman to admire, an example to follow, because such stories inspire, no doubt the constant wars tire, there comes a time where peace is as vital as water, however you will always be a warrior my dear friend, even if not in a battle, the simple fact of continuing to stand makes you a great warrior only one, greetings
That’s such a beautiful thing to say. Thank you so much my friend 💙
That was great to read my friend, your nickname was borned because of that and that was a treasure that one of the older guys give it to you. I am amazed of your story since you were child. I know your thoughts now are lighter and you are happy og somehow you share your hidden past. This is my first time I read your article but I was impressed. Your work are laid off as you can see by the bot upvote you.
Thank you for stopping by and taking your time to read this. Rusty and I seem to be good friends now ;)
hehe Yes I see it , I am writing but bot don't visit me, I am earning this because of my 3 nephew that their parents left them to work in other places in the Philippines. I know they are young when they are left but they keep saying me like daddy even I have no wife so that I am bringing them foods in them when I went home, I feel that they are my sons.haha https://noise.cash/post/147znppw
I see he's been visiting you regularly in the past. Maybe comments like this one above have something to do with less visits?
Yes in the past and lately in the new post he not visit a lot and if he visit put 0.01$ haha but its ok I think its a challange I guess to me.
You can say that again. It was indeed a long read which I didn't even realize because I was busy enjoying the whole story lol You know I wanted to find out about the name Fantagira only for me to find out many more lol. But first, I would wanna ask why you are using "THE ONE" is it for privacy or security reason? I bet it is and it's okay lol. Seriously you starting smoking? At that age? Though you didn't state exactly the age at the time you started smoking but I am thinking it was around 10-15? My estimation could be wrong anyway lol. You know you got me laughing when you said that it was easier to lie and go free when there were no mobile phones then lol. And you aren't entirely wrong considering that a person can be easily contacted now with a phone to know what's going on or to easily pick the truth in most lies lol. >my inner donkey is not really evil, just stubborn. I could have easily said that sounds way like me hahahhaha, but I remember someone warned me about telling people I was stubborn lol. Now, this was really a fun read and it doesn't matter if I get a medal or not for it lol. I was smiling all through. And I wouldn't have even known you promised a medal if I didn't get to the bottom lol.
I don’t know why, but I get very excited when I see the long comments. I guess it’s because in order to write a long comment, someone must have read thoroughly and whatever I wrote must have touched them in one way or another. I love this feeling. I am very happy you enjoyed reading this so much that you didn’t realise it was so long. That is the best complement a writer can hear. ‘The one’ hasn’t got much of a meaning. His name is Tomasz if I remember well and apart from this one summer holiday he never played a big role in my life. I guess I used ‘The one’ to build a bit of mystery around it all ; ) I was 13 when I started smoking. Yes, it was very early and only just over a year ago I stopped. Whether for good this time, I don’t know, as I stopped a few times before, but always came back. It is true though, isn’t? In the past you’d stress about talking to your parents when you get home, but you’d have fun knowing they can’t reach you until then 😅 Although these days kids just turn off their phones when they don’t want to be contacted. I hear that from other parents. See now you don’t need to say it’s you who’s stubborn, but the animal who lives inside you. The risk is that they might think you’re bonkers, but I’m fine with this 😅 Thank you for sticking to the end and I appreciate you taking time to leave this nice and long reply 💙
Lol, I can understand because I feel the same. I am glad this gave you a great feeling. I hope to read more from you. Yes, you are right about turning off phone these days when kids don't want to be disturbed by their parents lol. I was guilty of this until I learned better and stopped doing it. I understand they were worried about me but most times my mom especially wants me to get back home so I can continue the work that was lying and waiting for me lol. I understood her because I was the only girl at home, my only sister was away from home and the rest were boys lol.
I felt sad about your parents, but your experience from orphanages to friends and etc honed you to become a better person, I can say that your nickname is so apt and perfect for the female version of fantaghero. Your story is amazing because you're a fighter and overcomer. Reminds me of the Queen's Gambit in netflix, I am imagining that set up from your story.
Thank you for stopping by and reading my story. I have never watched Queen's Gambit. Will check it out 💙
Oh that sounds like a kinda difficult but fun life? 😅 I think I should check out that series too. Sounds like it's interesting to watch. I hope I can find a video with an English subtitle.
It has been a bit of both, yes. Good luck with the series. I use to love watching it 💙
Omg it's on YouTube. Haha. Will watch some now.
Oh wow! I never even tried YouTube! I’ll watch next week too. Let me know if you liked it 💙
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