You in the Middle

Gusto ko nalang maging popcorn chaar

~

You in the Middle, I hope if you're reading this you'll share with us your thoughts and feelings. Because this is a point of view of someone from the Last and you may or may not agree, nevertheless it's an opinion purely from observation and experience. Things may vary.

Middle child from a Last child's point of view.

In a family, we have this so called "position" or "title" as a child. If you're the first born, then the eldest title is yours. If you happen to be the 2nd child, you're in a middle (unless you're only two siblings), 3rd, 4th, 5th and so on are considered as the middle children until the last born entered the world and grabbed the title "youngest". If you're an only child, well you have the unique title "only child" as it is.

I am not trying to compare for the purpose of showing which is better birth order whatsoever, but rather point out some things about those who are born in the middle. No one is better or worst but for me birth orders do influence the personality of a person.

In a family of five that I belong, my title is the youngest. Often times, people see us as spoiled brats getting everything we want. We are the favorite ones and full of attentions, I can say that not all the time and not true to all youngest child. I honestly think that youngest children grows dependent because a lot of people is guiding them along the way but they (or we) do mature and learn how to stand on our own as time goes by. On the other hand, eldest child are often responsible and have this strong personality because the title holds a huge responsibility both as a daughter or son and as the eldest sibling. There are also situations that eldest are bossy and strict which is often understandable but sometimes too much. When consideration takes place one can reason out "it's because I'm the eldest" or "I'm the youngest so it's just right". In line with this, where does the middle child stands?

Middle child/children tend to be more considerate because they are standing in between. Neither the eldest nor the youngest. There are instances that they're overshadowed by their siblings' personality and feel like they're getting less attention hence being "caught in the middle" (also refer as the Middle Child Syndrome). To obey someone and make the other follow him/her at the same time may build confusion thus sometimes lead to low self confidence. However being in the middle makes them good in communication and figuring things out. Since they have to balance between the older and younger ones, they tend to see both sides and can react well with certain situations, and also more emotionally stable than the others. Further, they are dubbed as the "peacemakers" in the family. I have 4 older siblings and the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th sisters are the middle children, they possessed different characteristics and attitude but I agree that all of them are understanding in their own ways.

I also think that age gaps do influence a child's behavior. For example, the age gap of our 1st and second born is one year, 2nd and 3rd born is two years, 3rd and 4th is five years, and lastly my 4th sister and me is two years. As you can see my 3rd and 4th sister have a huge age gap which allowed my 3rd sister to be a baby for a long time compared to my other siblings. I observed that even she's a middle child, my 3rd sister is such a baby, sometimes much more than me I swear. Often times they said that my 3rd sister is my dad's favorite because he give her this and that. I also felt this when I'm in highschool and my dad won't attend parent's meeting in my class even though I do well in class (not to brag), while he always attend my 3rd sister parent's when she was in highschool and he never hesitate to be an officer for the whole batch. As I grew older my dad explained to me that it is because my sister needs a lot of guidance. She keeps on messing with her studies and so dad have to see to it that she's not rebelling or whatever.

When it comes to my 2nd and 4th sister, I can see the "middle child" behavior more evidently. My 2nd sister is the smartest among us and always the calm one. She never showed us how stressed she is, at some point it makes my mom worry more since my sister didn't open up and just showed us that she can do it. My 4th sister is my definition of strong independent woman. She never cared for being a top student but she's happy when she found her passion (currently a dj and a host in her own program in FB, she also become an annoucer in our local radio). Even though she experienced lots of anxieties, she never told us about it and just shared it to me soon as she overcome it. She's the first person who spoil me with love in different ways. We're not super close and I sometimes hate her for being sensitive but I love her as much as I love my other siblings.

A middle child from the youngest child point of view varies but one thing is certain for me, they are really considerate. They follow and respect our eldest and give way for me, the youngest.

We have different family set up but I guess there are those who can relate. All siblings are amazing and the connection we have no matter how many arguments we face will never be broken. The same reason why I can't blame those only child if they become envious of those who have siblings.

Whatever birth order you're in, never forget that you decide which path to take, other factors may affect your decision but it will always be you.

Thank you so much for reading this article😊

Showing a random selfie of me and Charlotte's daughter hahah