Joined 10 June 2023 · 10 posts
too good for you
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@casval
I swear i have little patience nowadays, i should really change my way of not ignoring people, building a high thick wall in my life right now feels good.. It's the first time I regret meeting a person so bad.. never again, so childish *facepalm* I'm trying to build my peace but this person just ruins it, but the more I'm annoyed of myself because I'm entertaining such behaviour, but this will be the last time, the following days ill be ignoring you for good *sigh*
@casval
lingering emotions Hey to the person whom I loved the most, It's been so long, but the pain is still close. Two years have passed, or maybe it's three, Lost in the memories, I can't seem to break free. Do you still hold onto the words I once said, About how my love for you will never fade? I wonder if you still feel it somewhere, Or if our love has vanished into thin air. Every day, I think about what could have been, Drawn back to you, trapped in this bittersweet dream. The tears still flow, I can't help but wonder, If you miss me too, as my heart continues to plunder. Part of me wishes you'd reach out once more, But I'm afraid of what my reaction would be, for sure. I fear I might give in, or push you away, Silence might be the only words I can say. I know it's pathetic, I can hear you laugh, At how I'm still suffering, trapped in the past. I don't want to burden my friends anymore, So here I am, sharing my pain, feeling so unsure. I just want to express what's in my heart, To shake off this feeling, tear myself apart. But even as I type, tears stream down my face, I promised myself I wouldn't cry, but life is a cruel chase. And you know what's funny in this despair? Meeting friends who still remember and care. They ask about you, casually say your name, Each mention brings back the pain, igniting the flame. I fake a smile, deny my broken heart, Pretend I'm unaffected, change the subject, play the part. Fake it till you make it they say with a grin, But deep down, I'm still haunted by you within. Hey, why do you still linger in my dreams, A ghost from the past, tearing at the seams? I long to move on, to find peace and rest, But your memory refuses to let me forget.
@casval
my morning starts to shine with teardrops in my eyes In the stillness of the morning, tears fill my weary eyes a dream of you, a bittersweet surprise. I wake with a heaviness, unsure if i should cry, But I've grown accustomed to this pain, oh how times flies. I know why you haunt my dreams, why you linger still, a bitter taste within my heart that I can't seem to fulfill. My subconscious plays a cruel game, reliving memories past, a futile hope, a longing that will never last. Lost in the darkness, I willingly remain, choosing to dwell in the shadows, embracing the pain. Suffocating, yes, but not as before, lighter now, a glimmer of hope, I adore. As I sit upon my bed, memories flooding my mind, lost in a daze, those moments so kind, what can I do? I cannot control, these fragments of love that took its toll. I yearn to forget, to erase it all, to wipe away the pain, to heed destiny's call. For the past, with you, holds no solace or peace, I long for freedom, for this ache to cease. But dreams and memories, they linger in my core, a constant reminder of what was and is no more. so, I'll face the morning, the tears in my eyes, hoping one day, my heart will be free from these ties.
@casval
It feels like home I always feel like I am floating and not on the ground these past few years and months, I don't feel satisfied staying at home at all, so whenever I get the chance to go out like a friend asking me to come over no matter how far their place is, I immediately say yes without question, I've always felt like I was traveling, you could say I discovered some unpleasant experiences with those journeys, wait! I just realized while typing, is this what they call finding oneself? hahaha! Have I really? hmm... I think so. My life has been a roller coaster, and by that, I mean getting depressed and comparing myself to others, so I always try my best to match what they have. After running with them, I stopped on track observing, comparing, and realizing why do I have to match theirs? there's nothing to be jealous about, I run my life differently, and I can do whatever I want without others dictating what I do, It's my life, I control it, my rules and so I decided to love myself, so far I'm spoiling myself with everything I want. I came home and for the first time I don't feel like running away again, I'm no longer floating, I'm already on the ground and it was the first time that it feels like home.
@casval
I hate inconsiderate people... To be honest I can't wait to go home, imma flip this wordly hell im into... Just you wait
@casval
I want to disappear I'm feeling hopeless, I just want to disappear from this world June 15, 2023 a day i wont forget Listening to Fujii Kaze - Lonely Rhapsody Crying...
@casval
I cried again lol
@casval
I cried again lol
@casval
Happiness is a choice right?
@casval
Hello! I lost my seed phrase thus the new account, although the previous one didn't have many articles so it's actually a dead account, nothing much to lose. I don't know if this one will be different but let's say "new account, new me" kind of thing. I find this platform peaceful, it's kinda like a new environment Anyways, some may recognize me by this name and some won't, but hi to my friends who knows me ~ Nice to meet you!